Standin' in the runway Wavin' at the plane There goes everything you own You called home collect And they didn't know your name Starin' at the telephone You thought he was a doctor Now he says he's not But the noices seem to tell for sure And according to the symptoms It isn't all you got A shame they haven't found a cure Didn't know the reason You start to feel the rub You know it isn't easy Well, welcome to the club Well, you thought they'd take it lightly They're actin' kinda rash Caught you in a loadin' zone So they smile very politely Relieved you of your cash Suddenly you're all alone You play the double agent You bug eachother's phone You got the place surrounded There ain't nobody home It's gettin' hard to please 'em You start to feel the rub You know it isn't easy Well, welcome to the club Come on and join us in the club