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I was Union Jacked, Kerouac'd |
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John Birched, stopped and searched |
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Rolling Stoned and Beatled till I'm blind |
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I've been Ayn Randed, nearly branded |
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Communist 'cos I'm lefthanded: |
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That's the hand they use, well, never mind! |
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I've been Walt Disneyed, Dis Disleyed |
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John Lennoned, Krishna Menoned |
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Walter Brennan punched out Cassius Clay |
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I've heard the truth from Lenny Bruce |
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and all my wealth won't buy me health |
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So I smoke a pint of tea a day |
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I knew a man his brain so small, |
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He couldn't think of nothin' at all. |
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He's not the same as you and me. |
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He doesn't dig poetry. He's so unhip that |
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When you say Dylan, he thinks you're talkin' about Dylan |
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Thomas, |
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Whoever he is. |
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The man ain't got no culture, |
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But its alright, Ma, |
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It's just sumpthin' I learned over in England. |
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I've been James Joyced, Rolls Royced |
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Mick Jaggered, silver daggered |
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Andy Warhol won't you please come home? |
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I've been mother, fathered, aunt and uncled |
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Tom Wilsoned, Art Garfunkled |
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Barry Kornfeld's mother's on the phone |
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When in London, do as I do |
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Find yourself a friendly haiku |
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Go to sleep for ten or fifteen years |