作词 : Katharine Neil
 作曲 : Andrea Boccadoro
Rich but not satisfied? Mayhap you have not tried
This one weird trick for displaying your wealth:
Buy herbs and confections to boost your complexion
And pass idle hours tending to your health.
Beware conspirations, plots and machinations
The schemes of Big Physick to sell you their wares!
Their cures do us violence but they call it science
They mock our beliefs and belittle our fears.
Perils await ‘mongst the food on your plate
Are you verily sure that your dinner is "clean"?
At meals you explain how food causes you pain
But your friends and relations are verily mean!
Prithee take care, for say did you hear
What the Countess of Devonshire says about peas?
They corrupt your humours, and cause cancer tumours
So doubtless they're causing your current disease.
When you are shook by something in a book
Where it says that you might have some rare malady
See Doctor Forman, be sure to inform him
You have it on very good authority!