[00:00.000] 作曲 : Robert Lopez/Trey Parker/Matt Stone
[00:00.323]ELDER PRICE: You all know the Bible
[00:02.244]Is made of Testaments old and new.
[00:06.088]You've been told it's just those two parts,
[00:08.990]Or only one if you're a Jew.
[00:13.072]But what if I were to tell you
[00:15.616]There's a FRESH third part out there?
[00:18.975]Which was found by a HIP new prophet
[00:21.907]Who had a little...
[00:24.052]Donny Osmond flair?
[00:30.532]Have you heard of the All-American Prophet?
[00:35.116]The blonde-haired, blue-eyed voice of God!
[00:38.665]He didn't come from the Middle East like those other holy men
[00:43.342]No, God's favorite prophet was...
[00:45.903]All-American!
[00:49.019]I'm gonna take you back to Biblical times,1823!
[00:52.659]An American man named Joe livin' on a farm in the holy land of Rodchester, New York!
[00:57.810]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: You mean the Mormon prophet Joseph Smith?!
[00:59.819]ELDER PRICE: That's right, that young man spoke to God!
[01:01.868]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: He spoke to God?!
[01:03.021]ELDER PRICE: And God said: "Joe, people really need to know
[01:05.026]That the Bible isn't two parts!
[01:06.747]There's a part THREE to the Bible, Joe!
[01:09.390]And I, God have anointed you
[01:11.111]To dig up this part three that is buried by the tree on the hill in your backyard!"
[01:14.934]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: Wow, God says go to you backyard and start digging, that makes PERFECT SENSE!
[01:19.764]ELDER PRICE: Joseph Smith went up to that hill,
[01:21.579]And dug where he was told.
[01:23.808]And deep in the ground, Joseph found
[01:25.965]Shining plates of gold!
[01:28.253]JOSEPH SMITH: What are these golden plates?
[01:30.005]Who buried them here, and why?
[01:32.177]ELDER PRICE: Then appeared an angel
[01:34.162]His name was Moroni-
[01:37.542]MORONI: I am Moroni....
[01:40.216]The All-American Angel!
[01:43.539]My people lived here long, long ago
[01:47.216]This is the history of my race
[01:49.980]Please read the words within'
[01:52.138]We were Jews who met with Christ,
[01:54.044]But we were...
[01:56.811]But don't let anybody see these plates except for you...
[02:02.388]They are only for you to see...
[02:05.873]Even if people ask you to show the plates to them, DON'T.
[02:10.879]Just copy them onto normal paper.
[02:14.885]Even thought this might make them question if the plates are real or not,
[02:19.819]This is sort of what God is going for...
[02:25.425]ELDER PRICE:  Joseph took the plates home,
[02:27.262]And wrote down what he found inside
[02:29.443]He turned those plates into a book,
[02:31.593]Then he rushed into town and cried:
[02:33.113]JOSEPH SMITH: Hey! God spoke to me and gave me
[02:35.330]This blessed ancient tome!
[02:37.443]He hath commanded me to publish it,
[02:39.388]And stick it in every home!
[02:41.983]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: Wow! So the Bible is actually a trilogy,
[02:44.828]and the Book of Mormon is Return of the Jedi?! I'm interested!
[02:50.125]ELDER PRICE: Now, many people didn't believe the prophet Joseph Smith.
[02:54.097]They thought he'd made up this part three
[02:56.073]that was buried by a tree on the hill in his backyard! (TOWNSPEOPLE: LIAR!)
[02:59.219]But Joe said-
[03:00.521]JOSEPH SMITH: This is no lie
[03:01.741]I speak to God all the time,
[03:02.632]And he told me to head west!
[03:04.482]So I'll take my part three from the hill with the tree,
[03:06.853]Feel free if you'd like to come along with me,
[03:08.926]To the promised land! (TOWNSPEOPLE: The PROMISED LAND?)
[03:11.286]JOSEPH SMITH: Paradise!
[03:12.110]On the west coast! Nothing but fruit and fields as far as the eye can see!
[03:18.680]ALL: Have you heard of the All-American prophet?
[03:23.115]He found a brand new book about Jesus Christ!
[03:26.989]We're following him to paradise;
[03:29.428]We call ourselves Mormon
[03:31.382]And our new religion is...
[03:34.032]All-American!
[03:36.633]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: Well how much does it cost!?
[03:38.760]ELDER PRICE: The Mormons kept on searching for the place to settle down,
[03:42.878]But every time they thought they'd found it,
[03:45.015]They got kicked out of town
[03:47.076]And even though people wanted
[03:49.140]To see the golden plates,
[03:51.406]Joseph never showed'em-
[03:53.673]GOTSWANA: I-have maggots in my scro-tum-
[04:02.892]ELDER PRICE: Um... okay. Well, anyway...
[04:06.555]Now comes the part of our story that gets a little bit sad...
[04:12.908]On the way to the promised land,
[04:15.637]Mormons made people mad.
[04:19.069]Joseph was shot by an angry mob,
[04:22.245]And knew he'd soon be done....
[04:25.780]JOSEPH SMITH: You must lead the people now,
[04:29.706]My good friend... Brigham Young.
[04:34.894]Oh, God... why are you letting me die?
[04:40.510]Without having me show people the plates
[04:44.259]They'll have no proof I was telling the truth or not.
[04:48.639]They'll have to believe it just... cause...
[04:53.104]Oh! I guess that's kinda what you were going for....
[05:00.230]Blargggh...
[05:02.788]ELDER PRICE: The prophet Joseph Smith DIED for what he believed in.
[05:07.183]But his followers, they kept heading west.
[05:10.669]And Brigham Young led them to paradise. A sparkling land in Utah they called...
[05:16.393]Salt Lake City!
[05:19.119]And there the Mormons multiplied, and made BIG MORMON families.
[05:25.188]Generation to generation,
[05:27.844]Until finally... they made ME.
[05:31.080]And now it's MY JOB,
[05:33.090]TO LEAD YOU WHERE THOSE EARLY SETTLERS WERE LEAD LONG AGO!!!
[05:39.959]TOWNSPEOPLE and PRICE: Have you heard of the All-American prophet? (ELDER CUNNINGHAM: Kevin Price!!!)
[05:44.767]The next in line to be the voice of God?! (ELDER CUNNINGHAM: My best friend!!!)
[05:48.626]TOWNSPEOPLE and CUNNINGHAM: He's gonna do something incredible
[05:51.246]And be Joseph Smith again!
[05:53.009]Cause Kevin Price the prophet is...
[05:55.254]All- All- All-
[05:58.288]ALL-AMERICAN-!
[06:01.664]ELDER CUNNINGHAM: If you order now, we'll also throw in a set of steak knives!