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I was chilling with my BUD, SAM ADAMS. |
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We get a call from MILLER. The man was having spasms. |
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And he said, "dude get dressed. There's not a chance in hell |
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That we could miss this keg party up in SAN MIGUEL." |
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"Do I have to go out, dude?" |
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"No but that Mexican chick CORONA'S there, |
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And she's been asking about you." |
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I hung up the phone. It's time to get dressed, I |
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Put on my MAGIC HAT and my shirt with the RED STRIPE. |
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We hit a BUSCH dodging traffic as we passed by 'em |
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In that KILLIAN'S RED charger with the FAT TIRE(s). |
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We drove around for like half the night. |
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Luckily the BLUE MOON provided NATURAL LIGHT. |
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We rolled up to the party, errybody was rockin', |
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Playing BECK'S old single on that iPod dock and |
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That's where it's at. My ears were all ringing. |
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The party crowd was getting loud, and everyone was all singing: |
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Nana bottles of beer on the wall |
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Nana bottles of beer. |
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You take one down, you pass it around, |
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You got nana bottles of beer on the wall. |
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Now everyone was crammed in the basement, wasted |
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Even ASAHI, that foreign exchange kid. |
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He was just in KINGFISHER, wreckin' his Vette |
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Like "automobile, big leck!" |
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I poured myself a brew and drank half the glass |
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This ugly MOOSEHEAD chick kept grabbing my ass. |
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I told that ugly HARP that she could go to hella |
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And then I saw CORONA, and she was looking STE-STE-STELLA. |
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And down to have some fun, she |
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Was still a freshman, a YUENGLING with a tongue-ring. |
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The alcohol was all clouding my thinking, |
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So I slapped her on the HEINY can I get you a drink? And |
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She said, "ha! You're totally cute. |
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"If you fetch me a beer, I'll let you touch my boob." |
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Hell yeah, I went to get her a drink, then |
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The party started moving, and everybody started singing: |
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Nana bottles of beer on the wall. |
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Nana bottles of beer. |
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You take one down, you pass it around, |
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You got 99 bottles of beer on the wall. |
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CORONA'S ex-boyfriend started talking to me |
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His FOSTERS parents nicknamed him MILWAUKEE'S BEaST. |
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'Cause dude was big enough that he could tackle the world. |
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He was like "Hey Broski, you're jacking my girl. |
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I should bust your SKULL. You look like a queer, I'm |
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Gonna challenge you to a game of beer pong." |
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"Of COURES! Challenge accepted." |
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You can call me GUINNESS, 'cause I'm touting the record." |
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Beer pong's my game, and with my shoulder cocked |
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I bounced that ball in the cup like a ROLLING ROCK. |
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We played for a while, and I was wooing them when |
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I showed everyone who'd win the BLUE RIBBON... PABST |
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And CORONA was like, "wow! |
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You can totally touch my boob now." |
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I was EL PRESIDENTE |
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Or maybe a king with my CORONA |
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In my NEW CASTLE, and everybody started singing: |
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99 bottles of beer on the wall. |
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99 bottles of beer. |
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You take one down, you pass it around, |
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You got 99 bottles of beer on the wall. |
