[00:02.89] | 你呀,干点正事吧, |
[00:03.97] | 整天到晚的啊, |
[00:05.95] | 你整天到晚的混得一点正型也没有, |
[00:09.65] | 你看看人家, 开好车的买大楼房, |
[00:12.87] | 你看看你,你是一无所有, |
[00:15.67] | 你脚下的地在抖,你身边的水在流, |
[00:19.51] | 你爸爸姓崔? |
[00:21.45] | 你爸爸叫贱(笑声,吁….) |
[00:24.08] | 2006年火了的这个人 |
[00:29.66] | 有人预计他红不过年根 |
[00:36.85] | 年头到年尾和官司有缘分 |
[00:43.88] | 依然红火他艺多不压身 |
[00:50.47] | 床前依然明月光, |
[00:52.30] | 疑似一片地上霜, |
[00:54.00] | 举头总得望明月, |
[00:55.65] | 我名还叫郭德纲。 |
[00:58.65] | 人干点好事总想让鬼神知道, |
[01:01.04] | 干点坏事总以为鬼神不知道, |
[01:04.05] | 我们太让鬼为难了. |
[01:07.77] | 娱乐圈里吵吵闹闹 |
[01:10.86] | 演个丫鬟要投怀送抱 |
[01:14.51] | 是非恩怨没有征兆 |
[01:17.43] | 不过争得是个龙套 |
[01:21.42] | 娱乐圈里装着炸药 |
[01:24.59] | 今天翻脸明天报料 |
[01:28.29] | 旧人在哭新人在笑 |
[01:31.19] | 赚得还是百姓腰包 |
[01:33.91] | 刚刚好 |
[01:35.94] | 我名气小 |
[01:40.62] | 刚刚好 |
[01:43.99] | 我胆子小 |
[01:48.28] | 三教九流各行各业 |
[01:51.49] | 他的工作都对社会有意义. |
[01:53.98] | 那怕是一个赶大车送菜的 |
[01:56.55] | 驾驾驾.喔喔喔… |
[01:59.82] | 我看着很羡慕啊, |
[02:01.75] | 我想夸他两句. |
[02:03.37] | 谁是我儿子?喔喔喔,哎呀, |
[02:08.13] | 给人民带来快乐. |
[02:10.12] | (谁给谁带来了快乐) |
[02:11.85] | 最起码我快乐了很多. |
[02:13.90] | 谁是我孙子? |
[02:16.24] | 喔喔喔哎呀喝(这位也不长记性.) |
[02:20.29] | 谁是王八? |
[02:22.09] | (他说什么呀)他提着鞭子过来了. |
[02:24.70] | (那是要抽你)他有不厚道的一面. |
[02:29.44] | 周董and了费玉清? |
[02:32.47] | 孟广美sorry了众网民 |
[02:36.32] | 偷拍伤了阿娇的心 |
[02:39.37] | 张钰她睡觉睡出了名 |
[02:43.27] | 棚菲生了一个小千金 |
[02:46.19] | 张柏芝也跟着怀了孕 |
[02:49.95] | 石头疯了四两拨千斤 |
[02:53.02] | 整容整到了范冰冰 |
[02:55.78] | 刚刚好 |
[02:58.89] | 我没怀孕 |
[03:02.36] | 刚刚好 |
[03:05.70] | 我没拍电影 |
[03:11.75] | 遇事你别老望上看,你得望下看. |
[03:15.89] | 怎么望下看? |
[03:17.56] | 比如说啊,做买卖你赔钱了 |
[03:20.36] | ,那还有跳楼的呢, |
[03:22.34] | 看着他你不是很快乐吗. |
[03:25.46] | 诶.没错 |
[03:27.17] | 你这儿生一闺女,你恨得慌,那还有没孩子的呢. |
[03:30.02] | 啊 |
[03:31.17] | 你那失业了,那还有失身的呢. |
[03:34.53] | 这没可比性啊 |
[03:36.62] | 你想,你媳妇不要你了,他也没要我啊.(笑,吁…..) |
[03:40.40] | 娱记们乱点着鸳鸯 |
[03:43.11] | 钻石李baybay了李湘 |
[03:46.61] | 世界杯喊哑了黄健翔 |
[03:49.60] | 要选秀最好学师洋 |
[03:53.54] | 宪哥主持到了中央 |
[03:56.90] | 祖德要变性穿女装 |
[04:00.29] | 老太太死咬着赵忠祥 |
[04:03.35] | 隐私被博客全部暴光 |
[04:06.01] | 刚刚好 |
[04:09.23] | 我没乱讲 |
[04:12.98] | 刚刚好 |
[04:16.01] | 我还正常 |
[04:20.48] | 早上四点就得起,,出去练轻功去, |
[04:24.35] | 刚一出去,警察过来了,嗨,喊我,我心里不亏啊, |
[04:29.79] | 我可没犯事啊,干嘛啊,晨练都不许嘛, |
[04:34.06] | 许!回去把裤子穿上….(笑声) |
[04:38.39] | 干什么也没有光着出来的),起猛了.(笑声) |
[04:41.69] | 到底为什么我们有点厌倦 |
[04:48.67] | 到底怎样明星才能成仙 |
[04:54.28] | 得道去西天 |
[04:58.86] | 能不能还要脸 |
[05:02.75] | 刚刚好 |
[05:04.03] | 我没疯癫 |
[05:08.52] | 刚刚好 |
[05:10.95] | 我有于谦 |
[05:16.23] | 刚刚好 就快过年 |
[00:02.89] | ni ya, gan dian zheng shi ba, |
[00:03.97] | zheng tian dao wan de a, |
[00:05.95] | ni zheng tian dao wan de hun de yi dian zheng xing ye mei you, |
[00:09.65] | ni kan kan ren jia, kai hao che de mai da lou fang, |
[00:12.87] | ni kan kan ni, ni shi yi wu suo you, |
[00:15.67] | ni jiao xia de di zai dou, ni shen bian de shui zai liu, |
[00:19.51] | ni ba ba xing cui? |
[00:21.45] | ni ba ba jiao jian xiao sheng, xu. |
[00:24.08] | 2006 nian huo le de zhe ge ren |
[00:29.66] | you ren yu ji ta hong bu guo nian gen |
[00:36.85] | nian tou dao nian wei he guan si you yuan fen |
[00:43.88] | yi ran hong huo ta yi duo bu ya shen |
[00:50.47] | chuang qian yi ran ming yue guang, |
[00:52.30] | yi si yi pian di shang shuang, |
[00:54.00] | ju tou zong dei wang ming yue, |
[00:55.65] | wo ming hai jiao guo de gang. |
[00:58.65] | ren gan dian hao shi zong xiang rang gui shen zhi dao, |
[01:01.04] | gan dian huai shi zong yi wei gui shen bu zhi dao, |
[01:04.05] | wo men tai rang gui wei nan le. |
[01:07.77] | yu le quan li chao chao nao nao |
[01:10.86] | yan ge ya huan yao tou huai song bao |
[01:14.51] | shi fei en yuan mei you zheng zhao |
[01:17.43] | bu guo zheng de shi ge long tao |
[01:21.42] | yu le quan li zhuang zhe zha yao |
[01:24.59] | jin tian fan lian ming tian bao liao |
[01:28.29] | jiu ren zai ku xin ren zai xiao |
[01:31.19] | zuan de hai shi bai xing yao bao |
[01:33.91] | gang gang hao |
[01:35.94] | wo ming qi xiao |
[01:40.62] | gang gang hao |
[01:43.99] | wo dan zi xiao |
[01:48.28] | san jiao jiu liu ge hang ge ye |
[01:51.49] | ta de gong zuo dou dui she hui you yi yi. |
[01:53.98] | na pa shi yi ge gan da che song cai de |
[01:56.55] | jia jia jia. wo wo o |
[01:59.82] | wo kan zhe hen xian mu a, |
[02:01.75] | wo xiang kua ta liang ju. |
[02:03.37] | shui shi wo er zi? wo wo o, ai ya, |
[02:08.13] | gei ren min dai lai kuai le. |
[02:10.12] | shui gei shui dai lai le kuai le |
[02:11.85] | zui qi ma wo kuai le le hen duo. |
[02:13.90] | shui shi wo sun zi? |
[02:16.24] | wo wo o ai ya he zhe wei ye bu zhang ji xing. |
[02:20.29] | shui shi wang ba? |
[02:22.09] | ta shuo shi mo ya ta ti zhe bian zi guo lai le. |
[02:24.70] | na shi yao chou ni ta you bu hou dao de yi mian. |
[02:29.44] | zhou dong and le fei yu qing? |
[02:32.47] | meng guang mei sorry le zhong wang min |
[02:36.32] | tou pai shang le a jiao de xin |
[02:39.37] | zhang yu ta shui jiao shui chu le ming |
[02:43.27] | peng fei sheng le yi ge xiao qian jin |
[02:46.19] | zhang bo zhi ye gen zhe huai le yun |
[02:49.95] | shi tou feng le si liang bo qian jin |
[02:53.02] | zheng rong zheng dao le fan bing bing |
[02:55.78] | gang gang hao |
[02:58.89] | wo mei huai yun |
[03:02.36] | gang gang hao |
[03:05.70] | wo mei pai dian ying |
[03:11.75] | yu shi ni bie lao wang shang kan, ni de wang xia kan. |
[03:15.89] | zen me wang xia kan? |
[03:17.56] | bi ru shuo a, zuo mai mai ni pei qian le |
[03:20.36] | , na hai you tiao lou de ne, |
[03:22.34] | kan zhe ta ni bu shi hen kuai le ma. |
[03:25.46] | ei. mei cuo |
[03:27.17] | ni zhe er sheng yi gui nv, ni hen de huang, na hai you mei hai zi de ne. |
[03:30.02] | a |
[03:31.17] | ni na shi ye le, na hai you shi shen de ne. |
[03:34.53] | zhe mei ke bi xing a |
[03:36.62] | ni xiang, ni xi fu bu yao ni le, ta ye mei yao wo a. xiao, xu.. |
[03:40.40] | yu ji men luan dian zhao yuan yang |
[03:43.11] | zuan shi li baybay le li xiang |
[03:46.61] | shi jie bei han ya le huang jian xiang |
[03:49.60] | yao xuan xiu zui hao xue shi yang |
[03:53.54] | xian ge zhu chi dao le zhong yang |
[03:56.90] | zu de yao bian xing chuan nv zhuang |
[04:00.29] | lao tai tai si yao zhe zhao zhong xiang |
[04:03.35] | yin si bei bo ke quan bu bao guang |
[04:06.01] | gang gang hao |
[04:09.23] | wo mo luan jiang |
[04:12.98] | gang gang hao |
[04:16.01] | wo hai zheng chang |
[04:20.48] | zao shang si dian jiu de qi,, chu qu lian qing gong qu, |
[04:24.35] | gang yi chu qu, jing cha guo lai le, hai, han wo, wo xin li bu kui a, |
[04:29.79] | wo ke mei fan shi a, gan ma a, chen lian dou bu xu ma, |
[04:34.06] | xu! hui qu ba ku zi chuan shang. xiao sheng |
[04:38.39] | gan shen me ye mei you guang zhe chu lai de, qi meng le. xiao sheng |
[04:41.69] | dao di wei shi me wo men you dian yan juan |
[04:48.67] | dao di zen yang ming xing cai neng cheng xian |
[04:54.28] | de dao qu xi tian |
[04:58.86] | neng bu neng hai yao lian |
[05:02.75] | gang gang hao |
[05:04.03] | wo mei feng dian |
[05:08.52] | gang gang hao |
[05:10.95] | wo you yu qian |
[05:16.23] | gang gang hao jiu kuai guo nian |
[00:02.89] | nǐ ya, gàn diǎn zhèng shì ba, |
[00:03.97] | zhěng tiān dào wǎn de a, |
[00:05.95] | nǐ zhěng tiān dào wǎn de hùn dé yì diǎn zhèng xíng yě méi yǒu, |
[00:09.65] | nǐ kàn kàn rén jiā, kāi hǎo chē de mǎi dà lóu fáng, |
[00:12.87] | nǐ kàn kàn nǐ, nǐ shì yī wú suǒ yǒu, |
[00:15.67] | nǐ jiǎo xià de dì zài dǒu, nǐ shēn biān de shuǐ zài liú, |
[00:19.51] | nǐ bà bà xìng cuī? |
[00:21.45] | nǐ bà bà jiào jiàn xiào shēng, xū. |
[00:24.08] | 2006 nián huǒ le de zhè gè rén |
[00:29.66] | yǒu rén yù jì tā hóng bù guò nián gēn |
[00:36.85] | nián tóu dào nián wěi hé guān sī yǒu yuán fèn |
[00:43.88] | yī rán hóng huǒ tā yì duō bù yā shēn |
[00:50.47] | chuáng qián yī rán míng yuè guāng, |
[00:52.30] | yí sì yī piàn dì shàng shuāng, |
[00:54.00] | jǔ tóu zǒng děi wàng míng yuè, |
[00:55.65] | wǒ míng hái jiào guō dé gāng. |
[00:58.65] | rén gàn diǎn hǎo shì zǒng xiǎng ràng guǐ shén zhī dào, |
[01:01.04] | gàn diǎn huài shì zǒng yǐ wéi guǐ shén bù zhī dào, |
[01:04.05] | wǒ men tài ràng guǐ wéi nán le. |
[01:07.77] | yú lè quān lǐ chāo chao nào nào |
[01:10.86] | yǎn gè yā huán yào tóu huái sòng bào |
[01:14.51] | shì fēi ēn yuàn méi yǒu zhēng zhào |
[01:17.43] | bù guò zhēng de shì gè lóng tào |
[01:21.42] | yú lè quān lǐ zhuāng zhe zhà yào |
[01:24.59] | jīn tiān fān liǎn míng tiān bào liào |
[01:28.29] | jiù rén zài kū xīn rén zài xiào |
[01:31.19] | zuàn de hái shì bǎi xìng yāo bāo |
[01:33.91] | gāng gāng hǎo |
[01:35.94] | wǒ míng qì xiǎo |
[01:40.62] | gāng gāng hǎo |
[01:43.99] | wǒ dǎn zi xiǎo |
[01:48.28] | sān jiào jiǔ liú gè háng gè yè |
[01:51.49] | tā de gōng zuò dōu duì shè huì yǒu yì yì. |
[01:53.98] | nà pà shì yí gè gǎn dà chē sòng cài de |
[01:56.55] | jià jià jià. wō wō ō |
[01:59.82] | wǒ kàn zhe hěn xiàn mù a, |
[02:01.75] | wǒ xiǎng kuā tā liǎng jù. |
[02:03.37] | shuí shì wǒ ér zi? wō wō ō, āi yā, |
[02:08.13] | gěi rén mín dài lái kuài lè. |
[02:10.12] | shuí gěi shuí dài lái le kuài lè |
[02:11.85] | zuì qǐ mǎ wǒ kuài lè le hěn duō. |
[02:13.90] | shuí shì wǒ sūn zi? |
[02:16.24] | wō wō ō āi yā hē zhè wèi yě bù zhǎng jì xìng. |
[02:20.29] | shuí shì wáng bā? |
[02:22.09] | tā shuō shí mǒ ya tā tí zhe biān zi guò lái le. |
[02:24.70] | nà shi yào chōu nǐ tā yǒu bù hòu dào de yī miàn. |
[02:29.44] | zhōu dǒng and le fèi yù qīng? |
[02:32.47] | mèng guǎng měi sorry le zhòng wǎng mín |
[02:36.32] | tōu pāi shāng le ā jiāo de xīn |
[02:39.37] | zhāng yù tā shuì jiào shuì chū le míng |
[02:43.27] | péng fēi shēng le yí gè xiǎo qiān jīn |
[02:46.19] | zhāng bó zhī yě gēn zhe huái le yùn |
[02:49.95] | shí tou fēng le sì liǎng bō qiān jīn |
[02:53.02] | zhěng róng zhěng dào le fàn bīng bīng |
[02:55.78] | gāng gāng hǎo |
[02:58.89] | wǒ méi huái yùn |
[03:02.36] | gāng gāng hǎo |
[03:05.70] | wǒ méi pāi diàn yǐng |
[03:11.75] | yù shì nǐ bié lǎo wàng shàng kàn, nǐ dé wàng xià kàn. |
[03:15.89] | zěn me wàng xià kàn? |
[03:17.56] | bǐ rú shuō a, zuò mǎi mài nǐ péi qián le |
[03:20.36] | , nà hái yǒu tiào lóu de ne, |
[03:22.34] | kàn zhe tā nǐ bú shì hěn kuài lè ma. |
[03:25.46] | éi. méi cuò |
[03:27.17] | nǐ zhè ér shēng yī guī nǚ, nǐ hèn dé huāng, nà hái yǒu méi hái zi de ne. |
[03:30.02] | a |
[03:31.17] | nǐ nà shī yè le, nà hái yǒu shī shēn de ne. |
[03:34.53] | zhè méi kě bǐ xìng a |
[03:36.62] | nǐ xiǎng, nǐ xí fù bú yào nǐ le, tā yě méi yào wǒ a. xiào, xū.. |
[03:40.40] | yú jì men luàn diǎn zháo yuān yāng |
[03:43.11] | zuàn shí lǐ baybay le lǐ xiāng |
[03:46.61] | shì jiè bēi hǎn yǎ le huáng jiàn xiáng |
[03:49.60] | yào xuǎn xiù zuì hào xué shī yáng |
[03:53.54] | xiàn gē zhǔ chí dào le zhōng yāng |
[03:56.90] | zǔ dé yào biàn xìng chuān nǚ zhuāng |
[04:00.29] | lǎo tài tài sǐ yǎo zhe zhào zhōng xiáng |
[04:03.35] | yǐn sī bèi bó kè quán bù bào guāng |
[04:06.01] | gāng gāng hǎo |
[04:09.23] | wǒ mò luàn jiǎng |
[04:12.98] | gāng gāng hǎo |
[04:16.01] | wǒ hái zhèng cháng |
[04:20.48] | zǎo shàng sì diǎn jiù dé qǐ,, chū qù liàn qīng gōng qù, |
[04:24.35] | gāng yī chū qù, jǐng chá guò lái le, hāi, hǎn wǒ, wǒ xīn lǐ bù kuī a, |
[04:29.79] | wǒ kě méi fàn shì a, gàn ma a, chén liàn dōu bù xǔ ma, |
[04:34.06] | xǔ! huí qù bǎ kù zi chuān shang. xiào shēng |
[04:38.39] | gàn shén me yě méi yǒu guāng zhe chū lái de, qǐ měng le. xiào shēng |
[04:41.69] | dào dǐ wèi shí me wǒ men yǒu diǎn yàn juàn |
[04:48.67] | dào dǐ zěn yàng míng xīng cái néng chéng xiān |
[04:54.28] | dé dào qù xī tiān |
[04:58.86] | néng bù néng hái yào liǎn |
[05:02.75] | gāng gāng hǎo |
[05:04.03] | wǒ méi fēng diān |
[05:08.52] | gāng gāng hǎo |
[05:10.95] | wǒ yǒu yú qiān |
[05:16.23] | gāng gāng hǎo jiù kuài guò nián |