Hey, guys. 大家好
So, what do you think? 你们觉得怎么样？
-About what? -What? -你是指什么？ -什么？
Are you kidding? Okay,I'll give you a hint. 你在开玩笑吗？ 好吧，我给你们一个提示
Eyes. 眼睛
No,no. Your eyes! No. 不，你的眼睛，不
Chandler's eyes! 钱德的眼睛
I got glasses. 我戴上了眼镜
You always had glasses. 你一直都戴着眼镜
No, I didn't. 我才没有
Are you sure? 你确定？
Didn't you have a pair? 以前你没有戴眼镜吗？
They were really round and burgundy, and they made you look kind of... 你戴着圆形酒红色的眼镜 看起来有一点…
-Feminine. -Yes! -娘娘腔 -对
No. 不
I think the glasses look great. You look sexy. 我觉得你很适合戴眼镜 你看起来很性感
-Really? -Yeah. -真的吗？ -对
You didn't think I wore glasses? 你也以为以前我有戴眼镜吗？
Of course. 当然不是
The One With Phoebe's Cookies 本集播出：菲比的食谱
What do you want for an engagement gift? 你们要什么订婚礼物？
That's okay, we're not having a party... 没关系，我们不办派对…
so you don't have to get us.. 所以你们不必送我们…
If someone wants to give us a present, we can't deprive them of that joy. 如果有人想送我们礼物 我们不该剥夺他们的快乐
You should get them a little CD player. 你应该送他们携带型CD机
I already have one. 我已经有一台了
Unless someone borrowed it and left it at the gynecologist. 但有人借走 把它忘在妇产科诊所
Yeah, and by "someone" she means Joey. 对，至于“那个人” 她指的是乔伊
I know what I want! 我知道我要什么
-What we want, honey. -No,you don't want this. -是我们要什么，甜心 -不，你不要这个礼物
I want your grandmother's cookie recipe. 我要你奶奶的饼干食谱
You mean the chocolate chip cookie recipe? 你是说 巧克力碎片饼干的食谱吗？
The one my grandma made me swear on her deathbed... 我奶奶临死前 要我发誓…
that I would never let out of our family? 绝不会泄露给外人的饼干食谱？
Dying people say the craziest things. 快死的人都会胡言乱语
I've wanted it for years. I was gonna make cookies for my children. 多年来我一直都想得到它 我想帮我的孩子们做饼干
Break my heart. Oh, all right. 我真的很难过，好吧
I'll be the mom who makes the world's best chocolate chip cookies. 我要当能做出全世界 最好吃饼干的妈妈
Our kids are gonna be fat, aren't they? 我们的孩子会是胖子，对吧？
Ahoy! 你们好
-How's the boat? -I'm getting into this sailing stuff. -驾帆船出海还好玩吧？ -我开始喜欢驾驶帆船了
You finally took it out of the marina? 这次你终于出海了？
Why would I do that? 我为什么要那么做？
It took three guys to get the thing in there. 三个彪形大汉使出**的力气 才把它漂在海上
If you don't sail it, what do you do on it? 如果你不想开它出海 你在船上都做些什么呢？
It's a great place to just sit... 光是坐在那里就很舒服了…
hang around,drink a few beers, eat some chips. 我什么都不做，喝啤酒 吃洋芋片
It's good that you finally have a place to do that. 恭喜你终于找到 能那么做的地方了
I could teach you to sail if you want. 如果你要的话，我可以教你驾驶帆船
-You could? -I've been sailing my whole life. -你会驾驶帆船？ -我从小就会
When I was 15,my dad bought me my own boat. 我十五岁时 我爸送我一艘帆船
-Your own boat? -He was trying to cheer me up. -你有一艘帆船？ -他想要安慰我
My pony was sick. 我的小马生病了
（中央公园咖啡厅）
-You know what I was thinking? -What? -你知道我在想什么吗？ -什么？
Nothing,I just like to go like this. 没事，我只是想这么做
-What are you doing tonight? -Do you have a lecture? -今晚你要做什么？ -你有课吗？
-No, why? -Then, free as a bird. What's up? -没有啊，怎么了？ -那么我没事，怎么了？
My dad wants to know if you want to play racquetball. 我爸想约你去打回力球
Great! Dad must like you! 太棒了，爸一定很喜欢你
He doesn't ask just anyone to play. 他从来不会约人去打回力球
He didn't ask for you. He asked for "Chauncey." 他没有约你 他要约“小钱”
I assumed he meant you. 我猜他应该是指你
Did you correct him? 你纠正他了吗？
No,I thought it would be more fun this way. 没有，我觉得那样子比较好玩
Cool! Maybe you could do this every week. 太酷了，或许你们每星期都该这么做
Or you could sit on the porch... 你也可以坐在走廊上…
and make sure no one steals the trashcans. 确定垃圾桶不会被偷走
He does that every week too. 他每星期都会这么做
Just so you know, you have to let him win. He hates to lose. 你得让他赢，他最讨厌输了
Maybe I'll play with my left hand. 或许我该用左手打球
You're not a lefty? 你不是左撇子吗？
Does anybody know me? 有人认识我吗？
What's wrong? 怎么了？
I went to my old apartment to get the cookie recipe... 我到以前的公寓拿饼干食谱…
and that stupid fire burned it up! 那场愚蠢的大火把它烧了
No! Why didn't you make a copy and keep it in a fireproof box... 不！ 你为什么没有影印一份 把它放在防火的盒子里…
and keep it at least 100 yards away from the original? 将盒子放在离起火点 至少一百码的地方？
Because I'm normal. 因为我是个凡人
That was the one legacy my grandmother left me. 那是我奶奶留给我的传奇
And I know you wanted it as an engagement present. 我知道你要它当你的订婚礼物
We have to get you an engagement present? 我们得送你们订婚礼物？
Don't worry about it. 别担心
No one got me an engagement present. 没有人送我订婚礼物
I don't have the recipe, but here. 我没有食谱，但这个给你
I wish you health and happiness. 祝你们健康快乐
An old cookie? 一块放了很久的饼干？
This is what happens when you don't register for gifts. 不列出礼物清单 就是会发生这种事
I made a batch and froze it. This is the only one left. 我做了一些饼干，把它们冷冻起来 这是最后一块
We can't accept this. 我们不能收下它
Why not? 为什么？
Cause it's gross. 因为它很恶心
No, wait. I think I can figure out the recipe from this cookie. 不，等一下，我想我可以 利用这块饼干猜出整个食谱
I do this at work all the time. 我在工作时常常这么做
-Really? -I think so! -真的吗？ -我想我可以做到
Okay, Ross, we owe you a present. 好吧，罗斯，我们欠你一份礼物
Two! I've been engaged twice. 是两份，我订过两次婚
Look at this clown. 快来看看这个小丑
He thinks he can take up the whole river. 他以为整条河都是他的
Get out of the way, jackass! 别挡路，大混蛋
Who names their boat Coast Guard,anyway? 谁会把自己的船 命名为海岸防卫队？
That is the Coast Guard. 因为他们就是海岸防卫队
What are they doing here? 他们在这里做什么？
The coast is all the way over there. 海岸在那边
Joey, just ignore the boats. 乔伊，别管那些船
-We're not finished with our lesson. -All right. -我们的课还没有上完 -好吧
I'm gonna go over the basic points once more. 我要帮你复习一下基本要点
Come on,Rach. I got it, okay? 别麻烦了，瑞秋，我已经懂了
I want to go over there... 我想把船开到…
where that boatload of girls is. 那一船小妞旁边去
Is that it? You want to give... 真的吗？你想要…
a shout to the hot chicas? 跟那些小妞鬼混？
Okay, let's do that, Sailor Joe. 好了，来吧，水手乔伊
Quick question, though: What's this called? 快问快答，这叫什么？
-Boat rope? -Wrong! -船上的绳子？ -错了
How do you get the mainsail up? 要怎么把主帆拉上去？
Rub it? 摸一下就行了？
No. What do you do if I say we're coming about? 不，如果我说我们要转向了 你该怎么办？
I say, "Come again?" 我会说：“随你转？”
I know this one. I know this one. 我知道，这一题我会
Time's up. Now you're dead. 时间到，现在你死了
And deaf! 我也聋了
You go on and make your little jokes. 你继续开玩笑吧
If you don't know what you're doing... 如果你不知道自己在做什么…
you will die. Am I getting through to you? 你就会没命，你听懂了吗？
-Yes. -Don't just say yes. -懂了 -别只是说你懂了
This isn't a game. You could get hurt out here! 这不是游戏 你很可能会受伤
Do you want to pay attention, or do you want to die? 你要注意听我说话 还是想死呢？
I want to make a ship-to-shore call to Chandler. 我想从船上就打电话给钱德
-I definitely taste nutmeg. -You do? -我吃到了肉豆蔻 -真的吗？
You don't? Well, that's the difference... 你没吃到吗？那就是…
between a professional and a layman. 专业人员跟外行人的不同
That and arrogance. 没错，专业人员很傲慢
Hey. 嘿
Hey. How was sailing? 嘿，驾驶帆船出海好玩吗？
I don't want to talk about it. 我不想谈这件事
You could've at least saved me a cookie. 你们至少可以留一块饼干给我
Women are mean! 女人太无情了
I can't believe that. 我不敢相信
Now the only thing left of my grandmother's legacy is... 现在我奶奶的传奇 只剩下…
this crumb. 这块碎屑
I wish you a long and happy marriage. 祝你们白头偕老，婚姻美满
-Hey. -How was it? -嘿 -怎么样？
Well,I had a great time. 我玩得很开心
Chauncey on the other hand... 但是小钱…
I will tell the story. 让我来说吧
It was going great. I let him win, we were bonding... 我们相处甚欢 我放手让他赢球，他喜欢我…
he even said I could call him Dad. 甚至说我可以叫他爸爸
And what did he ask you not to call him? 他要你不能叫他什么？
"Daddy." 爹地
Look,here's the story. 听着，事情是这样的
We had just finished playing, and we were gonna take a steam. 我们打完球，决定去做桑拿
I walk into the room... 我走进蒸气室…
and it's really steamy. 里面雾气弥漫
So I take off my glasses, and that's when it happened. 于是我拿下眼镜 悲剧发生了
Guys? 你们在哪里？
-Over here. -Have a seat,son. -这边 -坐吧，孩子
Hey! 嘿
-Oh, my God! I can't believe it. -I know. -我的天啊，我不敢相信 -我知道
You gave my father a lap dance. 你坐在我爸的大腿上
Why do they put so much steam in there? 他们为什么 要把那里弄的雾气弥漫？
Because otherwise they'd have to call it the "room" room. 不那么做的话 那里只能叫做“房间”
Why? Why did that have to happen? 为什么？ 为什么会发生那种事？
Come on,it's not that big a deal. 别这样，那没有什么大不了的
Not that big a deal? 那没有什么大不了的？
There was touching of things. 我有种异样的感觉
I know you wanted to bond with my dad... 我知道你想跟我爸打好关系…
but did you have to bond to that part? 但你一定要从他那个地方开始吗？
I'm sure Dad doesn't care. 我相信爸不会在乎的
He probably thought it was funny. 或许他会觉得很好笑
He'll be telling this story for years. 他会把这个故事挂在嘴边
I don't want him to tell this story for years. 我就是不希望 他把这个故事挂在嘴边
Oh,but he will. 他会那么做的
He still tells the story about how Monica tried to escape from fat camp. 他还是会告诉大家 摩妮卡试图逃出减肥营的故事
I wasn't escaping. 我才没有那么做
Then how'd you get caught in the barbed wire? 那么你怎么会 被卡在铁丝网上的？
I was trying to help out a squirrel. 我想要救一只松鼠
You were trying to eat it. 你想吃掉他
If that is your father calling to tell this story... 如果是你爸打电话来 告诉你这件事…
then the marriage is off! 那么我们的婚礼就取消了
Come on. Hello. 别这样，喂
I'm sorry, you have the wrong number. 对不起，你打错电话了
I'll call you later, Dad. I love you. 我待会回你电话，爸 我爱你
I'm off to see your dad. 我要去见你爸
Aren't you a little overdressed? 你不会穿太多了吗？
You better make sure he tips you this time. 你最好确定 这次他会付你小费
I figured I would try to convince him not to tell the story anymore... 我想说服他 别再提那件事…
and I figured the best way to do that was face to face. 我想最好的办法 就是跟他面对面谈一谈
And by "face," I don't mean his lap. 我说的“面对面”，指的不是他的大腿
And by "face," I don't mean my ass. 我说的“面对面”，指的不是我的**
Are you getting Monica and Chandler a present? 你要送摩妮卡跟钱德礼物？
I don't know. You know, they didn't get us anything. 我不知道 他们没有送我们礼物
Thank you! 谢谢你
Hey. 嘿
Well,hello. 嗨
So when are we getting back out on the water, matey? 我们什么时候要再出航？伙伴
I don't know the boat way to say this, but, never. 我不知道水手是怎么说的 但我死都不要
Why not? 为什么？
Because you're mean on the boat. 因为你在船上很凶
I was just trying to teach you. 我只是想教会你
Well,lesson learned. Rachel is mean. 我的确学会了教训 那就是瑞秋很凶
Yep, yep, yep. 对，没错
I remember when she took me out on her dad's boat. 我还记得她驾驶她爸的船 带我出海
She wouldn't let me help at all. 她完全不让我插手
Excuse me, I wanted you to help. 对不起，我要你帮我
But you couldn't move... 但你连动都动不了…
because you were wearing three life jackets. 因为你穿了三件救生衣
You have to respect the sea. 我们得敬畏大海
Joey,I'm sorry if you thought that was mean. 乔伊，如果你觉得我很凶 对不起
But I tell you, that was not mean. 但我告诉你，我一点都不凶
My father is mean. He used to always yell at me on the boat. 我爸才凶，以前在船上 他总会对我大吼大叫
It was horrible. I was being a really good teacher. 那真的很可怕 我是个很棒的老师
Does a good teacher say, "Put down the beer,pinhead!" 好老师会说： “把啤酒放下，猪头”？
Does a good student drink 7 beers during his first lesson? 好学生会在上第一堂课时 喝掉七罐啤酒？
Six and a half. 是六罐半
You knocked the last one out of my hand, remember? 你把最后一罐从我手里 敲掉，还记得吗？
I didn't want you to get hit by the boom. 我不希望你被船桅打中
Well,it hit me anyway. 它的确打中我了
It would have hurt a lot less if I had finished that last beer. 如果我能喝完最后一罐啤酒 或许不会那么痛
I'm sorry. I will try to tone it down and stop yelling. 对不起，我会试着小声点 不再对你大吼大叫
No bossing me around? 你不会再使唤我？
-I won't boss you around. -And be nice? -我不会再使唤你 -你会对我很好？
-I'll be nice. -You'll be topless? -我会对你很好 -你会脱掉上衣？
-Joey! -You want me to learn? -乔伊 -你希望我学会吗？
Here's batch 22. Maybe these are like your grandma's. 这是二十二号 或许它们跟你奶奶的饼干味道很像
This has a bit of orange peel, but no nutmeg. 我放了一些橘子皮 没有放肉豆蔻
Let's give it a shot. 我们来试吃吧
I haven't made so many cookies since 9th grade. 自从九年级后 我再也没做过这么多饼干
What for, a bake sale? 你为了义卖会做那么多饼干吗？
No, just a Friday night. 不，那是我星期五晚上要吃的
These are pretty good. 这些饼干真的很好吃
Yeah, but not as good as batch 17. 对，但没有十七号好吃
Which one was that? 十七号是哪一块？
The ones we had after you almost threw up. 你几乎快吐出来后 吃的那块饼干
Oh, yeah, batch 17 was good. 对，十七号很好吃
I did not like batch 16. 我不喜欢十六号
I'm okay. 我没事
Any more from the good batch? We could work off those. 十七号还有剩吗？ 我们可以好好研究一下
I think there's one left. 我想应该还剩一块
Batch 16. Sixteen, people, get out of the way! 十六号 这是十六号，别挡路
Okay, Joey. You're doing really good. 乔伊，你表现得很好
I just need you to step to the portside. 我要你站到左舷去
Remember talking about the portside? 还记得左舷是哪一边吗？
Oh,yeah. 当然
No. 不
It's left, sweetie, but that's okay. That's a tough one. 是左边，甜心，但没关系 那一题太难了
Why not just say left? 为什么不干脆说左边就好了呢？
Okay,go to the left. 好吧，到左边去
The left. 左边
Just sit over there! 坐在那边
You're yelling again. See that? 看到没？你又在大吼大叫了
Oh,no,no. Very quiet. Said with love, no yelling. 不，我很小声 语气充满了爱意，我没有大吼大叫
You know what? 你知道了？
Since I'm here,I'm gonna have a beer on the portside. 既然我已经坐在这里 我要在左舷喝一罐啤酒
See what I did there? 你看到我刚刚做了什么吗？
We're luffing a little. Can you tighten up the Cunningham? 风有点大 麻烦你把船绳拉紧
You just said a bunch of stuff I don't know. 你说了一堆我听不懂的话
Joey,come on! We just went over this. 乔伊，别这样 我刚刚才教过你
We did that when that bird... 你教我的时候 有只鸟嘴巴里…
flew over with the fish in his mouth. 衔着鱼飞过去
Did you see it? It was gross. 你看到了吗？那真的很恶心
I did not see the bird or the fish! 我没有看到鸟或鱼
I did not see the piece of Styrofoam shaped like Mike Tyson! 也没看到形状像泰森的保丽龙
I did not, because I was trying to teach you how to sail a boat. 我没有看到 因为我忙着教你驾驶帆船
Which obviously is an impossible thing to do. 很明显地 那是不可能的
You're yelling, and I don't see you taking your top off. 你在大吼大叫 而且你没有脱掉上衣
I quit! 我放弃了
-What do you mean? You can't quit. -Why not? -你是什么意思？你不能放弃 -为什么？
You're not finished! I won't have it. Greenes do not quit. 你还没有学会，我不准你那么做 葛林家的人不会放弃
Greenes? 葛林家的人？
I'm a Tribbiani. Tribbianis quit. 我姓崔比亚尼 崔比亚尼家的人会放弃
Oh, my God. 我的天啊
I just said, "Greenes don't quit," didn't I? 刚刚我说 葛林家的人不会放弃，对吧？
Did I say, "Greenes don't quit"? 我到底说了没有？
Yes! And you're still yelling at me. 对，你还在对我大吼大叫
No,I'm not yelling at you. I'm just yelling near you. 不，我没有对你大吼大叫 我是对你身边的空气大吼大叫
Oh, God, Joey. I'm my father. 天啊，乔伊，我就跟我爸一样
Oh,my God. This is horrible. 天啊，这真的太可怕了
I try so hard not to be my mother, I didn't see this coming. 我很努力不要跟我妈一样 却没有提防到这一点
I'm so sorry. I just wanted you to learn. 我真的很抱歉 我只希望你能学会驾驶帆船
I did learn. 我的确学会了
-Really? -Yeah, come on. -真的吗？ -没错，来吧
It's okay. 没关系的
I know what a mainsail is. 我知道主帆是什么
I know to duck when the boom comes across. 我知道船桅过来时 一定要低头
-I know port is right. -Left. -我知道左舷是右边 -左边才对
Damn it! 该死
It would make my grandmother happy... 我们试着研究出她的食谱…
that we're trying to figure out her recipe. 这会让我奶奶觉得开心
I bet she's looking up at us and smiling right now. 我敢说她正抬头看着我们 对我们微笑
Looking up? 抬头看我们？
She was really nice to me but she's in hell for sure. 她对我真的很好 但现在她一定在地狱里
Well,I've tried everything. 我已经努力过了
I give up. I'm not gonna be the mom... 我放弃，我没办法成为…
who makes the world's best cookies. 做出全世界 最好吃饼干的妈妈
I do make the best duck confit with broccoli raab. 但我会做最好吃的 花椰菜配油封鸭
Kids love that,right? 小孩子很喜欢吃那道菜吧？
Isn't there any relative that has the recipe? 难道你家的亲戚 都没有食谱吗？
What about your sister? 你妹妹呢？
No. I made a promise to myself that the next time... 不，我跟自己发誓…
I would talk to Ursula is over my dead body. 除非我死掉 不然我不会跟乌苏拉说话
And that's not happening till October 15,2032. 那一天将会是 2032年10月15日
That's the day you're gonna die? 那天你会死掉？
I've got shuffleboard that day. 那天我要去玩推圆盘游戏
That's what you think. 你少做梦了
What about friends of your grandma? 你奶奶的朋友呢？
Wouldn't they have the recipe? 他们没有食谱吗？
I may have relatives in France who would know. 我在法国的亲戚，可能有人知道
My grandmother said she got it from her grandmother, "Nestley Toulouse." 我奶奶说食谱是她奶奶 “鸟巢”传给她的
What was her name? 她叫什么名字？
Nestley Toulouse. 鸟巢
Nestle Tollhouse? 雀巢？
You Americans always butcher the French language. 美国人就是 没办法说好法文
Phoebe, is this the recipe? 菲比，这是你奶奶的食谱吗？
Yes! 对
Oh. 喔
I cannot believe that I spent... 我不敢相信…
two days figuring out that recipe. 我花了两天时间研究那份食谱
It was here the whole time! 结果它一直在这里
I know! You see, it is stuff like this... 我知道 就是这样的事情…
which is why you're burning in hell! 害得你得在地狱里受苦
So you understand. 那么你懂了
I'd feel better if you didn't tell what happened. 如果你可以不把那件事说出去 我会觉得舒服一点
I'm a little embarrassed about it. 我觉得很不好意思
I understand completely. 我完全了解
Nothing's scarier than embarrassing yourself... 最可怕的事莫过于...
in front of your in-laws. 在丈人跟丈母娘面前丢脸
As a matter of fact, when I started dating Judy, I was unemployed. 事实上我开始跟茱蒂交往时 根本就没有工作
Her father asked me what I did for a living. 她爸问我是干哪一行的
I said I was a lawyer. 我说我是律师
-What'd you do when they found out? -They never did. -他们发现事实后你怎么办？ -他们一直都没有发现
So if you ever see me giving them legal advice, just nod along. 如果你看到我在帮他们做法律咨询 只要点头就行了
Shall we? 我们可以进去了吗？
So,I guess we wear swimsuits in here. 我猜这里得穿泳装才能进来
Well,Joey,I hate to admit it... 乔伊，我得承认…
your way of sailing is a lot more fun. 你的航海方式 真的有趣多了
Why don't you give a pull on that rope? 你为什么不拉一下那条绳子？
We're not sailing. 我们没有要出海
-Just pull on it. -All right. -拉一下 -好吧
Sandwiches! 三明治
What else? 不然会是什么呢？
Here you go. 这个给你
-Thank you. -Oh,wow. -谢谢 -哇
-What are you doing? -Sorry. -你在做什么？ -对不起
Not like that. You're letting all the good stuff fall out. 别那样 好料的都掉在地上了
Careful! You're wasting good pastrami! 小心 你浪费了好吃的腌熏牛肉
Oh,my God. I'm my dad! 天啊，我就跟我爸一样