| [00:00.00] | Hello, Mega Man. und Mrs. Mega Man. |
| [00:03.29] | Welcome to couples' therapy. I'm Dr. Wily. |
| [00:05.54] | Dr. Wily? You're a therapist now? |
| [00:08.16] | But you're evil, and bent on world domination! |
| [00:09.88] | Not anymore. Those days are behind me. |
| [00:12.30] | Don't question it! Shut up. Just tell me the problem over this hot beat. |
| [00:15.94] | Okay... |
| [00:16.48] | Well you see, Doc, I got a pretty nice life |
| [00:18.52] | A Mega House with two kids, and a hot Mega Wife |
| [00:20.55] | But I got a little problem with my android bride |
| [00:22.74] | When it comes to making love, she's never satisfied |
| [00:24.88] | We've been fucking for decades! Sex has gotten routine! |
| [00:26.85] | We gotta spice that shit up, I'm not a total machine! |
| [00:28.88] | I'm sick of all the romance, and the cuddles, and the love |
| [00:31.14] | It's time to get dirty and do all the weird stuff! |
| [00:32.90] | It would be seeming to me that the problem here |
| [00:36.83] | Is you don't listen to your wife, she is being clear |
| [00:41.08] | But she says the same thing, like a tape recorder! |
| [00:43.23] | Quiet! The doctor is talking -- there must be order! |
| [00:45.92] | ...Sorry, I'm not evil anymore. |
| [00:49.53] | You must beat the Robot Masters to acquire skills |
| [00:53.50] | And then use them on your wife when she is getting drilled |
| [00:58.00] | Maybe she likes shocks from Elec Man's beam |
| [01:01.93] | Or getting burnt by fireballs; she's a freaky man's dream |
| [01:06.39] | Is that what you want, hon? A Robot Master? |
| [01:08.56] | Get out and do it, you stupid bastard! |
| [01:10.75] | Your marriage will be healthy like pure spring water |
| [01:12.86] | Now leave my office before you are slaughtered! |
| [01:14.91] | Fine, I'll kick ass if it saves my marriage |
| [01:16.90] | For the satisfaction of my lady's undercarriage |
| [01:19.03] | First I'll take on Fire Man, not much of a test |
| [01:20.82] | Oh, your weakness is ice? I woulda never fucking guessed. |
| [01:23.11] | Now Ice Man is here, this shouldn't take up too much time |
| [01:25.18] | Oh, is your weakness fire? You just blew my fucking mind. |
| [01:27.39] | I cut Cut Man and he's gonna need stitches |
| [01:29.53] | Bomb and Elec Man just went down like little bitches |
| [01:31.61] | Wait, you douchebag, I'm gonna end your life |
| [01:35.52] | I am Mega Man Zero, and I'm here to plow your wife |
| [01:39.63] | I bring sex moves from the future, and my skills are vast |
| [01:43.67] | Like my super double ultra mega nutbuster cumblast (Oh!) |
| [01:48.41] | Women can't resist my blonde flowing locks |
| [01:51.89] | I'll slap a stamp right on my package and deliver your wife the cock |
| [01:56.17] | My shining armor is red, the color of victory |
| [02:00.49] | While your fruity suit is blue, like your balls will soon be |
| [02:05.63] | Wait! What are you doing...? |
| [02:08.58] | Mega Dick... activate! |
| [02:13.17] | So Mega Man harnessed all the powers of the Masters |
| [02:15.58] | And killed Zero with his mega laser schlong-blaster |
| [02:17.64] | And then he banged his wife until she screamed "Yes! More!" |
| [02:19.72] | Then she loved him again, 'cause she's a shallow whore |
| [02:23.05] | Sorry, that was misogynistic. |
| [02:26.05] | She is a whore, though. |
| [02:27.17] | What did you say?! |
| [02:28.37] | Nothing! |
| [02:29.90] | ...Douche. |
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