| I read a news today, oh boy, | |
| About a lucky man who made a grade, | |
| And though the news was rather sad, | |
| Well, I just had to laugh. | |
| I saw the photograph. | |
| He blew his mind out in a car, | |
| He didn't notice that the lights have changed, | |
| A crowd of people stood and stared, | |
| They've seen his face before, | |
| Nobody was really sure if he was from the House of Lords. | |
| I saw a film today, oh boy, | |
| The English army had just won the war, | |
| A crowd of people turned away, | |
| But I just had a look, | |
| Having read a book, I'd like to turn you on... | |
| Woke up, fell out of bed, | |
| dragged a comb across my head, | |
| found my way downstairs and drank a cup, | |
| and looking up I noticed I was late. | |
| Found my coat and grabbed my head, | |
| made the bus in second flat, | |
| found my way upstairs and had a smoke, | |
| and somebody spoke and I went into a dream | |
| I read a news today, oh boy, | |
| four thousand holes in Blackburn Lancashire, | |
| and though the holes were rather small, | |
| they had to count them all, | |
| now they know how many holes it takes to fill the Albert Hall, | |
| I'd love to turn you on. |
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