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I took my son to the mall the other day to see santa claus |
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The woman in line behind me says "Hey is that Santa Claus up there?" |
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I said "No ma'm, it's a Kenny Rodgers stunt double |
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Here's your sign |
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The other day I bought a wreath to go on our front door |
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As I was walkin' out the store a man stopped me and said |
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"Hey, are you going to hang that on your door?" |
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I said "No sir, it's a Christmas toilet seat cover |
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Got the idea from Martha Stewart |
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Here's your sign, here's your sign, here's your stupid sign |
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You acted dumb, so have some fun and wear your stupid sign |
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Oh, here's your sign, here's your sign, here's your stupid sign |
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You lost your mind, so pay the fine and wear your stupid sign |
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I hung those little Christmas lights on my house |
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You know the kind that blink on and off |
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My neighbour comes over and says |
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"Bill how do you get those to blink on and off like that?" |
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I said "I've got my son inside pluggin', unpluggin' |
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Pluggin', unpluggin', here's your sign |
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I took my family to buy a Christmas tree the other night |
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When we walked onto the lot this guy walked up to me and says |
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"Hey, y'all here to buy a Christmas tree?" |
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I said, "No sir, my son needs to go to |
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The bathroom and these trees looked really inviting |
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Here's your sign, here's your sign, here's your stupid sign |
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You acted dumb, so have some fun and wear your stupid sign |
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Oh! here's your sign, here's your sign, here's your stupid sign |
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You lost your mind, so pay the fine and wear your stupid sign |
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Have no fear when you're spreading cheer during Christmas time |
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The other night my family and I were walking |
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Through the neighbourhood looking at all the Christmas decorations |
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When we came across this house that had a manger scene |
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Now there was this whole group of people looking at it |
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When I overheard this one guy say |
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"Hey, are those the three wise men?" |
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I said "No sir that's ZZ Top doin' a farming concert |
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Here's your sign, here's your sign, here's your stupid sign |
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You acted dumb, so have some fun and wear your stupid sign |
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Oh, here's your sign, here's your sign, here's your stupid sign |
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You lost your mind, so pay the fine and wear your stupid sign |
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Here's your sign, here's your sign, here's your stupid sign |
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have no fear when you're spreading cheer during Christmas time |
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And finally my wife and I were in a grocery store |
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The other day and I heard a woman ask the clerk |
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"Do you know what time midnight mass starts on Christmas eve?" |
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And in the holiday spirit I walked over and said "Here's your sign" |
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Happy holidays everybody |
