Bobby Brady's doin' crack
Marsha's on the pill
Mike's in bed with 
AliceSam's sells dog chops at his meat shop
Greg is tryin on garter belts and 
Pete just spent two nights in jail
Murder in the 
Brady House
Cause Jan 
Brady couldn't stand it
Murder in the 
Brady House
Things were just too great
Murder in the 
Brady house
Someone had to break
Cindy called 
Jan a stinker for playin' ball inside house
Taddle-tailed while 
Alice kissed the post man on the mouth
Blood is on the 
TV screen and guts are on the stairs
Murder in the 
Brady House
And no one even cares
Murder in the 
Brady House
Things were just too great
Murder in the 
Brady House
Someone had to break