[00:09.59]What do you give someone
[00:12.31]Who's already got one of everything you thought would be the perfect
[00:16.64]Accoutrement to their unnerving temperament?
[00:21.89]Attention
[00:24.54]What could a lowly peasant being like myself
[00:29.50]Offer a perfect pleasant savior of humanity
[00:33.28]The redeemer of us sickly, sinning hillbillies?
[00:39.98]Attention
[00:44.94]Just one more resounding stab at all the others
[00:51.52]You've almost blown your cover
[00:53.53]But your traps don't stick
[00:55.77]One more bottle should do the trick
[00:58.00]Discreetly cleansing the remnants of every disdainful quip
[01:04.27]You found no escape route
[01:07.16]But I know you well enough to hate you now
[01:15.75]It's too bad you haven't figured that out
[01:35.96]What do you call someone
[01:38.01]Who calls you out on DIY ethics you don't embody
[01:42.62]As he drains his dad and mommy's monthly data plan?
[01:48.81]An asshole
[01:50.85]With an iPhone
[01:54.28]I'll admit, I'm in the same boat
[01:56.96]Caught between my adolescent safety net
[02:00.23]And where the world wants me to be
[02:03.46]But I never use that as an excuse
[02:06.39]To treat my friends the way that you treat me
[02:30.78]Just one more distorted, sad attempt at humor
[02:36.68]From the jagged, bleeding tumor in our throat
[02:40.15]Malignance at best, and quick to address yourself
[02:45.02]As anything other than what we've learned to expect
[02:49.49]The patron saint of Good God Damn
[02:54.24]I'll kick myself to sleep
[02:55.91]Before I shake that grimy, dirty, crusted, arrogant hand
[03:00.46]So please leave my house