Wow! You look nice. What's the occasion? 穿这么帅要去哪里？
Monica and I are celebrating our 10-month anniversary. 摩妮卡和我要庆祝满十个月
Got reservations at Jean-George. 我们在乔治法国餐厅订了位置
How'd you get in? 你们怎么进得去？
Made a few calls, pulled some strings... 打了几通电话，动用一些关系
...and they'll seat us if we both have chicken and don't get dessert. 如果我们都吃鸡，不叫甜点 就让我们11：30进去吃
-Hi,Chandler. -Hey,Caitlin. 钱德 凯特琳
Somebody got a haircut. 新发型喔
I hate it. I look like an 8-year-old boy. 我恨死了，活像八岁小男孩
If that was true, gym class would've been more interesting. 如果真的是这样 那以前上体育课会有趣许多
-It's $27 even. -Okay. Here you go. 正好27美元 好，给你
Where's the chicken? 你养的鸡呢？
It's in the back. The duck pissed him off. 在后头，被这鸭子气跑了
He said that eggs came first. 鸭子说先有蛋，才有鸡
-Thanks. I'll see you later. -Bye. 谢了，下回见 好，再见
What the hell was that? 你那样算是什么？
-What? -The flirting. 什么？ 打情骂俏
Aren't you supposed to be going out with, let's see, my sister? 你不是正要去… 跟谁来着… 我妹妹约会？
I wasn't flirting. 我没在打情骂俏啊
It was totally flirting! "Somebody got a haircut...." 那根本就是打情骂俏 “新发型喔”
First of all, the impression? Uncanny. 好，第一件事 你模仿得很蹩脚
Second, that wasn't flirting. That was just casual conversation. 第二，那不是打情骂俏 只是两个人闲话家常而已
Yeah, right. 我听你在说
You wanna see flirting? I'll show you. 你要看打情骂俏？ 我示范给你看
I'm good. 不用了
The One Where Ross Can't Flirt 本集播出：“调情逊手”

I am so proud of Joey. 我真替乔伊感到骄傲
-He's gonna be on Law and Order! -I know. 他竟然要演“法网游龙” 我知道
Don't you think it should be called Order and Law? 可是你不觉得 叫“网法游龙”比较对吗？
No,because they arrest the guy and then try him. 不对，得先有法律才能去网啊
Don't get me started on that. 我话匣子一开可就没完了
-I was not flirting. -And on your anniversary. For shame! 我没在打情骂俏 还在纪念日当天，丢脸！
What's going on? 怎么了？
He was hitting on the hot delivery girl. 钱德跟外送辣妹打情骂俏
I was not. And oh, God! 我才没有，拜托你也小声点
You were. If anyone should be hitting on her... 有就是有 而且就算有谁跟要她搭讪
...it's the guy who's single... 也应该是单身的男人
...the guy who can do something about it. 也应该是有搞头的人嘛
Sounds like someone wants to be Mr. Pizza Delivery Girl. 看来有人想把比萨外送妹了
Is that what this is about? You like Caitlin? 原来是这样？你喜欢凯特琳？
Ross, we broke up two years ago. You've been married since then. 罗斯，我们分手都两年了  中间你还结过婚
I think it's okay that we see other people. 我们各自约会应该没问题吧
I was watching her at the pizza place. 我前几天在比萨店看到她
And she was just so sexy and funny and has the cutest little 她性感又风趣… 还有小巧可爱的…
We don't need her measurements. 三围不用说了
Pepperoni,pepperoni,pepperoni. 三个都是意大利腊肠比萨
She's pretty and you love her, but is she stupid? 罗斯，我知道她人美你又爱 但她是不是蠢了点？
She forgot my vegetarian. 她忘了我点的素食比萨
This is perfect. She'll have to come back here with your pizza. 太完美了 她一定会回来送你的素食比萨
And when she does, I will turn on the charm "au" Ross. 到时我就展现出罗斯的魅力
I am so glad you don't eat meat. 我真高兴你不吃肉
See? Vegetarianism benefits everyone. 看吧，吃素对大家都好
Hey,everybody,look who's here! You remember my grandmother. 大家看是谁来了 还记得我祖母吗？
-Big night! -Yeah,it's so cool. 太酷了
Joey on Law and Order. You must be proud. 乔伊参与“法网游龙”演出 你一定很骄傲吧
She doesn't understand a word of English. 钱德，她完全听不懂英文
I thought you were Joey's other grandmother. 抱歉，我以为你是乔伊的阿妈
I've done it again. 我还猛说英文
Nonnie's my biggest fan. 她是我的头号影迷
She's the only one in the family who's always believed in me. 家族里只有她一个 从头到尾都相信我
Si. Big star. 对，他是大明星
My big fat Joey star. 我的胖胖乔伊大明星
Yeah,I weighed,like, 27 pounds when I was born. 对，我出生是27磅，所以…
-Happy anniversary! -Happy anniversary,10 months. 纪念日快乐 十个月纪念日快乐
In the shower I was thinking about our first night in London. 我刚才在淋浴的时候 想起我们在伦敦的第一晚
Joey's grandmother's right there. 乔伊的祖母来了
-The one who speaks English? -The one who doesn't. 会说英文的还是不会的那个？ 不会的那个
That was some hot love you gave me. 那晚你给的爱还真是火热
-I'll get ready. -Wear those earrings I got you. 我去准备一下 不如戴我送你的耳环？
That's a great idea. I was saving them for something special. 好主意，就是要留到特别场合 好
-You've got to go home. -But I like it here. 你得回家去 但是我喜欢这里啊
Get the earrings you borrowed. He wants me to wear them. 你得回家拿我借你的耳环 钱德要我今晚戴那副耳环
I think they're in my purse. Go get dressed and I'll look for them. 好，应该是放在我皮包里 你去穿衣服，我去找 好
I need those earrings you borrowed. 瑞秋，我要拿回我借你的耳环
Yeah,I'll be right back. 好，我马上回来
Phoebe,you speak ltalian? 菲比，你会说意大利文？
I guess so. 我猜是吧
-Here you go. -Thanks. Where's the other one? 来，谢谢你 等等 另外一个呢？
Oh,what, you want both of them? That's a little greedy, don't you think? 你两个都要？ 会不会太贪心了？
Rachel Karen Greene, where's the other one? 瑞秋葛林，另一个耳环呢？
Look, just don't freak out, but I kind of lost it. 好啦，你先别生气 好像不见了
I know it's in the apartment, but I definitely lost it. 还在公寓里，但一定不见了
What'll I tell Monica? She wants to wear them tonight. 那我要怎么跟摩妮卡说？ 她今晚就要戴
-Tell her to wear her own earrings. -These are her earrings. 叫她戴自己的耳环 这就是她的耳环
不会吧…
You lent me her earrings? I'm not allowed to borrow her stuff! 你把摩妮卡的耳环借我？ 我不能借她的东西耶
-Why not? -Because I lose her stuff! 为什么？ 因为我都会弄丢
You see that blind guy? I'm gonna bash his head in later. 看到那个盲人没？ 我等一下会痛打他一顿
My big scene's coming up. The big scene coming up. 我的主戏就快来了 主戏就快来了
If you said, "Big lima bean bubbling up," would she know the difference? 若你说“吃葡萄不吐葡萄皮” 她会不会比较懂？
What are you doing? 瑞秋，你在干嘛？
Oh, I just can't watch. It's too scary. 我不敢看，太恐怖了
It's a diaper commercial. 现在是卖尿布的广告
Yeah,well,you know me. Babies,responsibilities.... 你也知道我的 小孩啊，责任，吓死人
-Pizza delivery. -I'll get it! I will get that! 比萨外送 我来开 我来拿
How does my hair look? 我的发型如何？
Ross,it hasn't moved since 1996. 罗斯，你从96年就没变过了
One vegetarian pizza. It's 12.50. 一个素食比萨 12.5美元
By the way,if it makes you feel any better... 对了，如果这会让你好过些
...I happen to like 8-year-old boys. 我正好很喜欢八岁男孩
What? 什么？
Your hair. Before. Your hair. 你的头发 之前你说过
You said you thought your hair looked like an 8-year-old boy's... 你的发型很像八岁男孩
...and I'm just saying I like it. 我说我很喜欢…
The hair. 你的发型
Thanks. 谢谢
You understand,I don't actually like 8-year-old boys. 我不是真的喜欢八岁男孩
All I'm looking for is the money. 我在等你找钱
Here you go. Stop bringing us pizzas,you. 这里 别再帮我们送比萨了
I'm gonna try. 我都快哭了
You're welcome. 不客气
You couldn't let me have her, could you? 你就是不想看我得手，对吧？
This is a girl I really like, and you had to swoop in there! 什么？我真的很喜欢这个女孩 你干嘛要来凑热闹？
What? 怎么了？
Chandler was flirting with the hot delivery girl. 钱德冲着外送辣妹打情骂俏
Thank you for that. 真是多谢你了
I was not flirting. 我没有打情骂俏
It's okay. I don't care. That's fine. 没关系，我不在意，无所谓
Really? 什么？ 真的？
It's no big deal. I do it all the time. 小事一件，我动不动也是
You flirt with guys all the time? 你动不动就跟人打情骂俏？
It doesn't mean anything. Just like it doesn't mean anything with you. 是啊，那又不代表什么 你不是也没别的意思
There's a difference. You're a lot hotter. 对，但是有一点很不一样 你比我辣多了
True story. 这是真的
This actually bothers you? 钱德，你真的介意？
Yes, and I think it'd bother a lot of people. 对，我是介意 我想很多人都会介意
When you and Ross dated... 瑞秋，你和罗斯在一起那时
...did it bother you when he flirted with other women? 他跟别的女人打情骂俏 你会不会介意？
No,it bothered me when he slept with other women. 不会…他跟别的女人上床 我才会介意
And thank you for that. 真是多谢了
I never had to worry. 但其实我没啥好担心的
He was never good at the flirting thing. 罗斯从来就不太会打情骂俏
What? 什么？…
What are you talking about? It worked with you. 你在说什么？对你不就有效
No, you're right. 你说的真是对极了
We met,you flirted and then bam! Nine years later, you had me. 我们认识，你对我打情骂俏 九年后你终于追到我了
All right. 好…
You know what I'll do? I'll order another pizza. 就这么办 我再来点个比萨
And when Caitlin gets here... 等凯特琳来的时候
...I will show you how well I flirt. 我就来让你们见识一下 我有多会打情骂俏
I will get her phone number. 我还能要到她的电话号码
And not the one on the menu. 不是比萨店的电话啦
-I found it. -Thank God! Where was it? 我找到了 谢天谢地，在哪里找到的？
On your dresser. 在你的梳妆台上
Okay, that is the one we already have. 那是原来的那一个
Here's my big scene. My big scene's here. 我的主戏到了，就是现在
-Wanna bet nobody heard anything? -No bet.
Anybody home? 有人在吗？
-Oh,my God. -What? 天啊 干嘛？
Everybody keep smiling. It'll kill my grandmother if she finds out. 大家继续笑 我祖母发现一定会难过到死掉
What is it? 怎么了？
They cut me out of the show. 我那一段被剪掉了
What? 什么？
-Are you sure? -Maybe your scene's coming up. 你确定？ 或许现在才轮到你上
Not likely. Because you see that body bag right there? 不太可能 看到那个装尸体的袋子没？
I'm in it. 有啊 里头装的是我
This is terrible. What'll you do? 太糟糕了，你要怎么办？
I don't know. This little old lady lives for my career. 不知道 我的老祖母活着 就是为了看我演戏
When they dumped me off Days of Our Lives,she almost died. 上回“我们的日子”不要我 她差点难过到死掉
That's not good. 那样很不妙
-Yeah,we had to get her a home nurse. -Oh,my God. 我们还找了个特别看护来照顾她 天啊
Yeah, she almost died and got really expensive. 她差点死掉 还花了我们好多钱
You're not smiling. Not that face! Everybody smile! 别用那种表情，大家继续笑…
Just tell her what happened. It's not your fault. 乔伊，你怎么不实话实说？ 那又不能怪你
If we keep talking this way, won't we freak her out soon? 如果我们继续这样说话 会不会吓到她？
Soon. I'm gonna be on soon. 很快…马上就轮我上场了
There I am! 那就是我！
Sam Waterston! 山姆瓦特斯顿！
No,no. That's me. That's me! 不对…那是我…
No. Sam Waterston. 不是，那是山姆瓦特斯顿
Crime Misdemeanor, Capricorn One. “爱与罪” “摩羯一号大行动”
She doesn't know "hello," but she knows Capricorn One. 她听不懂“你好” 却知道“摩羯一号大行动”
I need those earrings. We're leaving when the show's over. 菲比，我要那副耳环了 节目一演完我们就要出去
But I already gave them back to you. 可是我已经还你了啊
No,you didn't. 才没有
I already didn't gave them back to you. That's what I said. 好，我已经还没还给你 我就是这样说的啊
Where's that other earring? 另一个耳环在哪里？
It's not here,Phoebe. It's not here. 菲比，不在这里…
I went to Chandler's last night. 我昨晚有去钱德和乔伊那里
Make sure you check Chandler's jewelry box. 好，记得要检查钱德的珠宝盒
Chandler has a jewelry box? 慢着，钱德有珠宝盒？
We have 10 minutes. Do you want me to get into that now? 好了，时间紧迫 你要我现在就跟你解释？
Hey,Phoebe. 菲比
How's that... 那个...
...vegetarian pizza working out for you? 素食比萨… 你吃得还习惯吗？
You and those vegetables have a real... 你和那些蔬菜
...thing going on,huh? 还真是有两下子，是吧？
Why are you being weird? 你干嘛怪里怪气的？
Do you like it? 你喜不喜欢？
No. That'd be, "Why are you being cute?" 不喜欢，否则我就会问 “你干嘛装可爱”了
Okay. I'm working on my flirting. 好吧，我在练习打情骂俏
I did not get that. 原来如此，我没看出来
So, Monica, do you like Law and Order? 摩妮卡，你喜欢看 “法网游龙”吗？
Yeah,it's good. 喜欢，很好看
I found out all this stuff about you. You like Law and Order... 我今天发现到了新的你 好比你爱看“法网游龙”
...and you've flirted with every guy in the tri-state area. 还有你到处跟人打情骂俏
Okay,let me get this straight. 好，我来问个清楚
It's okay for you to flirt, but not for me? 你可以打情骂俏，我却不行
I'm glad we cleared that up. 真高兴我们把话说清楚了
I'm sorry, but some things are different for men and women. 抱歉，但你听我说 男女有些事是不一样的
Teach me about men and women. 继续，开释我一些男女的差别
I've already taught you so much already, but whatever. 好，虽然我已经教过你很多了
When you flirt with a guy, you think,"No big deal." 你跟男人打情骂俏的时候 你觉得只是打情骂俏 没啥大不了的
But he thinks,"Finally! Somebody who wants to sleep with me." 但对方会觉得 他终于找到人上床了
-No way! -It's true. 不可能 这是真的
-Well,that's pathetic. -Again,true. 真可悲 这也是真的
-This goes for all guys? -All guys that are awake. 男人都这样吗？ 醒着的男人都适用
We go to sleep. 等我们上床睡觉后
All guys from the other end of the world wake up and act the same way. 世界另一边的男人起床 继续做一模一样的事
It's another commercial and I still haven't told her. 好，又进广告了 我还是没跟她说
Joey,this is the last commercial. 乔伊，这是最后一段广告
-You got 10 minutes left. -I know! 你只剩十分钟了 我知道…
What am I gonna do? 你要我怎么办？
You will not run out and leave her here. 不许你落跑，留她在这里
Yeah,all right. 对，好啦
乔伊？
Joey's gonna be right back. Right back? 乔伊马上回来 马上回来？
Meanwhile,let's talk about you. 我们顺便来聊聊你吧
So you're old and small. 你年纪大，个子小
-Did you find it? -The earring,no. 找到没？ 耳环是没有
But I found my sunglasses. 但我在沙发底下 找到我的太阳眼镜
I've been looking for these since last summer. 我从去年夏天找到现在
Those are mine. You borrowed them from me. 那是我借你的太阳眼镜
Okay. Calm down. Here they are. 好，别激动，还你就是了
菲比
-What do we do? -I don't know. I don't know! 我们要怎么办？ 我不知道…
We'll just have to tell Monica,that's all. 我们只好老实跟摩妮卡说了
Oh,God! She's gonna kill me. 老天，她一定会杀了我
I could tell her it was all my fault. 我可以跟她说是我弄掉的
Oh,that'd be great. 那就太好了
Mon, could I talk to you? 摩妮卡，我有话要跟你说
Yeah. What is it? 好，什么事？
I lost one of your earrings. 我弄丢了你一支耳环
I'm sorry. I am so,so sorry. 对不起，我真的很抱歉
All right,what can you do? If you lost it, you lost it. 好吧，都弄丢了还能怎样
I'll replace it. I promise. I feel so terrible. 我保证会赔你一副新的 我真的很愧疚
That's fine. You didn't do it on purpose. 没关系，你又不是故意的
Look at you. Come here. 瞧你难过的，来
-You feel better? -Yeah. You're the best. 好点了没？ 有啊，你最棒了
Okay, wait a minute. 好，等一等
I can't do this. 我不能这样
Listen, honey, it's not Phoebe's fault. 其实不是菲比弄丢的
She lent me the earrings. 她把你的耳环借我
I lost it. I'm so sorry,honey. I feel terrible too. 是我弄丢的，我真的很抱歉 我也觉得好愧疚
That is exactly why I do not lend you stuff! 所以我才不借你东西！
First,my jewelry. If it's not that,it's my sweater. 先是我的首饰 不是首饰，就是我的蓝色毛衣
And if it's not that, it's my sunglasses. 不是蓝色毛衣 就是我的太阳眼镜
-Your sunglasses? -Yes！ 你的太阳眼镜？ 对！
Oh,right. 对耶
-Pizza. -Mine,mine,mine! 比萨外送 我的！…
Okay,here goes. 好，要开始了
Prepare yourselves for some class-A flirting. 准备见识一流的打情骂俏
Okay,hold on. 等等…
Okay. 我准备好了
You have nothing to prove.And if you really like this girl, I don't think flirting is the right way 你犯不着这样 若你真的喜欢这个女孩 我也不觉得打情骂俏是…
You'll see. Okay. 等着看就知道，好吧
What's her name? 她叫什么名字？
Caitlin! 凯特琳…
We can't keep eating like this. 这样吃下去也不是办法
It's $12.50. 12.5美元
Okay. 好
Do you make the pizzas in one of those wood-burning ovens? 你们做比萨 是用烧木头的炉子吗？
No,actually,I think they're gas. 不是，其实是瓦斯炉
Gas? 瓦斯炉？
Intense. 真带劲
If this is how all the Gellers flirt, we don't have a problem. 如果盖勒家的人 都这样打情骂俏的话 我们就没有问题了
You know that smell gas has? 你知道瓦斯的味道吗？
-Yeah. -They put that in. 知道 那是加进去的
-What? -The gas is odorless. 什么？ 瓦斯其实是无色无味
But they add the smell so you know when there's a leak. 加上味道是为了让人 在瓦斯漏气时能闻得出来
Well,okay. 好吧
A lot of other gas smells. 很多气体都有味道…
Oh,the humanity! 救命喔
Methane smells.... 甲烷有味道…
You know what? Actually, I really should go. 不好意思，我真的得走了
-But I haven't paid you yet. -That's okay. 我还没付钱呢 没关系
You guys have ordered so many that this one's on me. 你们点了那么多 这一个算我请的
Was I talking to her about gas? 我是不是跟她说到瓦斯的事？
More so than anything else. 那根本就是主题
I found it interesting. 我觉得很有意思
I'm sorry. No. 我很遗憾 不用…
Don't worry about it. 别担心
In nine years,she and l will be right there! 九年之后 我和她就能在一起了
I'm gonna clear out some of these boxes. 好，我去清掉这些比萨盒
-Ross? -Yeah? -What else do they add smell to? 罗斯？ 怎么了？ 还有哪些气体会加味道？
Caitlin! Caitlin!
Hi,I'm Rachel. 我是瑞秋
From upstairs? The ones with all the pizza? 住楼上的 叫一堆比萨的那家
Was there a problem? 比萨有问题吗？
No,they're fine. Great pizza. 不是…比萨很好吃
But,actually,my friend Ross... 其实是我朋友罗斯的事
...he gets nervous when he's flirting. 他只要打情骂俏就会紧张
Oh,my God! 天啊
-That was flirting? -Yeah. 他是在打情骂俏？ 没错
I know,I know. 我知道你的感觉…
I'm telling you, once you get past that part... 不过一旦过了那个阶段
...where it feels like you wanna die... 那个让你想要自杀的阶段
...he's a really good person. 你就会发现他是个大好人
The guy with the gas? 开口闭口都是瓦斯的那个人？
I'm telling you,he's really sweet and really funny... 他真的很体贴风趣
...and he's just got a good heart. 还有一副好心肠
You know,actually,I did think that he was cute and then he started talking. 其实我觉得他蛮可爱的 可是一开始说话就…
See,there you go. 这就对了…
-Besides, I think he really likes you. -Really? 而且我觉得他很喜欢你 真的吗？
Well,we have seven people and 10 pizzas. What do you think? 我们七个人，却叫了十个比萨 这还不够明显吗？
I thought Joey was there. 我想说乔伊很会吃
Yeah, no, but just I'm telling you he's worth a shot. 罗斯值得你去试试看
Well, if he's so great why don't you go out with him? 如果他那么棒 你怎么不去跟他约会？
Well,you know,at some point... 你知道吗？ 有朝一日...
...you and I may need to have a longer conversation. ...我们可能需要好好聊一聊
Hey, Ross? 罗斯？
I just ran into Caitlin in the hallway. 我刚才在走廊遇到凯特琳
You must be getting better at this flirting stuff than I thought. 你打情骂俏的技巧 肯定比我想像中更高明
-What? -I don't get it,but she wanted me... 什么意思？ 虽然我搞不懂
...to give you her number. 但她要我转交她的电话给你
And she just gave you this? 她自己给你的？
Rach, thanks. But I don't need you doing me any favors. 瑞秋，谢了 但我不需要你帮忙
I didn't. She thought you were cute. 我没帮忙啊，是她觉得你可爱
Well,that I can believe. 这点我倒是相信
Hey,is the show still on? 还在演吗？
Almost over,man. 快要演完了
Hey,Nonnie.
Is that the pope? 那是教宗吗？
Why am I looking? 我干嘛跟过去看？
Oh, here I am! This is my big scene. 来了，我的主戏上场
All right, back off! 快退后
I got a gun! 我有枪喔
I'm not afraid to use it. 用起来可不会手软
-Joey! That's right, Nonnie. 乔伊！
You couldn't have at least changed your shirt? 你起码也该换一件上衣的
Now, I want a suitcase filled with $ 100,000 我要你在手提箱里 装满十万美元…
Filled with $ 100,000 in small bills. 装满十万美元的小钞
And if I don't get Shoo! 若是我没拿到…
And if I don't get it... 若是我没拿到…
...I'll shoot this duck! 我就毙了这支鸭子
Oh,no! 不能这样
I'm coming out! 我要出去了
And she's supposed to buy this? 她会相信吗？
Joey, bravo! 乔伊，太棒了！…
Ground control to Major Tom 地面控制队呼叫总部…
Commencing countdown 倒数开始…
Engines 动力…
On 全开
That's scenes from next week's show. Next week. 这是下周的片段…下周的
I am definitely gonna watch that. 我一定要等着看
Do these look the same? 这一副呢？看起来一样吗？
-Definitely. -Not as each other. 一模一样 是分开来看
Then,no. 不 那就不一样了
-Hey,you ready? -Yeah. 准备好了么？ 好了
You look amazing. I'm the luckiest man in the world. 你真美 我是全世界最幸运的男人
You're about to get a little luckier. 你即将要更幸运了
-Let me see the earrings. -Right,the earrings. 耳环让我看看 耳环…
They look great. 美极了
Does your boyfriend have the best taste or what? 你男友真是品味一流呢
My boyfriend really does have great taste. 我男友的品味真的很棒
Thanks for picking out the earrings. 多谢你帮我选耳环