Everything’s bad for you honey. 
 Everything’s bad for you 
 Don’t forget what your told or you’ll never grow old 
 everything’s bad for you. 
 Don’t laugh too much or cry too much or eat 
 a candy bar for your lunch don’t hope don’t dope 
 or hate the pope or use unhypoallergenic soap 
 don’t eat don’t chew don’t drive your car or pick 
 up strange men from the bar don’t pet stray cats 
 or smoke cigars cause all of it’s bad for you. 
 Yeah, everything’s bad for you from the sun in the sky 
 to the gum on your shoe, sleeping too much or having 
 nothing to do, everything’s bad for you. 
 Oh everything’s bad for you loud rock n’ roll and the 
 government too, swearing and staring in the swimming pools everything’s bad for you.
 TV shows and magazines, huffing on markers or gasoline dressing like a tramp or a beauty queen then trying to get to heaven but your hands ain’t clean yeah everything’s bad for you...