The Only Normal People - Steve Forbert
The only normal people
That you know they're doing well
And they'll be out there eating breakfast
At the Nelva Courts Hotel
And they'll be off and down the highway
In their this year's Chevrolet
And they're just three hours north of Gulfport
On their weekend holiday
A little getaway hey hey
For the only normal people
The only normal people
Tell you everything's alright
They said the sun comes up each morning
And the stars come out at night
And they said Kellogg still makes Corn Flakes
And that Classic Coke is back
And you know Reagan's in the White House
And his hair's a natural black
It's a natural fact
Says the only normal people
The only normal people
Drink their coffee sweet with cream
That's as they gaze out from their easy chairs
And color TV screens
And as they watch the world of problems
On their cable evening news
You know they wonder why
Those people choose to live the way they do
Don't they wanta do
Like the only normal people
The only normal people
Do exactly as they should
You know they never borrow money
And their credit's always good
You know they file their honest tax return
A month before it's due
And wave to all those nice policemen
Up on Grandview Avenue
Howdy-do to you
Says the only normal people
The only normal people
Never see coc*ine or smack
You know they don't smoke m*******a
And they're miles away from crack
And all those pills a doctor give them;
Help a sinus headache some
You know they'll drink because it's social
But they won't have more than one
Sorry gotta run
Says the only normal people
They go to church on Sunday
With their happy healthy son
Who's going to run their family business
Just as they themselves have done
And he will live to own a golf cart
And a backyard swimming pool
And he won't never sleep with boys
Or think of dropping outta school
It wouldn't sit too cool
With his only normal people
Ya the only normal people
Don't know anything about
Your world of sleepless night and pressures;
And they never once freak out
You know they run their lives on course
And they keep a steady even keel
They hear you talk about frustration
But they don't know how it feels
No it isn't real
For those only normal people
They eat their three square meals a day
And they do their exercise at night
And always look before they leap
And keep their seatbelts buckled tight
So they don't get into accidents
And wind-up on their backs
And they also don't get AIDS or cancer
And they don't have heart attacks
Can't you just relax
Like the only normal people
I bet they're down at J C Penny's
For that riding lawn mower now
You know that one that takes attachments
Like that ten blade garden plow
I bet you'll pass them down there smiling
As you race to beat the bell
They are the only normal people;
They're ones you don't know well
That you don't know well
They're the only normal people
That you don't know well
They're the only normal people
Ya ya ya
That you don't know well
They're the only normal people