[00:00.00]Hello, Mega Man. und Mrs. Mega Man.
[00:03.29]Welcome to couples' therapy. I'm Dr. Wily.
[00:05.54]Dr. Wily? You're a therapist now?
[00:08.16]But you're evil, and bent on world domination!
[00:09.88]Not anymore. Those days are behind me.
[00:12.30]Don't question it! Shut up. Just tell me the problem over this hot beat.
[00:15.94]Okay...
[00:16.48]Well you see, Doc, I got a pretty nice life
[00:18.52]A Mega House with two kids, and a hot Mega Wife
[00:20.55]But I got a little problem with my android bride
[00:22.74]When it comes to making love, she's never satisfied
[00:24.88]We've been fucking for decades! Sex has gotten routine!
[00:26.85]We gotta spice that shit up, I'm not a total machine!
[00:28.88]I'm sick of all the romance, and the cuddles, and the love
[00:31.14]It's time to get dirty and do all the weird stuff!
[00:32.90]It would be seeming to me that the problem here
[00:36.83]Is you don't listen to your wife, she is being clear
[00:41.08]But she says the same thing, like a tape recorder!
[00:43.23]Quiet! The doctor is talking -- there must be order!
[00:45.92]...Sorry, I'm not evil anymore.
[00:49.53]You must beat the Robot Masters to acquire skills
[00:53.50]And then use them on your wife when she is getting drilled
[00:58.00]Maybe she likes shocks from Elec Man's beam
[01:01.93]Or getting burnt by fireballs; she's a freaky man's dream
[01:06.39]Is that what you want, hon? A Robot Master?
[01:08.56]Get out and do it, you stupid bastard!
[01:10.75]Your marriage will be healthy like pure spring water
[01:12.86]Now leave my office before you are slaughtered!
[01:14.91]Fine, I'll kick ass if it saves my marriage
[01:16.90]For the satisfaction of my lady's undercarriage
[01:19.03]First I'll take on Fire Man, not much of a test
[01:20.82]Oh, your weakness is ice? I woulda never fucking guessed.
[01:23.11]Now Ice Man is here, this shouldn't take up too much time
[01:25.18]Oh, is your weakness fire? You just blew my fucking mind.
[01:27.39]I cut Cut Man and he's gonna need stitches
[01:29.53]Bomb and Elec Man just went down like little bitches
[01:31.61]Wait, you douchebag, I'm gonna end your life
[01:35.52]I am Mega Man Zero, and I'm here to plow your wife
[01:39.63]I bring sex moves from the future, and my skills are vast
[01:43.67]Like my super double ultra mega nutbuster cumblast (Oh!)
[01:48.41]Women can't resist my blonde flowing locks
[01:51.89]I'll slap a stamp right on my package and deliver your wife the cock
[01:56.17]My shining armor is red, the color of victory
[02:00.49]While your fruity suit is blue, like your balls will soon be
[02:05.63]Wait! What are you doing...?
[02:08.58]Mega Dick... activate!
[02:13.17]So Mega Man harnessed all the powers of the Masters
[02:15.58]And killed Zero with his mega laser schlong-blaster
[02:17.64]And then he banged his wife until she screamed "Yes! More!"
[02:19.72]Then she loved him again, 'cause she's a shallow whore
[02:23.05]Sorry, that was misogynistic.
[02:26.05]She is a whore, though.
[02:27.17]What did you say?!
[02:28.37]Nothing!
[02:29.90]...Douche.