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Down in the workshop all the elves were makin' toys |
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For the good |
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Gentile girls and the good |
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Gentile boys |
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When the boss busted in, nearly scared 'em half to death |
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Had a rifle in his hands and cheap whiskey on his breath |
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From his beard to his boots he was covered with ammo |
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Like a big fat drunk disgruntled |
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Yuletide Rambo |
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And he smiled and said, with a twinkle in his eye,"Merry Christmas to all, now you're all gonna die!" |
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The night |
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Santa went crazy |
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The night |
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St. Nick went insane |
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Realized he'd been gettin' a raw deal |
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Something finally must have snapped in his brain |
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Well, the workshop is gone now, he decided to bomb it |
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Everywhere you'll find pieces of |
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Cupid and |
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CometAnd he tied up his helpers and he held the elves hostage |
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And he ground up poor |
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Rudolph into reindeer sausage |
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He got Dancer and |
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Prancer with an old |
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German Luger |
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And he slashed up |
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Dasher just like |
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Freddie Krueger |
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And he picked up a flamethrower and barbecued |
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BlitzenAnd he took a big bite and said, "It tastes just like chicken!" |
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The night |
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Santa went crazy |
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The night |
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Kris Kringle went nuts |
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Now you can't hardly walk around the |
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North Pole |
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Without steppin' in reindeer guts |
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There's the |
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National Guard and the |
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F. B. I.There's a van from the |
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Eyewitness |
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NewsAnd helicopters circlin' 'round in the sky |
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And the bullets are flyin', the body count's risin' |
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And everyone's dyin' to know, oh |
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Santa, why? |
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My my my my my my |
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You used to be such a jolly guy |
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Yes, Virginia, now |
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Santa's doing time |
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In a federal prison for his infamous crime |
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Hey, little friend, now don't you cry no more tears |
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He'll be out with good behavior in 700 more years |
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But now Vixen's in therapy and |
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Donner's still nervous |
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And the elves all got jobs working for the postal service |
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And they say |
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Mrs. Claus, she's on the phone every night |
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With her lawyer negotiating the movie rights |
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They're talkin 'bout the night |
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Santa went crazy |
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The night |
|
St. Nicholas flipped |
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Broke his back for some milk and cookies |
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Sounds to me like he was tired of gettin' gypped |
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Wo, the night |
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Santa went crazy |
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The night |
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St. Nick went insane |
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Realized he'd been gettin' a raw deal |
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Something finally must have snapped in his brain |
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Wo, something finally must have snapped in his brain |
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Tell ya, something finally must have snapped... in his brain |
