Well, I got a bad liver and a broken heart Yeah, I drunk me a river since you tore me apart And I don't have a drinking problem, except when I can't get a drink And I wish you'd a known her, we were quite a pair She was sharp as a razor and soft as a prayer So welcome to the continuing saga She was my better half and I was just a dog And so here I am slumped, I've been chipped I've been chumped on my stool So buy this fool some spirits and libations It's these railroad station bars And all these conductors and the porters And I'm all out of quarters And this epitaph is the aftermath Yeah, I choose my path, hey, come on, KathHe's a lawyer, he ain't the one for ya No, the moon ain't romantic, it's intimidating as hell And some guy's trying to sell me a watch And so I'll meet you at the Bottom of a bottle of bargain ScotchI got me a bottle and a dream It's so maudlin it seems You can name your poison Go on ahead and make some noise I ain't sentimental, this ain't a purchase It's a rental and it's purgatory And hey, what's your story, well, I don't even care' Cause I got my own double-cross to bear And I'll see your Red Label, and I'll raise you one more And you can pour me a cab, I just can't drink no more' Cause it don't douse the flames that are started by dames It ain't like asbestos, it don't do nothing but rest us assured And substantiate the rumors that you've heard