We are so in luck! 我们走运了
Treeger said we could have all this cool stuff in the basement! 房东说这些好东西都可以给我们
Wait right there. 等一下
Oh,no. I'm paddling away. 不行，我要划走了
Really? We got all this rusty crap for free? 真的？ 这些生锈的垃圾不要钱？
This and a bunch of bubble wrap. And some of it is not even popped. 还有一堆泡泡棉 有些完全没挤过
Could we be more white trash? 我们真是白人垃圾
The One with the Cuffs 本集播出：“爱的手铐”
How desperate am l? 我真是绝望透了
Good thing Chandler's not here. He always wins at this game. 幸好钱德不在，谁也惨不过他
I just told my mom I'd cater her party. 我刚答应帮我妈的宴会办外烩
-How come? -I need the money. 为什么？ 因为我需要钱
It'd be a great way to get rid of that last smidgen of self-respect. 而且这样正好可以抛开 最后一丝自尊
I think this is a good thing. 别这样，这是好事啊
Mom wouldn't have hired you if you weren't good. 要不是觉得你行，妈不会找你
You don't have to stick up for her. She can't hear you. 你不必替她说话，她听不到
Do you have any juice? 你们有果汁吗？
Just pickle. 只有腌黄瓜汁
Funny story. I bumped into Joanna yesterday. 瑞秋，说来好笑 我昨天在路上遇见乔安娜
My boss,Joanna? That must have been awkward. 我的上司乔安娜？一定很尴尬
Actually,she asked me if I wanted a drink. 事实上她找我一起去喝酒
You didn't say yes to that, did you? 你没有答应吧？
没有
Hello,Rachel. 瑞秋
What is she doing here? 她在这里干什么？
Last time you went out with her you said she was a dud! 我不懂 你上次跟她约会时说她很无聊
I judged her too quickly. This time,we took it to the next level. 我太快下定论了 这次我们进展到下一个阶段
Last time I almost got fired. You must end it. You must end it now. 我上次差点被炒鱿鱼 你马上给我做个了结
It's not an everyday occurrence! 这可不是每天都有的事
Usually I'm in there by myself. 通常我都一个人睡
Promise. 答应我…
-Rachel,aren't you running late? -No 瑞秋，你快迟到了吧？ 没有啊
-You are if you pick me up a bagel. -Okay. 有，你还要帮我买焙果 好
Promise you will end this now. 钱德，答应我跟她分手
-I promise. I'll end it. -Thank you. 好，我会跟她分手 谢谢
I hope you know what I'm giving up. 不过我的牺牲很大
She's not just the boss in your office. You know what I mean? 她可不只是你的上司，懂吗？
Sorry. I knew what he meant. 对不起，我懂
How's the hired help? 外烩大厨忙得怎样？
Doing great. Quiches are coming along. 很顺利，乳酪火腿馅饼快好了
What's this? Blue nail polish? 这是什么？蓝色指甲油？
I thought it was cute. 对，我觉得很好看
It's what your grandmother's hands looked like when we found her. 你奶奶死后指甲就是这个颜色
Let me ask you a question. 我问你一个问题
Why did you hire me? 你为什么找我？
Richard raved about the food at his party... 理查一直说他的派对餐点很棒
Then I heard the food at that lesbian wedding was nice. 后来我听说 那场同志婚礼的菜很好
I assume you didn't sleep with anyone there. 你应该没跟那些人睡觉吧
At least that would be something. 起码很特别
Oh,my God! Did you hear that? 天哪！你听到了吗？
She hired me because she thinks I'm good. 她是觉得我很行才找我
I didn't hear that. 我没听到这个
She didn't hire me out of pity. 她不是在可怜我
It wasn't so she could pick on me. She actually thinks I'm good. 不是想在朋友面前刁我 她是真的觉得我行
And hey,it's cool if you're a lesbian. 还有，如果你是同志就太酷了
Good afternoon. Are you the decision-maker of the house? 午安，你是这里的家长吗？
Do you currently own a set of encyclopedias? 你目前拥有一套百科全书吗？
Actually,I'm not buying. I'm selling. 我不是要买，我是要卖
Let me ask you one question. 我问你一个问题
Do your friends ever have a conversation... 你是否曾在朋友们聊天时
...and you just nod along, not sure what they're talking about? 只能跟着点头 却搞不懂他们在说什么？
I think he deserves a Nobel Prize. 我觉得他应该得诺贝尔奖
才怪
It was like the Algonquin kids' table. 很像阿尔冈京族小孩的桌子
Excuse me. I'm sorry. 抱歉，对不起
You haven't said anything for about two minutes. 你发了大约2分半钟的呆
Are you at all interested? 你到底有没有兴趣？
Come on in. 有…请进
-That's weird. -What? 怪了 什么？
Your nails. 你的假指甲
I meant,it's weird that you only have nine now. 我是说你现在只有九个指甲
Oh,my God! 天哪
Wait a minute. 等一下
I had them when I put 我之前要烤…
Oh,my God! It's in the quiche! 天哪，在馅饼里面
-Oh,my God! -Okay,don't panic. 完了！ 好，不要慌
I'll go buy you a new set of nails. 我去帮你买一组新指甲
No one will know, and you'll look great! 没有人会知道，你还是很美
It's because they're going to eat That's the problem. 你是怕他们会吃到
Honey,don't bite your nails. 女儿，别咬指甲
Please don't freak out. 你别发飙
There's a blue fingernail in one of the quiche cups. 不过某个馅饼里有一片假指甲
And there's no way to know which one. 而且无从找起
And whoever finds it wins the prize! 找到的人可以中大奖
I'm not freaking out. 我不会发飙
-Why are you laughing? -Now your father owes me $5. 你在笑什么？ 没事，你爸输我5块钱
You bet I'd lose a nail? 你赌我会掉指甲？
Don't be silly. I just bet that I'd need these. 别傻了 我只是赌我会用上这个
Frozen lasagnas? 冷冻千层面？
You bet that I'd screw up? 你赌我会搞砸？
All that stuff about how I was good 你还说什么我很行…
No,that was all true. 不，那都是真的
This was just in case you "pulled a Monica." 这只是怕你搞摩妮卡飞机
You promised Dr. Weinberg you'd never use that phrase. 你答应心理医生不再这么说
Come on. Have a sense of humor. 拜托，有点幽默感嘛
You're never able to laugh at yourself. 你总是不懂得自嘲
That's right. 是啊
My mom has no faith in me! That's hilarious! 我妈对我没信心，好好笑喔
I don't get it. 哪里好笑？
No. I have faith. 不，我对你有信心
No. You have lasagnas! 不，你有的是千层面
The ruined quiches are ready! 毁掉的馅饼好了
-I really don't think we should be doing this. -Okay. 我们不该这么做 好
It just doesn't feel like we're breaking up. 这种感觉不像是分手
No,we are. I'm sad. 是分手啊，我好伤心喔
好吧
Can you wait till tomorrow? All right. 可以等到明天吗？好吧
Unbelievable! 真是帅呆了
Thanks. 谢谢
That was my boss. I have to go. 不是，我得去见我的老板 好
What are you doing? 你干什么？
-I'm getting dressed. -Why? 穿衣服 为什么？
When I walk outside naked, people throw garbage. 光着走在路上会被扔东西
Wait. I want to show you something. 等一下，给你看个东西
What is it? 什么东西？
Just a little gag gift somebody gave me. 别人送的一个小道具
Put your hands together. 把手合在一起
You're not the boss of me. 你又不是我的老板
Yeah,you are. 你是
Saucy! 粉辣喔
I'll be back in two minutes. 我马上回来
You're going to leave me like this? 你要这样把我挂着？
Knowing you're here waiting for me. I think it's exciting,don't you? 知道你在等我 感觉很令人兴奋
If you don't come back soon... 好，但要是你不马上回来…
...there's pretty much nothing I can do about it! 我也不能怎么样
Great. I'll keep it in my butt with your nose. 很好，我会把它帖着
That's weird. She locked the door. 奇怪，她把门锁上了
You know why? She's got the bonus list in there. 你知道为什么？ 里面有圣诞奖金名单
I saw her working on it today. 我早上看到她在打
Swear you won't tell. 好，你可别说出去
You want to see the list? 你想看名单吗？ 想
How are you? 你好吗？
Hello,Joanna 喂，乔安娜…
office. …办公室
I'm sorry. I'll be a little longer. 对不起，我还要一阵子
-How little? -A couple hours. 多久？ 2个小时，我急死了
This isn't funny. Get back here now! 一点也不好玩，马上给我回来
-I can't! -Why not? 我没办法 为什么？
I'm in my boss' car. 我在我老板的车上
-What? -Tunnel! 什么？ 进隧道了
What? 怎样？
Rachel,could I see you for a moment? 瑞秋，你进来一下
Okay,here's the situation. 好，现在是这样
The keys to the cuffs are on the door. 手铐的钥匙挂在门上
Could you be a doll... 你能不能行行好
...and grab them and scoot on over here and unlock me? 拿了钥匙冲过来帮我解套？
And on a totally separate subject, that's a lovely pantsuit. 题外话：好漂亮的套装
You promised you would break up with her. 你答应要跟她分手的
I did break up with her! She just took it really,really well! 我跟她分手啦 只不过她分得很狂野
Jeopardizing my career never entered your mind? 你都没想过 这样会破坏我的事业？
It did enter my mind. 我想过啊
But then something happened that made it shoot right out. 但后来的事让这个念头飞了
You got yourself into those cuffs, you get yourself out. 你害自己被铐住，就自己脱困
I can't get myself right out of them. 不，我没办法自己脱困
You must have me confused with the "Amazing Chandler"! 你把我跟脱逃大师钱德搞混了
All right! This is it! 钱德！好，够了
Never see her again. 不准你再见她
Never! 永远
Give me back my Walkman! 把随身听还给我 我…
I never borrowed it. 我没借过
Then I lost it. Buy me one! 那就是我弄丢了，买一台给我
Does it hurt? 会痛吗？
No,I always see guys do this when handcuffs are taken off. 我只是看别人都会哀一声
Hello,sweet pants! 亲爱的裤子
Wait! What will you tell Joanna? 慢着！你要怎么跟乔安娜说？
About what? 说什么？
She'll see you're gone and know I let you out,and I'll get fired! 她看你走了会知道是我放的 我会被解雇
I'll tell a lie! I'm good at lying! 我会撒谎，我最会撒谎了
I actually did borrow your Walkman! 我的确借了你的随身听
She'll know I have a key to her office. 行不通的，她会知道我有钥匙
I've got to lock you back up. 我得把你铐回去
I don't think so. 你别想
This is much better. 这样好多了
Here's somebody interesting. 这个人很有意思
What do you know about Van Gogh? 你对梵谷认识多少？
-He cut off his ear. -And? 他割掉自己的耳朵 还有呢？
I'm out. 没了
He painted that. 这是他画的
That's pretty nice. 不赖嘛
I thought he cut off his ear because he sucked. 我以为他是罚自己画不好
-What else you got in there? -Let's see.... 还有什么？ 我看看
-Where does the Pope live? -ln the woods. 教宗住在哪里？ 森林里
Wait,that's the joke answer. 等等，那是开玩笑的
Actually,it's Vatican City. 他住在梵蒂冈
Now,what do you know about vulcanized rubber? 你知道什么是硫化橡胶？ （另义保险套）
Spock's birth control. 节育用品
You need these books. 你需要这套书
This used to be your room? 这里是你的旧房间？
You must have been in really good shape as a kid. 你小时候一定很健美
I'm such an idiot! 我真是个白痴
I can't believe I thought she could change. 我居然以为她会改变
Who cares what your mom thinks? 谁管你娘怎么想？
So you "pulled a Monica." 搞摩妮卡飞机又怎样
I'm glad that's catching on. 这句话还真流行
Why does that have to be a bad thing? Just change what it means. 谁说这一定要是坏话？ 去改变它的意义
Prove your mother wrong. 去证明你妈是错的
You finish the job,and we'll call that "pulling a Monica." 你把工作顺利完成 我们就管它叫搞摩妮卡飞机
What? 什么？
If a kid gets straight A's, his parents say,"You pulled a Monica." 小孩每一科都拿A， 父母会说 “你搞了摩妮卡飞机”
A fireman saves a baby, and they go,"He pulled a Monica." 消防员救出一个宝宝 大家会说“他搞摩妮卡飞机”
Someone hits a homer,and they say, "That one's out of here." 有人打全垒打，播报员会说 “这是一支红不让”
Because some things don't change. 有些事是不会变的
All right. I'll go down there. 好，我要下楼去
I won't serve the lasagna. I'll serve what I make. 我不上千层面 我要上我做的菜
My breasts are really strong. 我的真有力
I have to get you locked back up. I'm so going to lose my job! 钱德，拜托，我得把你铐回去 我的饭碗快不保了
She's very private about her office! 她很在意办公室的隐私权
Now I know why! 我总算知道原因了
You're in trouble either way. 你不管怎样都有麻烦
If she sees me locked to this... 她看见我被铐在柜子上
...she'll know you were here. You might as well let me go. 就会知道你进来过 你还不如让我走
-I'll clean your bathroom for a month. -Still won't be clean. 我帮你洗浴室1个月 还是洗不干净
All I want is my freedom. 我只要我的自由
-Foot rubs for a month! -Freedom! 揉脚1个月 自由
Why won't you hear me! Sophie,help me! 你为什么不听 苏菲，救救我
Sophie,sit! 苏菲，坐下
自由
Would you just calm down?! 请你冷静好吗
I'm going to say this for the last time. 我再说最后一次
Would you please just 能不能请你…
There's a lot I didn't know about vomit. 我对呕吐的了解还真少
In a minute. 等一下
So what do you say? 你觉得如何？
You get the whole set of encyclopedias for $1200. 1200元拥有整套百科全书
That works out to just 50 bucks a book. 平均一本才50元
$1200? 1200？
You think I have $1200? 你觉得我有1200吗？
I'm home during the day... 我大白天窝在家里
...and I got patio furniture in my living room. 还用凉椅洋伞当家具
There's a few things you don't get from book learning. 有些事是书上学不到的
Well,what can you swing? 你能凑出多少？
How about zero down and zero a month for a long,long time? 0头期款，月付0元如何？
You don't have anything? 你什么都没有？
You want to see what I got? 你想看我有什么？好
I got a baby Tootsie Roll... 我有一个巧克力棒
...a movie stub,keys,a Kleenex... 一张电影票根、钥匙、面纸
...a rock... 一块小石头
Okay,I get the picture. Thanks for your time. 好，我懂了，耽误你了
And a fifty. 和一张50元
These must be Chandler's pants. 这一定是钱德的裤子
For $50 you can get one book. 50元可以买一本
What will it be? A? B? C? 你要哪一本？A？B？C？
I'll stick with the V. 我还是买V好了
I want to see how this bad boy turns out. 我想看看结局如何
I will buy and wrap all of your Christmas gifts! 我帮你买和包圣诞礼物
I'll squeeze you fresh orange juice every morning! 我每天早上帮你榨柳橙汁
-With extra pulp? -Yeah. 有果肉？ 有
不要
I've got it! 我知道了
You don't have it. 你才不知道
I have so got it! 我完全知道了
There will be rumors about this. No way to stop it. 这件事会传出去，挡也挡不住
Sophie,Monica and Phoebe know. 苏菲知道 摩妮卡、菲比知道
-How do they know? -I called them. 她们怎么会知道？ 我打给她们了
When they ask me what I saw... 当她们问我看到什么
...I can be very generous... 我可以很大方
...or very stingy. 也可以很小气
Go on. 说下去
I can make you a legend. 我可以让你成为传奇
I can make you this generation's Milton Berle. 我可以让你成为现代唐璜
-And Milton Berle has -Not compared to you. 而唐璜… 根本比不上你
They're not even touching the lasagna. 怎样？ 客人碰都没碰千层面
They love your casserole! 真的？ 他们好喜欢你的砂锅
Everyone seems to like your dish. 大家都很喜欢你做的菜
And you? 那你呢？
I thought it was... 我觉得…
...quite tasty. 很好吃
So if everyone liked it, and you liked it... 要是大家都喜欢，你也喜欢
...that would make this a success. Which would make you.... 那就代表很成功，而你就是…
A bitch? 恶婆娘？
I meant "wrong," but we can use your word. 我想说“你就错了” 但你的说法也行
Yes,well,I was wrong. 对，我错了
And I have to say... 我必须要说
...you really impressed me today. 你让我大开眼界
You might even say that she "pulled a Monica." 你还可以说她搞了摩妮卡飞机
She doesn't know we switched it. 她不知道我们改过了
And the next time you cater for me... 下次你帮我办外烩
...there will be nothing but ice in the freezer. 冷冻库里只会有冰
That really means a lot. 这是很大的鼓励
Mom,don't bite your nails! 妈，别咬指甲
（中央咖啡馆）
Hello,Chandler. 钱德你好啊
I love you. 我爱你
What's going on? 怎么回事？
No,he doesn't! 少来了
Two hours,that lasted. 拖了2小时
So did you break up with Joanna? 所以你跟乔安娜分手了吗？
I think so. 应该是吧
It's good you got out, before she blew up like Vesuvius. 幸好她跟维苏威一样爆炸之前 你就闪了
The volcano? 那座火山？
Speaking of volcanoes,man,are they a violent igneous rock formation! 对，讲到火山 那些火成岩还真暴力
What? 什么？
Lava spewing,hot ash. 熔岩乱喷，热灰乱飞
Of course,some are dormant. 不过有些是休眠火山
Why are you talking about volcanoes all of a sudden? 你怎么突然聊起火山来了？
What do you want to talk about? Vivisection? 你们想聊什么？活体解剖？
The vas deferens? 输精管？
The Vietnam War? 越战？
Did anyone see that documentary on the Korean War? 有人看那部韩战纪录片吗？
Korea's a beautiful country. 韩国那么美
With such a sad history. 命运却好悲惨
Could there be more Kims? 有好多姓金的
-Who's out there? -Me! Good morning! 外面是谁？ 是我，早安
Could you come in here,please? 瑞秋，你能不能进来一下？
Sure! They didn't have poppyseed bagels... 好 没有罂粟籽焙果了
...so I have sesame Oh,my word! 所以我买芝麻…天哪
I've had a slight office mishap. 我出了一点办公室灾难
Could you get the key for me? 请把门后的钥匙拿给我 好
-lf you could. -Oh,I'm sorry! 麻烦你 对不起
You can tell your friend Chandler we're definitely broken up this time! 告诉你的朋友钱德 我们这次绝对是分手了