作曲 : Ritchie Blackmore/Ian Gillan/Jon Lord/Ian Paice/Roger Glover Mary Long is a hypocrite She does all the things that she tells us not to do Selling filth from a corner shop And knitting patterns to the high street queue She paints roses, even makes them smell good And then she draws ******* on the khazy wall Drowns kittens just to get a thrill And writes sermons in the Sunday Chronicle How did you lose your virginity, Mary Long ? When will you lose your stupidity, Mary Long ? Mary told Johnny not to write such trash Said it was a waste of public money She made a fuss, they made apologies But everybody thought the show was funny When the nation knew you'd had children It came as such a surprise We really didn't know you'd had it in you How you did it we can only surmise How did you lose your virginity, Mary Long ? When will you lose your stupidity, Mary Long ? Mary Long, you're not alone But you're a long way behind our times What we do in full frontal view Is more honest than your clean-up mind What I'm saying, Mary Long is When you can spare a minute Go find your friend the porny Lord Dig your self a hole and jump in it How did you lose your virginity, Mary Long ? When will you lose your stupidity, Mary Long ? How did you lose your virginity, Mary Long ? When will you lose your stupidity, Mary Long ? Mary Long..... Mary Long..... Mary Long..... Mary Long..... Mary Long.....