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Mom, I know I let you down |
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And though you say the days are happy |
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Why is the power off, and I'm ******* up? |
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And mom, I know he's not around |
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But don't you place the blame on me |
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As you pour yourself another drink |
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I guess we are who we are |
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Headlights *******ning in the dark night I drive on |
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Maybe we took this too far |
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I went in headfirst |
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Never thinking about who what I said hurt, in what verse |
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My mom probably got it the worst |
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The brunt of it, but as stubborn as we are |
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Did I take it too far? |
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Cleaning out my closet and all them other songs |
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But regardless I don't hate you cause ma! |
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You're still beautiful to me, cause you're my mom |
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Though far be it for you to be calling, my house was Vietnam |
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Desert Storm and both of us put together can form an atomic bomb equivalent to Chemical warfare |
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And forever we can drag this on and on |
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But, agree to disagree |
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That gift from me up under the Chris*******as tree don't mean *******t to me |
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You're kicking me out? It's 15 degrees and it's Chris*******as Eve (little ******* just leave) |
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Ma, let me grab my ******* coat, anything to have each other's goats |
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Why we always at each others throats? Especially when dad, he ******* us both |
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We're in the same ******* boat, you'd think that it'd make us close (nope) |
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Further away that drove us, but together headlights *******ne, a car full of belongings |
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Still got a ways to go, back to grandma's house it's straight up the road |
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And I was the man of the house, the oldest, so my shoulders carried the weight of the load |
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Then Nate got taken away by the state at 8 years old, and |
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That's when I realized you were sick and it wasn't fixable or changable |
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And to this day we remained estranged and I hate it though, but |
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I guess we are who we are |
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Headlights *******ning in the dark night I drive on |
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Maybe we took this too far |
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Cause to this day we remain estranged and I hate it though |
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Cause you ain't even get to witness your grand baby's growth |
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But I'm sorry mama for Cleaning Out My Closet, at the time I was angry |
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Rightfully maybe so, never meant that far to take it though, cause |
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Now I know it's not your fault, and I'm not making jokes |
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That song I no longer play at shows and I cringe every time it's on the radio |
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And I think of Nathan being placed in a home |
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And all the medicine you fed us |
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And how I just wanted you to taste your own, but |
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Now the medications taken over and your mental states deteriorating slow |
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And I'm way too old to cry, that *******t's painful though |
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But ma, I forgive you, so does Nathan yo |
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All you did, all you said, you did your best to raise us both |
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Foster care, that cross you bare, few may be as heavy as yours |
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But I love you Debbie Mathers, oh what a tangled web we have, cause |
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One thing I never asked was where the ******* my deadbeat dad was |
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******* it I guess he had trouble keeping up with every address |
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But I'd have flipped every mattress, every rock and desert cactus |
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Own a collection of maps and followed my kids to the edge of the atlas |
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Someone ever moved them from me? That you could bet your ass's |
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If I had to come down the chimney dressed as Santa, kidnap them |
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And although one has met their grandma |
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Once you pulled up in our drive one night as we were leaving to get some handburgers |
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Me, her and Nate, we introduced you, hugged you |
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And as you left I had this overwhelming sadness come over me |
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As we pulled off to go our separate paths, and |
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I saw your headlights as I looked back |
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And I'm mad I didn't get the chance to thank you for being my Mom and my Dad |
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So Mom, please accept this as a tribute I wrote this on the jet |
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I guess I had to get this off my chest, I hope I get the chance to lay it before I'm dead |
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The stewardess said to fasten my seatbelt, I guess we're cra*******ng |
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So if I'm not dreaming, I hope you this message that I'll always love you from afar |
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Cause you're my mama... |
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I guess we are who we are |
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Headlights *******ning in the dark night I drive on |
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Maybe we took this too far |
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I want a new life |
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One without a cause |
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So I'm coming home tonight |
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Well no matter what the cost |
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And if the plane goes down |
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And if the crew can't wake me up |
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Just know that I was alright |
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And I was not afraid to die |
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Even if there's songs to sing |
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My children will carry me |
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Just know that I'm alright |
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I was not afraid to die |
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Because I put my faith in my little girl |
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So I never say goodbye cruel world |
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Just know that I'm alright |
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I am not afraid to die |
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I guess we are who we are |
[05:26.850] |
Headlights *******ning in the dark night I drive on |
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Maybe we took this too far |
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I want a new life |