[02:34.-2]Welcome to our country.
[02:59.-3]She went to the airport,and she's gonna go for it with Ross.
[03:18.-1]Yes,we did. Thanks to Vidal Buffay.
[03:50.-2]You said he liked me!
[03:56.-1]That's all right. We got the bags.
[04:10.-3]Everyone,this is Julie.
[05:13.-3]Isn't that great?
[05:15.-3]Isn't that just kick-you-in-the-crotch, spit-on-your-neck fantastic?
[07:10.-2]He said....
[08:17.-2]Because I'm just....
[08:19.-1]I'm incredibly anal and an unbelievable control freak.
[09:03.-4]All right,when was 1 990? 1990
[12:02.-2]People do stupid things when they're upset.
[13:59.-1]-That's it. I quit. -What? I didn't say anything!
[15:22.-2]Now we'll do your inseam.
[16:46.-1]Come on,how can I just tell him? What about Julie?
[20:04.-4]That was a stupid thing I did.
[21:05.-1]"Oh,my God. I'm with Rachel!"
[22:18.-4]No.
[00:02.38]This is pretty much what's happened so far.
[00:05.32]Ross was in love with Rachel since forever.
[00:08.32]Every time he tried to tell her, something got in the way...
[00:11.52]...Iike cats,Italian guys.
[00:13.59]And finally,Chandler was, like,"Forget about her."
[00:17.00]When Ross was in China,Chandler let it slip that Ross loved Rachel.
[00:21.77]She was,like,"Oh,my God!"
[00:23.84]So she went to the airport to meet him.
[00:26.84]She didn 't know Ross was getting off the plane with another woman.
[00:31.88]That's pretty much everything you need to know.
[00:34.61]But enough about us. How have you been?
[00:37.05]The One With Ross' New Girlfriend
[01:23.36]Flight number 457 from Beijing now arriving.
[01:32.84]Oh,my God!
[01:34.64]Oh,my God!
[01:36.31]Excuse me.
[01:37.34]Move,move,move! Emergency,please!
[01:40.15]Excuse me,excuse me.
[01:50.39]There you are!
[01:54.93]So,so....
[01:57.43]How was China? You!
[02:00.93]It was great.
[02:03.10]What happened?
[02:04.27]-You're bleeding. -I am?
[02:06.00]Oh,look at that! Yes,I am.
[02:08.07]Enough about me, Mr. Back From The Orient!
[02:10.78]Come on,I wanna hear everything! Everything!
[02:16.01]Well,where do I start?
[02:18.75]This is Julie. Julie,this is Rachel.
[02:26.86]These are....
[02:27.93]These are...
[02:29.23]...aren't for you. …
[02:32.10]These are for you.
[02:38.74]Thank you. I'm from New York.
[02:44.44]No problem. We'll use them to stop the bleeding.
[02:50.32]Baggage claim?
[03:02.89]Oh,my God! This is huge!
[03:07.17]This is bigger than huge. This is....
[03:09.63]All right,what's bigger than huge?
[03:13.74]This?
[03:16.27]Guys,you got new haircuts!
[03:22.11]Because,you know,"lf you don't look good,we don't look good."
[03:26.02]I love that voice!
[03:28.59]You guys!
[03:31.12]Airport. Airport. Ross.
[03:34.26]Not alone.
[03:35.49]Julie.
[03:37.13]Arm around her!
[03:39.46]Cramp! Cramp! Cramp!
[03:42.53]I think she's trying to tell us something.
[03:45.30]Quick,get the verbs.
[03:48.01]You! You!
[03:52.18]You!
[03:53.34]You slowpokes!
[04:02.19]This is my sister,Monica.
[04:04.62]This is Chandler.
[04:06.16]Phoebe,hi.
[04:07.49]Joey.
[04:12.23]Julie.
[04:19.50]But I'm not here, you haven't met me.
[04:21.57]I'll make a better impression when I don't have 20 hours of plane on me.
[04:25.74]-And bus. -Oh,my God!
[04:28.15]-With the screaming guy -And the spitting.
[04:30.52]You gotta hear this story.
[04:32.25]We're on this bus that's 200 years old.
[04:34.85]Two hundred,at least.
[04:36.35]And the chicken poops in her lap!
[04:45.40]I'm so sorry.
[04:47.43]I just gave away the ending,didn't l?
[04:49.73]I just heard this story in the cab...
[04:52.34]...and it is all I can think about. …
[04:58.38]This is amazing.
[05:01.35]How did this happen?
[05:02.71]We were in grad school together.
[05:04.58]We haven't seen each other since then. I land in China...
[05:08.09]...guess who's in charge of the dig? …
[05:10.19]Julie!
[05:21.63]It's an expression.
[05:24.57]We just wanted to say a quick hi.
[05:27.04]-Then we'll see the baby. -Then get some sleep.
[05:29.94]It's 6:00 tomorrow night,our time.
[05:32.08]Don't tell us what's gonna happen. I like being surprised.
[05:40.32]Bye!
[05:52.73]-Can I get some coffee? -Sure.
[05:55.60]-Did you talk to him yet? -No.
[05:57.50]Then,no.
[06:11.42]What the hell happened to you in China?
[06:14.15]When last we left you, you were in love with,you know.
[06:17.76]I know I was.
[06:19.16]But there was always this voice inside that kept saying:
[06:22.43]"It's never gonna happen. Move on." You know whose voice that was?
[06:27.33]God?
[06:29.63]It was you,pal.
[06:32.14]Maybe it was God doing me.
[06:35.64]You were right. She looks at me and sees a friend. That's all.
[06:40.18]And then I met Julie...
[06:42.45]...and we're having a great time.
[06:44.55]I never would have gone for it, if it hadn't been for you.
[06:50.29]Well,you owe me one,big guy.
[06:53.36]Your lemonade.
[06:54.69]I didn't order it.
[06:57.53]Then go take that back. They'll charge you for that.
[07:00.90]Go,go,go! Come on,come on!
[07:05.67]So what did you find out?
[07:08.37]He said....
[07:14.68]They're having a great time.
[07:17.15]I'm sorry.
[07:19.68]But the silver lining, if you wanna see it...
[07:22.65]...is that he made this decision all by himself...
[07:26.00]...without any outside help whatsoever.
[07:29.89]How is that a silver lining?
[07:32.40]You have to really wanna see it.
[07:40.74]Ironically,these guys were picked last in gym.
[07:44.68]Hey,Pheebs.
[07:46.38]You know what I'm thinking?
[07:53.05]How...
[07:54.89]...it's been so long since you've had sex...
[07:57.72]...you're wondering if they've changed it?
[08:01.56]No. Although now that's what I'm thinking.
[08:06.53]So what were you thinking?
[08:08.37]You gave the guys great haircuts. I thought you'd like to do mine.
[08:13.57]No.
[08:15.94]Why not?
[08:22.61]No,you're not.
[08:24.32]I know I'm not,but you are.
[08:26.75]I was trying to spare your feelings.
[08:32.79]Hold on.
[08:33.89]Ross,Julie for you.
[08:42.77]Anybody know a good tailor?
[08:44.34]You need clothes altered?
[08:46.00]No,I'm just looking for a man to draw on me with chalk.
[08:50.17]Go see Frankie. My family's been going to him forever.
[08:53.51]He did my first suit when I was 1 5.
[08:55.65]No,wait,1 6.
[08:58.18]No,excuse me,1 5.
[09:07.59]You have to stop the Q-Tip when there's resistance!
[09:20.00]Sweetheart,I'll see you later.
[09:22.01]Okay,bye.
[09:25.64]That is so sweet.
[09:31.55]Okay. No,you hang up.
[09:33.72]No,you
[09:37.00]One,two,three.
[09:42.06]You didn't hang up either.
[09:43.56]She didn't hang up.
[09:50.87]No,you hang up.
[09:52.30]You. You.
[10:03.81]Sorry,I thought you were talking to me.
[10:08.15]Rachel.
[10:09.85]I'll just call her back.
[10:13.19]Hi,sweetie. I'm sorry. We got disconnected.
[10:15.66]No,you hang up.
[10:18.20]How did this happen to me?
[10:19.86]A week ago,two weeks ago,I was fine.
[10:22.93]Ross was just Ross. Just this guy.
[10:25.84]Now all of a sudden,he's Ross...
[10:30.04]...this really great guy that I can't have.
[10:34.45]Sweetie,I wanted you to have him too.
[10:37.08]I know you did.
[10:40.25]I'm just gonna deal with it.
[10:45.92]I gotta get out of here!
[10:51.03]I don't care what you guys say, something's bothering her.
[10:59.74]You know,I think I was 1 6.
[11:04.61]Please,just a little bit off the back.
[11:07.58]I'm still on "no."
[11:11.32]Morning.
[11:13.45]Could you close your eyes for a sec?
[11:15.62]No,no,no. I'm not falling for that again.
[11:21.09]What's going on?
[11:22.16]I sort of did a stupid thing last night.
[11:24.60]What stupid thing did you do?
[11:36.47]Why don't you just go get dressed...
[11:39.01]...then you'll be on your way. Bye-bye.
[11:43.31]How did this happen?
[11:45.28]I kind of ran into him last night.
[11:47.62]-Where? -At his apartment.
[11:49.12]Is this juice?
[11:51.32]And the fact that you dumped him because he hit on Phoebe?
[11:55.29]Oh,God,I know. I'm pathetic,I'm a loser.
[11:59.20]Honey,you're not pathetic. You're just sad.
[12:04.50]My God,if I had a nickel for every guy I wish I hadn't
[12:11.78]But this is about your horrible mistake.
[12:19.22]Sorry we're late.
[12:20.35]We were....
[12:21.82]Well,there was touching.
[12:29.66]Hey,Ross!
[12:32.23]What a....
[12:35.17]What are you doing here?
[12:37.33]I do Raquel!
[12:45.58]So he's back?
[12:47.58]Yeah,he's back. Is that a problem?
[12:50.35]No,not a problem.
[12:52.38]Good. Glad it's not a problem.
[12:55.00]You're gonna have to not touch my ass.
[13:02.26]Despite the yummy bagels and palpable tension...
[13:05.90]... my pants need to be altered.
[13:07.67]When you see Frankie, tell him Joey Tribbiani says hello.
[13:11.44]He'll know what it means.
[13:15.41]You sure he'll crack that code?
[13:19.41]It's funny. The last time Paolo was here,my hair was so much cuter.
[13:24.12]All right.
[13:26.55]But you have to promise that you will not be all controlly and bossy...
[13:31.12]...and all Monica about it.
[13:34.59]I promise.
[13:35.86]All right,let's see.
[13:37.63]Now,some of you are gonna get cut and some of you aren't.
[13:43.03]But I promise,none of you will feel a thing.
[14:02.65]But this isn't the face of a person who trusts a person.
[14:06.39]This is the face of a person who,you know...
[14:09.63]...doesn't trust a person.
[14:12.73]I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
[14:14.60]It's just a little shorter than what we had discussed.
[14:18.44]Would you relax? I know what I am doing.
[14:22.14]This is how he wears it.
[14:26.81]How who wears it?
[14:28.15]Demi Moore.
[14:30.61]Demi Moore is not a "he."
[14:32.62]Well,he was a "he" in Arthur and in 10.
[14:37.49]That's Dudley Moore!
[14:39.26]I said I wanted it like Demi Moore!
[14:43.83]Oh,my God!
[14:45.83]Oh,God!
[14:48.17]Oh,my God! I'm sorry!
[14:50.70]Which one is Demi Moore?
[14:52.37]She's the actress that was in Disclosure,Indecent Proposal,Ghost!
[14:57.34]She's got gorgeous hair.
[14:59.14]I know!
[15:07.89]How long do you want the cuffs?
[15:10.19]At least as long as I have the pants.
[15:16.79]I just got that.
[15:37.31]How is she?
[15:39.58]It's too soon to tell.
[15:42.82]She's resting,which is a good sign.
[15:46.59]How's the hair?
[15:48.06]I'm not gonna lie to you. It doesn't look good.
[15:53.10]I put a clip on one side,which seems to have stopped the curling.
[15:58.07]Can we see her?
[15:59.77]Your hair looks too good. It'd upset her.
[16:03.27]Ross,you come on in.
[16:12.38]Well,how you doing?
[16:14.05]I'm okay.
[16:15.12]That bad,huh?
[16:17.69]Look,I can sense when women are depressed and vulnerable.
[16:21.43]It's one of my gifts.
[16:28.27]Joey,when I saw him get off that plane with her...
[16:32.24]...I really thought I just hit rock bottom.
[16:35.61]But today,it's like there's rock bottom...
[16:39.24]... 50 feet of crap...
[16:41.41]...then me. …
[16:44.15]Tell Ross how you feel.
[16:49.29]What about her? They've only been going out for two weeks.
[16:52.49]Ross has been in love with you for 10 years.
[16:56.46]I don't know. I don't know.
[16:59.26]I've been with my share of women.
[17:02.23]I've been with a lot of people's share of women.
[17:06.14]But the point is...
[17:08.07]... I've never felt about anyone the way Ross felt about you.
[17:14.31]Really?
[17:22.29]Yo,paisan!
[17:26.69]Can I talk to you for a sec?
[17:32.16]Your tailor...
[17:33.93]...is a very bad man!
[17:38.37]What are you talking about?
[17:40.14]Hey,what's going on?
[17:46.94]Joey's tailor...
[17:52.15]...took advantage of me.
[17:56.29]No way! I've been going to the guy for 1 2 years.
[17:59.62]He said he was gonna do my inseam.
[18:01.89]Then he ran his hand up my leg and then there was definite
[18:05.83]What?
[18:07.73]Cupping.
[18:12.34]That's how they do pants!
[18:16.54]First they go up one side, they move it over.
[18:19.34]Then they go up the other side, move it back,then they do the rear.
[18:26.15]Ross,tell him. Isn't that how a tailor measures pants?
[18:29.49]Yes,yes,it is. In prison!
[18:38.70]What's the matter with you?
[18:40.90]What?
[18:45.50]That's not?
[18:52.74]Oh,my God!
[19:01.69]Even Mary Tyler Moore would've been better.
[19:06.69]I like it.
[19:08.56]I do. I think it's a 10!
[19:13.46]Thank you.
[19:14.87]My hair is very amused.
[19:16.60]Come on,things could be worse.
[19:19.70]You could "get caught between the moon and New York City.
[19:24.94]I know it's crazy,but it's true."
[19:29.61]Thank you.
[19:31.32]Well,I gotta go. Bye.
[19:33.78]Bye,Rach!
[19:35.12]Wait,are you leaving?
[19:36.92]That's what I meant by "bye."
[19:39.66]Can I talk to you for a sec?
[19:45.63]When the doctor does that hernia test....
[19:49.43]That's okay.
[19:54.47]What's going on?
[19:57.24]Well,okay,first of all...
[20:01.01]... Paolo and I are not back together.
[20:06.18]If I could go back in time and do it again...
[20:09.52]...well,I wouldn't.
[20:14.49]Second of all....
[20:16.79]What?
[20:20.80]Is this one of those things where you break up with a guy...
[20:24.80]... I tell you what I think...
[20:26.47]...and the next day you get back together with him...
[20:29.14]...and I look like a complete idiot?
[20:33.71]Well,then,I think the guy's scum.
[20:37.11]I hate him. I mean,I actually I physically hate him.
[20:41.89]I always have.
[20:43.32]And you are way too good to be with a guy like that.
[20:48.19]Really?
[20:49.83]You deserve to be with someone who appreciates you...
[20:52.86]...and who gets how funny...
[20:55.03]...and sweet and amazing...
[20:57.80]...and adorable and sexy you are.
[21:01.04]You know? Someone who wakes up every morning thinking:
[21:08.75]You know? Someone who makes you feel good.
[21:11.92]Like the way I do with Julie.
[21:19.72]Was there a "second of all"?
[21:27.86]No,I think that was the whole "all."
[21:33.20]I gotta go.
[21:36.34]Thanks.
[21:45.18]No,I swear to God,Dad!
[21:47.25]That's not how they measure pants!
[21:56.46]I was thinking of doing it shorter, like Andie MacDowell's haircut.
[22:00.23]-Yeah,I could do that. -Really?
[22:02.87]-You wanna do it now? -Great!
[22:07.14]See you.
[22:09.57]I just wanna make really sure this time.
[22:12.48]Andie MacDowell is the girl from Four Weddings and a Funeral,right?
[22:22.59]That's Roddy McDowall.
[22:25.72]Andie MacDowell is the guy from Planet of the Apes.
[22:31.90]-Thank you. -You're welcome.