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Mr. Bad Example - Warren Zevon |
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I started as an alter boy working at the church |
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Learning all my holy moves doing some research |
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Which led me to a cash box labeled children's fund |
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I'd leave the change |
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And tuck the bills inside my cummerbund |
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I got a part time job at my father's carpet store |
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Laying tackless stripping |
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And housewives by the score |
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I loaded up their furniture |
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And took it to Spokane |
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And auctioned off every last naugahyde divan |
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I'm very well aquainted with the seven deadly sins |
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I keep a busy schedule trying to fit them in |
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I'm proud to be a glutton |
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And I don't have time for sloth |
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I'm greedy and I'm angry |
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And I don't care who I cross |
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I'm Mr Bad Example intruder in the dirt |
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I like to have a good time |
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And I don't care who gets hurt |
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I'm Mr Bad Example take a look at me |
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I'll live to be a hundred and go down in infamy |
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Of course I went to law school and took a law degree |
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And counseled all my clients to plead insanity |
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Then worked in hair replacement swindling the bald |
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Where very few are chosen and fewer still are called |
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Then on to Monte Carlo to play chemin de fer |
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I threw away the fortune I made transplanting hair |
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I put my last few francs down on a prostitute |
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Who took me up to her room to perform the flag salute |
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Whereupon I stole her passport and her wig |
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And headed for the airport |
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And the midnight flight you dig |
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And fourteen hours later I was down in Adelaide |
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Looking through the want ads sipping fosters in the shade |
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I opened up an agency somewhere down the line |
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To hire aboriginals to work the opal mines |
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But I attached their wages and took a whopping cut |
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And whisked away their workman's comp |
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And pauperized the lot |
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I'm Mr Bad Example intruder in the dirt |
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I like to have a good time |
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And I don't care who gets hurt |
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I'm Mr Bad Example take a look at me |
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I'll live to be a hundred and go down in infamy |
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I bought a first class ticket on Malaysian Air |
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And landed in Sri Lanka none the worse for wear |
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I'm thinking of retiring from all my dirty deals |
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I'll see you in the next life wake me up for meals |