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Before Youtube I walked through life. |
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And now I frollic. |
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Youtube has been like a father to me, |
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Except Youtube's not an alcholic. |
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Before Youtube I was just a skinny white kid, |
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That thought he was funnier, & cooler |
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Than he actually was. |
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Now, |
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Not much has changed, |
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But I have a shitload of money. |
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Because Youtube is a place for people to share their ideas. |
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If by people you mean |
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13-year-old girls, |
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And by ideas you mean |
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How they love the Jonas Brothers. |
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I'm just kidding! |
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But let's be honest, |
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That's a hefty majority. |
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And if you don't believe me |
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You must be a noob!... |
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So, Welcome to Youtube! |
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You don't know what your missing, |
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A-just try searching a-women kissing. |
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It's Youtube. It's what this country's been needing. |
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A generation of kids who don't waste their time reading. |
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Am I the only one who thinks that Lisa Nova's hot, |
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And Chris Crocker's not? |
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He's hotter. |
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Most Famous youtubers are either asian or they're gay. |
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So there's an untapped youtube celebrity, and it's name is Geore Takai. |
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And if your favorite coat has got a doo-doo stain; I pray to god that that's chocolate rain. |
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And I find videos of babys laughing a bit intrusive. |
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Because Barrak Obama won the election because of Youtube. |
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Wait, did I say youtube? |
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I meant the black vote. |
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And I think that Youtube and FRED are SO COOL! |
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And What The Buck will be back in a jiffy lube... |
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So welcome to Youtube. |
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Yeah, I said welcome to Youtube. |
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Hey. Welcome to youtube. |
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I said listen and linger. |
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Charlie the unicorn bit my finger. |
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It's youtube. |
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The impact is evident. |
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Ms. Teen South Carolina just ran for vice president. |
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Upload a video. |
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You got nothin' to lose. |
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Except all of you friends. |
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And the approval of your parents. |
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Hi, my name is Mary and I'm 19 years old and I got drunk at a party and I think someone was videotaping it but I don't want anyone to see it 'cause I showed half of my boob. |
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Sorry Mary! |
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Welcome to Youtube. |
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Say hello to youtube. |
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Say goodbye to your college scholarship. |
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Yeah, and it'll keep on going and it'll never stop. |
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'Till it's privatized. |