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I know a fat old policeman |
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He's always on our street |
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A fat and jolly red-faced man |
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He really is a treat |
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He's too kind for a policeman |
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He's never known to frown |
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And everybody says |
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He is the happiest man in town! |
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He laughs upon point duty |
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He laughs upon his beat |
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He laughs at everybody |
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When he's walking in the street |
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He never can stop laughing |
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He says he's never tried |
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But once he did arrest a man |
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And laughed until he cried! |
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His jolly face is wrinkled |
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And then he shut his eyes |
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He opened his great big mouth |
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It was a wonderous size! |
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He said: "I must arrest you!" |
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He didn't know what for |
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And then he started laughing |
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Until he cracked his jaw! |
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So if you chance to meet him |
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While walking 'round the town |
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Shake him by his fat ol' hand |
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And give him half a crown |
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His eyes will beam and sparkle |
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He'll gurgle with delight |
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And then you'll start him laughing |
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With all his blessed might! |
