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I've got a clear cut case of tennis elbow, |
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And dancing through the green house made me pale so; |
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My amorous advances have been turning rather stale, |
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Oh! |
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Won't you be my Ruby? |
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-Say you love me tonight! |
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Boating on the Serpentine in winter; |
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Left my Plus-Fours feeling somewhat splintered, |
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But every complication leaves my desperate plans unhindered |
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Won't you be my poppet, say you'll marry me today! |
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Lately golf has lost it's old attractions, |
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And crooning in the coalshed makes me blue, |
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- That film inside the picture-house has |
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Vanquished all remaining doubts, |
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I could not love another; |
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Not even Marzo's mother! |
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Silver hairs are sprouting from my cranium, |
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Now cramp has stopped me mining for uranium; |
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I only want to prove your lips can drive me quite insanium. |
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-Won't you wear this ring and say you'll be my bride |
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My playboy blues will then be swept aside, |
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I'll never touch a tennis racket anymore. |