|
Joe, that' s why your parents told you not to jump on the bed! |
|
qiáo yī, zhè jiù shì nǐ bà mā jiào nǐ bú yào tiào shàng chuáng de yuán yīn |
|
The One With the Jam |
|
běn jí bō chū:" guǒ jiàng yǔ nán rén" |
|
Hey, look at me! I' m making jam! |
|
kàn kàn wǒ, wǒ zài zuò guǒ jiàng |
|
I' ve been at it since 4 a. m. Where' d you get fruit at 4 a. m.? |
|
wǒ zǎo shàng sì diǎn jiù qǐ lái le nà me zǎo nǐ zěn me mǎi dé dào shuǐ guǒ? |
|
Down at the docks. You know, you can get it wholesale. |
|
zài mǎ tóu nà ér mǎi de nǐ yí dìng bù zhī dào kě yǐ mǎi dào pī fā jià |
|
I didn' t know there were docks. |
|
wǒ gēn běn bù zhī dào yǒu mǎ tóu |
|
Is it broken? |
|
shǒu bì duàn le ma? |
|
No, but I gotta wear this for a couple weeks. |
|
bù, dàn wǒ dé dài zhe zhè wán yì ér hǎo jǐ gè lǐ bài |
|
You tell the doctor you did it jumping on your bed? |
|
nǐ yǒu méi yǒu gào sù yī shēng nǐ shì yīn wèi tiào shàng chuáng cái shòu shāng? |
|
No. I had a whole story worked out, but then... |
|
bù, wǒ biān de gù shì běn lái yǒu yòng de dàn shì |
|
Chandler sold me out. |
|
qián dé chū mài le wǒ |
|
I didn' t think the doctor would buy that it " fell out of the socket." |
|
bào qiàn, wǒ xiǎng yī shēng bú huì xiāng xìn nǐ shuō de" shǒu bì jiù zì jǐ tuō luò le" |
|
What is this? Fruit? |
|
zhè shì shén me? shuǐ guǒ ma? |
|
|
|
Monica' s making jam. |
|
mó nī kǎ zài zuò guǒ jiàng |
|
Jam? I love jam! How come we never have jam at our place? |
|
wǒ zuì ài guǒ jiàng le! wǒ men jiā zěn me cóng lái méi yǒu guǒ jiàng? |
|
Because the kids need new shoes. |
|
yīn wèi hái zi men xū yào mǎi xīn xié |
|
I' m going into business. I' m sick of being depressed about Richard. |
|
wǒ dé zuò zhèng shì le wǒ bù xiǎng zài wèi lǐ chá de shì shāng shén |
|
I needed a plan. A plan to get over my man. |
|
wǒ xū yào yí gè jì huà lái wàng jì wǒ de nán rén |
|
What' s the opposite of man? Jam! |
|
shén me shì gēn nán rén xiāng fǎn? jiù shì guǒ jiàng! |
|
Joey, don' t! It' s way too hot! |
|
qiáo yī, bú yào! nà gè tài tàng le! |
|
This' ll just be my batch. |
|
nà me zhè yī fèn jiù suàn wǒ de |
|
That' s it. |
|
dào cǐ wéi zhǐ |
|
Hey, you, J. Crew guy.... |
|
wèi, nà gè chuān jié kè lǔ pái de jiā huǒ |
|
Why are you following me? |
|
nǐ wèi hé gēn zōng wǒ? |
|
All week, everywhere I look, there' s you. |
|
zhè yī zhōu lái, wǒ wǎng nǎ ér kàn jiù huì kàn dào nǐ |
|
You wouldn' t return my calls. You sent back my letters. |
|
nǐ yě bù huí wǒ diàn huà yòu bǎ wǒ de xìn tuì huí lái |
|
One more chance, Ursula. Please. |
|
zài gěi wǒ yī cì jī huì bài tuō, wū sū lā |
|
This is awkward. |
|
zhēn shì tài gān gà le |
|
Yeah, because you want Ursula, and I' m Phoebe. Twin sisters. |
|
yīn wèi nǐ yào zhǎo de shì wū sū lā wǒ shì fēi bǐ, wǒ men shì shuāng bāo tāi |
|
Seriously. |
|
zhè shì zhēn de |
|
That' s great. I' m stalking the wrong woman. |
|
tài hǎo le, wǒ gēn cuò rén le |
|
I am such a dingus! |
|
wǒ zhēn shì gè hú tú dàn! |
|
Oh, you' re not a dingus. |
|
nǐ bú shì hú tú dàn |
|
I just want you to know I wasn' t always like this. |
|
wǒ zhǐ xiǎng ràng nǐ zhī dào wǒ bú shì zǒng shì zhè yàng de |
|
Before I met your sister, I was a normal guy who sold cellular phones. |
|
zài rèn shi nǐ mèi mei zhī qián wǒ zhǐ shì mài xíng dòng diàn huà de pǔ tōng rén |
|
Look, it' s not your fault. |
|
tīng zhe, zhè bú shì nǐ de cuò |
|
I mean, this is just what she does to guys, okay? |
|
zhè jiù shì tā duì dài nán rén de fāng shì |
|
Well, thanks. |
|
xiè xiè nǐ |
|
Wait. I got a little story. |
|
děng děng, wǒ yǒu gè xiǎo gù shì gào sù nǐ |
|
Once, in junior high school, I thought I was a witch. |
|
wǒ zài niàn guó zhōng shí wǒ yǐ wéi zì jǐ shì nǚ wū |
|
And a guidance counselor told me something that might help you. |
|
yǒu gè fǔ dǎo lǎo shī gēn wǒ shuō de huà wǒ xiǎng kě yǐ bāng zhù nǐ |
|
He said," Okay, you' re not a witch. You' re just an average student." |
|
tā shuō" nǐ gēn běn bú shì nǚ wū nǐ zhǐ shì gè pǔ tōng xué shēng" |
|
See what I' m saying? Not really. |
|
nǐ dǒng wǒ de yì sī ma? bù tài dǒng |
|
Well, get over it. |
|
wàng le tā ba |
|
You seem like a really nice guy. |
|
nǐ kàn qǐ lái shì gè hǎo rén |
|
Don' t be so hard on yourself, okay? |
|
bié duì zì jǐ tài kē kè, hǎo ma? |
|
You' re right. I know you' re right. And thanks for being so nice. |
|
méi cuò, wǒ xiǎng nǐ shì duì de xiè xiè nǐ duì wǒ zhè me yǒu shàn |
|
Thanks a lot. |
|
xiè xiè nǐ |
|
Want to get some coffee? |
|
nǐ yào bú yào qù hē kā fēi? |
|
You don' t have to walk behind me anymore. |
|
nǐ bù yòng zǒu zài wǒ hòu miàn le |
|
" Gone for more jars. Be back later. Monica Geller." |
|
" qù mǎi guàn zi, děng huì ér huí lái mó nī kǎ gài lēi" |
|
Wait a minute. Look! |
|
děng děng, nǐ kàn! |
|
We' re all alone in an empty apartment. |
|
zhè jiān kōng fáng zi lǐ, zhǐ yǒu wǒ men liǎng gè |
|
I have to be at work in 10 minutes. |
|
wǒ zài shí fēn zhōng nèi dé qù shàng bān |
|
All right. It' s not like I' m employee of the year or anything. |
|
hǎo ba, wǒ yòu bú shì mó fàn yuán gōng |
|
There it is! |
|
zài zhè lǐ a! |
|
Oh, that' s what you mean. |
|
zhè jiù shì nǐ yào zhǎo de a |
|
Do I look fat? |
|
wǒ kàn qǐ lái hěn pàng ma? |
|
No. |
|
bú huì a |
|
I accept that. |
|
zhè diǎn wǒ kě yǐ jiē shòu |
|
When Janice asked me and I said no, she thought I was calling her a cow. |
|
dāng zhēn nī sī wèn wǒ shí, wǒ huí dá bù tā què rèn wéi wǒ shuō tā xiàng mǔ niú |
|
Walk us through it, honey. Walk us through it. |
|
chóng tóu zài shuō yī cì gěi wǒ men tīng |
|
Janice said," Hi. Do I look fat today?" And I looked at her |
|
zhēn nī sī shuō, tā jīn tiān kàn qǐ lái pàng ma wǒ kàn kàn tā |
|
You looked at her? |
|
nǐ kàn kàn tā? |
|
You never look. |
|
nǐ jué bù néng kàn |
|
You just answer. It' s like a reflex. " Do I look fat?" " No." |
|
nǐ zhǐ néng huí dá, jiù xiàng fǎn shè dòng zuò " wǒ kàn qǐ lái pàng ma?"," bù" |
|
" Is she prettier than I am?" " No." |
|
" tā bǐ wǒ piào liàng ma?"," bù" |
|
" Does size matter?" |
|
" chǐ cùn zhòng yào ma?"," bù" |
|
And it works both ways. |
|
zhè diǎn nán nǚ dōu shì yòng |
|
So you both just know this stuff? |
|
suǒ yǐ nǐ men běn lái jiù zhī dào zhèi xiē? |
|
After 30 or 40 fights, you kind of catch on. |
|
chǎo le dà gài sān sì shí cì hòu nǐ dà gài jiù jì zhù le |
|
Okay. For instance: |
|
hǎo, bǐ rú shuō |
| [06:08.250] |
Janice is coming back from a trip. She gives you two options. zhēn nī sī lǚ xíng huí lái tā gěi nǐ liǎng zhǒng xuǎn zé |
| [06:12.650] |
Option one: She' ll take a cab home from the airport. xuǎn zé yī, tā cóng jī chǎng zì jǐ dā jì chéng chē huí lái |
| [06:16.150] |
Option two: You can meet her at baggage claim. What do you do? xuǎn zé èr, nǐ zài lǐng xíng lǐ de dì fāng yǔ tā pèng miàn, nǐ huì zěn me zuò? |
| [06:19.920] |
Easy. Baggage claim. jiǎn dān, lǐng xíng lǐ de dì fāng |
| [06:21.230] |
Wrong! Now you' re single. cuò le, suǒ yǐ nǐ méi nǚ péng yǒu la |
| [06:25.600] |
It' s actually secret option number three. qí shí shì dì sān ge mì mì jué zhāo |
| [06:29.000] |
You meet her at the gate. That way she knows you love her. nǐ zài dēng jī mén yǔ tā pèng miàn zhè jiù biǎo xiàn chū nǐ duì tā de ài |
| [06:33.400] |
Okay, this is good. hǎo, zhè yàng zhēn bù cuò |
| [06:38.780] |
... at night, which I' m all for. wǒ dāng rán yě xǐ huān bào bào |
| [06:41.580] |
But when you want to go to sleep, you want some space. bù guò dāng nǐ xiǎng shuì jiào shí nǐ huì xiǎng yào yì diǎn kōng jiān |
| [06:45.620] |
So how do I tell her that without... wǒ yào zěn yàng gào sù tā, cái bú huì |
| [06:48.320] |
... you know, accidentally calling her fat or something? bù xiǎo xīn yòu shuō tā pàng zhī lèi de? |
| [06:57.760] |
I' m late for work. wǒ shàng bān yào chí dào le |
| [06:59.600] |
Are you guys coming down? Yeah. I' m right behind you. nǐ men yào bú yào xià lái? hǎo, děng yī xià jiù qù |
| [07:03.330] |
Good luck, Chandler. zhù nǐ hǎo yùn, qián dé |
| [07:09.040] |
The sleeping thing. guān yú shuì jiào nà jiàn shì |
| [07:12.280] |
Very tricky business, but solvable. fēi cháng kùn nán, dàn kě yǐ jiě jué |
| [07:15.050] |
I thought you were " cuddly sleepers." wǒ yǐ wéi nǐ men dōu shì" bào zhe shuì jiào" |
| [07:20.120] |
No, not cuddly. Not me. Just her. bù, bú shì bào zhe shuì bú shì wǒ, zhǐ yǒu tā |
| [07:23.020] |
I' m like you. I need the room. wǒ gēn nǐ yí yàng, wǒ xū yào kōng jiān |
| [07:25.360] |
Okay, come here. hǎo, dào zhè ér lái |
| [07:30.630] |
Okay. You' re in bed. hǎo, xiàn zài nǐ zài chuáng shàng |
| [07:37.570] |
I' ll use the cushion. wǒ hái shì yòng diàn zǐ hǎo le |
| [07:41.340] |
Okay. You' re in bed. She' s over on your side, cuddling. hǎo, nǐ zài chuáng shàng tā zài nǐ páng biān, bào zhe nǐ |
| [07:45.510] |
Now, you wait for her to drift off... xiàn zài, nǐ děng tā zhú jiàn shuì zháo |
| [07:49.010] |
... and then you hug her... rán hòu nǐ bào zhù tā |
| [07:51.650] |
... and roll her over to her side of the bed. rán hòu bǎ tā gǔn dào chuáng de lìng yī biān |
| [07:56.590] |
And then you... rán hòu nǐ |
| [07:59.590] |
... roll away. nǐ jiù gǔn dào páng biān qù |
| [08:03.430] |
Hug for her. bào zhù tā |
| [08:08.370] |
Roll for you. zì jǐ gǔn dào páng biān qù |
| [08:12.100] |
The old " hug and roll." jiù xiàng yǐ qián de" yōng bào yǔ fān gǔn" |
| [08:14.270] |
One question. You' re pretending the pillow' s a girl, right? zhǐ yǒu yí gè wèn tí nǐ bǎ zhěn tou dàng zuò nǚ shēng, duì ba? |
| [08:21.910] |
Remember when you were a kid, your mom would send you to the movies... jì de xiǎo shí hòu nǐ mā huì bǎ nǐ sòng dào diàn yǐng yuàn |
| [08:25.880] |
... with a jar of jam and a little spoon? gěi nǐ yī guàn guǒ jiàng hé yī gēn xiǎo tāng chí? |
| [08:31.860] |
You' re so pretty. nǐ zhēn kě ài |
| [08:40.600] |
You know that guy who' s been following me? I talked to him today. nǐ zhī dào nà gè gēn zōng wǒ de rén ma? wǒ jīn tiān gēn tā shuō huà le |
| [08:44.770] |
You talked to him? Are you crazy? nǐ gēn tā shuō huà? nǐ fēng le ma? |
| [08:49.440] |
First, I' m not crazy. And second, say it, don' t spray it. dì yī, wǒ méi yǒu fēng dì èr, yòng shuō de, bié yòng pēn de |
| [08:54.550] |
Anyway, his name is Malcolm, and he wasn' t following me. fǎn zhèng tā jiào zuò mài ěr kāng tā yě bú shì zài gēn zōng wǒ |
| [08:58.150] |
I mean, he was, but he thought I was Ursula. wǒ shì shuō, tā zài gēn zōng méi cuò dàn tā yǐ wéi wǒ shì wū sū lā |
| [09:03.590] |
That' s why he couldn' t just come up and talk to me. suǒ yǐ tā bù gǎn shàng qián lái gēn wǒ shuō huà |
| [09:07.890] |
Because of the restraining order. yīn wèi yǒu jìn zhì lìng |
| [09:12.830] |
Not feeling better about Malcolm. wǒ hái shì duì mài ěr kāng méi yǒu hǎo gǎn |
| [09:16.600] |
No, no, he' s not a kook. bù, tā bú shì fēng zi |
| [09:18.900] |
He' s just this very passionate, incredibly romantic guy... tā zhǐ shì gè fēi cháng rè qíng jí dù làng màn de jiā huǒ |
| [09:23.170] |
... that just got a teensy bit carried away. zhǐ shì yǒu diǎn guò huǒ le |
| [09:26.310] |
We get along really well, and he' s so cute. wǒ men chù de hěn hǎo, ér qiě tā hěn kě ài |
| [09:30.010] |
Oh, my God! You' ve got a crush on your sister' s stalker. tiān a, nǐ jìng rán àn liàn gēn zōng nǐ mèi mei de rén |
| [09:35.420] |
I' m going to help him get " deUrsulaized." wǒ yào bāng tā wàng jì wū sū lā de yī qiè |
| [09:38.520] |
Like I did for Joey after he went out with her. jiù xiàng qiáo yī gēn tā yuē huì hòu wǒ wèi tā zuò de yí yàng |
| [09:41.860] |
I didn' t stalk her. wǒ méi yǒu gēn zōng tā |
| [09:44.200] |
I asked for the news, not the weather. wǒ shì wèn nǐ shì qíng nǐ bù yòng pēn kǒu shuǐ |
| [09:51.170] |
Joey, this is for you. It' s blackberry currant. qiáo yī, zhè shì nǐ de zhè shì hēi méi hóng cù sù jiàng |
| [10:01.350] |
Joe, I got to ask. qiáo yī, wǒ dé wèn nǐ |
| [10:03.180] |
The girl from the xerox place, buck naked... yǐng yìn diàn de nà gè nǚ hái, quán luǒ |
| [10:07.050] |
... or a big tub of jam? hái shì nǐ yào yī dà gāng guǒ jiàng? |
| [10:11.220] |
Put your hands together. nǐ bǎ liǎng zhī shǒu fàng zài yì qǐ ba |
| [10:20.230] |
No more jam? méi yǒu guǒ jiàng le? |
| [10:22.800] |
What happened to your jam plan? nǐ de guǒ jiàng jì huà ne? |
| [10:25.070] |
I figured out I' d need to charge 17 a jar just to break even. wǒ suàn guò le wǒ měi guàn dé mài 17 yuán cái néng dǎ píng |
| [10:28.840] |
So I' ve got a new plan now. Babies. suǒ yǐ wǒ yǒu gè xīn jì huà jiù shì shēng xiǎo hái |
| [10:33.340] |
Well, you' ll need much bigger jars. nà nǐ kě néng xū yào hěn dà de guàn zi |
| [10:38.220] |
What are you talking about? About me having a baby. nǐ men zài tán shén me? tán wǒ yào shēng hái zi de shì |
| [10:41.720] |
Are you serious? Yeah. nǐ shì rèn zhēn de ma? shì a |
| [10:44.220] |
The jam plan helped me take control of my life. guǒ jiàng jì huà ràng wǒ kāi shǐ zhǎng wò zì jǐ de shēng huó |
| [10:47.660] |
So I thought," What is the most important thing to me?" suǒ yǐ wǒ jiù xiǎng shén me shì duì wǒ zuì zhòng yào? |
| [10:50.830] |
And that' s when I came up with the baby plan. yīn cǐ wǒ jiù xiǎng chū shēng xiǎo hái zhè gè jì huà |
| [10:54.000] |
Aren' t you forgetting something? nǐ shì bú shì wàng le shén me? |
| [10:57.000] |
What is that guy' s name? Dad! nà gè jiā huǒ jiào shén me? jiào" bà bà"! |
| [11:01.670] |
It took me 28 years to find a man I wanted to spend my life with. wǒ huā le 28 nián, zhǎo dào yí gè xiǎng yǔ tā gòng dù zhōng shēn de nán rén |
| [11:05.410] |
If I have to wait another 28 years, I' ll be 56 before I can have a baby. rú guǒ wǒ hái dé zài děng 28 nián wǒ jiù dé 56 suì cái shēng xiǎo hái |
| [11:09.710] |
And that' s just stupid. nà yàng shí zài tài yú chǔn le |
| [11:13.020] |
That' s what' s stupid? nà yàng jiào yú chǔn? |
| [11:17.020] |
I don' t need an actual man. Just a few of his best swimmers. wǒ bù xū yào yí gè zhēn zhèng de nán rén zhǐ yào tā jǐ zhǐ huì yóu yǒng de xiǎo jiā huǒ |
| [11:22.760] |
And there are places you can go to get that... stuff. ér qiě nǐ kě yǐ zài mǒu gè dì fāng dé dào nèi xiē xiǎo jiā huǒ |
| [11:26.230] |
Down to the docks again? yòu yào qù mǎ tóu le ma? |
| [11:38.440] |
Nightnight, Bingaling. wǎn ān, bīn bǎo bèi |
| [11:42.710] |
Nightnight... wǎn ān |
| [11:45.120] |
... Janice. zhēn nī sī |
| [11:50.450] |
Look at all the room on her side! kàn kàn tā nà yī biān de wèi zhì! |
| [11:53.220] |
A giant penguin could fit over there. dōu kě yǐ fàng yì zhī dà qǐ é le |
| [11:57.500] |
That' d be weird, though. bù guò nà yàng huì hěn qí guài |
| [12:00.670] |
Hug and roll time. yào kāi shǐ" yōng bào yǔ fān gǔn" le |
| [12:02.270] |
I' m hugging. I' m hugging. wǒ zhèng zài yōng bào |
| [12:04.840] |
You' re rolling, and.... nǐ zài fān gǔn, rán hòu |
| [12:07.840] |
Yes! Freedom! tài hǎo le, zì yóu le! |
| [12:10.140] |
Except for this arm! chú le zhè zhī shǒu bì yǐ wài! |
| [12:12.740] |
I' m stuck. Stuck arm. wǒ bèi kùn zhù le, shǒu bì kǎ zhù le |
| [12:16.650] |
Time for the old tablecloth trick. One fluid motion. gāi wán yǐ qián nà zhǒng gài zhuō bù de yóu xì le, yí gè kuài dòng zuò |
| [12:20.180] |
Quick like a cat. xiàng māo yí yàng jiǎo jié |
| [12:22.120] |
And one, two... yī èr |
| [12:25.320] |
... three! sān! |
| [12:36.030] |
Oh, great. You' re doing great. hěn hǎo, nǐ zuò de hěn hǎo |
| [12:38.800] |
Going strong. IKeep going. hěn bù cuò, jì xù ba |
| [12:42.140] |
These are my nightvision goggles. zhè shì wǒ de yè shì jìng |
| [12:45.210] |
This is the book I pretend to read when I' m watching her in the park. zhè shì wǒ zài gōng yuán lǐ kàn tā shí jiǎ zhuāng yuè dú de shū |
| [12:49.810] |
And these are Madlibs. They' re just for fun. zhèi xiē shì jiē zì yóu xì zhǐ shì hǎo wán yòng de |
| [12:55.720] |
This is the log I kept, recording her every movement. zhè shì wǒ xiě de rì zhì jì lù tā de yī jǔ yī dòng |
| [13:00.420] |
Want to hear some of it? nǐ yào bú yào tīng tīng kàn? |
| [13:02.290] |
Not even a little bit. wǒ yì diǎn yě bù xiǎng tīng |
| [13:05.500] |
It' s about you. shì gēn nǐ yǒu guān de |
| [13:06.800] |
Okay then. nà hǎo ba |
| [13:13.640] |
" l met Phoebe today. wǒ jīn tiān yù dào fēi bǐ |
| [13:20.340] |
And when I was walking home, I thought about her a lot. dāng wǒ zǒu huí jiā shí, wǒ bù duàn xiǎng zhe tā |
| [13:23.580] |
It was weird, but kind of cool." suī rán hěn guài, què shì hěn bàng de gǎn jué |
| [13:27.750] |
Good. hěn hǎo |
| [13:30.290] |
So what were you thinking? nǐ zài xiǎng shén me? |
| [13:33.360] |
I was thinking what it' d be like to kiss you. wǒ zài xiǎng qīn nǐ shì shén me gǎn jué? |
| [13:36.160] |
Really? No. zhēn de ma? bù |
| [13:40.830] |
That' s just something I said now so that maybe I could kiss you. nà zhǐ shì wǒ gù yì shuō de zhè yàng wǒ cái néng qīn nǐ |
| [13:44.940] |
Oh, okay. hǎo a |
| [13:52.680] |
No, it' s all right. I just had a jar of mustard. bù, bù yòng le wǒ gāng chī le yī guàn jiè mò |
| [14:03.190] |
Okay, he' s 6' 2", 170 pounds. hǎo, tā shì 6 chǐ 2 cùn, 170 bàng |
| [14:05.190] |
He describes himself as a male Gina Davis. tā xíng róng zì jǐ shì nán xìng de jí nà dài wéi sī |
| [14:08.460] |
You mean there' s more than one of us? nǐ shì shuō chú le wǒ men zhī wài hái yǒu bié rén? |
| [14:12.260] |
You can' t do this, Mon. If you do this, I' ll nǐ bù néng zhè yàng zuò, mó nī kǎ rú guǒ nǐ zhè me zuò, wǒ huì |
| [14:15.800] |
You' ll what? I' ll tell Mom. nǐ huì zěn yàng? wǒ huì gào sù mā |
| [14:19.440] |
I' m sorry, but he' s right. I love you, but you' re crazy. hěn bào qiàn, tā shì duì de wǒ ài nǐ, kě shì nǐ zhēn de fēng le |
| [14:23.470] |
Why? Why is this crazy? wèi shí me zhè yàng jiù jiào fēng le? |
| [14:26.480] |
So this isn' t the ideal way Oh, it' s not jiù suàn zhè bú shì lǐ xiǎng fāng fǎ zhè gēn běn bú shì |
| [14:29.280] |
Lips moving. Still talking. zuǐ bā zài dòng, wǒ hái zài jiǎng huà! |
| [14:32.280] |
It may not be ideal, but... zhè yàng kě néng bù tài lǐ xiǎng, dàn |
| [14:34.620] |
... I' m so ready. wǒ zhēn de zhǔn bèi hǎo le |
| [14:39.720] |
It makes me ache, you know? ràng wǒ xīn hǎo tòng, nǐ zhī dào ma? |
| [14:42.590] |
Check it out! Jam crackers! nǐ kàn kàn, guǒ jiàng bǐng gān! |
| [14:48.830] |
Okay. All right, how' s this? hǎo ba, zhè gè rú hé? |
| [14:51.300] |
Twentyseven, ltalianAmerican guy. 27 suì, yì dà lì yì měi guó rén |
| [14:54.310] |
He' s an actor. tā shì gè yǎn yuán |
| [14:56.170] |
Born in Queens. zài huáng hòu qū chū shēng |
| [14:58.110] |
Wow! Big family. Seven sisters... hǎo dà de jiā tíng! yǒu qī ge jiě jie |
| [15:02.250] |
... and he' s the only... boy. tā shì wéi yī de nán hái |
| [15:08.690] |
Oh, my God! Under personal comments: " New York Knicks rule." tiān a, gè rén píng lùn xiě zhe niǔ yuē ní kè duì wàn suì! |
| [15:12.490] |
Yeah, the Knicks rule! duì a, niǔ yuē ní kè duì wàn suì! |
| [15:18.030] |
Joey, this is you! qiáo yī, zhè gè shì nǐ! |
| [15:20.600] |
Let me see. ràng wǒ kàn kàn |
| [15:24.300] |
Oh, right! duì a |
| [15:26.800] |
You went to a sperm bank? nǐ qù jīng zǐ yín háng? |
| [15:28.710] |
Right after I did that sex study at NYU. jiù zài wǒ cān jiā niǔ yuē dà xué de xìng yán jiū zhī hòu |
| [15:31.710] |
Remember that sweater I gave you? nǐ jì bù jì de nǐ shēng rì shí wǒ sòng nǐ de máo yī? |
| [15:34.510] |
That' s how you bought it? nà shi nǐ yòng zhè yàng zhuàn lái de? |
| [15:37.720] |
No. That' s what I was wearing when I donated. bù, nà shi wǒ juān jīng zǐ nà tiān chuān de |
| [15:44.020] |
I' m surprised there' s any of my boys left. wǒ zhēn jīng yà tā men nà ér hái huì yǒu wǒ de xiǎo jiā huǒ |
| [15:47.790] |
It is pretty competitive. There' s an actual rocket scientist here. nà lǐ jìng zhēng hěn jī liè de hái yǒu zhēn zhèng de huǒ jiàn kē xué jiā ne |
| [15:52.000] |
Maybe I should have them put my Days of our Lives gig on here. huò xǔ wǒ gāi jiào tā men bǎ wǒ yǎn de lián xù jù fàng shǎng qù |
| [15:56.500] |
Juice this up a little. duō zēng jiā diǎn shēng shì |
| [16:01.540] |
How' s the maniac? nà gè fēng zi rú hé le? |
| [16:03.710] |
He' s yummy. We did a little kissing. tā zhēn mí rén, wǒ men jiē wěn le |
| [16:07.650] |
Phoebe, what are you doing? fēi bǐ, nǐ zài zuò shí mǒ? |
| [16:09.750] |
No, no. He' s not into that anymore. He quit for me. bù, tā bú huì zài fàn le tā wèi le wǒ jiè diào le |
| [16:15.190] |
This guy has been obsessed with your sister for God knows how long. nà jiā huǒ mí liàn nǐ mèi mei tiān xiǎo de dào dǐ yǒu duō jiǔ le |
| [16:19.820] |
You don' t just give that up. nǐ bù néng jiù zhè yàng suàn le |
| [16:22.930] |
He gave me his nightvision goggles and everything. tā bǎ tā de yè shì jìng hé yī qiè dōng xī dōu jiāo gěi wǒ le |
| [16:27.060] |
You' re taking the word of a guy who has nightvision goggles? yí gè yǒu yè shì jìng de rén tā shuō de huà nǐ yě gǎn xìn? |
| [16:31.340] |
He' s not still following her. You think he' s still following her? tā bù zài gēn zōng tā le nǐ jué de tā hái zài gēn zōng tā ma? |
| [16:35.340] |
Wake up and smell the restraining order. kuài xǐng xǐng, gǎn jué yī xià shén me jiào jìn zhì lìng ba |
| [16:40.340] |
What should I do? nǐ shuō wǒ gāi zěn me bàn? |
| [16:41.910] |
If you really like this guy, you should just trust him. ruò nǐ zhēn de hěn xǐ huān tā yīng gāi xiāng xìn tā cái shì |
| [16:45.120] |
Thank you, Monica. xiè xiè nǐ, mó nī kǎ |
| [16:47.250] |
Or you could follow him. huò zhě nǐ gāi gēn zōng tā, kàn tā qù nǎ lǐ |
| [16:49.350] |
That' s what I' d do. Forget mine. wǒ yě huì zhè me zuò wàng le wǒ gāng shuō de ba |
| [16:55.190] |
What happened? tiān a, fā shēng shén me shì? |
| [16:56.690] |
Crazy Chandler spun me... qián dé fā shén jīng, bǎ wǒ zhuǎn yī quān |
| [16:59.260] |
... off the bed. rán hòu tuī xià chuáng |
| [17:01.170] |
Wow! Spinning! Sounds like fun. zhuàn quān quān a, tīng qǐ lái hěn hǎo wán |
| [17:06.100] |
I wish. wǒ dào xī wàng |
| [17:07.710] |
He was just trying Ross' " hug and roll" thing. tā zhǐ shì zài shì luó sī de nà tào" yōng bào yǔ fān gǔn" |
| [17:16.510] |
Where he hugs you and then he rolls you away, and.... dāng tā bào zhù nǐ bǎ nǐ gǔn dào páng biān, zài |
| [17:23.520] |
Oh... my... God! wǒ de tiān a! |
| [18:04.190] |
What are you doing? nǐ zài zuò shí mǒ? |
| [18:05.660] |
Oh, I was just here looking for my... my.... wǒ zhǐ shì zài zhǎo wǒ de |
| [18:09.070] |
Part of an old sandwich. Here it is! chī guò de jiù sān míng zhì zài zhè lǐ! |
| [18:14.000] |
Were you following me? nǐ zài gēn zōng wǒ ma? |
| [18:16.370] |
Perhaps. kě néng ba |
| [18:19.340] |
Yes. I' m sorry. shì de, wǒ hěn bào qiàn |
| [18:21.510] |
I was afraid you were still hung up on my sister. wǒ pà nǐ réng rán mí liàn wǒ mèi mei |
| [18:24.780] |
So you spied on me. suǒ yǐ nǐ zài jiān shì wǒ |
| [18:27.620] |
I can' t believe you don' t trust me. wǒ zhēn bù gǎn xiāng xìn nǐ bù xìn rèn wǒ |
| [18:35.590] |
Well, what do you know? There goes my identical twin sister! nǐ zěn me huì zhī dào ne? wǒ de shuāng bāo tāi mèi mei zhèng hǎo jīng guò! |
| [18:40.200] |
Just walking along, looking like me. yī zhí zǒu zhe gēn wǒ zhǎng de yī mú yī yàng |
| [18:44.230] |
Is this a freakish coincidence, or did you know she takes this train? zhè shì gè qí yì de qiǎo hé hái shì nǐ zǎo zhī dao tā huì dā zhè bān chē? |
| [18:48.710] |
I' m sorry. I' m sorry. duì bù qǐ |
| [18:51.080] |
I tried to stop, but I couldn' t. wǒ shì zhe tíng zhǐ, dàn kòng zhì bù liǎo |
| [18:54.140] |
I' m so pathetic. wǒ zhēn kě bēi |
| [18:56.050] |
No, it' s not your fault. It' s partly my fault. bù, bú shì nǐ de cuò, wǒ yě yǒu cuò |
| [19:00.320] |
I made you quit cold turkey. shì wǒ yào nǐ duàn rán jiè chú zhè gè máo bìng |
| [19:04.420] |
Well, I can' t date you anymore because you' re, you know.... wǒ bù néng zài gēn nǐ yuē huì le yīn wèi nǐ shì, nǐ zhī dào de |
| [19:08.290] |
Wow! wa! |
| [19:11.600] |
But I will definitely help you get over my sister. Okay? dàn wǒ yí dìng huì bāng nǐ wàng le wǒ mèi mei, hǎo ma? |
| [19:16.600] |
Stalk me for a while, huh? shì zhe gēn zōng wǒ yī zhèn zi, hǎo ma? |
| [19:21.000] |
I' ll be like an Ursula patch. wǒ jiù zàn shí bāng nǐ jiè chú duì wū sū lā de mí liàn |
| [19:24.480] |
I don' t know. wǒ bù zhī dào |
| [19:25.840] |
Just.... Look, I' m going! nǐ jiù nǐ kàn, wǒ zhèng zài zǒu lù! |
| [19:28.910] |
Come on. lái ba |
| [19:31.180] |
I' m on the pillar. Which way will I go? wǒ yù dào zhù zi le wǒ huì wǎng nǎ bian zǒu? |
| [19:37.820] |
Where you going? To the bank. nǐ yào qù nǎ lǐ? wǒ yào qù yín háng |
| [19:40.420] |
Sperm or regular? jīng zǐ yín háng hái shì yì bān de |
| [19:43.590] |
Sperm. jīng zǐ yín háng |
| [19:45.330] |
You' re really doing it? nǐ què dìng yào zuò zhè jiàn shì? |
| [19:46.930] |
Oh, yeah. I picked a guy. 37135. shì a, wǒ tiāo le yí gè nán de biān hào 37135 |
| [19:50.370] |
Sounds nice. tīng qǐ lái bù cuò |
| [19:51.870] |
He does. He' s got brown hair and green eyes. dí què, tā yǒu zōng fā hé lǜ yǎn jīng |
| [19:54.940] |
No kidding? bú shì kāi wán xiào ba? |
| [19:57.810] |
I figured you' d have picked a blond. wǒ yǐ wéi nǐ huì xuǎn jīn fà de |
| [20:00.340] |
Really? Why? zhēn de ma? wèi shí me? |
| [20:02.480] |
I always pictured you with a tall, smart, blond guy with a name like... wǒ zǒng shì xiǎng xiàng nǐ hé yí gè gāo dà cōng míng de jīn fà nán zǐ, jiào |
| [20:07.550] |
... Hoyt. " hé yī" zhè yàng de míng zì |
| [20:11.220] |
It' s a name. Yeah. nà shi gè míng zì, méi cuò |
| [20:14.190] |
I saw you in this great house with a big pool. wǒ kàn dào nǐ zài yī jiān hěn bàng de yǒu yǒng chí de dà fáng zi |
| [20:19.160] |
Is he a swimmer? tā shì yóu yǒng xuǎn shǒu ma? |
| [20:21.700] |
He' s got the body for it. tā kě shì yǒu nà zhǒng shēn cái de |
| [20:24.400] |
I like that. wǒ xǐ huān |
| [20:28.640] |
What? shén me? |
| [20:29.910] |
You have a sign that says: nǐ men yǒu gè pái zi xiě zhe |
| [20:32.210] |
" We don' t swim in your toilet. Don' t pee in our pool." " wǒ men bù zài nǐ de cè suǒ yóu yǒng suǒ yǐ bié zài wǒ men de chí zi niào niào" |
| [20:35.550] |
We don' t have that sign. wǒ men cái bú huì yǒu nà zhǒng pái zi |
| [20:37.350] |
You do! It was a gift from me. nǐ huì yǒu de nà shi wǒ sòng de lǐ wù |
| [20:41.420] |
And you have three great kids. rán hòu nǐ huì yǒu hěn bàng de hái zi |
| [20:43.650] |
Two girls and a boy? liǎng gè nǚ hái hé yí gè nán hái? |
| [20:47.220] |
And they wear little water wings, and they run around on the deck. tā men dài zhuó shǒu bì fú quān rào zhe yǒng chí biān pǎo |
| [20:51.730] |
And Hoyt wraps a towel around all three of them. rán hòu hé yī yòng máo jīn wéi zhù tā men sān ge |
| [20:54.700] |
Sure. dāng rán |
| [21:02.040] |
But, you know, this way sounds good too. dàn shì, nǐ zhī dào zhè yàng tīng qǐ lái yě bù cuò |
| [21:06.780] |
Yeah. shì a |
| [21:20.560] |
Wow! This guy' s an astronaut? zhè jiā huǒ shì tài kōng rén? |
| [21:24.490] |
That would have been cool... zhè yàng suī rán hěn bàng |
| [21:27.300] |
... for a day. yě bú huì wéi chí duō jiǔ |
| [21:36.440] |
I called the sperm bank. wǒ dǎ diàn huà gěi jīng zǐ yín háng |
| [21:38.180] |
They haven' t sold a single unit of Tribbiani. cuī bǐ yà ní de xiǎo jiā huǒ yì diǎn ér yě méi mài chū qù |
| [21:41.750] |
Nobody wants my product. méi yǒu rén yào wǒ chū chǎn de |
| [21:45.420] |
I don' t get it. wǒ bù dǒng |
| [21:53.860] |
Maybe if they met me in person. kě néng tā men méi qīn yǎn jiàn dào wǒ |
|
You got a thing on your.... |
|
nǐ zhān dào yì diǎn zài |
|
Yeah. |
|
shì a |
|
Hello. |
|
hā luó |
|
Hello. |
|
hā luó |
|
Chan, can I talk to you for a second? |
|
qián dé, wǒ kě yǐ gēn nǐ tán yī xià ma? |
|
Sure. What' s up? |
|
dāng rán, shén me shì? |
|
Just one additional relationship thought. |
|
hái yǒu yī jiàn guān yú nán nǚ zhī jiān de shì |
|
Something you' re probably aware of. |
|
zhè jiàn shì nǐ dà gài yǐ jīng zhī dào le |
|
Women talk. |
|
nǚ rén huì hù xiāng chuán huà de |