| [00:02.232] |
When I was a little girl |
| [00:06.759] |
Like really little - like eight or so |
| [00:10.489] |
I was playing in my father's study |
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A place in the house I wasn't supposed to go |
| [00:18.984] |
My father fancied himself a sailor |
| [00:23.496] |
His study was filled with nautical decor |
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He kept a boat in a bottle on the top of a shelf |
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And it shattered on the ground when I slammed the door |
| [00:34.409] |
I told my mother everything |
| [00:37.863] |
I told her I was so so sorry |
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She told me "don't cry |
| [00:44.224] |
When he comes home tonight |
| [00:46.133] |
We can make everything okay |
| [00:50.378] |
This is all we have to say: |
| [00:54.626] |
We don't remember a boat in a bottle |
| [00:58.620] |
It must have fallen off its shelf alone |
| [01:03.344] |
We know you loved it |
| [01:04.148] |
We're so sad it's broken |
| [01:07.062] |
But neither one of us was even home |
| [01:10.014] |
And it's our word yes, our word, against his" |
| [01:17.453] |
So I hid screwups from my father |
| [01:21.453] |
Made up school awards to please my mom |
| [01:25.708] |
Whatever made the steak taste better |
| [01:29.950] |
Whatever kept the waters calm |
| [01:34.209] |
I was told to keep their secrets |
| [01:38.213] |
And in turn they'd keep mine |
| [01:42.450] |
As I got older, I got dumber |
| [01:46.442] |
I couldn't help but cross the line |
| [01:49.627] |
Three times I nearly wrecked my life |
| [01:53.103] |
Three times I nearly came to ruin |
| [01:57.101] |
Three times went crying |
| [01:59.223] |
To my parents |
| [02:01.338] |
Who said they'd make it go away |
| [02:05.591] |
Yes, this is all we had to say: |
| [02:09.847] |
"we never rented a house in sedona |
| [02:13.837] |
We didn't see camille the day she died |
| [02:18.078] |
We haven't been on our boat in some years now |
| [02:22.070] |
So we don't care what you found inside |
| [02:25.262] |
And it's our word yes, our word |
| [02:30.030] |
It's our word yes, our word against theirs." |
| [02:44.071] |
Somebody was paid to make it go away |
| [02:52.293] |
Everyone was paid to make the problems go away |
| [03:00.535] |
Doesn't matter who gets screwed or who is blamed |
| [03:05.321] |
Or what you need to do to clear your name |
| [03:09.855] |
An inconvenient truth can be easily erased |
| [03:20.514] |
When I was twenty-six |
| [03:25.033] |
I was living in new york |
| [03:29.016] |
I developed some fun habits |
| [03:33.266] |
Put my white blood cells to work |
| [03:37.513] |
I remember it so clearly |
| [03:41.487] |
I was home alone on a tuesday night |
| [03:45.747] |
To level out I popped some downers |
| [03:49.727] |
But couldn't seem to get my mind right |
| [03:53.973] |
I drew a bath, and slipped into it |
| [03:57.705] |
And suddenly became aware |
| [04:02.230] |
I couldn't keep my head above water |
| [04:06.146] |
I took a final gasp of air |
| [04:09.604] |
And as I lay there helplessly |
| [04:13.057] |
A million different thoughts came to me |
| [04:17.305] |
I saw my parents |
| [04:19.177] |
Hearing the news |
| [04:21.030] |
"your only daughter drowned today" |
| [04:25.547] |
I thought about what they might say |
| [04:29.528] |
"our daughter Judith? |
| [04:30.860] |
No she moved to austin |
| [04:33.787] |
She's very happy there |
| [04:35.120] |
Or so we hear |
| [04:37.805] |
She's always been so goddamned independent |
| [04:42.064] |
The years go by and now we barely see her |
| [04:46.311] |
Our daughter Judith? you must be mistaken |
| [04:50.557] |
You mean the girl we raised as if our own? |
| [04:54.532] |
We loved her so much |
| [04:56.141] |
She felt like our child |
| [04:58.787] |
But eventually we had to send her home" |
| [05:01.972] |
It'd be their word |
| [05:04.103] |
Only their word |
| [05:06.235] |
It'd be their word |
| [05:08.612] |
Only their word |
| [05:13.405] |
On its own |
