[00:17.46]Charles Nelson Reilly was a mighty man
[00:19.44]The kind of man you'd never disrespect
[00:22.45]He stood 8 foot tall, wore glasses
[00:24.63]And he had a third nipple on the back of his neck
[00:28.70]He ate his own weight in coal
[00:30.63]And excreted diamonds every day
[00:34.26]He could throw you down a flight of stairs
[00:36.23]But you still would love him anyway
[00:39.35]Yeah, you know you'd love him anyway
[00:45.60]
[00:53.73]Charles Nelson Reilly won the Tour de France
[00:55.92]With two flat tires and a missin' chain
[00:58.98]He trained a rattlesnake to do his laundry
[01:01.54]I'm tellin' you the man was insane
[01:04.61]He could rip out your beatin' heart
[01:06.92]And show it to you right before you died
[01:10.67]Every day he'd make the host of Match Game
[01:12.99]Give him a piggyback ride
[01:15.29]Yeah, a two-hour piggyback ride
[01:17.98]Giddyup, Gene!
[01:20.11]
[01:30.49]Ninja warrior, master of disguise
[01:32.67]He could melt your brain with his laser beam eyes
[01:35.36]Oh yeah
[01:38.36]Oh yeah
[01:41.17]He had his very own line at the DMV
[01:43.54]He made sweet, sweet love to a manatee
[01:46.36]Oh yeah
[01:49.42]Oh yeah, that was somethin' to see, I tell ya
[01:52.61]Charles Nelson Reilly sold his toenail clippings
[01:54.99]As a potent aphrodisiac
[01:57.98]He ran a four minute mile blindfolded
[02:00.67]With an engine block strapped to his back
[02:03.86]He could eat more frozen waffles
[02:06.11]Than any other man I know
[02:09.61]Once he fell off the Chrysler building
[02:11.74]And he barely even stubbed his toe
[02:14.67]Had a tiny little scratch on his toe
[02:17.23]Didn't even hurt
[02:23.49]
[02:29.17]Charles Nelson Reilly figured out cold fusion
[02:31.42]But he never ever told a soul
[02:34.73]I've seen the man unhinge his jaw
[02:36.93]And swallow a Volkswagen whole
[02:40.74]He'd bash your face in with a shovel
[02:42.79]If you didn't treat him like a star
[02:45.54]'Cause you can spit in the wind or tug on Superman's cape
[02:48.17]But Lord knows you just don't mess around with CNR
[02:53.92]
[02:56.55]No no no
[03:01.30]Talkin' bout CNR
[03:08.17]Ohh