[00:06]I read a news today, oh boy,
[00:12]About a lucky man who made a grade,
[00:19]And though the news was rather sad,
[00:24]Well, I just had to laugh.
[00:31]I saw the photograph.
[00:37]He blew his mind out in a car,
[00:43]He didn't notice that the lights have changed,
[00:49]A crowd of people stood and stared,
[00:55]They've seen his face before,
[00:58]Nobody was really sure if he was from the House of Lords.
[01:05]I saw a film today, oh boy,
[01:11]The English army had just won the war,
[01:17]A crowd of people turned away,
[01:23]But I just had a look,
[01:26]Having read a book, I'd love to turn you on...
[01:40]Woke up, fell out of bed,
[01:43]dragged a comb across my head,
[01:48]found my way downstairs and drank a cup,
[01:51]and looking up I noticed I was late.
[01:54]Found my coat and grabbed my head,
[01:58]made the bus in second flat,
[02:03]found my way upstairs and had a smoke,
[02:07]and somebody spoke and I went into a dream
[02:38]I read a news today, oh boy,
[02:44]four thousand holes in Blackburn Lancashire,
[02:51]and though the holes were rather small,
[02:57]they had to count them all,
[03:00]now they know how many holes it takes to fill the Albert Hall,
[03:05]I'd love to turn you on.