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Now here's a little story |
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To tell it is a must |
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About an unsung hero |
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That moves away your dust |
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Some people make a fortune |
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Other's earn a mint |
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My old man don't earn much |
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In fact....he's flippin'.....skint |
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Oh, my old man's a dustman |
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He wears a dustman's hat |
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He wears cor blimey trousers |
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And he lives in a council flat |
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He looks a proper narner |
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In his great big hob nailed boots |
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He's got such a job to pull em up |
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That he calls them daisy roots |
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Some folks give tips at Christmas |
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And some of them forget |
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So when he picks their bins up |
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He spills some on the steps |
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Now one old man got nasty |
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And to the council wrote |
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Next time my old man went 'round there |
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He punched him up the throat |
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Oh, my old man's a dustman |
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He wears a dustman's hat |
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He wears cor blimey trousers |
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And he lives in a council flat |
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I say, I say Duncan |
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I 'er...I found a police dog in my dustbin |
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How do you know he's a police dog |
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He had a policeman with him |
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Though my old man's a dustman |
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He's got a heart of gold |
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He got married recently |
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Though he's 86 years old |
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We said 'Ear! Hang on Dad |
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you're getting past your prime' |
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He said 'Well when you get to my age' |
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'It helps to pass the time' |
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Oh, my old man's a dustman |
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He wears a dustman's hat |
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He wears cor blimey trousers |
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And he lives in a council flat |
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I say, I say, I say |
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My dustbins full of lillies |
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Well throw 'em away then |
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I can't Lilly's wearing them |
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Now one day while in a hurry |
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He missed a lady's bin |
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He hadn't gone but a few yards |
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When she chased after him |
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'What game do you think you're playing' |
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She cried right from the heart |
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'You've missed me...am I too late' |
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'No... jump up on the cart' |
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Oh, my old man's a dustman |
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He wears a dustman's hat |
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He wears cor blimey trousers |
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And he lives in a council flat |
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I say, I say, I say What you again |
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My dustbin's absolutely full with toadstools |
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How do you know it's full |
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'Cos there's not much room inside |
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He found a tiger's head one day |
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Nailed to a piece of wood |
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The tiger looked quite miserable |
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But I suppose it should |
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Just then from out a window |
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A voice began to wail |
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He said Oi! Where's me tiger head |
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Four foot from it's tail |
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Oh, my old man's a dustman |
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He wears a dustman's hat |
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He wears cor blimey trousers |
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And he lives in a council flat |
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Next time you see a dustman |
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Looking all pale and sad |
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Don't kick him in the dustbin |
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It might be my old dad |