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In the court of Augustine The Twelfth |
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The king reprimanded his men |
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And demanded they |
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Put to good use all his wealth |
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to cure his deep ennui |
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For you see, he found that he was sad and lonely |
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Ever since his wife, the queen, got mad and |
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Rode off on his steed |
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In a glen beyond the castle wall |
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There was a tinker |
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And he was a thinker |
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The smartest man in all the world |
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He made a mechanical girl |
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For you see, his daughter passed away that summer |
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And though he knew he could not replace her |
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He missed his family |
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Suddenly a knock at the door went ra-ta-ta-ta-ta |
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And the kingsmen came in blowing horns ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba |
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"By order of His Highness |
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We're to take you and that...thing |
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To present your marvel to the king." |
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And so, over glen and through the castle walls |
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Over the moat, and into the great castle hall |
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When her master urged, |
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The robot girl emerged |
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When the king laid eyes upon the girl |
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He was delighted |
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His men all were knighted |
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He yelled aloud for all the world |
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"I'll take her for my queen!" |
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And the man screamed |
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"Please don't take my child! |
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I beg you, mighty king!" |
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And they grabbed him by his tailcoat |
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And threw him in the moat |
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Later in their wedding bed |
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The king was shocked to see |
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A tender kiss upon the cheek |
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Unleashed an armory |
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Rocket launchers and flamethrowing guns |
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Grew from her sides |
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And she grew to seven times her size |
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Run! |
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On the morn of August twenty-fourth |
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He was dejected when lest he expected |
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A knock was heard upon the door |
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It was his robot girl |
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For you see, he'd made her indestructible |
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It seems and she destroyed that awful kingdom |
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And they lived happily. |
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So you see, the moral of the story is: |
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Never take a child away from a loving parent |
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Especially not ones who make children who shoot rockets from their eyes |