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So many regrets |
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So many unanswered questions |
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I miss you... |
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Miss you so much... |
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Listen |
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Yo yo yo yo |
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I hope you're somewhere listening to this |
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I wish I knew why you did what you did |
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'Cause I still haven't really come to terms with the truth |
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There must have been something you were determined to prove |
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The lessons you taught me, I can't forget |
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But there's so many unanswered questions |
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Now everything seems meaningless |
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You lived fast and died young |
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But my brother you were a genius |
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How could you ever believe that you'll survive |
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I don't care what they say, that shit was suicide |
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I won't lie, there was much distance between you and I |
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I should've told you not to do it, don't be stupid (why?) |
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You've got looks, got brains and your future's bright |
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Now you're gone I feel like I'm gon' lose my mind |
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I never thought you'd get yourself organised |
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I wish we saw the signs, the shock left us all traumatised |
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These are awful times, and I need more than rhymes |
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'Cause this was more than a tragedy |
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You can't just cheat the forces of gravity |
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You left me here to hold a brave face supporting the family |
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In a way you were dying to live |
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It's ****ed up man, I'm crying while I'm writing this shit |
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Water from my eyes is stopping me from lighting my spliff |
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Why didn't you realise that your life is a gift |
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Mum and Dad don't understand why they've outlived their son |
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Every single CD, Mix Tape and Album to come |
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Is dedicated to none other than my blood brother |
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But I hate you, for the way you made my Mum suffer |
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Words can't explain, how a certain part of my heart hurts with the harshest pain |
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Last time we spoke, we said we weren't brothers and we aren't the same |
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I told myself you were too far past insane |
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How could we not take your death badly |
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I just asked mum and she said your name meant happy |
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But my soul is too cold to laugh |
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My heart bleeds when I'm looking at your old school photograph |
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I wish that I could touch your beautiful flesh |
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I'm writing but we ain't even had the funeral yet |
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Now death is something, that I'm staying ever ready for |
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You had plenty more to give, you weren't even 24 |
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I don't understand why you had to die |
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In a lot of rappers rhymes, death is glamorised |
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Not me, I'll always stay remembering you |
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I should've known this was something you'd eventually do |
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When you got shived, we should've known it was bad |
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The next day I was sitting here consoling my Dad |
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It's like a nightmare, it still doesn't seem real |
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But this is my life, not some ****ing deep film |
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It's the strange feeling I felt in the late night |
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Witnesses said that you fell from a great height |
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Can't be my brother man, tell me it ain't right |
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Right now I'd rather blaze, we could face life |
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Shit what a waste, what a shame |
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I just gotta make sure your life wasn't lost in vain |
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This is my brother, not just a departed friend |
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So hard for my marge and them to start again |
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From now on our lives will never be the same |
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We holding on too tight for the memories to fade |
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24 years was hardly a life |
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On the day you passed, it's like a part of me died |
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I've been scarred many times but this pain is so much worse |
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And it's so much harder to describe |
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You will still be missed |
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I'm sorry we didn't support you, we thought we did |
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I wish I broke your leg so you couldn't jump |
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Now all I can do...is rep your ****in name like I should've done |
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'Cause it's only right |
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I'm still not sleeping, but now I'm seeing your ghost at night |
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We all wish we could've stopped you |
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I know I can't go back in time now, but I want to |
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It's like a tightened knot that I can't undo |
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Why did I have to lose you to realize I loved you |
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Be careful what you wish for, in case it comes true |
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Right now I'm confused, feeling so subdued |
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When they arrested you, they wanted to section you |
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The only thing we did wrong was going and getting you |
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Next morning you was up, not doing what you was meant to do |
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That wasn't the life that you were meant to have |
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That wasn't the way that it was meant to be |
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You were sick, not physically but mentally |
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I still ain't got a fraction of this shit off of my chest |
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All that goes through my mind is them constant regret |
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Why why why did you die for no reason |
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All of a sudden the weathers cold its so freezing |
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Have you ever head the saying, when it rains it pours |
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Don't ever try to tell me my pain is the same as yours |
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'Cause it's not, and everything isn't what it seems |
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I'm pinching myself but I know that this is not a dream |
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Why did you have to do that, this isn't fair |
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Listen my brother, never think that I didn't care |
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There's no words to describe the way that this feels |
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Now I can clearly separate the fake from the real |
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Why did everyone else have to be bro |
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I still can't quiet believe that you're actually gone |
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Just 5 days, 5 days and it feels like the same day |
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Weed ain't helping but I need it just to maintain |
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'Cause the bleak reality is terrible |
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And last night mom was practically hysterical |
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People I thought would care, couldn't care less |
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I need a lot of support 'cause I'm feeling bare stressed |
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And everyone else seems immature |
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I'm being tested, thinking what is there left that I'm living for |
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I need to clear my thoughts, stop thinking and try n breathe |
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Just a week ago I was so innocent and naive |
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Now my insides are burning like hells flames |
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I've realized up until now I've never felt pain |
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It's so evident that everything I cared about before was so irrelevant |
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There's certain people that call when they see that this shit is hurting |
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But I see them for what they are now 'cause I'm a different person |
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R.I.P. |
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I miss you... |
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In fact **** R.I.P |
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I want you to live through me |
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Live through me... |
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Live through me... |
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Live...through...me... |
