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It's a troubled world |
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Have you seen the news |
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Kids of today in a haze of booze |
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Someone wake me up from this crazy dream |
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Little Janie's got a date with Jim Beam |
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But this horrible curse |
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Oh it just keeps getting worse |
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A kids birthday party |
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Sponsored by Bacardi |
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Put down that momosa |
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Wingardium Leviosa |
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Janie what have you been thinking |
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Expliarmus teenage drinking |
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Let Harry Potter kick your habit |
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So drop that drink just sorting hat it |
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Jordan what are you doing? |
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Harry Potter |
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Why? |
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He is the best |
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Yeah look but that's not what the songs about |
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No but is what the songs about |
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Harry Potter has a magic wand |
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And with his magic wand Harry Potter can stop teenage drinking |
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What? |
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In fact Harry Potter can solve all of the worlds problems |
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Listen... |
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He'll stop hunger, put an end to pollution |
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Yeah Harry Potter is the ultimate solution |
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He'll stop global warming and all the rape |
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Just like he stopped Professor Snape |
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So let your cauldron bubble |
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And lets all forget our troubles |
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Dont be feeling down or depressed |
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Just climb aboard the Hogwarts Express |
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Forget all you sins |
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Come with Ron and the Weasley twins |
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If your wife is being a whore |
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50 points to Griffyndor |
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If your burnt by a Goblet of Fire |
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Just jump on your broomstick |
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It's time to get higher |
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Yo whether your a muggle, a wizard or a witch |
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If you got that itch then catch that snitch |
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He'll solve your problems no matter how tragic |
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Harry Potter, He's fucking magic |
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No cure for AIDS, So you thought |
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He'll smack it down just like Voldemort |
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He'll never admit defeat about Harry |
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Yeah if he were blind who would make me see |
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Slytherin and Ravenclaw even Hufflepuff and Gryffindor |
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Open the door get on the floor, everyone do the Dumbledore |
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Come on Benny dont be a stranger |
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Aloha Mora, Hermione Granger |
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But I cant read |
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Dont weep or cry |
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there's books on tape by Stephen Fry |
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So if your looking for that extra jolt |
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Choose that boy who lived with the lighting bolt (on his forehead) |
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And here's one extra final piece of news yeah |
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Got to stop those animals escaping from Zoos |
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Something else for all of you non-believers |
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The people responsible are careless Zookeepers |
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Late at nights when they leave open the cages |
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I find it, We find it, Outrageous |
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Outrageous |