|
My mummy says I'm a miracle. |
|
My daddy says I'm his special little guy. |
|
I am a princess, |
|
And I am a prince. |
|
Mum says I'm an angel sent down from the sky. |
|
My daddy says I'm his special little soldier. |
|
No one is as handsome, strong as me. |
|
It's true he indulges my tendency to bulge, |
|
But I'm his little soldier! |
|
Hop, 2-4-3! |
|
[Chorus:] |
|
My mummy says I'm a miracle. |
|
One look at my face, and it's plain to see. |
|
Ever since the day doc chopped the umbilical cord, |
|
It's been clear there's no peer for a miracle like me! |
|
My daddy says I'm his special little soldier. |
|
No one is as bold or tough as me. |
|
Has my daddy told you, |
|
One day when I'm older, |
|
I can be a soldier, |
|
And shoot you in the face? |
|
One can hardly move for beauty and brilliance these days. |
|
It seems that there are millions of these one-in-a-millions these days. |
|
Special-ness seems de rigueur. |
|
Above average is average - go figure. |
|
Is it is some modern miracle of calculus, |
|
That such frequent miracles don't render each one un-miraculous? |
|
[Repeat Chorus] |
|
My mummy says I'm a precious barrelina. |
|
She has never seen a prettier barrelina. |
|
She says if I'm keen, I have to cut down on the cream, |
|
But I'm a barrelina, SO GIVE ME MORE CAKE! |
|
Take another picture of our angel in that costume that I made. |
|
The role of tree has never been portrayed with such convincing sway. |
|
That's right, honey, look at mummy! |
|
Don't put honey on your brother. |
|
Smile for mummy; smile for mother! |
|
I think she blinked. |
|
Well, take another! |
|
Have you seen his school report? He got a 'C' on his report! |
|
What?! |
|
We'll have to change his school. That teacher's clearly falling short. |
|
She's just delightful. So precarious and insightful. |
|
Might she be a little brighter than the norm? |
|
I know to boys it's frightful form! |
|
(Take another!) |
|
My mummy says I'm a miracle. |
|
(She looks lovely in this light.) |
|
One look at my face, and it's plain to see. |
|
(Honey... Honey...) |
|
Ever since the day doc chopped the umbilical cord, |
|
(Don't put honey on your brother.) |
|
It's been clear there's no peer for a miracle like me! |
|
My mummy says I'm a miracle. |
|
That I'm as tiny and as shiny as a mirror ball. |
|
You can be all cynical, but it's a truth empirical. |
|
There's never been a miracle, a miracle, a miracle as me! |
|
[Interlude] |
|
Every life I bring into this world restores my faith in humankind. |
|
Each new-born life, a canvas yet unpainted... |
|
This still unbroken skin... |
|
This uncorrupted mind... |
|
[Bridge:] |
|
Every life is unbelievably unlikely. |
|
The chances of existence, almost infinitely small. |
|
The most common thing in life is life, |
|
And yet every single life bearing new life is a miracle! |
|
Miracle! |
|
[Interlude] |
|
Oh, my undercarriage doesn't feel quite normal. |
|
My skin looks just revolting in this foul fluorescent light, |
|
And this gown is nothing like the semi-formal, semi-Spanish gown |
|
I should be wearing in the semi-finals tonight. |
|
I should be dancing the tarantella - |
|
Cui buon fare Italiano. [Italian: With good Italian manner] |
|
Not dressed in hospital cotton, |
|
With a smarting front bottom, |
|
And this horrible - |
|
(Miracle!) |
|
Smelly little - |
|
(Miracle!) |
|
Weakly little bowl of fat! |
|
(What the hell was that?) |
|
Would someone give this thing a bottle? |
|
Or swap it for a later model! |
|
Why do bad things always happen to good people? |
|
Fine, upstanding citizens like you and me? |
|
Why, when we've done nothing wrong, |
|
Should this disaster come along? |
|
This horrible, weird-looking, |
|
Hairy little stinky feet... |
|
With no sign of a winky-dink at all! |
|
Miracle! Miracle! |
|
She's a miracle! |
|
A Miracle! |
|
Every life's a miracle! |
|
The most beautiful miracle I have ever seen! |
|
I can't find his frank & beans! |
|
[Repeat Bridge] |
|
[Repeat Chorus] |
|
My mummy says I'm a lousy little worm. |
|
My daddy says I'm a bore. |
|
My mummy says I'm a jumped-up little germ, |
|
That kids like me should be against the law. |
|
My daddy says I should learn to shut my pie hole. |
|
No one likes a smart-mouthed girl like me. |
|
Mum says I'm a good case for population control. |
|
Dad says I should watch more TV. |
