| [00:02.10] | Aren't you excited we're going on our honeymoon? |
| [00:05.07] | Yeah, I am. |
| [00:09.44] | That's right, get it out of your system while we're alone. |
| [00:13.17] | -Hey. We came to say goodbye. -Yeah. Have a great honeymoon. - |
| [00:17.21] | -Thanks. -I better go pack. - |
| [00:19.21] | No, I already packed. The only thing I couldn't find, though, was your Speedo. |
| [00:26.02] | Speedo? I don't have a Speedo. |
| [00:29.92] | I'm gonna go pack my regular, long bathing suit. |
| [00:36.30] | Good, you're still here! I wanted to tell you to have a good honeymoon. |
| [00:40.17] | Thank you! |
| [00:41.87] | And I also wanted you guys to know that I am telling the father today. |
| [00:50.58] | What? What? |
| [00:53.92] | -We know it's Ross. -How? How do you know? - |
| [00:57.49] | It was his sweater. But, oh, my God! |
| [01:01.02] | I so wanted Ross to know first. But I am so relieved that you guys know! |
| [01:05.13] | That is so great. And I'm gonna be your baby's aunt! |
| [01:07.83] | I know. |
| [01:09.20] | Me too! |
| [01:11.17] | And I'm gonna be an uncle! Come here. |
| [01:14.74] | -You're all gonna be aunts and uncles. -Yeah, but I'm the only one related by blood. - |
| [01:20.44] | So now that you all know, you can help me. Give me some advice on how to tell Ross. |
| [01:26.38] | What were you gonna say? |
| [01:27.92] | I was gonna tell him that I'm gonna have it, and he can be as involved as he wants. |
| [01:32.42] | Well, that sounds good. |
| [01:34.32] | Yeah, but, you know, how do I start? I mean, what's the first thing that I say? |
| [01:42.40] | -Okay, great. Thanks. -Hey, good luck. - |
| [01:46.00] | Yeah, bye. |
| [01:48.77] | Hey, what was that all about? |
| [01:50.67] | Guess there's no harm in telling you now. Rachel and Ross are going to have a baby. |
| [01:55.14] | What?! I didn't even know that..! Why didn't you tell me? |
| [02:01.28] | Why am I talking like this? |
| [02:05.25] | -I didn't think you could keep it a secret. -What?! - |
| [02:10.96] | What?! |
| [02:13.13] | I am an excellent secret-keeper. I have kept all our secrets. |
| [02:16.97] | -What secrets? -No, no, Joey. |
| [02:19.47] | I'm not gonna tell you, because I am an excellent secret-keeper. |
| [02:27.01] | -You'll tell me later? -You already know. - |
| [02:31.28] | The One Where Rachel Tells |
| [00:00.00] | |
| [03:10.79] | It's so romantic to send people off on their honeymoon. |
| [03:15.12] | You know, Monica and Chandler are married. Ross and Rachel are having a baby. |
| [03:19.53] | -Maybe you and I should do something. -All in good time, my love. All in good time. - |
| [03:27.17] | Shoot! I left my guitar in their apartment. Well, you can let me in later, right? |
| [03:31.67] | No, I don't have a key. They took mine to give to you. |
| [03:34.34] | -What? They took mine to give to you. -Why would they take away our keys? - |
| [03:39.58] | Maybe they don't trust us. |
| [03:41.25] | They let me keep my key the last time they were out of town. |
| [03:44.35] | The time you broke the ketchup bottle and cleaned it with Monica's guest towels? |
| [03:49.46] | -Hey, I washed those. -No, you didn't. - |
| [03:52.46] | Yeah, that didn't sound like me. |
| [03:55.70] | -What will I do? I really need my guitar. -I have stuff in there too. - |
| [04:00.17] | -What stuff? -Monica's chicken parm. I'll take care of it. - |
| [04:06.54] | Hey, Mr. Treeger? It's Joey Tribbiani. |
| [04:08.84] | Listen, I need to get into Monica and Chandler's apartment. It's an emergency! |
| [04:14.88] | Gas leak. Oh, and bring garlic bread. |
| [04:21.16] | -Hey, did Monica and Chandler take off yet? -Yeah. - |
| [04:24.26] | Damn. They left without my pass to the Nassau Fossil and Natural History Museum. |
| [04:29.76] | There goes the honeymoon. |
| [04:32.30] | -Did Rachel find you? -No, why? |
| [04:35.27] | She was looking for you. |
| [04:37.71] | Well, I guess I'll catch up with her later. |
| [04:41.31] | -She really wanted to talk to you now. -Yeah, it seemed pretty important. - |
| [04:48.55] | Oh, no. |
| [04:50.32] | What? |
| [04:52.42] | I think I might know what this is about. |
| [04:57.39] | Really? |
| [04:58.89] | Yeah. We promised we weren't gonna tell anybody this, but.. |
| [05:05.40] | About a month ago, Rachel and I slept together. |
| [05:09.90] | And? |
| [05:15.18] | Wow, I thought you'd be a little more shocked. |
| [05:18.98] | Oh, sorry. And?! |
| [05:25.32] | Well, we said we'd just do it that one time.. |
| [05:29.89] | but now I think she may wanna start things up again. |
| [05:33.96] | Yeah, I don't think that's what it is. |
| [05:37.63] | -Why? What else could it be? -Oh, wow, I don't feel well. - |
| [05:44.44] | I'm telling you, that's what it is. |
| [05:47.74] | No wonder she was looking at me all funny during the wedding. |
| [05:52.85] | She didn't say anything to you? |
| [05:55.25] | -Maybe it's something you ate. -Could be, yeah. - |
| [05:58.45] | -Please, just go and talk to Rachel. -Yeah, I guess I should. - |
| [06:05.06] | Man, you know what I have to realize? |
| [06:07.73] | Maybe I'm not the type of guy women can have just one night with. |
| [06:13.47] | You know, they always seem to want a little bit more. |
| [06:19.81] | I should remember that. |
| [06:31.59] | Next. |
| [06:34.02] | -They're kissing. Let's just go around them. -Leave them alone. They're in love. - |
| [06:37.89] | I'm in love too. But in an orderly fashion. |
| [06:41.50] | Next. |
| [06:43.03] | Hi. Can you do that and walk? Because she said, "Next." |
| [06:47.34] | Sorry, we didn't hear you. We're on our honeymoon. |
| [06:52.11] | Let me see what I can do. There are some first-class seats available. |
| [06:58.35] | They bumped them up to first class because they're on their honeymoon! |
| [07:02.15] | -Let's act like we're on our honeymoon. -We are on our honeymoon. - |
| [07:06.82] | Grab my ass. |
| [07:09.99] | -Next. -Hi. Sorry, I almost didn't hear you. - |
| [07:13.19] | You know, I'm just so in love with my new husband. We're on our honeymoon. |
| [07:17.73] | -Congratulations. -Thanks. - |
| [07:19.77] | Okay, Mr. Bing, you'll be in 25J, and Mrs. Bing, you're in 25K. |
| [07:25.14] | We're on our honeymoon, so can you do your little thing and bump us to first class? |
| [07:30.01] | I'm sorry, all the first-class seats are taken. That couple got the last two. |
| [07:33.95] | See? If we'd gone around them like I said, she'd have given us those tickets! Damn it! |
| [07:39.85] | 25J and K, any chance those aren't together? 25J |
| [07:51.97] | I still can't believe they took away my key. I mean, you trust me with yours. |
| [07:56.10] | Of course I do! And I'm gonna get it back to you.. |
| [07:58.84] | just as soon as they're done with it at the key-shining place. |
| [08:06.28] | -What the hell is that? -I don't know. - |
| [08:09.52] | Treeger, what are you doing? |
| [08:12.09] | -You said there was a gas leak. -Why not use your key? - |
| [08:14.99] | By the time I found it on this thing, the whole place might have exploded. |
| [08:18.63] | If that happens at another building I manage, people will ask questions. |
| [08:22.46] | Come on, hurry up! |
| [08:27.13] | Well, we could have done that. |
| [08:32.37] | Look at that! They're going into the first-class lounge. |
| [08:35.91] | -Do you know what they have in there? -No. - |
| [08:38.11] | Me neither. We have to get in! |
| [08:42.35] | -Just act like you belong. -Oh, my God! Oranges! - |
| [08:48.06] | -Nice to see you again. -Sir, may I see your tickets, please? - |
| [08:53.33] | Yes, of course. |
| [08:56.16] | Would you move your thumb? I can't see the seat number. |
| [08:58.93] | That's all right. I have it memorized. It's 1A. |
| [09:04.67] | -Sir, this isn't a first-class ticket. I'm sorry. -Apology accepted. Excuse us. - |
| [09:08.81] | Sir, I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you to leave. |
| [09:14.12] | Fine. |
| [09:17.08] | Go, go! |
| [09:31.87] | -Hi. -Hi. |
| [09:33.73] | Hi. |
| [09:36.47] | I think there's something that we really need to talk about. |
| [09:39.87] | I think we do. Why don't we go inside. |
| [09:49.68] | -Look, I know why you're here. -You do? - |
| [09:54.56] | Yeah, and to save you from any embarrassment.. |
| [09:57.93] | I think maybe I should talk first. |
| [10:01.03] | -Okay. -Okay? |
| [10:12.01] | Ross and Rachel. |
| [10:14.58] | Rachel and Ross. |
| [10:18.78] | That's been one heck of a seesaw, hasn't it? |
| [10:23.62] | What? |
| [10:25.55] | I mean, look, that one night we had was fun and certainly passionate. |
| [10:31.99] | But don't you think it's better if we just stay friends? |
| [10:37.80] | Seriously, what? |
| [10:41.17] | Okay. You know what? |
| [10:44.74] | If you want to, we can do it one more time. |
| [10:51.41] | I mean, I'd be okay with that. In fact, I have some time right now.. |
| [10:55.95] | Okay. |
| [10:57.25] | You know what? Can I talk now? |
| [10:59.35] | -Oh, sure. -Okay. - |
| [11:07.70] | I'm pregnant. |
| [11:14.00] | Ross? |
| [11:20.21] | Ross? |
| [11:22.64] | Okay, whenever you're ready. |
| [11:32.55] | And you're the father, by the way. But you got.. |
| [11:40.16] | -Can I get you some water? -I'm good. - |
| [11:44.77] | Ross, there is no pressure on you, okay? I mean, you can be as involved as you want. |
| [11:54.54] | |
| [11:56.84] | I'm just, I don't know. I don't understand.. |
| [12:02.42] | how this happened. |
| [12:07.39] | -We used a condom. -I know. - |
| [12:10.56] | But you know, condoms only work, like,97 percent of the time. |
| [12:16.06] | What? |
| [12:19.93] | What?! |
| [12:22.74] | Well, they should put that on the box! |
| [12:28.91] | -They do. -No, they don't! - |
| [12:37.62] | Well, they should put it in huge block letters! |
| [12:42.06] | -Ross, let's just forget about the condoms. -Well, I may as well have! - |
| [12:49.26] | Listen, you know what? I was really freaked out too.. |
| [12:52.20] | -when I found out. -Freaked..? Hey, I'm not freaked out. - |
| [12:56.17] | I'm indignant as a consumer! |
| [13:00.88] | -You know what? Let's talk later. -No, I wanna talk now. - |
| [13:05.35] | In fact, I wanna talk.. |
| [13:07.68] | to the president of the condom company. |
| [13:12.02] | Okay, you know what? Maybe I should come back.. Okay. |
| [13:15.72] | Yeah, I'll press one! |
| [13:21.96] | -I looked everywhere. There's no gas leak. -So then I can heat this up? - |
| [13:28.27] | Anyway, I'll get moving on that new door. |
| [13:30.74] | Great. Listen, could you do us a favor and not tell Chandler and Monica about this? |
| [13:35.88] | Because, you know, they don't have any kids of their own.. |
| [13:39.75] | and this door was like a child to them. |
| [13:44.25] | Well, I'm gonna have to put on a new lock. They'll find out anyway. |
| [13:49.02] | It's looking like an all-day job. I'm gonna have to cancel my yoga class. |
| [13:54.36] | Hey, Ross. Could you tell Jasmine I can't make it to yoga class today? |
| [13:57.87] | Sure. |
| [14:04.54] | -Oh, my God! What happened to the door? -So it's noticeable, huh? - |
| [14:09.08] | -Look, is Rachel here? I need to talk to her. -Didn't you two already talk? - |
| [14:12.85] | Yeah, but.. |
| [14:15.42] | Okay. Look, you guys know that Rachel and I slept together.. |
| [14:19.02] | but there's something else. |
| [14:23.09] | Rachel's pregnant. |
| [14:24.66] | -Holy mother of God! -Oh, my God, I can't believe that! - |
| [14:30.63] | -With my child. -That is brand-new information! - |
| [14:39.61] | -You already know, don't you? -Little bit. - |
| [14:43.48] | -How you doing? -Okay. I mean, I'll be okay. - |
| [14:47.45] | It's just, I don't think I handled it very well. |
| [14:50.12] | -What'd you say to her? -Nothing. - |
| [14:52.62] | But the complaint department at the condom company got an earful. |
| [14:57.42] | -Then when I turned around, she was gone. -Oh, Ross. - |
| [15:00.46] | I know. But in my defense, I just found out that condoms are only, like,97% effective. |
| [15:06.47] | -What? -I gotta go find her. - |
| [15:09.40] | Hey. Hold on! Are you serious? |
| [15:12.51] | So, like,3 percent of the time, they don't even work? |
| [15:17.14] | They should put that on the box! |
| [15:20.98] | -Evidently, they do. -What?! - |
| [15:29.52] | Well, I'll be. |
| [15:39.20] | -I can't believe we're here. -You've gotta be kidding. - |
| [15:42.87] | What? |
| [15:46.31] | As a wedding gift to you, the hotel would like to give you the honeymoon suite. |
| [15:50.44] | No! You have been screwing us all day! |
| [15:54.18] | -Who are you? -We're you. Just 10 seconds later! - |
| [15:59.85] | You already got the first-class tickets, the lounge. We should get free stuff too! |
| [16:03.99] | You're not the only ones on your honeymoon! |
| [16:08.16] | You can have the suite if you want. We don't care about where we stay. |
| [16:12.73] | We're here to celebrate our love for each other. |
| [16:15.30] | We don't have to get free stuff. We just want to be together. |
| [16:22.28] | We need the stuff. |
| [16:27.05] | Monica, it's Joey. Phoebe and I smell gas coming from your apartment. |
| [16:31.22] | -What? Are you serious? Joey smells gas. -What else is new? - |
| [16:36.36] | -We'd check it out, but you took our keys. -Well, do something. Get in there! - |
| [16:41.50] | -How? I guess I could break down your door. -Yeah, do that. - |
| [16:46.13] | -And you won't blame us for any damage? -No. - |
| [16:51.34] | -Are you doing it? I don't hear anything. -Okay, I'll break it down. - |
| [16:59.91] | Hi. He's doing it, he's breaking down the door. |
| [17:07.35] | Okay, we're in. |
| [17:13.13] | -Okay, Rachel, are you comfortable? -If I said I was, would you judge me? - |
| [17:18.43] | The doctor'll be here in a minute to do your sonogram. |
| [17:21.07] | Okay. |
| [17:25.77] | Oh, man, I swear, if they sold these at Pottery Barn.. |
| [17:32.51] | -Hi. -Hi. |
| [17:34.35] | We need to talk. |
| [17:36.05] | Right now? Because I kind of got an alfresco situation going on over here. |
| [17:41.36] | Please, I really.. I want to apologize for the way I acted earlier today. |
| [17:45.69] | -That's fine. Can you stay up near my head? -What? Oh, yeah, sorry. - |
| [17:49.70] | I went crazy. I was thinking about myself when I should've been thinking about you.. |
| [17:55.57] | -Okay, head, Ross! Head, Ross! -Right. - |
| [17:58.01] | I want you to know that I'm gonna be there through this whole thing. Okay? |
| [18:02.74] | The doctor's appointments, the Lamaze classes, baby-proofing the apartment. |
| [18:08.08] | Although, we can worry about that after we get married. |
| [18:10.98] | -Married? -Well, yeah, I think we should get married. - |
| [18:13.69] | Because that's your answer to everything? |
| [18:18.79] | No. Because that's the right thing to do. |
| [18:21.83] | Yeah, maybe, if you're in love. But Ross, we are not in love, are we? |
| [18:27.60] | No. But still, I mean, you can't possibly do this alone. |
| [18:33.64] | Excuse me? |
| [18:35.14] | -You can't even eat alone in a restaurant. -What? - |
| [18:40.85] | If you can't eat by yourself, how do you expect to have a baby by yourself? |
| [18:44.92] | -I can too eat by myself! -When have you ever? - |
| [18:48.69] | When certain people leave the table and I am not finished! |
| [18:53.53] | Well, certain other people take two hours to eat a bowl of soup! |
| [18:57.20] | Oh, please. You inhale your food. |
| [18:59.63] | I grew up with Monica. If you didn't eat fast, you didn't eat! |
| [19:07.07] | Am I interrupting? |
| [19:08.54] | No, Dr. Long. Please come in. This is Ross. He is the father. |
| [19:12.38] | But not the husband, because, evidently, she can do this alone. |
| [19:16.35] | Nice to meet you. I'll get started on this. |
| [19:22.49] | -Why you can't admit you need me? -I need you to stay near my head! - |
| [19:29.10] | Okay. Everything looks good. Here it is on the screen. |
| [19:34.80] | Here's your uterus.. |
| [19:37.64] | and right here is your baby. |
| [19:43.28] | Oh, my God. |
| [19:49.35] | There it is. I see it. |
| [19:51.92] | Congratulations. I'll give you two a minute. |
| [19:55.52] | -Okay. -Thank you. |
| [20:05.23] | Pretty amazing, huh? |
| [20:07.80] | I don't see it! |
| [20:18.18] | -What? -I can't see it. - |
| [20:22.65] | But you just said that you did. |
| [20:24.85] | I know. I lied. I didn't want her to think I was a terrible mother. |
| [20:28.59] | I can't even see my own baby! |
| [20:30.56] | Oh, sure. Come here. Sure, you can. Come here. Look, it's right there. |
| [20:42.14] | Oh, it's beautiful. |
| [20:45.31] | I see it now. |
| [20:48.91] | -Do you really? -No, I don't see it! |
| [20:52.18] | Okay. Come on. All right. Okay. |
| [20:55.38] | You see this tiny thing that looks like a peanut? |
| [21:01.39] | Yeah. |
| [21:03.52] | Sweetie, that's it. |
| [21:05.86] | That's it? |
| [21:08.10] | Well, I saw that. |
| [21:16.30] | -Thank you. -You're welcome. - |
| [21:22.11] | Wow, I can't believe that's our baby. |
| [21:29.18] | Yeah, that's our baby. |
| [21:39.93] | Well, they put up the new door. |
| [21:41.80] | -So it's all locked up and secure? -Yeah. Why? |
| [21:45.17] | I was trying to figure out how bad I want one of Monica's turkey pot pies. |
| [21:50.67] | -Hi. -Hey. |
| [21:52.94] | -So how was the doctor? -Everything went great. - |
| [21:56.34] | -Good. -Hey, show them the picture of your uterus. - |
| [22:05.89] | I don't see the baby. Where is it? |
| [22:07.85] | Oh, no, I know. I couldn't see it either at first. But it's right.. |
| [22:13.23] | Ross, I lost it again. |
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