| [00:05.89] |
So how was Joan? qióng ān hǎo bù hǎo? |
| [00:07.22] |
Broke up with her. gēn tā fēn shǒu le |
| [00:08.75] |
Oh, why? wèi shí me? |
| [00:09.86] |
Don' t tell me. Because of the big nostril thing? bié gào sù wǒ yīn wèi bí kǒng tài dà? |
| [00:13.76] |
They were huge! zhēn de chāo dà! |
| [00:16.40] |
When she sneezed, bats flew out of them. tā dǎ pēn tì shí huì yǒu biān fú fēi chū lái |
| [00:19.73] |
They were not that huge. méi nà me dà |
| [00:21.83] |
I' m telling you, she leaned back, I could see her brain. dāng tā yǎng qǐ tóu shí wǒ kě yǐ kàn dào tā de nǎo zi |
| [00:27.04] |
How many women will you reject... nǐ dào dǐ yào jù jué duō shǎo hǎo nǚ hái |
| [00:29.01] |
... over superficial, insignificant things zhǐ shì yīn wèi fēi cháng fū qiǎn de shì qíng? |
| [00:31.58] |
Hold it. I gotta side with Chandler on this one. màn zhe, wǒ bì xū bāng qián dé shuō huà |
| [00:34.51] |
When I first moved here, I went out with this girl. wǒ gāng bān dào zhè lǐ shí yǔ yí gè nǚ hái jiāo wǎng |
| [00:37.28] |
Really hot. Great kisser... fēi cháng rè qíng, hěn huì jiē wěn |
| [00:40.02] |
... but she had the biggest Adam' s apple. dàn shì tā de hóu jié fēi cháng dà lì! |
| [00:44.12] |
Drove me nuts. zhēn shì ràng wǒ shòu bù liǎo |
| [00:46.93] |
You or me? I got it. nǐ hái shì wǒ? wǒ lái hǎo le |
| [00:49.73] |
Joey, women don' t have Adam' s apples. qiáo yī, nǚ rén méi yǒu hóu jié |
| [00:59.94] |
You guys are messing with me, right? nǐ men shì zài piàn wǒ, duì bú duì? |
| [01:04.11] |
Yeah. We are! duì, wǒ men zài piàn nǐ! |
| [01:07.11] |
That' s a good one. For a second there, I was like, whoa! zhēn hǎo xiào wǒ chà diǎn shàng dàng le |
| [01:17.88] |
liù rén xíng dì 2 jì dì 03 jí hǎi xiān shēng zhī sǐ |
| [01:59.43] |
You name one woman that you broke up with for an actual real reason. nǐ yǔ něi gè nǚ yǒu fēn shǒu shì yīn wèi zhèng dāng de lǐ yóu? |
| [02:05.00] |
Maureen Rasillo. mò lín luó xī luò |
| [02:06.11] |
Because she doesn' t hate Yanni is not a real reason. yīn wèi tā bù tǎo yàn yīn yuè jiā yǎ ní zhè bú shì gè zhèng dāng de lǐ yóu |
| [02:14.25] |
Hello, Mr. Heckles. hāi, hā kè xiān shēng |
| [02:17.00] |
You' re doing it again. nǐ men yòu lái le |
| [02:18.65] |
We' re not doing anything. wǒ men shén me dōu méi zuò |
| [02:20.05] |
You' re stomping. It' s disturbing my birds. nǐ men jiǎo bù shēng tài xiǎng xià dào le wǒ de niǎo ér |
| [02:24.76] |
You don' t have birds. nǐ méi yǒu yǎng niǎo |
| [02:27.89] |
I could have birds. wǒ kě yǐ yǎng niǎo |
| [02:30.73] |
We' ll try to keep it down. wǒ men huì xiǎo shēng yì diǎn |
| [02:32.90] |
Thank you. xiè xiè |
| [02:34.40] |
I' m going to rejoin my dinner party. wǒ yào huí qù jì xù yàn kè le |
| [02:37.77] |
All right, byebye. hǎo, zài jiàn |
| [02:41.14] |
Okay, Janice. duì le, zhēn nī sī |
| [02:42.41] |
Give me Janice. That wasn' t about being picky. zhēn nī sī kě yǐ zhèng míng wǒ bìng méi yǒu luàn tiāo tī |
| [02:45.48] |
We' ll give you Janice. wǒ men tóng yì nǐ yǔ zhēn nī sī fēn shǒu |
| [02:46.81] |
I miss Janice, though. dàn wǒ mán xiǎng zhēn nī sī de |
| [02:49.00] |
Hello, Chandler Bing! hāi, qián dé bǎo! |
| [02:53.29] |
Oh, my God! ō, wǒ de tiān! |
| [02:57.19] |
Oh, Chandler! ō, qián dé! |
| [02:59.02] |
Now! Now! xiàn zài jiù yào! |
| [03:03.80] |
That' s it. duì le |
| [03:05.50] |
There! Faster! duì le! kuài yì diǎn! |
| [03:15.11] |
Stop with the broom! We' re not making noise! bié yòng sào bǎ le! wǒ men méi yǒu zhì zào zào yīn! |
| [03:28.82] |
We won. wǒ men yíng le |
| [03:30.19] |
We did it! wǒ men shèng lì le! |
| [03:35.09] |
Mr. Heckles! hā kè xiān shēng! |
| [03:40.80] |
How did this happen? He was sweeping. zěn me fā shēng de? tā dà gài zài sǎo dì |
| [03:43.47] |
They found a broom in his hand. tā men fā xiàn tā zhuā zhe yī bǎ sào bǎ |
| [03:48.81] |
That' s terrible. I know. zhēn zāo gāo wǒ zhī dào |
| [03:50.94] |
I was sweeping yesterday. zuó tiān wǒ yě zài sǎo dì |
| [03:53.15] |
It could' ve been me. gǎo bù hǎo yě huì yī mìng wū hū |
| [03:56.78] |
Sweeping. You never know. sǎo dì, zhēn shì tiān yǒu bù cè fēng yún |
| [03:58.85] |
Never know. shì shì nán liào |
| [04:04.49] |
It' s very faint, but I can still sense him in the building. hěn wēi ruò dàn wǒ hái kě yǐ gǎn jué tā zài dà lóu lǐ |
| [04:09.20] |
Go into the light, Mr. Heckles! jìn rù guāng máng zhōng, hā kè xiān shēng! |
| [04:15.40] |
Okay, Phoebe. hǎo le, fēi bǐ |
| [04:17.57] |
I' m sorry, but sometimes they need help. duì bù qǐ yǒu shí hou tā men xū yào bāng zhù |
| [04:22.14] |
Here we go. yòu lái le |
| [04:23.24] |
That' s fine, go ahead and scoff. hěn hǎo, cháo xiào wǒ ba |
| [04:26.00] |
There are a lot of things I don' t believe in... wǒ bù xiāng xìn hěn duō shì qíng |
| [04:28.68] |
... but that doesn' t mean they' re not true. dàn zhè bù biǎo shì jiù bú shì zhēn de |
| [04:31.02] |
Such as? pì rú shén me shì? |
| [04:32.55] |
Like crop circles or the Bermuda Triangle or evolution. xiàng shì yù mǐ tián tú àn huò bǎi mù dá sān jiǎo huò yǎn huà lùn |
| [04:41.00] |
What, you don' t believe in evolution? nǐ bù xiāng xìn jìn huà lùn? |
| [04:43.53] |
Not really. bù zhēn de xiāng xìn |
| [04:47.37] |
You don' t believe in evolution? nǐ bù xiāng xìn jìn huà lùn? |
| [04:49.37] |
I don' t know. It' s just, you know.... wǒ bù zhī dào, zhǐ shì |
| [04:51.74] |
Monkeys, Darwin, it' s a nice story. I just think it' s a little too easy. hóu zi, dá ěr wén, hěn hǎo de gù shì wǒ zhǐ shì jué de yǒu diǎn tài jiǎn dān |
| [04:59.91] |
" Too easy"? Too tài jiǎn dān? tài |
| [05:02.92] |
The process of every living thing on this planet evolving... zhè gè xīng qiú shàng de yī qiè shēng wù jīng guò shù qiān wàn nián |
| [05:06.55] |
... over millions of years from singlecelled organisms is " too easy"? cóng dān xì bāo wēi shēng wù jìn huà ér chéng ér nǐ shuō tài jiǎn dān? |
| [05:11.69] |
Yeah, I just don' t buy it. duì, wǒ bù tài xiāng xìn |
| [05:14.59] |
Excuse me. Evolution is not for you to buy, Phoebe. duì bù qǐ jìn huà lùn bú shì xìn bù xìn yóu nǐ, fēi bǐ |
| [05:19.06] |
Evolution is scientific fact, like the air we breathe... jìn huà lùn shì kē xué shì shí jiù xiàng wǒ men hū xī de kōng qì |
| [05:23.10] |
... Iike gravity. jiù xiàng dì xīn yǐn lì |
| [05:24.87] |
Don' t get me started on gravity. bié gēn wǒ tí qǐ dì xīn yǐn lì |
| [05:32.44] |
You don' t believe in gravity? nǐ bù xiāng xìn dì xīn yǐn lì? |
| [05:35.55] |
Well, it' s not so much that, you know, I don' t believe in it. dào bú shì xiāng bù xiāng xìn de wèn tí |
| [05:39.82] |
Lately I get the feeling that... zuì jìn wǒ gǎn jué dào |
| [05:41.92] |
... I' m not so much being pulled down as I am being pushed. wǒ bú shì bèi xī zhù, ér shì bèi yā zhe |
| [05:45.39] |
Pushed. bèi yā zhe |
| [05:48.79] |
It' s lsaac Newton and he' s pissed. nà shi niú dùn, tā fēi cháng huǒ dà |
| [05:54.33] |
There she is. And over there, that' s the other one. tā zài nà biān, nà lǐ hái yǒu lìng yí gè |
| [05:57.77] |
This is Mr. Buddy Doyle, Heckles' attorney. zhè shì bó dì dù ěr hā kè de lǜ shī |
| [06:00.24] |
He' d like to talk to you. tā xiǎng gēn nǐ men tán tán |
| [06:01.74] |
What can we do for you? yǒu hé guì gàn? |
| [06:03.14] |
All right, kids, here' s the deal. hǎo le, hái zi men shì qíng shì zhè yàng de |
| [06:05.44] |
According my client' s will... gēn jù wǒ kè hù de yí péng |
| [06:07.68] |
... he wants to leave all his earthly possessions... tā yào bǎ tā suǒ yǒu cái chǎn |
| [06:12.48] |
... to " the noisy girls in the apartment above mine." dōu liú gěi lóu shàng chǎo nào de nǚ hái men |
| [06:17.76] |
What about his family? tā de jiā rén ne? |
| [06:19.16] |
He didn' t have any. tā méi yǒu jiā rén |
| [06:22.59] |
Okay, so let' s talk money. hǎo, ràng wǒ men kàn kàn yǒu duō shǎo qián |
| [06:26.63] |
All right, there was none. hǎo, méi yǒu bàn máo qián |
| [06:28.20] |
Now, let' s talk signing. xiàn zài, wǒ men lái qiān zì |
| [06:30.10] |
You be noisy girl number one. You be noisy girl number two. nǐ shì yī hào chǎo nào nǚ hái nǐ shì èr hào chǎo nào nǚ hái |
| [06:34.87] |
I can' t believe that this whole time we thought he hated us. wǒ zhēn bù xiāng xìn wǒ men yī zhí yǐ wéi tā tǎo yàn wǒ men |
| [06:38.28] |
Isn' t it amazing how much you can touch someone' s life... zhēn shì bù kě sī yì wǒ men néng rú cǐ gǎn dòng qí tā rén |
| [06:42.00] |
... without even knowing it? ér zì jǐ què bù zhī dào? |
| [06:44.18] |
Would you look at this dump? kàn kàn zhè gè zhū wō?! |
| [06:45.88] |
He hated us! This was his final revenge! tā tòng hèn wǒ men! zhè shì tā zuì zhōng de bào fù! |
| [06:48.45] |
I' ve never seen so much crap! wǒ cóng lái méi kàn guò zhè me duō fèi wù! |
| [06:51.00] |
Actually, I think this apartment sullies the good name of crap. wǒ jué de zhè jiān gōng yù wǔ rǔ le fèi wù de měi míng |
| [06:55.53] |
Check this out. kàn kàn zhè gè |
| [06:59.13] |
Can I have this? zhè gè néng gěi wǒ ma? |
| [07:02.07] |
How can you not believe in evolution? nǐ zěn me néng bù xiāng xìn jìn huà lùn? |
| [07:05.84] |
I don' t know, just don' t. Look at this funky shirt! wǒ bù zhī dào, jiù shì bù xiāng xìn kàn kàn zhè tiáo guài chèn shān! |
| [07:09.64] |
Pheebs, I' ve studied evolution my entire adult life. fēi bǐ wǒ zhěng gè chéng nián dōu zài yán jiū jìn huà lùn |
| [07:12.71] |
And we' ve collected fossils from all over the world... wǒ men cóng shì jiè gè dì sōu jí huà shí |
| [07:16.35] |
... that actually show the evolution of different species. néng gòu zhèng míng bù tóng wù zhǒng de jìn huà lùn |
| [07:20.02] |
I mean, you can literally see them... kě yǐ zhēn zhèng kàn dào tā men |
| [07:23.00] |
... evolving through time. tòu guò shí jiān jìn huà |
| [07:27.66] |
Really? You can actually see it? zhēn de? kě yǐ kàn de dào? |
| [07:29.93] |
You bet! In the U. S., China, Africa, all over! qiān zhēn wàn què! zài měi guó zhōng guó, fēi zhōu, quán shì jiè! |
| [07:35.27] |
See, I didn' t know that. zhè wǒ bù zhī dào |
| [07:37.77] |
Well, there you go. zhè jiù shì ba |
| [07:41.67] |
So now the real question is, who put those fossils there and why? suǒ yǐ zhēn de wèn tí shì shuí bǎ huà shí fàng zài nà li? wèi shí me? |
| [07:50.58] |
Look at this! My Big Book of Grievances. kàn kàn zhè gè! wǒ de tòng kǔ zhī shū |
| [07:56.72] |
Hey, there' s me! hēi, zhè shì wǒ! |
| [07:59.02] |
" April 1 7th, excessive noise... sì yuè shí qī rì, zào yīn guò dù |
| [08:02.03] |
... Italian guy comes home with a date." yì dà lì lǎo dài le nǚ bàn huí jiā |
| [08:05.76] |
You' re in here too. nǐ yě zài lǐ miàn |
| [08:07.57] |
" April 1 8th, excessive noise... sì yuè shí bā rì, zào yīn guò dù |
| [08:10.20] |
... Italian guy' s gay roommate brings home dry cleaning." yì dà lì lǎo de tóng xìng liàn shì yǒu dài le gān xǐ yī fú huí jiā |
| [08:20.81] |
Well, that' s excellent. zhēn shì tài hǎo le |
| [08:23.92] |
Look at this lamp. kàn kàn zhè zhǎn dēng |
| [08:25.48] |
Is this tacky or what? We have to have this. zhēn shì gòu sú le wǒ men yí dìng yào dài huí qù! |
| [08:29.12] |
I think we have enough regular lamps. wǒ men de hǎo tái dēng gòu duō le |
| [08:31.56] |
What? Come on, it' s not like... shén me? hǎo la, wǒ yòu bú shì |
| [08:33.89] |
... I' m asking for this girlie clock or anything. yào zhè gè měi nǚ shí zhōng huò shén me de |
| [08:36.83] |
Which, by the way, I also think is really cool. dàn wǒ jué de zhè gè yě hěn kù |
| [08:40.60] |
Look, it doesn' t go with any of my stuff. tīng zhe, tā yǔ wǒ de dōng xī dōu bù dā pèi |
| [08:44.17] |
Well, what about my stuff? nà me wǒ de dōng xī ne? |
| [08:46.81] |
You don' t have any stuff. nǐ méi yǒu rèn hé dōng xī |
| [08:49.48] |
You still think of it as your apartment, don' t you? nǐ hái shì rèn wéi nà shi nǐ de gōng yù duì bú duì? |
| [08:54.28] |
Yes, you do. duì, nǐ shì zhè me xiǎng |
| [08:55.61] |
You think of it as your apartment and I just rent a room. nǐ bǎ tā xiǎng chéng shì nǐ de gōng yù wǒ zhǐ shì zū le gè fáng jiān |
| [09:01.82] |
While you " mmm" on that, I' ll go find a place for my new lamp. nǐ zhī zhī wú wú de shí hòu wǒ huì wèi wǒ de xīn tái dēng zhǎo gè dì fāng fàng |
| [09:09.19] |
Okay, Pheebs. See how I' m making these little toys move? fēi bǐ kàn wǒ wán zhèi xiē xiǎo wán jù |
| [09:16.00] |
Opposable thumbs! kě duì lì de mǔ zhǐ! |
| [09:19.04] |
Without evolution, how do you explain opposable thumbs? méi yǒu jìn huà lùn zěn me fā zhǎn chū kě duì lì de mǔ zhǐ? |
| [09:24.44] |
Maybe the Overlords needed them to steer their spacecrafts. yě xǔ wài xīng zhǔ zǎi xū yào mǔ zhǐ cái néng gòu jià shǐ fēi dié |
| [09:29.72] |
Tell me you' re joking. qǐng shuō nǐ shì zài kāi wán xiào |
| [09:31.32] |
Look, can' t we say that you believe in something and I don' t? néng bù néng shuō nǐ xiāng xìn jìn huà lùn ér wǒ bù xiāng xìn? |
| [09:35.49] |
No, Pheebs, we can' t. Why not? bù xíng, fēi bǐ, bù néng zhè yàng wèi shí me bù xíng? |
| [09:38.46] |
What is this obsessive need to make everybody agree with you? wèi shí me fēi děi měi ge rén dōu tóng yì nǐ? |
| [09:42.49] |
No, what' s that all about? You know what I think? zhè shì zěn me huí shì? nǐ zhī dào wǒ zěn me xiǎng ma? |
| [09:45.56] |
I think maybe it' s time you put Ross under the microscope. wǒ xiǎng nǐ yě xǔ yīng gāi hǎo hǎo jiǎn shì yī xià luó sī zhè gè shēng wù le |
| [09:55.00] |
Is there blood coming out of my ears? wǒ ěr duǒ yǒu méi yǒu liú xiě? |
| [09:59.65] |
Check it out. Heckles' highschool yearbook. kàn kàn zhè gè hā kè de gāo zhōng tóng xué lù |
| [10:03.85] |
He looks so normal! tā kàn qǐ lái hǎo zhèng cháng! |
| [10:05.38] |
He' s even kind of cute. shèn zhì yǒu diǎn kě ài |
| [10:07.59] |
" Heckles, you crack me up in science class. " hā kè nǐ shàng kē xué kè zǒng shì ràng wǒ pěng fù dà xiào" |
| [10:10.16] |
You' re the funniest kid in school." " nǐ shì quán xiào zuì yǒu qù de xué shēng" |
| [10:12.39] |
Funniest? Heckles? That' s what it says. zuì yǒu qù? hā kè? shàng miàn shì zhè yàng xiě de |
| [10:15.93] |
Heckles was voted class clown, and so was l. hā kè bèi xuǎn wèi bān shàng de huó bǎo wǒ yě shì |
| [10:21.10] |
He was right! Would you listen to that? tā shuō de duì! tīng tīng nà gè zào yīn? |
| [10:23.57] |
I' d call that excessive. dí què shì hěn chǎo nào |
| [10:26.84] |
What? shén me? |
| [10:27.94] |
Heckles played clarinet in band, and I played clarinet. hā kè zài yuè duì yǎn zòu shù dí wǒ yě shì |
| [10:31.51] |
He was in the scale modeler' s club and I was tā cān jiā mó xíng jù lè bù wǒ yě |
| [10:34.85] |
There was no club, but I sure thought they were cool. suī rán wǒ de xué xiào méi yǒu jù lè bù dàn wǒ jué de mó xíng hěn kù |
| [10:38.35] |
So? You were both dorks. suǒ yǐ nǐ men liǎng gè dōu shì shū dāi zi |
| [10:41.35] |
Big deal. méi shén me zhí de dà jīng xiǎo guài |
| [10:42.62] |
I just think it' s weird, you know? Heckles and me wǒ jué de hěn guài, hā kè yǔ wǒ |
| [10:46.12] |
Heckles and me. Me hā kè yǔ wǒ, wǒ |
| [10:48.36] |
Me and Heckles. wǒ yǔ hā kè |
| [10:49.93] |
Hey, would you knock it off! wèi, bié chǎo hǎo bù hǎo! |
| [11:10.32] |
Have you been here all night? nǐ zhěng wǎn dōu zài zhè lǐ? |
| [11:12.28] |
Look at this. kàn kàn zhè gè |
| [11:14.22] |
Pictures of all the women Heckles went out with. hā kè jiāo wǎng guò de nǚ rén zhào piān |
| [11:16.32] |
Look what he wrote on them. " Vivian, too tall." kàn kàn tā zài shàng miàn xiě de " wēi ān, tài gāo dà" |
| [11:20.29] |
" Madge, big gums." " mǎ jī, yá yín tài duō" |
| [11:23.16] |
" Too loud." " tài dà shēng" |
| [11:24.46] |
" Too smart." " Makes noise when she eats." " tài cōng míng" " chī dōng xī fā chū shēng yīn" |
| [11:26.77] |
This is me. zhè jiù shì wǒ |
| [11:28.67] |
This is what I do. zhè jiù shì wǒ de zuò fǎ |
| [11:32.17] |
I' m gonna end up alone, just like he did. wǒ huì xiàng tā yí yàng gū dú zhōng lǎo |
| [11:34.84] |
Heckles was a nut case. hā kè shì gè shén jīng bìng |
| [11:36.74] |
Our trains are on the same track. wǒ men de rén shēng dào lù fāng xiàng yí yàng |
| [11:38.91] |
I' m coming up 30 years behind him, but the stops are all the same. wǒ bǐ tā wǎn le 30 nián dàn zhōng diǎn dōu shì yí yàng |
| [11:42.65] |
Bitter Town... chóu kǔ chéng |
| [11:44.65] |
... Aloneville, Hermit Junction! gū dú zhèn, yǐn shì cūn! |
| [11:48.82] |
You know what we gotta do? Get you out of here. wǒ men yīng gāi lí kāi zhè lǐ |
| [11:51.42] |
I' ll buy you breakfast. wǒ qǐng nǐ chī zǎo cān |
| [11:53.33] |
What if I never find somebody? Or worse, what if I found her... yào shì wǒ yī zhí zhǎo bu dào bàn lǚ? huò gèng zāo de, wǒ yǐ jīng zhǎo dào le |
| [11:56.43] |
... but I dumped her because she pronounces it," supposably"? dàn wǒ què yīn wèi tā shuō" hòu xǔ" jiù shuǎi le tā? |
| [12:01.00] |
Chandler, come on, you' re gonna find somebody. qián dé, hǎo la nǐ huì zhǎo dào duì xiàng de |
| [12:04.27] |
How do you know that? How? nǐ zěn me zhī dào? |
| [12:06.34] |
I don' t know. I' m just trying to help you out. wǒ bù zhī dào wǒ zhǐ shì xiǎng bāng nǐ xià tái |
| [12:10.14] |
You guys will all get married... nǐ men jiāng lái dōu huì jié hūn |
| [12:12.28] |
... and I' ll end up alone. wǒ huì gū dú yī rén |
| [12:14.51] |
Will you promise me something? nǐ néng bù néng dā yìng wǒ yī jiàn shì? |
| [12:16.38] |
When you' re married, will you invite me over for holidays? nǐ jié hūn hòu guò jié shí néng bù néng qǐng wǒ qù wán? |
| [12:20.19] |
I don' t know what we' ll be doing. wǒ bù zhī dào wǒ men huì zěn me yàng |
| [12:24.86] |
I mean, what if we' re over at her folks' place? yào shì wǒ yǔ qī zǐ dào wǒ yuè fù mǔ nà lǐ guò jié ne? |
| [12:30.33] |
Yeah, I understand. wǒ liǎo jiě |
| [12:35.63] |
You can come over and watch the Super Bowl. nǐ kě yǐ guò lái kàn chāo jí bēi |
| [12:38.24] |
Every year, all right? měi yī nián dōu lái, zěn me yàng? |
| [12:41.41] |
You know what? I' m not gonna end up like this. wǒ bú yào xiàng zhè yàng zi xià chǎng! |
| [12:45.01] |
I' ll see you, man. dāi huì jiàn, xiōng dì |
| [12:56.42] |
" Supposably." " hòu xǔ" |
| [13:00.59] |
Supposably! " hòu xǔ"! |
| [13:04.66] |
Did they go to the zoo? tā men qù dòng wù yuán le ma? |
| [13:07.10] |
Supposably. " hòu xǔ" ba |
| [13:21.88] |
Hi. It' s me. hāi, shì wǒ |
| [13:26.00] |
Oh, my God! wǒ de tiān! |
| [13:30.06] |
Janice? You called Janice? zhēn nī sī? nǐ dǎ gěi zhēn nī sī? |
| [13:34.00] |
Yes. Janice. shì de, zhēn nī sī |
| [13:35.36] |
Why is that difficult to comprehend? yǒu shén me nán dǒng de? |
| [13:37.53] |
You remember Janice, right? nǐ hái jì de zhēn nī sī ba? |
| [13:40.90] |
Yes. She was smart, she was pretty and she honestly cared about me. shì a, tā hěn cōng míng, hěn piào liàng ér qiě hěn guān xīn wǒ |
| [13:45.70] |
Janice is my last chance to have somebody. zhēn nī sī shì wǒ de zuì hòu yí gè xī wàng |
| [13:55.45] |
Oh, my God! ō, tiān a! |
| [13:59.65] |
Jeez, look how fat she got. tā zhēn shì pàng liǎo bù shǎo |
| [14:03.32] |
Hey, it' s everybody! Hi, Janice. hāi, dà jiā dōu zài zhè lǐ! hāi, zhēn nī sī |
| [14:07.29] |
Janice, you' re.... zhēn nī sī, nǐ |
| [14:08.66] |
Yes, I am. shì de, wǒ yǒu le |
| [14:11.46] |
ls it? ls it yours? shì bú shì shì bú shì nǐ de? |
| [14:13.57] |
You wish, Chandler Bing! méi nà me hǎo de shì, qián dé bǎo! |
| [14:16.30] |
You are looking at a married lady now. wǒ yǐ jīng shì shào nǎi ni le |
| [14:24.91] |
Congratulations. gōng xǐ |
| [14:27.00] |
Sweetie, I' m sorry. tián xīn, zhēn bào qiàn |
| [14:29.48] |
You couldn' t tell me on the phone? nǐ bù néng zài diàn huà shàng gào sù wǒ ma? |
| [14:31.62] |
And what? Miss the expression on your face? Oh, no! yào wǒ cuò guò kàn dào nǐ de biǎo qíng? cái bú yào! |
| [14:34.79] |
Janice likes to have her fun! zhēn nī sī xǐ huān lè zǐ! |
| [14:49.94] |
You know what we haven' t played in a while? nǐ zhī dào wǒ men hěn jiǔ méi wán shén me ma? |
| [14:53.00] |
Hide the lamp. cáng qǐ tái dēng |
| [14:56.61] |
Monica, let it go. mó nī kǎ, suàn le ba |
| [14:59.71] |
Did you know I' m allergic to shellfish? nǐ zhī dào wǒ duì bèi lèi guò mǐn ma? |
| [15:01.78] |
Then you' ll just have to eat the other lamps. nà me nǐ bì xū chī qí tā de tái dēng |
| [15:08.00] |
It' s scary scientist man. kě pà de kē xué jiā lái le |
| [15:13.29] |
Okay, Phoebe, this is it. fēi bǐ, zhèi xiē jiù shì le |
| [15:15.23] |
In this briefcase I carry actual scientific facts. zài zhè gè shǒu tí xiāng zhōng wǒ dài lái le zhēn zhèng de kē xué zhèng jù |
| [15:19.20] |
A briefcase of facts, if you will. kě suàn shì zhěng gè tí xiāng dí zhèng jù |
| [15:24.07] |
Some of these fossils are over 200 million years old. qí zhōng yǒu xiē huà shí chāo guò 2 yì nián lǎo |
| [15:29.41] |
Before you even start, I' m not denying evolution. wǒ yào xiān gào sù nǐ wǒ bìng bù fǒu dìng jìn huà lùn |
| [15:32.84] |
It' s just one of the possibilities. jìn huà lùn zhǐ shì kě néng xìng zhī yī |
| [15:35.15] |
It' s the only possibility. jìn huà lùn shì wéi yī de kě néng |
| [15:37.35] |
Ross, could you just open your mind, like, this much? luó sī nǐ néng bù néng shāo shāo chǎng kāi xīn xiōng? |
| [15:42.52] |
Didn' t the brightest minds in the world believe the Earth was flat? yǐ qián zuì cōng míng de rén bù yě xiāng xìn dì qiú shì píng de? |
| [15:47.59] |
And up till 50 years ago, you thought the atom was the smallest thing... wǔ shí nián qián, kē xué jiā rèn wéi yuán zǐ shì zuì wēi xiǎo de shì wù |
| [15:52.43] |
... until you split it open and this whole mess of crap came out. hòu lái kē xué jiā jī suì le yuán zǐ yú shì chǎn shēng le gè zhǒng wán yì |
| [15:58.50] |
Are you telling me that you are so unbelievably arrogant... nán dào nǐ shì rú cǐ zì dà |
| [16:02.94] |
... that you can' t admit that there' s a teeny, tiny possibility... wú fǎ chéng rèn yǒu yì diǎn diǎn de kě néng |
| [16:07.00] |
... that you could be wrong about this? nǐ men kē xué jiā yě xǔ huì fàn cuò? |
| [16:15.75] |
There might be... shì yǒu yì diǎn diǎn |
| [16:19.00] |
... a teeny... yì diǎn diǎn |
| [16:22.23] |
... tiny... fēi cháng yì diǎn diǎn |
| [16:25.00] |
... possibility. de kě néng |
| [16:28.37] |
I can' t believe you caved. wǒ zhēn bù xiāng xìn nǐ qū fú le |
| [16:33.47] |
You just abandoned your whole belief system! nǐ fàng qì le nǐ de zhěng gè xìn yǎng! |
| [16:38.21] |
Before, I didn' t agree with you, but at least I respected you. yǐ qián wǒ suī rán bù tóng yì nǐ dàn wǒ zhì shǎo zūn jìng nǐ |
| [16:41.91] |
But.... dàn shì |
| [16:43.62] |
How are you gonna go into work tomorrow? míng tiān nǐ yào zěn me jì xù yán jiū? |
| [16:46.05] |
How are you going to face the other science guys? nǐ yào rú hé miàn duì qí tā kē xué jiā? |
| [16:49.00] |
How are you going to face yourself? nǐ yào rú hé miàn duì nǐ zì jǐ? |
| [17:08.41] |
That was fun. So who' s hungry? zhēn hǎo wán, yǒu shuí è le? |
| [17:10.68] |
I am. wǒ è le |
| [17:11.78] |
Me too. Let me just get my coat. wǒ yě shì wǒ qù ná wài tào |
| [17:22.15] |
What happened? zěn me le? |
| [17:25.36] |
It was an accident, I swear. zhè shì yì wài, wǒ fā shì |
| [17:27.03] |
I was putting on my jacket and the thing and the lamp and it broke. wǒ zhèng zài chuān wài tào tái dēng jiù pò le |
| [17:31.20] |
Oh, please, Monica! You' ve always hated my lamp! bài tuō, mó nī kǎ! nǐ tòng hèn wǒ de tái dēng! |
| [17:34.83] |
And now all of a sudden, it' s just magically, it' s just broken? tū rán jiān tā jiù qí jī shì dì pò le? |
| [17:39.30] |
Phoebe, tell her? fēi bǐ, gào sù tā |
| [17:40.77] |
I didn' t see it, because I was putting on my jacket. wǒ méi kàn dào yīn wèi wǒ zhèng zài chuān wài tào |
| [17:44.28] |
But I want to believe you. dàn wǒ xiǎng yào xiāng xìn nǐ |
| [17:50.05] |
Hey, Chandler. Monica just broke my seashell lamp. hāi, qián dé mó nī kǎ dǎ pò le wǒ de bèi ké tái dēng |
| [17:54.52] |
Neat. zhēn hǎo |
| [17:55.89] |
I' m gonna die alone! wǒ huì sǐ dé gū kǔ líng dīng! |
| [18:00.23] |
Okay, you win. hǎo, suàn nǐ yíng |
| [18:03.16] |
Chandler, you are not gonna die alone. qián dé, nǐ bú huì sǐ dé gū kǔ líng dīng |
| [18:06.06] |
Janice was my safety net, okay? běn lái zhēn nī sī shì wǒ de ān quán bǎo zhàng |
| [18:08.20] |
And now I have to get a snake. xiàn zài wǒ bì xū qù yǎng yī tiáo shé le |
| [18:12.20] |
Why is that? wèi shí me? |
| [18:13.24] |
If I' m gonna be an old, lonely man, I' m gonna need a thing. rú guǒ wǒ huì chéng wéi gū dú lǎo rén wǒ xū yào yǎng gè dōng xī |
| [18:16.88] |
You know, a hook. yǒu gè yī kào |
| [18:18.71] |
Like that guy on the subway who eats his own face. jiù xiàng dì tiě shàng nà gè chī zì jǐ liǎn de rén |
| [18:22.41] |
So I figure I' ll be " Crazy Man With A Snake." wǒ huì chéng wéi " yǎng shé de fēng lǎo tóu" |
| [18:24.72] |
Crazy Snake Man. yǎng shé fēng zi |
| [18:26.22] |
Then I' ll get more snakes, call them my babies. rán hòu wǒ huì yǎng gèng duō shé dàng chéng wǒ de zǐ nǚ |
| [18:28.49] |
Kids will run past my place! xiǎo hái dōu bù gǎn jīng guò wǒ de mén kǒu! |
| [18:30.89] |
" Run away from Crazy Snake Man," they' ll shout! tā men huì jiào dào: yǎng shé fēng zi yào lái zhuā rén le! |
| [18:37.56] |
You' ve got to get over this. nǐ bì xū xiǎng kāi yì diǎn |
| [18:40.53] |
You won' t end up alone. nǐ bú huì gū kǔ líng dīng |
| [18:42.17] |
Of course I will. wǒ dāng rán huì |
| [18:43.94] |
I reject anyone who' s crazy enough to actually go out with me... wǒ shuǎi diào le suǒ yǒu bèn dé yuàn yì gēn wǒ jiāo wǎng de nǚ hái |
| [18:47.91] |
... and then I bitch that there aren' t any great women out there. rán hòu wǒ bào yuàn zhǎo bu dào hǎo nǚ hái |
| [18:54.25] |
You have just described... wǒ men suǒ jiāo wǎng de nán rén |
| [18:55.75] |
... virtually every man that we' ve ever gone out with. jiù gēn nǐ suǒ miáo shù de yí yàng |
| [19:01.35] |
You are not a freak. You' re a guy. nǐ méi shén me wèn tí nǐ zhǐ shì gè píng cháng rén |
| [19:05.12] |
She' s right. tā shuō de duì |
| [19:06.59] |
You' re no different than the rest. nǐ yǔ qí tā rén méi shén me bù tóng |
| [19:08.56] |
Wait a minute, wait a minute. Yes, he is. děng yī xià, děng yī xià tā shì bù yí yàng |
| [19:10.93] |
You are totally different. nǐ qí shí hěn bù yí yàng |
| [19:13.00] |
In a bad way? hěn zāo gāo ma? |
| [19:14.23] |
No, honey, in a wonderful way. bù, tián xīn, shì hěn hǎo de bù yí yàng |
| [19:16.23] |
You know what you want now. xiàn zài nǐ zhī dào nǐ yào shén me le |
| [19:18.20] |
Most guys don' t even have a clue. dà duō shù nán rén gēn běn bù zhī dào |
| [19:20.00] |
You' re ready to take risks, be vulnerable and intimate with someone. nǐ zhǔn bèi hǎo jiē shòu fēng xiǎn le zhǔn bèi hǎo jiē shòu shāng hài, yú rén qīn jìn |
| [19:24.04] |
You' re not gonna end up alone. nǐ bú huì gū kǔ líng dīng de |
| [19:26.81] |
You called Janice. That' s how much you wanted to be with someone! nǐ dǎ diàn huà gěi zhēn nī sī zhè zhèng míng nǐ xī wàng yú rén sī shǒu zhōng shēng! |
| [19:33.72] |
You' ve made it! You' re there! nǐ yǐ jīng gǎi biàn le! nǐ bù yí yàng le! |
| [19:35.82] |
You are ready to make a commitment! nǐ zhǔn bèi hǎo zuò chū chéng nuò le! |
| [19:38.49] |
Don' t know about that! dàn shì zì jǐ què bù zhī dào! |
| [19:48.13] |
What you got there? nǐ ná le shén me? |
| [19:49.43] |
Something else that' s not yours that you can break? bú shì nǐ de dōng xī ér nǐ xiǎng yào dǎ pò? |
| [19:55.51] |
I know you like this and I want you to have it. wǒ zhī dào nǐ xǐ huān zhè gè wǒ yě yào nǐ shōu xià tā |
| [19:58.74] |
It' ll look good in our apartment. zài wǒ men gōng yù huì hěn hǎo kàn |
| [20:01.91] |
Thank you. xiè xiè |
| [20:09.82] |
That' s fine. méi guān xì |
| [20:13.93] |
You' ll all be pleased to know that I have a date tomorrow night. nǐ men huì hěn gāo xìng zhī dào míng tiān wǎn shàng wǒ yǒu yuē huì |
| [20:18.26] |
This woman Allison from work. She is great. wǒ de tóng shì ài lì sēn rén hěn bù cuò |
| [20:20.37] |
She' s pretty, she' s smart. And I' ve been... tā yòu piào liàng yòu cōng míng wǒ yī zhí |
| [20:23.77] |
... holding off asking her out in the past, because she has a... méi yǒu yuē tā chū lái yīn wèi tā yǒu yí gè |
| [20:28.14] |
... unusually large head. bù xún cháng de dà tóu! |
| [20:31.18] |
But I' m not going to let that stuff hang me up anymore. dàn wǒ bú yào ràng zhè zhǒng shì qíng zǔ zhǐ wǒ |
| [20:35.00] |
Look at me. I' m growing. kàn kàn wǒ, wǒ chéng shú le |
| [20:38.15] |
You can' t recycle yearbooks, can you? tóng xué lù yǒu méi yǒu huí shōu? |
| [20:41.65] |
I' ll take that. nà gè gěi wǒ |
| [20:43.05] |
You want his yearbook? nǐ yào tā de tóng xué lù? |
| [20:45.19] |
Some people said nice things about him. Somebody should have it. yǒu rén shuō le tā de hǎo huà yīng gāi liú xià lái |
| [20:49.03] |
Gosh, this is so weird. zhè zhēn de hěn qí guài |
| [20:51.80] |
His whole life was in this apartment and now it' s gone. tā zhěng gè shēng mìng dōu zài zhè gōng yù dù guò xiàn zài rén qù lóu kōng |
| [20:56.30] |
I think it would be nice if we just took a few moments for Mr. Heckles. wǒ xiǎng wǒ men yīng gāi wèi hā kè xiān shēng mò āi yī huì ér |
| [21:01.74] |
He was kind of a pain. He was, but he was a person. tā shì gè má fán rén wù dàn tā shì gè rén wù |
| [21:12.42] |
You' re all going to hell. nǐ men quán dōu huì xià dì yù |
| [21:14.32] |
It' s really not that big! qí shí méi yǒu nà me dà! |
| [21:19.66] |
Taking that with you, huh? Oh, yeah. nǐ yào ná nà gè zǒu ba? méi cuò |
| [21:28.87] |
You coming? nǐ lái ma? |
| [21:30.34] |
In a second. děng yī xià |
| [21:47.62] |
Goodbye, Mr. Heckles. zài jiàn, hā kè xiān shēng |
| [21:52.92] |
We' ll try to keep it down. wǒ men huì ān jìng diǎn |
| [22:05.27] |
My major was useless. wǒ wán quán xué fēi suǒ yòng |
| [22:07.07] |
How often do you look in the classifieds and see " Philosopher Wanted"? bào zhǐ shàng shén me shí hòu kàn de dào " zhēng qiú zhé xué jiā"? |
| [22:11.38] |
Sure. duì a |
| [22:13.08] |
My God, that' s a big head! tiān a, nà zhēn shì gè dà tóu! |
| [22:17.22] |
It didn' t look this big in the office. Maybe it' s the lighting. zài bàn gōng shì kàn qǐ lái méi zhè me dà yě xǔ shì yīn wèi dēng guāng |
| [22:21.25] |
My head must look like a golf ball at work. wǒ de tóu zài gōng sī yí dìng xiàng gè gāo ěr fū qiú nà me xiǎo |
| [22:25.59] |
Don' t get hung up on it. Quick! List five things you like about her. bú yào xiǎng le kuài liè chū nǐ xǐ huān tā de wǔ jiàn shì |
| [22:29.63] |
Nice smile, good dresser. xiào róng hěn měi, yī zhuó gāo yǎ |
| [22:31.76] |
Big head, big head, big head! dà tóu, dà tóu, hái shì dà tóu! |