Shylock:
Ladies and Gentleman
Shylock Productions in association with Pilgrim Enterprises
Presents the Bottom brothers in their touching life story

Troupe:
Who's that coming out of Cornwall
With his brother
It's Nick and Nigel Bottom!

Who's that starting out with nothing
But each other
It's Nick and Nigel Bottom!

Nick & Nigel:
Yes we are the Bottom brothers
Writing plays just like our mother said we oughta do
We've learned a thing or two

Bea:
He almost got us all beheaded (Sorry)

Portia:
Instead we just got banishéded (Yay!)

Nick & Nigel:
We came from London on a boat
We landed here and went and wrote

Nick, Nigel, Bea & Portia:
A play with songs and dancers galore

Bea & Portia:
It's something no one else has ever seen before

Nick & Nigel:
So here we go
Putting on a show
And not just any old ordinary show

Nick, Nigel, Bea & Portia:
A big and bold extraordinary show
A must-see, magical, new, original

All:
Musical
A musical
There's nothing as amazing as a musical
With song and dance
And sweet romance
And happy endings happening by happenstance

And you'll see
It will be
Only the beginning
This glorious creation called a musical

Shylock (Spoken):
Have you heard the news?
Shakespeare's new play opened
They say it's his masterpiece

Nick (Spoken):
What's it called?

Nigel (Spoken):
Hamlet!

Nostradamus (Spoken):
Hamlet
I was this close

All:
Welcome to America
Where nothing rhymes with America
But who's complaining
We're living in the new world
And living the dream
It's our debut

Welcome to America
Where everything is new
Welcome to America
Everything is new
Welcome to America

Nick (Spoken):
Land of opportunity!