-What's the matter? -Someone on the subway licked my neck! -怎么了？ -搭地铁时有人舔我的脖子
Willy's still alive! 威利还活着
-What are you doing? -My mom called. -你们在做什么？ -我妈打电话来
They're announcing our engagement in the paper. 他们要登报通知亲友 我们要订婚了
-We're looking for a good picture. -I'm afraid that does not exist. -我们在找一张很漂亮的合照 -恐怕那是不可能的事
There are great pictures of us. 我们合拍了很多不错的照片
No,there are great pictures of you next to a guy who's going like this... 不，你照的很好 但你旁边的男人是这样的
Oh, my God, that's the creep that you're with at the Statue of Liberty. 天啊，他就是在自由女神像旁 跟你合照的怪胎
I don't know what it is. I just can't take a good picture. 我不知道这是怎么一回事 我就没办法好好照相
Here's a great one. 这一张很不错
-Yeah,I'm not in that. -No,but look at me,all tan. -对，那一张没有我 -没错，但我全身晒得黑亮
Why don't you get portraits done by a professional photographer? 你们为什么不请专业摄影师 帮你们拍照呢？
That's a great idea. I bet they have one of those wind machines. 那是个好点子 我敢说他们一定有大风扇
Yeah,that's great. Next to that, Chandler won't look so stupid. 那的确很棒，真的那么做的话 钱德应该看起来不会这么蠢
-Chandler,what do you say? -All right,but I'm not going. -钱德，你觉得呢？ -没问题，但我不去
"I'm" going. “我”会去
The One With The Engagement Picture 本集播出：订婚照

Dude,that reverse lay-up. 兄弟，那一记反手投篮帅呆了
-And how about those three-pointers? -Amazing. -那些三分球呢？ -棒到不行
And those guys were this close to letting us play this time too. 这次也是就差这么一点 那些家伙就答应让我们上场了
Hey, look. Phoebe's talking to Cute Coffeehouse Guy. 你们看 菲比在跟咖啡厅帅哥说话
You call him "Cute Coffeehouse Guy"? We call him "Hums While He Pees." 你叫他“咖啡厅帅哥”吗？ 我们叫他“边尿边哼歌先生”
Yes,and we call Ross "Lingers in the Bathroom." 对，我们叫罗斯 “浴室里的思考家”
Hey,you guys, "Hums While He Pees" just asked me out. 大伙们，边尿边哼歌先生 刚刚约我出去
-I thought that guy was married. -He's getting divorced. -我以为他结婚了 -没错，但他正在办离婚
Ross,maybe you know him. 罗斯，或许你认识他
It's not a club. 这又不是俱乐部
If he's getting a divorce, is it a good idea to date him? 如果他正在办离婚 你觉得跟他约会适当吗？
-Hey,divorced men are not bad men. -That's on the napkins at the club. -离婚男人不是坏男人 -他们把那句话印在俱乐部的纸巾上
-I gotta go to work. -You don't have to go for a half-hour. -我得回去上班了 -你还可以休息半小时
My assistant,Tag,does sit-ups in the office during lunch. 我的助理泰格午餐时间时 会在办公室做仰卧起坐
I could just spread him on a cracker. 我真的快被他迷死了
Rach,why would you hire this guy? 你在暗恋他 为什么还要雇用他？
-You know you can't date him,right? -I know that. -你知道你不能跟他约会，对吧？ -对，我知道
We spend so much time together, he should call me his "work-wife." 我们开玩笑说 因为我们常常在一起 他应该叫我“工作上的太太”
Soon he'll be able to call you "that lady he knew that got fired." 很快地他就可以叫你 “那个被开除的女人”
I won't get fired, because I'm not gonna act on it. 我不会被开除 因为我不会采取行动
You wouldn't mind if he was dating someone? 你不会介意 他跟别人约会吧？
Why,is he? He is, isn't he? He's dating that slut in marketing. 怎么了？他有吗？他有，对吧？ 他跟行销部那个女人约会
Maybe I should open a divorced men's club. 或许我该成立 一个离婚男子俱乐部
Dude,that's so sad. 兄弟，那太惨了
I could put a basketball court in the back. 我会在后院设一个篮球场
Could I play? 我能下场打球吗？
Oh,no sit-ups today,Tag? 你今天不做仰卧起坐吗？泰格
-I just did them. -Well,drop and give me 10 more. -我刚刚做完 -再做十下吧
What? 什么？
I had a drink with lunch. 我午餐喝了酒
-Did those cost reports come in? -I did them last night. -成本报告送过来了吗？ -我昨晚就已经归档了
Could you make me 4 copies? 麻烦你帮我影印四份
-Sure. -Great, thank you. -没问题 -太棒了，谢谢你
-Hey,Rachel. -Hi,Melissa. What's up? -嗨，瑞秋 -嗨，梅丽莎，有什么事吗？
I'm just about to go out to the store. 我正好要去血拼
Get some stuff to put in my backpack. 买些东西放进我的背包里
Dried fruit and granola, and stuff like that. 水果干，速食麦片 大概就是那一类的东西
-What's up? -Is Tag here? -有什么事吗？ -泰格在吗？
No. Why? 他不在，怎么了？
I was gonna talk to him about tonight. 我要来问他 今晚要不要跟我出去
Really? You got a little crush on Tag there, do ya? 真的吗？ 你喜欢泰格，对吧？
We've been flirting back and forth... 我们一直都在眉来眼去的…
but I was hoping tonight it would turn into something a little more. 但我希望今晚 事情能有点进展
Easy there, Melissa. This ain't a locker room,okay. 别猴急，梅丽莎 这里不是更衣室
But you know, I remember him saying that he had plans tonight. 但我记得他说过 今晚他已经有约了
-Oh,no. -Oh,yeah. -不 -没错
All right, back to work. 好吧，快回去工作
Hey,isn't that Tag's backpack? 那不是泰格的背包吗？
I don't want to be known as the office bitch, but I'll call your supervisor. 我不想当办公室的臭女人 但我会打电话给你主管
Great, that's great, Monica. Great. 太棒了，非常不错，摩妮卡
Now, Chandler, you want to give us a smile? 好了，钱德 你能笑一个吗？
Okay. 好吧
-I'm sorry, is the seat uncomfortable? -No,I am. -对不起，那张椅子很不舒服吗？ -不，是我很不舒服
Chandler,I know you can do this. You have a beautiful smile. 钱德，我知道你办得到 你笑起来很帅
-I do? -Yeah. -是吗？ -没错
Maybe you don't have to smile. Let's try something else. 或许你不必笑 我们来试试别的点子
-Try looking sexy. -Okay. -试着表现出性感的样子 -好吧
Or not. 还是不要吧
Hi, Joey, what are you doing here? 乔伊，你在这里做什么？
I got an audition down the street, and I spilled sauce on my shirt. 我要在街底试镜 结果酱汁沾到衣服上了
-You got an extra one? -Yeah,sure. -你有多余的衬衫吗？ -当然有
Here. 拿去吧
Great. 太棒了
You got anything that's not Ralph Lauren? 你有除了劳夫罗兰外 其他品牌的衣服吗？
Yeah, I don't think so, Joe. 应该没有，乔伊
I guess this'll be fine. 我猜这件应该可以
-What are you doing tonight? -Nothing. Why? -你今晚要做什么？ -没事，怎么了？
How would you feel about taking out Tag? I'll pay. 你要不要带我的助理泰格 出去玩？我付钱
It's gonna take a lot of money for me to go out on a date with a dude. 要我跟男人出去约会 可得付我一大笔钱
I'm not asking you to go on a date with him. 我不是要你跟他约会
Really? Because I could kind of use the money. 真的吗？因为我真的很缺钱
He's new in town and he doesn't have any guy friends. 他刚搬到这里来 我知道他没有男性朋友
Take him to a ball game or something. I'd appreciate it. 带他去看球赛或做别的事 我会非常感激你
-Yeah, okay, no problem. -Thank you. -好的，没问题 -谢谢你
Ooh, hey, doughnuts! 是甜甜圈
I know. Let's try a look... 我知道，我们来试试看…
of far-off wonderment. 出神的表情
Gaze into our future and think about our marriage and the days to come. 凝视我们的未来 想想我们的婚姻跟以后的日子
Chandler, what is the matter with your face? 钱德，你的脸到底是怎么了？
This picture should say "Geller and Bing to be married"... 这张照片应该要表达 “盖勒和宾府喜事”的…
not "Local woman saves drowning moron." 不是“英勇女市民 救了快淹死的混蛋”
Hey,don't laugh at him. He's my drowning moron. 嘿，别笑他 这个快淹死的混蛋是我的
That's it, that's it! Take it,take it! 对了，就是这样 快拍下来
（中央公园咖啡厅）
I like this one. 我喜欢这一张
It seems to say, "I love you and that's why I have to kill you." 它似乎是在说：“我爱你 所以我要杀了你”
Can't all be bad. 不会全部都那么糟糕啦
Find the one where you make your bedroom eyes. 找那张你装出 睡眼朦胧的照片
There it is. 我找到了
Oh,my God, those are my bedroom eyes? 我的天啊 这就是我睡眼朦胧的样子？
Why did you ever sleep with me? 你为什么要跟我同床共枕？
Do you really want to pull at that thread? 你真的想提这件事情吗？
-I'm having a good time. -Me too. -我真的玩得很开心 -我也是
Sorry that guy on the subway licked your neck. 很抱歉地铁里那个家伙 舔了你的脖子
No,that's okay. He's a friend. 不，没关系，他是我们的朋友
I don't mean to be presumptuous... 恕我放肆…
but I have tickets to the ballroom-dancing finals tomorrow. 但我有明天 国际标准舞总决赛的门票
Yeah,I.. 对，我…
Well,I missed the semifinals, so I think I would just be lost. 我没有看准决赛 我想我会看不懂
I know it's lame,but I got these tickets from my boss.. 我知道那真的很无聊 但这些票是我的老板…
Oh, no, no, no, my God! 喔，不，我的天啊
Okay, don't freak out. I'll go. 好了，别大惊小怪，我去就是
It's my ex-wife,Whitney. 是我的前妻惠特妮
I cannot deal with her now. She's crazy. 我现在没办法面对她 那个女人疯了
Okay,I know. Hold on. 好吧，我知道，等一下
-Hey,Ross. -Yeah. -嘿，罗斯 -什么事？
That's Whitney,Kyle's ex-wife out there. 凯尔的前妻惠特妮就在外面
Do you think you could divert her so we could slip out? 你可以把她诱开 让我们脱身吗？
What? No. 什么？不
Okay, but I have two tickets to the ballroom-dance finals. 好吧，但我有两张 国际标准舞总决赛的门票
I don't think so, Phoebe. 我想还是不要吧，菲比
All right,I'll do it. 好吧，我愿意
-But just because you're a friend. -Okay. -但那只是因为你是我的朋友 -好吧
Hi,Ginger. 嗨，大舞王
I want my key back. 我要拿回我的钥匙
-I don't have it. -It's right there. -我没拿 -钥匙就那里
Okay, Sherlock. 好吧，大侦探福尔摩斯
I'm sorry, but you'd better go. 对不起 但你最好快点离开，菲比
I just wanted to thank you for diverting Kyle's ex. 我只是要谢谢你 帮我们诱开凯尔的前妻
You're welcome. We'll talk about it later. 别客气，待会再谈
-Hi,Whitney. -Hi,Ross. -嗨，惠特妮 -嗨，罗斯
-Are you ready for breakfast? -Yep. -你准备好要去吃早餐了吗？ -是的
Kyle's ex-wife? You were supposed to divert her, not date her. 凯尔的前妻？你应该要诱开她 不是跟她约会
Can you give me a second while I talk to this woman... 你能不能等我一下？ 我得跟这个女人谈一谈…
who, by the way, did not spend the night? 而且，她没有在这里过夜
-Sure. -Okay. -没问题 -好吧
I did divert her, and we ended up having a great time, okay? 我的确诱开她了 后来我们玩得很开心，好吗？
Watching ballroom dancing? 你们一起去看标准舞比赛？
Yes,that's where we realized we were both super cool people. 对，那时我们发现 事实上我们都酷呆了
Look, Kyle just told me some really bad stuff about her. 听着，凯尔告诉我 她有些很差劲的缺点
Like what? 譬如说呢？
Like she's really mean, and she's overly critical and.. 譬如说她很无情 她喜欢吹毛求疵…
She will paint a room a really bright color without even checking with you. 她会不经过你的同意 把房间漆成很明亮的颜色
Okay. 好吧
And she uses sex as a weapon. 她还会把性当成武器
Thank you for warning me. 谢谢你的警告
At breakfast, I'll be on alert for room painting and sex weapons. 吃早餐时我会注意 油漆跟性武器
-You're still gonna go out with her? -Yeah. -你还是要跟她约会？ -对
Well, didn't you hear what I just said? 你没有听到 刚刚我说的话吗？
Phoebe, come on. I mean, consider the source. 菲比，少来了 你的消息来源有问题
Of course her ex-husband's gonna say that stuff. Now if you'll excuse me. 她的前夫当然会那么说 请你离开了啦
Listen to me, she is crazy! 听我说，她疯了
Your door isn't soundproof. 你的门没有隔音功能
You see? Nothing is good enough for her. 看到了吧？她就是爱挑剔
-Morning. -Hi,Tag. -早安 -嗨，泰格
-Did you have fun with Joey? -Yeah, we went to the Knicks game. -昨晚你跟乔伊玩得开心吗？ -对，我们去看尼克队比赛
That's nice. 那真的太棒了
Then we went to a bar, and he hooked us up with all these women. 然后我们去酒吧玩 他帮我们泡上好多女人
Women? You mean, like old women? 女人？你是说老女人？
Kind of old, like 30. 有点老，大概三十岁
I never used to be able to talk to girls in bars... 我以前没办法 在酒吧里跟女人聊天…
but I got like 20 phone numbers last night. 但昨晚我就拿到了 二十个电话号码
That's great. 那真的是太棒了
Joey must have really taught you some stuff. 乔伊真的教会你一些事
A little. 没错
How you doing? 你好吗？
See? That's a great smile. Easy, natural. 看吧？那个笑容非常灿烂 放轻松，自然一点
Now pretend I have a camera. 现在假装我手上拿了照相机
-You're changing it. -I can't help it. -你的笑容变了 -我控制不了自己
You want to know what I do when I take resume shots? 你想知道 我都是怎么拍沙龙照的吗？
Borrow money from me? 你跟我借钱？
Yeah. Okay, first of all, you want to make it look spontaneous. 对，好吧，首先 你得装出自然的样子
So here's what I do. I look down, look down, keep looking down. 我都是这么做的，我会低头 低头，继续低头
Then I look up. 然后抬头
See? Now you try. 看到没？现在你来试试看
Look down. You're looking down. Keep looking down. 低头，低头，继续低头
Why is there jelly on your shoe? 你的鞋子上为什么会有果酱？
I had a donut. 我吃了甜甜圈
So, I heard you had some fun with Tag last night. 听说昨晚你跟泰格玩得很开心
Yeah, he's all right. 对，那家伙还不错
Yeah, and you had fun teaching him how to be all "Joey." 对，你很高兴教他怎么当“乔伊”
-What? -You know, all the women. -什么？ -你知道的，泡马子
You can't teach someone to be good with women. 你没办法教别人怎么泡马子
That's why I never had any luck with Chandler. 所以我跟钱德出去 老是泡不到马子
I'm right here. 我在这里耶
Would you mind just not going out with him again? 你能不能别再跟他一起出去？
Just the idea of you and he and all these women.. 就是你跟他一起去泡马子…
I know he's my assistant, and we can't date! 我知道他是我的助理 我不能跟他约会
But it bothers me, all right? 但这真的让我很困扰，好吗？
No, no, no, you can't take him away from me. 不，你不能抢走他
I got a great partner to pick up girls with. Finally! 我终于找到一个 可以跟我一起去泡马子的拍档
I'm still right here. 我还在这里耶
Will you talk to him... 至少你可以跟他谈一谈…
and tell him how unsatisfying this dating-tons-of-women thing is? 告诉他跟一大堆女人约会 既空虚又得不到满足
What? 什么？
I don't want him to meet anybody until I'm over my crush. 在我结束对他的暗恋之前 我不要他跟任何人约会
I will get over it. 我会忘记他的
It's not like I love him. It's just physical. 我并不爱他 那只是肉体上的吸引力
I get these crushes all the time. I had a crush on you at first. 我常常这样暗恋男人 刚认识你时我就暗恋过你
I know. Monica told me. 我知道，摩妮卡跟我说过
Did you have a crush on me when we first met? 我们刚认识时 你暗恋过我吗？
Yeah, sure. 对，有啊
Can you people not see me? 难道你们就是看不到我吗？
Will you talk to him? 你能跟他谈谈吗？
-I don't know, Rach. -I'll give you 10 Ralph Lauren shirts. -我不知道，瑞秋 -我会送你十件劳夫罗兰的衬衫
One. 一件
No, 10. You said 10. You can't take that back. 不，十件，你说十件 你不能反悔
You wanted to talk to me? 你有事要跟我谈？
I don't know. You got something for me? 我不知道 你拿了东西来给我吗？
Yeah, this is from Rachel. 对，这是瑞秋要给你的
Ten. Okay. 十件，好吧
Tag, there's such a thing as too many women. 泰格，跟太多女人约会 是不好的
-Really? -Yeah,for you. -真的吗？ -对你来说是的
-Hey, there you are. -There I am. -嘿，你来了 -我来了
-You okay? -Yeah, Joey said I needed to relax. -你没事吧？ -没事，乔伊说我需要放轻松
So he gave me an antihistamine. 他给我吃抗组胺药
What? 什么？
I fell asleep on the subway and went to Brooklyn. 我搭地铁时睡着了 结果到了布鲁克林
Brooklyn is far. 布鲁克林好远
What were you thinking? 你在想什么？
But don't worry, because I know how to take a picture now. 别担心 因为现在我知道要怎么拍照了
Okay, see. Look down. 好了，看吧，低头
Look down. 低头
Look down. 低头
-Chandler? -Yeah? -钱德 -什么事？
-Hi. -Hi. -嗨 -嗨
How are things going with Crazy? Has she cooked your rabbit yet? 你跟疯婆子还好吧？ 她把你的兔子拿去煮了吗？
Listen, you are hearing one side of the story. Okay? 听着，你只听到片面之词，好吗？
FYI, she must have shown Kyle over 30 paint samples... 还有，她拿了三十份 油漆样本给凯尔看…
before she painted that room. 之后她才动手漆房间
And his response to each one was, "I don't give a tiny rat's ass." 他对每一份样本的反应是 “我一点都不在乎”
Maybe she should have spent a little less time decorating... 或许她该少花点时间在装璜上…
and a little more time in the bedroom. 多花一点时间在卧室里
I don't think we are going to have that problem... 我想我们不会 有那样的问题…
but maybe it's because I am not emotionally unavailable. 但或许那是因为 我不会吝于付出感情
You think he's emotionally unavailable? 你认为他吝于付出感情？
I think he can be. 我想有那个可能
Maybe he wouldn't be... 如果她没有…
if she didn't bring the office home every night. 每晚把公事带回家做 或许他就不会那样子
Excuse her for knowing what she wants to do with her life. 你得原谅她 知道该怎么面对她的生活
Well, she certainly knew what she was doing New Year's Eve 1997. 她的确知道 她在1997年除夕做了什么
I knew you were going to throw that in my face! 我就知道你会那么说
That was three years ago. She apologized and apologized. 那是三年前的事 她一再地道歉
What more do you want?! 你还想怎么样？
We want the last 6 years back! 我们要找回六年的时光
So do we! So do we! 我们也是
I'm sorry you had to see that. 很抱歉让你们看这一幕
-Morning, Rachel. -Hi. -早安，瑞秋 -嗨
Hey, so, what'd you do last night? 昨晚你做了什么？
-Went out with Joey. -Yeah? -我跟乔伊出去 -是吗？
Another night of bird-dogging the chicas? 你们又去泡妞了？
No, we had a really good talk. 不，我们坐下来长谈
I don't think I'll do the bar scene anymore. 我想我不会 再去酒吧泡女人了
Wow, I did not see that coming. 我没想到你会那么说
It's just not really who I am. 那不是真正的我
I've always been happier when.. Why am I telling you this? 我一直都很快乐，当… 我为什么要告诉你这件事？
-You don't care about this stuff. -Yes,I do. -你不会关心这种事 -不，我很关心
You were saying, "I'm happier when I..." 刚刚你说 “我一直都很快乐，当…”
When I'm in a relationship. 当我谈恋爱时
-I love having a girlfriend. -Really? -我喜欢女朋友陪在身边 -真的吗？
Someone I can spoil, you know. 我可以好好宠爱她
Spoil? 宠爱？
Let me ask you something. 我要问你一件事
Do you believe there's one perfect person for everyone? 你相信我们都在寻找另一半吗？
I'm starting to. 我开始相信了
If that person's in your life you should do something? 如果那个人已经出现在你的生命中 你应该努力去争取吗？
Yes. Hell,yes. 对，当然
All right, then, it's settled. 好吧，那么我就安心了
-I'm getting back together with my ex-girlfriend. -I would love to! -我要跟我前女友复合 -我愿意
What? 什么？
Hello? 喂？
This is gonna be a while. Excuse me. 我应该会谈上一阵子，对不起
Yeah. 对
Yeah. 对
My God! 我的天啊
Oh, I'm sorry. Is that annoying? 对不起，吵到你了吗？
And speaking of being selfish in bed, how's Whitney? 说到在床上很自私 惠特妮还好吗？
Maybe she wouldn't have to be selfish in bed... 或许她不必在床上很自私…
if someone else knew where everything was. 如果另一个人知道 哪里是哪里
Oh, he knows. 他的确知道
For the most part. 大部份啦
Oh, hey. Good, you're both here. 嘿，太好了，你们两个都在
We kind of need to talk. 我们得谈一谈
-Both of you together? -What's up? -你们两个在一起？ -怎么了？
Well,I went over to Kyle's last night to pick up a few things... 昨晚我到凯尔家 拿一些东西…
and we got to reminiscing. 我们回忆了一些往事
We talked most of the night... 几乎谈了一整个晚上…
and realized the reason we're angry with each other... 我们明白 我们会这么气对方…
is because there are still feelings there. 是因为我们还对彼此有感觉
So... 所以…
Oh, just say it, Kyle! 喔，快说吧，凯尔
We're gonna try again. 我们要再试一次
What about her whining, and her constant need for attention? 你不是说她爱抱怨 常常要人注意她吗？
I'll work on that. 我会努力调整自己
Right, because you're so capable of change. 对，因为你很善变
You know,he hums when he pees. 你知道的，他会边尿边哼歌
-I do know. -Makes him miss the bowl, but whatever. -我知道 -所以他都尿不准，但那不重要
We're so sorry. 我们很抱歉
That's all right. We don't need you. I'm over it already. 没关系，我们不需要你们 我已经忘了这件事
Yeah, and I don't even give a tiny rat's ass. 对，我根本一点都不在乎
Yeah, we're gonna go. 我们得走了
I'm sorry. 对不起
Phoebe, you were right about her. 菲比，你没有看错她
You know, she did try to use sex as a weapon. 她的确试图把性当成武器
Yeah, I hurt my back a little. 我的背真的好痛
You know, he hums while he does other stuff too. 他做其他事时，也会哼歌
We're better off without them. 没有他们，我们能过得更好
Even if they break up again, you better not let him in your sad men's club. 就算他们再分手，千万别让他 加入你的伤心男子俱乐部
-Divorced men's club. -Po-tay-to, po-tah-to. -是离婚男人俱乐部 -有什么不一样呢
Hey, check it out. 大家快来看
-My mom sent me the paper. -Let's see it. -我妈把报纸寄给我 -我们来瞧瞧
-Oh, yeah, that looks good. -You make a very attractive couple. -看起来不错 -你们看起来很配
-Yeah, we look great together. -We really do. -对，我们是天生一对 -一点都没错
Okay. 好吧
Imagine what our kids would look like. 想像一下我们的孩子会是什么模样
We don't have to imagine. 我们不必想像
I'm marrying her. 我要娶她
We'll just see. 走着瞧吧