Couch Potato (Parody of "Lose Yourself" by Eminem)

歌曲 Couch Potato (Parody of "Lose Yourself" by Eminem)
歌手 Weird Al Yankovic
专辑 Poodle Hat

歌词

Look
If you had
One shot
To sit on your lazy butt
And watch all the TV you ever wanted
Until your brain turned to mush
Would you go for it?
Or just let it slip?
Yo
Remote is ready
Eyes wide, palms are sweaty
There's Flintstones on the TV already
Wilma 'n' Betty
No virgin to channel surfin'
And I'm HD-ready
So I flip
Garbage is all I'm getting
There's Simon Cowell
Who folks wanna disembowel
He opens his mouth
Always says something foul
They're dyin', wow
Wannabes are crying now
He votes them out
Time to throw in the towel
Shows based on reality
Oh, the humanity!
Oh, Ozzy's family
Sho' loves profanity
Whoa, the insanity
Oh, dogs that crap and pee
Home of depravity?
No, they live happily
Yo
Plus "Da Ali G Show"
And "Celebrity Mole"
Oh, and there's Anna Nicole
Well, she's scaring me
"Look ma, no cavities"
Oh, it's a station break
Better go out to the kitchen and microwave something
"You're gonna lose your mind watchin' TV" They told me, they'd scold me
But I'd still tune in every show (show)
My cable gets C-SPAN, TV-Land, and HBO
The Travel Channel, Discovery, and Lifetime (yo)
"You're gonna lose your mind watchin' TV"
They told me, cajoled me, "Turn off those music videos" (no)
I'm gonna watch C-SPAN, TV-Land, and HBO
The History Channel and QVC and Lifetime (yo)
(You're gonna)
My butt is aching
As I watch NASCAR racing
That show about undertaking
Larry King
To "24" to "Law And Order"
The Weather Channel's boring like "60 Minutes"'s ancient reporters
Next up on "E! True Hollywood Story"
The rise and decline of twelve actors named Corey
Shows for next fall, they've already been namin'
"CSI: Boise" and "Touched By An Uncle" both sound pretty lame 'n'
So does "Everybody Tolerates Raymond"
And "King of Queens" jumped the shark the first minute
I can't believe Richard Simmons ain't in it
I'll move right on to "8 Simple Rules For Dating My Teenaged Daughter"
Then I bet
I watch "The Bachelorette"
Followed by "Welcome Back, Kotter"
And "The Muppet Show" where they go 'Mahna Mahna'
"You're gonna lose your mind watching TV"
They told me, they'd scold me
But I'd still tune in every show (show)
My cable gets C-SPAN, TV-Land, and HBO
The Disney Channel and A&E and Lifetime (yo)
"You're gonna lose your mind watching TV"
They told me, cajoled me
But I still love Lisa Kudrow (drow)
I'm looking at C-SPAN, TV-Land, and HBO
The Playboy Channel and Court TV and Lifetime (yo)
(You're Gonna)
Never missed "Melrose Place" or "Lost In Space"
I've seen each "Amazing Race" and "Without A Trace"
But I only watched "Will And Grace" one time one day
Wish I hadn't 'cause TiVo now thinks I'm gay
Oh, and "Fear Factor" I watched maybe a half hour
After that, felt like I needed a long shower
Network execs with naked ambitions
"Next week on FOX, watch lions eat Christians"
Like to tie up those programming planners
Make 'em watch all of that junk 'til their heads explode just like "Scanners"
Leech-covered grub-eatin' fools on "Survivor"
Look there's James Lipton discussing the oeuvre of Mr. Rob Schneider
And there's "Gilligan" and "SpongeBob", plus there's "MacGyver"
And Jay Leno has got Madonna, hey there's Luke Perry on a
Special all Pig-Latin episode of "Drew Carey"
Wanna turn on "E.T." 'cause I'm a gossip freak
And I gotta know who J. Lo is marryin' this week
A 30 second spot
Then we come back to "Are You Hot?"
I was planning on recording "The Sopranos"
I forgot
I love shows with or without a plot
I'll stare 'til my legs are numb, my eyes bloodshot
Because I only have got
One brain to rot
I'm gonna spend my life watching television a lot
"You're gonna lose your mind watching TV"
They told me, they'd scold me
But I'd still tune in every show (show)
My cable gets C-SPAN, TV-Land, and HBO
The Sci-Fi Channel and AMC and Lifetime (yo)
"You're gonna lose your mind watching TV"
They told me, cajoled me, "Turn off that Oprah Winfrey show" (no)
I got it on C-SPAN, TV-Land, and HBO
The Learning Channel and MTV and Lifetime (yo)
(You're gonna)
You can watch anything you want to, man

歌词大意

[00:03.051] hēi, rú guǒ nǐ yǒu yí gè jī huì
[00:09.301] yī pì gǔ zuò xià, tān zài shā fā shàng, bǎ suǒ yǒu xiǎng kàn de diàn shì jié mù dōu kàn yī biàn
[00:14.569] kàn dào nǎo jiāng zi jiǎo dōu jiǎo bù dòng, nǐ huì bǎ tā jǐn wò zài shǒu
[00:18.995] hái shì rèn qí liū zǒu
[00:20.505] Yo
[00:21.230] yáo kòng qì jiù wèi, zhǔn bèi hǎo zhēng dà yǎn, shǒu xīn lǐ qìn chū hàn shuǐ
[00:24.246] mó dēng yuán shǐ rén yǐ jīng kāi yǎn, wēi ěr mǎ hé bèi dì zài liáo tiān
[00:27.171] zài gè gè pín dào lǐ áo yóu, zǎo jiù bú shì shén me xīn shǒu, gāo qīng yù bèi
[00:29.660] àn xià kāi guān, jìng zhěng xiē lā jī jié mù gěi rén kàn
[00:32.596] xī méng kǎo wēi ěr yī rù jìng, dà jiā huo ér dōu xiǎng bǎ tā bāo pí chōu jīn
[00:35.273] tā yī zhāng zuǐ, shuō de huà dōu méi fǎ ér tīng
[00:38.212] nèi xiē rén tīng le dōu bù xiǎng huó, xuǎn shǒu men dōu yào kū le
[00:40.653] tā bǎ xuǎn shǒu men dōu táo tài diào, dǎo méi hái zi hái bù huí jiā xǐ xǐ shuì jiào
[00:43.710] yǒu xiē jié mù shì zhēn rén zhēn shì, rén xìng a nǐ qiáo qiáo
[00:46.413] ó ào sī běn yī jiā lǐ tou de rén gē ge mǎn zuǐ zāng huà
[00:49.287] yī jiā zǐ dōu fēng fēng diān diān, tā jiā gǒu yě suí dì dà xiǎo biàn
[00:51.967] pín kùn jiā tíng guò de chà, bù bù tā men de shēng huó kě xìng fú zhe nà
[00:54.770] yō, hái yǒu Ali G gè rén xiù hé shuí shì nèi guǐ míng xīng bǎn
[00:57.925] āi yā zěn me hái yǒu ān nà nī kě, zhǎng de yě tài xià rén le tā
[01:00.780] " mā nǐ kàn, méi yǒu zhù yá" 50 nián dài de jiā jié shì yá gāo guǎng gào cí, a jiā guǎng gào le ya
[01:03.461] chèn zhè huì ér qù chú fáng rè diǎn dōng xī chī ba
[01:05.646] kàn diàn shì zǎo wǎn gěi nǐ kàn shǎ
[01:07.752] měi gè jié mù wǒ dōu kàn, bù guǎn bié rén zěn me shuō zěn me mà
[01:10.817] wǒ de diàn shì yǒu CSPAN TVLand hé HBO
[01:13.910] The Travel Channel, Discovery hái yǒu Lifetime
[01:16.303] kàn diàn shì zǎo wǎn gěi nǐ kàn shǎ
[01:18.719] bié rén xùn wǒ hōng wǒ," bǎ nà yòu chàng yòu tiào de wán yì ér guān le ba"
[01:21.567] bù, wǒ hái dé kàn CSPAN, TVLand hé HBO
[01:24.604] The History Channel hé QVC hái yǒu Lifetime
[01:27.126] nǐ zǎo wǎn......
[01:28.006] pì gǔ yǐn yǐn zuò tòng, wǒ hái zài kàn nà sī kǎ sài chē
[01:30.595] kàn le gè jiào chéng nuò PBS de yí gè yǒu guān zàng lǐ de jié mù de jié mù, lā lǐ jīn xiàn chǎng xiù wǒ yě zài kē
[01:33.807] zài kàn 24 xiǎo shí, zài kàn fǎ lǜ yǔ zhì xù
[01:36.095] tiān qì pín dào wú liáo dé gēn 60 fēn zhōng CBS yí gè zhèng zhì píng lùn jié mù, jiā bīn dōu shì yī xiē nián yú huā jiǎ de lǎo zhèng kè yī ge yàng
[01:38.859] nèi xiē zāo lǎo tóu zi yǒu shén me hǎo kàn de, hái shì huàn tái kàn E! zhēn shí hǎo lái wù gù shì
[01:42.944] " shí èr gè míng jiào kē lǐ de yǎn yuán zhī rén shēng qǐ luò"
[01:45.689] qiū tiān bō de jù zhè huì ér yǐ jīng mìng hǎo míng le
[01:48.533] CSI: bó yī xī Al dù zhuàn de CSI xù jí, yǔ dà shū yǒu yuē Al dù zhuàn de yǔ tiān shǐ yǒu yuē xù jí
[01:51.206] tīng míng zì jiù zhī dào kěn dìng lā jī
[01:52.751] rén rén dōu ài léi méng dé hé
[01:55.412] hòu zhōng zhī wáng shì bú shì gāi wán r wán le
[01:58.079] zhēn shi de zěn me néng bù qǐng lǐ chá dé xī méng sī ne
[02:01.167] huàn tái, kàn bā xiàng zhù yì zhī pào wǒ nǚ ér méi nà me róng yì
[02:04.991] rán hòu wǒ kěn dìng huì kàn wèi hūn nǚ zǐ
[02:07.456] rán hòu zài kàn huān yíng huí lái, kē tè xiān shēng
[02:09.308] hé dà qīng wā bù ǒu xiù, tīng yī qún bù ǒu jī lǐ guā lā
[02:11.653] kàn diàn shì zǎo wǎn gěi nǐ kàn shǎ
[02:13.747] měi gè jié mù wǒ dōu kàn, bù guǎn bié rén zěn me shuō zěn me mà ó
[02:16.730] wǒ de diàn shì yǒu CSPAN TVLand hé HBO
[02:20.029] dí shì ní pín dào hé A E hái yǒu Lifetime
[02:22.456] kàn diàn shì zǎo wǎn gěi nǐ kàn shǎ
[02:25.139] bié rén xùn wǒ hōng wǒ, dàn wǒ jiù shì xǐ huān lì sà kù zhuō
[02:27.987] wǒ hái dé kàn CSPAN, TVLand hé HBO
[02:31.031] huā huā gōng zǐ pín dào hé Court TV hái yǒu Lifetime
[02:33.246] nǐ zǎo wǎn......
[02:33.945] xīn fēi yuè qíng hǎi mí shī tài kōng wǒ měi yī jí dōu kàn
[02:36.486] cóng bù cuò guò yī jí jí sù qián jìn hé xún rén mì tàn
[02:39.511] dàn shì wēi ěr yǔ gé lěi sī wǒ zhǐ kàn le yī cì
[02:41.980] rán hòu TiVo jiù yǐ wéi wǒ shì tóng xìng liàn TiVo huì gēn jù guān kàn jì lù xiàng yòng hù tuī jiàn yǐng piān, yì sī shì zì cóng kàn le Will Grace, TiV jiù kāi shǐ gěi Al tuī jiàn tóng xìng tí cái de yǐng shì jù, xiàn zài hòu huǐ de yào sǐ
[02:44.887] ó, hái yǒu kǒng jù yuán sù, wǒ kàn le dà gài bàn gè xiǎo shí
[02:47.574] wán le xià chū yī shēn lěng hàn dé hǎo hǎo xǐ xǐ
[02:50.625] diàn shì tái dà lǎo men gè gè dōu yǒu zhē bú zhù de yě xīn
[02:53.326] xià xīng qī fú kè sī yǒu gè jié mù yào bō, shī zi bó shā huó rén
[02:56.107] wǒ dōu xiǎng bǎ zhì piàn rén bǎng le
[02:58.747] ràng tā men shǐ jìn kàn kàn zhèi xiē lā jī, kàn dào tā men de nǎo zǐ dōu gēn duó mìng xiōng líng lǐ nà yàng bào diào
[03:02.674] xìng cún zhě lǐ mǎn shēn chóng zi hái chī qū de dōu shì xiē chǔn dàn
[03:05.824] qiáo qiáo yòu shì zhān mǔ sī lì pǔ dùn zài kuò lùn gāo tán
[03:08.403] tán luó bó shī nài dé yī xǐ jù yǎn yuán, qí zuò pǐn dà dū bǐ jiào dī sú de zuò pǐn chéng jiù
[03:09.924] hái yǒu gài lǐ gān de dǎo hé hǎi mián bǎo bǎo
[03:11.151] jiā shang bǎi zhàn tiān lóng dǎ gè bāo
[03:12.746] jié léi nuò qǐng lái le mài dāng nà
[03:14.277] yō, shì lú kè pài ruì ya
[03:15.309] dé lǔ pài lǐ de yīng yǔ hēi huà chū le tè bié jí
[03:17.949] hái shì xiǎng huàn dào ET yú lè pín dào
[03:19.312] yīn wèi wǒ i jiù shì xǐ huān bā guà
[03:20.594] ér qiě hái néng zhī dào zhè zhōu gēn JLo jié hūn de yòu shì shuí
[03:23.447] bàn fēn zhōng guǎng gào zhī hòu
[03:24.526] huān yíng jì xù shōu kàn là bù là
[03:26.152] xiǎng bǎ hēi dào jiā zú lù xià lái de, ràng wǒ gěi wàng le
[03:29.626] bù guǎn yǒu méi yǒu jù qíng, shì gè jié mù wǒ dōu ài
[03:31.503] huì yī zhí dīng zhe píng mù, zhí dào liǎng tuǐ má, yǎn tòng hóng
[03:34.067] wǒ jiù zhè me yí gè nǎo zi
[03:37.235] yú shēng wǒ yào pīn mìng kàn diàn shì, kàn dào nǎo zǐ dōu xiù diào
[03:39.562] kàn diàn shì zǎo wǎn gěi nǐ kàn shǎ
[03:41.874] měi gè jié mù wǒ dōu kàn, bù guǎn bié rén zěn me shuō zěn me mà ó
[03:45.122] wǒ de diàn shì yǒu CSPAN TVLand hé HBO
[03:48.276] The SciFi Channel hé AMC hái yǒu Lifetime
[03:50.550] kàn diàn shì zǎo wǎn gěi nǐ kàn shǎ
[03:52.902] bié rén xùn wǒ hōng wǒ," bǎ ào pǔ lā wēn fú ruì xiù guān le ba"
[03:55.948] bù, wǒ hái dé kàn CSPAN, TVLand hé HBO
[03:59.151] xué xí pín dào hé MTV hái yǒu Lifetime
[04:01.466] nǐ zǎo wǎn......
[04:04.315] nǐ xiǎng kàn shén me jiù kàn shén me, xiōng dì