作曲 : John Dempsey/Dana P. Rowe
 Cal:
 There's a reception
 Goin' on downstairs
 Sit back and watch the fun begin
 Come one, come all
 To the mourner's ball
 It costs you seven "I'm so sorry"s to get in
 Above the party games
 You hear them speak
 Of how the future's at the door
 They're hot to win
 To give the bottle spin
 But it's just me and me alone who knows the score
 And it's 'One, two, three!'
 That's how I feel about the future!
 That's how I deal with it all
 Livin' for the moment's rewards
 Knowin' destiny lies
 In these two hands
 Playing these three chords!
 You hear the whispers
 In the castle hall
 How could the king have passed away?
 The court pays dumb
 And the queen keeps mum
 But listen close
 And you can hear the jester play!
 Cal and Chorus:
 One, two, three!'
 Cal:That's how I feel about the future!
 One, two, three!'
 Cal:
 That's how I deal with it all
 One, two, three!'
 Livin' for the moment's rewards
 Knowin' destiny lies
 In these two hands
 Playing these three chords!
 These three...
 Cal:Desperate chords, desperate harmonics
 Despterate dominance, on two desperate tonics
 Desperate rhymes for you desperate pleasures
 'Cause desperate times call for desperate measures
 Desperate times, Cal
 Desperate times
 'One, two, three!'
 That's how I feel about the future!
 'One, two, three!'
 That's how I deal with it all
 'One, two, three!'
 Livin' for the moment's rewards
 Playin';
 'One, two, three!'
 That's how to feel about the future!
 'One, two, three!'
 That's how to deal with it all
 'One, two, three!'
 Livin' for the moment's rewards
 Knowin' destiny lies
 In these two hands
 Playing these three chords!
 Yes, these two hands
 Playing these...
 Three...
 Chords...