| 明朝永乐年间，北京前门大街五牌楼石柱子上头，贴着一张皇榜。皇榜这么一贴，惊动了全城的老百姓。尤其是前三门外人烟稠密，商贾云集。皇榜往外一贴，惊动了大街上过路的人，也有僧道二门，回汉二教，诸子百家，士农工商，五行八作，一百两十行，也有做官的、为宦的，背弓的、挂箭的，推车的，担担的，卖煤的、卖炭的，卖针卖钱的，卖饼卖面的，锔锅卖蒜的，卖烧饼油条的，卖茶叶鸡蛋的……这些人哪，大家不知道国家出了什么事情，为什么要贴皇榜，都争先恐后围着看。 | |
| 就在这个时候，由北边来了一个人，这个人姓孙叫孙德龙，他是东四牌楼猪市大街卖肉的，也会捆猪宰猪，是山东登州府的人，四十多岁儿，好喝酒。这天刚打肉市上回来，胳肢窝夹着个搭猪的钩竿子，这是白蜡竿子，有核桃粗细，五尺多长，头里有两个铜钩子，猪要是跑了，离它五尺一搭就搭回来。这手提溜个钱口袋，这胳肢窝还夹着帐本，腰里系着根绳子，绳子上挂着一把锡鑞的酒壶，擦得是锃光瓦亮，穿着个布棉袍，可已经变成缎子的了。怎么回事哪？因为他切完肉也往上抹，切完油也往上沫，日子一长，就跟现在理发馆那钢刀布一个模样了。 | |
| 这天下了市，刚打酒铺喝完酒出来，喝得酩酊大醉，走道儿脚底下直拌蒜，嘴里说话也不利落了（学山东口音）：“这个酒哇是高梁水，醉人先醉腿，眼睛看不见道，简直是活见鬼！”走到皇榜头里一看，围着一圈子人：“咱借借光！”他挤进去了，到里边一瞧是傍，他不认识字，他要问问，扒拉那位：“哎！这怎么回事？”这位说：“你慢着点，欠点岔了气，这是皇榜。”“什么叫皇榜啊？”“皇上家贴的！”“您念念我听听行吗？”“可以，你听着啊。‘奉天承运皇帝诏曰：因成化七年有琉球国前来进贡，明为进贡，实为那邦派了个老道义真人，前来斗法……’”“行了！行了！你别往下念了，你念了半天我一句都不懂啊？”“我白念了。”“我先问问你头两句是什么？”“‘奉天承运皇帝诏曰’。”“怎么叫‘皇帝诏曰’？”皇上说话就是‘皇帝诏曰’。”“那我要是说话呢？”“那……不知道什么曰了。”“好，你往下念吧。”这位想：我别念了，念完了再讲受不了。干脆我告诉他这意思得了：“琉球国年年进贡岁岁称臣，今年派了个老道来，他会打三十六手哑谜，会念七十部《金刚经》，找咱们中国人斗法。如果赢了他，他们才能年年进贡，岁岁称臣，赢不了，或者没人跟他斗法，那就他们琉球为上邦，我们大明为属国。现在皇上贴皇榜选能人，如果有人会打哑谜会念《金刚经》，来跟老道斗法，赢了老道的话，要多少钱给多少钱，要多大官封多大官，你问这个也没用啊，你不会打哑谜，你又不会念《金刚经》。” | |
| 这句话行了，孙德龙有个外号叫万事通，什么事你要是说他不行，当时就急：“你别说了！你怎么知道我不会打哑谜？你怎么知道我不会念《金刚经》？”“噢！您会啊？”“我不会我能长个脑袋吗？”“哎呀！你会那更好了，您赶快揭皇榜找老道斗法去。”山东儿刚要过去揭，那位想：先别忙，我得给您念清楚喽！“皇榜上写着老道会打三十六手哑谜，您会那么些个吗？”“他会多少？”“三十六手。”“咱会七十二手。”“嚯！比他会的多一倍。——老道会念七十部《金刚经》。”“我那个《金刚经》念起来没完。”“那您就揭皇榜吧。”“我够不着。”“您手里拿的是什么呀？”“搭猪的钩竿子。”“您不会用它钩吗？”“对！”嘶！他给钩了。看榜兵丁一看醉汉撕了皇榜，摩肩头拢二臂绑上啦，推着他去见榜官。 | |
| 榜官是解学士大人，山东儿到这儿立而不跪，冲解大人一撇嘴，一抬下巴颏：“我说你姓什么？”解大人一听要过我一堂是怎么着？“我姓解。”“解大人，你讲理不讲理？”“怎么回事？”“找老道斗法，难道说就捆着去吗？”“哎呦！你是法官哪。”赶紧就埋怨看榜的兵丁：“你们这些东西真可恨，怎么把法官捆来了。”赶紧过去亲自松绑。屋里头就一个座：“法官请坐吧。”应该是帅不离位呀，孙德龙也不懂，一屁股就坐下啦；坐下不算，他这句话可气：“哎！你坐在哪儿呀！”解大人说：“那我就站着吧。”“我说老大人啊！这老道咱上哪儿找他去？”“他在江米巷金台馆驿。走吧，你先跟我见驾去吧。”“见哪个驾呀？”“见皇上去啊。”“那太好了，我们哥儿俩有日子没见了。”跟皇上哥儿俩！“法官咱们进宫您是骑马啊，是坐轿啊？”“全不用。”“全不用，用什么法术？”“骑驴。”“骑驴哪儿给您找去呀？”“没驴我不去了。”解大人没法子，打彰仪门雇匹小驴到了宫里头，让山东儿到东朝房。 | |
| 解大人去交旨，皇上十分喜悦，吩咐即刻召见。解大人一想：不能让他见驾——也没到礼部演礼，嘴里头不定说出什么来，回头见皇上一作揖：“咱哥俩老没见了！”我这纱帽也就丢了，赶紧就说：“万岁！法官是外省人，才来京城不久，又没到礼部演礼，恐冒犯天颜有失仪之罪，依臣之见，找来老道先斗法，斗法之后再见也不为晚。若赢了老道，见驾时倘有失仪之罪，我皇万岁也能谅情一二。” | |
| 当时就派人从金台馆驿把老道找来，告诉说我国有人跟你斗法。老道出主意，就在太和殿前高搭两座法台，都要三丈多高，上头预备八仙桌子一张，太师椅子一把，香炉、五供、蜡扦、黄毛边纸、朱砂笔、香菜、五谷杂粮、一碗无根水。“你家法官需用何物你问他。”解大人一琢磨，干脆也给他预备这么一份得了。人多好做活，当时法台搭好，东西也预备齐了，老道一抖袍袖，有一股黑旋风就给他托上去了，文武百官目瞪口呆。 | |
| 皇上传旨：“叫解大人请咱们的法官跟老道斗法，也让咱们法官驾风或者驾云上法台。”解大人赶紧跑到东朝房去找法官，进屋里一瞧哇，法官躺在地下睡着了。解大人赶紧过去叫：“法官！起来！”“别闹！”“谁跟你闹了！把他挽起来。”孙掌柜揉了揉眼睛，往四处一看，这是皇宫里头，金碧光辉，富丽堂皇。“哎！老大人！这是哪个场儿？”“皇宫内院。”“我上这个地方干什么来了？”“啊！你忘了，你不是找老道斗法来了吗？现在老道在法台上等着你呢。皇上宝座升到殿外，要看你二人如何斗法。”孙掌柜一听可吓坏了：“怎么回事啊？”刚才他揭皇榜的时候酒喝得十成醉，在地下睡了半天觉，把酒气给冰下去了。刚才揭皇榜那碴儿全忘了。现在听解大人这么一说，自己一想，我喝酒喝得太多了。酒后闹事揭了皇榜，我是个买卖人，卖猪肉的，哪儿会跟老道斗法呀！再说这老道是打外国来的，来者不善，善者不来。我这不是捅娄子吗？想到这儿，左右开弓，啪啪啪！自己打了四个嘴巴：“我糊涂，我糊涂！”往后一退步，咕咚跪下了：“老大人哪，我喝多了，我撕皇榜是耍疯儿，我是个买卖人，就懂得卖猪肉。斗法这个事儿干脆你找别人儿去吧！这个事儿，我是办不了啊。你若不出气的话，你给我俩嘴巴，你拿我当个风筝——把我放了吧！”“啊？”解大人一听这个气呀，气得浑身乱抖，纱帽翅乱动。是连生气带害怕，赶紧就说：“噢，你喝多了？你这个酒喝得可太凶了！你摸摸你还有脑袋没有？我给你俩嘴巴把你放了就完啦？你跟我这么说行了，我跟皇上要是这么说，是欺君误国，欺君事小，误国事大。现在老道已经来了，皇上拿什么话来回答他呀？这么大国家让你给失信，咱两人全活不了，你是酗酒闹事撕皇榜，戏耍看榜钦差大臣，我是办事不力，错引匪类入宫，欺君误国。说咱两个人的死罪有应得，祸由自取，皇上跟着丢人，偌大中国失去天威，琉球为上邦，我大明为属国，咱们就全成了亡国奴隶了。”孙德龙跪着这么一听，他可急了。“嗐！”啪！他一拍心口，刚才喝的那点酒又都撞上来了，跪着好好的，噌楞他蹦起来了：“老大人呀！不要紧！照你这一说咱俩不就没命了吗？没命就好办了，我不找老道斗法不是也活不了吗？这叫宁死阵前不死阵后，脑袋掉了不是才碗大的疤瘌吗？别看跟老道斗法不行，打架他还不准是个儿哪！走！咱找他去。”解大人一听：“你到底会不会呀？”“嗐！你就走吧！” | |
| 解大人也没办法了，只好把他领到法台下边，用手一指东边的这座法台：“你看！老道已经在上边打上座了。”孙德龙一瞧：“老大人，他上那边，我就上这边儿了，我们俩要是上一边，那为争地盘儿不就打起来了吗？”“快上吧！”“这法台有多高？”“三丈三！”“三丈三哪？九丈九也不要紧哪。来人！”“干吗呀？”“搬梯子。”“搬梯子可不行，皇上已经传过旨了，或是驾风或是驾云，因为老道是驾风上去的。”这其实呀，老道也不是驾风。——那么刚才你说的不是一抖袍袖有股黑旋风，裹着老道上去的吗？——刚是个戏法儿，在他袖口儿里边有个铁筒儿，铁筒里头，装的是狼粪、炭饼、大青，把它点着了。用的时候，他一抖袍袖，就把那盖儿打开了，你想他穿的是道袍，大领儿，这些个黑烟顺脖子、大襟、底襟全冒出来了，狼粪点着了不散，大青这味药点着了净冒黑烟，好像黑旋风裹着他一样。其实呀，手上脚上都有小钩子。他是从法台的杉槁爬上去的。孙德龙一听要驾风驾云，就问解大人：“老大人，我驾什么风呀？”“趁脚风呗。”“我会抽羊角疯。”“那没用。”“嗐，干脆，没梯子我不去了。”“哎，别价啊。”孙德龙着急就要往法台前边转。“别往前边去，皇上在前边哪。”“我瞅瞅。”解大人一听，有瞅皇上的吗？“坐那儿那个人儿是谁呀？”“那就是皇上啊。”“旁边那站着八个个高个儿，是干什么的？”“那是保驾的，金瓜武士。”“他手里举着的那是什么？”“那是金瓜。”“你把那头一个顶高个儿的叫过来我有事儿。”解大人过去一瞧，这位是太和殿头等侍卫白文元白老爷。“白老爷，过来我给您引见个朋友。这位是来斗法的孙法官。这位就是太和殿头等侍卫白文元白老爷。”“哦，白大人，你好啊，请你帮帮忙吧。”“什么事哪？”“我上法台。”“与我有什么关系呀？”“没你我上不去呀。 | |
| ”“怎么哪？”“你想啊，这法台三丈三，你多高身量？”“我呀？皇上选最高个儿的，身高九尺。”“你手里举着这个金瓜多长？”“一丈四的瓜把儿，一尺的瓜头，一共一丈五。”“啊，对呀！一丈五，身高九尺就是二丈四，胳膊伸长了二尺，两丈六、三丈三——差不离儿了。”白大人一听：他这儿算什么哪？“啊，你把这瓜放平喽，你两手攥住瓜把儿，我坐在瓜头上你不就把我扔上去吗？”“这……没听说过。”“你若不扔我可走啦！”解大人赶紧跑过来说：“白老爷，您受累帮帮忙，试试看吧。”白文元气得直抖手。这叫什么事啊！也没办法，只好试试看，就把金瓜放平喽，两手抓住瓜把儿，说：“来吧”！孙德龙坐到瓜头上，白老爷说：“您提着点气别往下坠着。”白老爷运足了气力：“我可要扔了啊！啊嘿！这一下子真不含糊，法台三丈三扔上有四丈四去。过了法台还一丈多哪，就这一丈多高呀，法台都是二寸多厚的板子，就算摔不死他也得摔个半死。该着这个老道倒霉，孙德龙没摔着，不但没摔着，并且还站到法台上去了，那位说，你说的这个不合理，他扔上去往下落，怎么也得腰朝下，那就是躺到那了，怎么能站着呢？这里头有个原因：他胳肢窝夹着一个搭猪的钩竿子，有五尺多长，您想啊，他过了法合一丈一，从这一丈一往台上落的时候，落下五尺多，钩竿子把儿就戳到台板上了。胳肢窝夹着钩竿子往下一出溜，脚就踩着台板了。手一拧钩竿子，嗨！他站住了。 | |
| 这个老道啊，正在对面法台上闭目合眼打坐养神，孙德龙怎么来的，怎么坐着金瓜往上扔，他全不知道，因为他是闭目养神哪，他睁眼这个时候，是倒霉催的，正是孙德龙由一丈一往下落的时候，老道一看就害怕了：“哎呀，了不得，中国真有高人。贫道驾着风上法台，怎么中国的法官会从天而降哪。”扔上来他没瞧见。老道再一看孙掌柜，他更害怕了：“这位法官脚驾样云，金光护体呀！”脚驾样云是孙掌柜把香炉扒拉到台上了，香灰这么一扑，跟云彩一样；那个金光护体呀，是孙掌柜那个油棉袍，太阳一照猪油放光。您说这老道不是倒霉催的吗。打仗是怯敌必败，他不但吓得直哆嗦，连肝儿都颤了，老道一想：“这可得多加留神。”越留神越坏，老道单手打稽首，口念：“无量佛！”别看他身量矮，声如铜钟。老道一念佛，孙掌柜一想我也得说一句呀：“啊，好家伙!”人家念无量佛，他念好家伙。老道又说了一句：“无量……寿佛。”孙掌柜一听加字儿了：“一大堆破烂家伙！” | |
| 老道一听：他这家伙还真不少，我没那么多家伙，干脆跟他打哑谜得了。冲孙掌柜伸出一个手指头去，这就是哑谜。老道的意思是：“你别瞧不起我，我有一佛顶礼。”孙掌柜不懂啊，他揭皇榜的时候不是说会打哑谜吗？可是他打那哑谜跟老道这个不一样啊。他是肉市上卖猪肉的。这个猪多大分量、多少钱、多少整儿、多少零儿，两个拉拉手儿，是这个哑谜。他一看老道伸了一个大拇指，：“这是干什么？开玩笑啊？占便宜比我大一辈儿？你看这个！”他伸出俩来，他是什么意思哪？“你比我大一辈儿啊？你问问去吧。我比你爸爸还大两辈儿哪！”好，前后大四辈儿。老道可害了怕啦！“哎呀！我伸一个是一佛顶礼，他伸俩，是二圣护身哪。”让他给蒙上来了。老道又伸了三个指头，那意思是说：“三皇治世”。孙德经这儿又琢磨了：“他这是以多为胜，他伸一个我伸俩，他伸仨我伸四个，他再来五个，我完啦，我没有六指儿，干脆我先来五个。”老道一看：“哎呀，对！‘三皇治世’正对‘五帝为君’哪。”全弄到两下去啦。老道一拍心口，他的意思是：“佛在我心头坐。”孙掌柜一瞧：“好小子，你还是玩笑，这是跟随我充太爷哪？”手拍脑袋一下，“啊嘿！”他那意思是说：“你充太爷呀，我打你个老丈人的。”老道一看：“哟，我‘佛在心头坐’，他‘头上有青天’哪。”满弄拧了！ | |
| 老道一看，打哑谜我赢不了他了。拿过一张黄毛边纸来。哧愣一下，把宝剑拉出来了。孙德龙一看：“干什么？要抹脖子呀？”老道把纸裁了三条儿，用朱砂笔刷刷画了三道符，火钱，火石打着了，把蜡点着了，用宝剑尖儿扎起一道符来，在蜡苗儿上一点，口中念念有词，一晃这宝剑，这团火越晃摇越大，要拿火烧孙德龙，孙掌柜还开玩笑哪：“嚯，玩儿上火啦，老道，那么大个子别玩儿火呀，玩儿火晚上睡觉尿炕，妈妈打屁股。”老道这个气呀，这团火光有茶杯粗细，晃来晃去有冰盘大小了，按理说这道符，就那么一个纸条儿，沾火就完了。为什么这火越晃越大呢？其实并不是念咒念的，画符的朱砂里头有药材。所以火越着越大。到了冰盘大小，这团火就甩过去了，直奔孙掌柜的面门，孙掌柜往旁边儿一斜一身，一歪脑袋：“好小子，烧人呀！”明朝人拢发包巾。这团火擦柜的耳根台了过去的，嗞啦一下，烧去了半边发髻。孙掌柜用手一胡噜，把手也烫了。桌上有一碗无根水，这碗凉水救了命啦！往脑袋上一浇，“哗！”火灭了。老道一看头道灵符没成功，再来一张，把第二道符点着，孙掌柜一瞧："好小子得理不让人啊，烧完这半拉再烧那半拉，一根头发没有了。你当老道，让我当和尚，咱俩一块化缘去。我不想出家呀，别容他再烧我了，我先给小子一钩竿子吧。”抄起钩竿子来，冲着老道面门瞄准儿。 | |
| 老道装模作样的闭着眼睛，摇晃脑袋，嘴里嘟嘟嚷嚷假装那儿念咒，他这一闭眼睛，孙掌柜得搂儿了。怎么？他好瞄准儿呀。拿着钩竿子来回悠达，悠达欢了，他说这叫竿儿朝前，钩在后，觑着目，往对过儿瞅，对准了前拳撒后手儿：“着家伙！”他要是不喊这句呀，正打到老道的面门上。他这一喊，老道睁眼一看，直戳戳一物，直奔面门而来：“无量佛！”往旁边一斜身儿，还算好，没打着。您可听明白喽，竿是没打着，后头这俩钩可不饶人啊，噗哧一下正钩到腮帮子上。往下一拨钩竿子，带下两条子肉来，疼得老道捂腮帮子直念佛！“无量受不了的佛！”孙德龙还跟着起哄哪：“不留神，挨家伙！”老道这个气呀，拿着钩竿子一看，他不知道干什么用的，心里更害怕了：“哎呀，我太不识时务了。刚才这位法官一来的时候，是脚驾祥云，金光护体，从天而降，这一定是十八罗汉金仙。现在一看果然是大罗金仙，如若不然怎么能把西天如来我佛的八宝如意紫金钩拿来。”其实是搭猪用的。 | |
| 孙掌柜可乐了！“小子，你把我头发烧掉了还能长啊，你这腮帮子破了，锔碗的不会补啊！”他心里一痛快，可高兴了。老道更害怕了，头道灵符我烧了他半边发髻，二道灵符未曾发用，他就打了我一八宝如意紫金钩。再一瞧孙掌柜那儿，提溜一个钱口袋，老道更嘀咕了：“他还带着百宝囊哪！”再一看，孙掌柜腰里头拴着酒壶：“好家伙！还挂着翻天印哪！”这不是倒霉催的吗，他瞧什么都有用啦！越琢磨越害怕，干脆三十六计——走为上策！“无量佛，贫道我要回国交旨。”“哎！你要是走我可祭法宝！”“别价！我去先见你家万岁爷。”说完这话一掸袍袖，冒出黑烟变了个戏法就下台了。走到太和殿上往那儿一跪，磕头就如捣蒜：“天邦大国万岁开恩，小国使臣请罪。”皇上哪儿看得明白呀！可是他们俩打的哑谜念的什么“无量佛”“好家伙”，这全不懂；又瞧老道拿火烧人，孙掌柜拿水把火烧灭了，皇上高兴了：“好！水能克火。”又看老道又点起火来了，心想讨厌的东西，你已经赢了何必赶尽杀绝。皇上净顾瞧这火了，没看见钩竿子怎么过去的，一瞧老道腮帮子流血了，皇上拍着巴掌直乐：“我国法官得胜了。好法宝！好法宝！”现在一看老道下来了，皇上明白，这是他输了，说：“真人，现在你还有什么话讲？”“啊呀！天邦大国万岁开恩。敝国认输，情愿年年进贡，岁岁来朝。”“嗯！我得问问你，你们俩见面，你说‘无量佛’这是怎么句话！”“这是我们出家人的见面礼儿。”“那么他说哪‘好家伙’哪！”“那我实在不懂，不知道什么叫好家伙。”“那么你说那‘无量寿佛’哪？”“这是问候。”“那我国法官说那句‘一大堆破烂家伙’哪？”“这是法官家伙太多。”一指腮帮子，“我这不是挨了一家伙吗！”后来你不说话，伸一个手指头是怎么回事？“是打哑谜，我说的是‘一佛顶礼’。”“我国法官伸俩呢？”“他说他有‘二圣护身’。”“你伸仨呢？”“‘三皇治世’，你家法官又伸五个，他说有‘五帝为君’；我一拍心口说，‘佛在我心头坐’，他一拍脑袋，说他‘头上有青天’。”嘿！全蒙对了！皇上说：“那么你那火是怎么回事情？”“我主开恩，我是想将贵国法官扔下法台。”“哼！出家人不讲慈悲。脸上是什么伤的？”“八宝如意紫金钩。”他就不知道是搭猪用的，跪在一旁听个候发落。 | |
| 持上往法台上一看，就跟解大人说：“咱们的法官怎么还不下台呀？”他也得下的来呀！孙掌柜在台上那能儿转磨：“哎！这是怎么回事，倒是输了赢了”？他还不知道哪。皇上一瞧，说：“想必我家法官被魔火烧伤，赶快派人把法官接下法台。”皇上这句话德行大了。刚才扔上去的，这要是往下跳非摔死不可。皇上一说把他接下来，有人立好了云梯，孙掌柜顺梯子就下来了。解大人过来说：“走，跟我见皇上去，要多磕头少说话。”怎么？怕他见皇上再来个“咱哥俩老没见了”。孙德龙到了太和殿头里，冲皇上作了个大揖：“嗬！”皇上一瞧，你要咬我是怎么着？“咱给老皇上磕头了。”他这一赢，皇上高兴：“法官抬起头来。”别人都得说“有罪不敢抬头”，“恕你无罪”，这才抬头。”孙掌柜满不懂，一抬头直眉瞪眼瞧着皇上：“干什么？”上人见喜，皇上乐了：“法官你斗法是输了是赢了？”孙掌柜就怕问这句，输赢连他自己也不知道，他低下头去装听不见。他这一低头，皇上又问：“你输了你赢了？”他往旁边一看，正瞧见老道。正赶上这时候皇上问这第三句：“法官！你跟老道斗法是输了是赢了？”“我说皇上，你老人家问我输了赢了，这个话我不好说呀！怎么呢？我要是说我赢了，那叫老王卖瓜自卖自夸；可我要是说我输了吧，我干什么来了？没有金刚钻就不敢揽瓷器。”解大人一听：你哪儿那么多俏皮话儿啊！“你老人家问我输了我赢了，你别问我。”一指老道，“你问他！他说我输了就算我输了，他说我赢了就算我赢了。老道！你要是说我输了咱俩上台再干。”老道一捂腮帮子：“干不了！他赢了。”“皇上听见了吧，我赢了！我赢了！”皇上说：“法官你叫什么名字？”“我姓孙叫孙德龙，住家在肉市，德龙馆那个小买卖是我开的，咱是准斤十六两绝不少给分量。”谁问这个了！“你们俩一见面，他说‘无量佛’是怎么回事？”“这‘无量佛’是怎么句话，皇上！ | |
| 这个老道我认的。”老道一听吓了一跳，他认得我，我怎不认得他呀？你哪儿认得去，他是卖猪肉的！“这个老道是化缘的。”“化缘干吗说‘无量佛’哪？”“我开肉馆子，他们化缘，和尚念‘弥陀佛’，老道念‘无量佛’，就是跟我要钱哪。”“那么你说那‘好家伙’哪？”“我说‘好家伙’，心里想，怎么刚走俩又来一个？”老道听着这通儿窝心哪。“那么你们俩人打哑谜，他伸一个手指头是怎么回事情？”“孙掌柜一想：这回可糟了，老道伸一个手指头是跟我开玩笑，他说是比我大一辈，我伸俩，我说比他爸爸大两辈，这话不能跟皇上说，回头这老道若有了罪，也许就灭门九族，他比我大一辈，我比他爸爸大两辈，怎么也没出九族啊，干脆我瞎编个词吧，这一编词把老道给送下来了：”皇上！他没跟打哑谜！”皇上说：“怎么？他伸一个你伸俩，他伸仨你伸五个，他一拍心口你一拍脑袋，这不是打哑谜哪吗？”“不！这是讲买卖哪！”“讲什么买卖啊？”“他知道我是肉市上卖猪肉的，他庙里头办喜事；他想买我一口猪。”我说，你别说买一个，你想买俩我都有哇，他说，要个三十来斤的，我想，我那儿顶少也有五十来斤的；他说可得带心、肝、肺；我说，甭说心肝肺，连猪头都归你呀！” |
| ming chao yong le nian jian, bei jing qian men da jie wu pai lou shi zhu zi shang tou, tie zhe yi zhang huang bang. huang bang zhe me yi tie, jing dong le quan cheng de lao bai xing. you qi shi qian san men wai ren yan chou mi, shang gu yun ji. huang bang wang wai yi tie, jing dong le da jie shang guo lu de ren, ye you seng dao er men, hui han er jiao, zhu zi bai jia, shi nong gong shang, wu hang ba zuo, yi bai liang shi hang, ye you zuo guan de wei huan de, bei gong de gua jian de, tui che de, dan dan de, mai mei de mai tan de, mai zhen mai qian de, mai bing mai mian di, ju guo mai suan de, mai shao bing you tiao de, mai cha ye ji dan de zhei xie ren na, da jia bu zhi dao guo jia chu le shen me shi qing, wei shi me yao tie huang bang, dou zheng xian kong hou wei zhe kan. | |
| jiu zai zhe ge shi hou, you bei bian lai le yi ge ren, zhe ge ren xing sun jiao sun de long, ta shi dong si pai lou zhu shi da jie mai rou de, ye hui kun zhu zai zhu, shi shan dong deng zhou fu de ren, si shi duo sui er, hao he jiu. zhe tian gang da rou shi shang hui lai, ge zhi wo jia zhe ge da zhu de gou gan zi, zhe shi bai la gan zi, you he tao cu xi, wu chi duo zhang, tou li you liang ge tong gou zi, zhu yao shi pao le, li ta wu chi yi da jiu da hui lai. zhe shou di liu ge qian kou dai, zhe ge zhi wo hai jia zhe zhang ben, yao li xi zhe gen sheng zi, sheng zi shang gua zhe yi ba xi la de jiu hu, ca de shi zeng guang wa liang, chuan zhe ge bu mian pao, ke yi jing bian cheng duan zi de le. zen me hui shi na? yin wei ta qie wan rou ye wang shang mo, qie wan you ye wang shang mo, ri zi yi chang, jiu gen xian zai li fa guan na gang dao bu yi ge mu yang le. | |
| zhe tian xia le shi, gang da jiu pu he wan jiu chu lai, he de ming ding da zui, zou dao er jiao di xia zhi ban suan, zui li shuo hua ye bu li luo le xue shan dong kou yin:" zhe ge jiu wa shi gao liang shui, zui ren xian zui tui, yan jing kan bu jian dao, jian zhi shi huo jian gui!" zou dao huang bang tou li yi kan, wei zhe yi quan zi ren:" zan jie jie guang!" ta ji jin qu le, dao li bian yi qiao shi bang, ta bu ren shi zi, ta yao wen wen, ba la na wei:" ai! zhe zen me hui shi?" zhe wei shuo:" ni man zhe dian, qian dian cha le qi, zhe shi huang bang."" shen me jiao huang bang a?"" huang shang jia tie de!"" nin nian nian wo ting ting xing ma?"" ke yi, ni ting zhe a.' feng tian cheng yun huang di zhao yue: yin cheng hua qi nian you liu qiu guo qian lai jin gong, ming wei jin gong, shi wei na bang pai le ge lao dao yi zhen ren, qian lai dou fa'"" xing le! xing le! ni bie wang xia nian le, ni nian le ban tian wo yi ju dou bu dong a?"" wo bai nian le."" wo xian wen wen ni tou liang ju shi shen me?""' feng tian cheng yun huang di zhao yue'."" zen me jiao' huang di zhao yue'?" huang shang shuo hua jiu shi' huang di zhao yue'."" na wo yao shi shuo hua ne?"" na bu zhi dao shen me yue le."" hao, ni wang xia nian ba." zhe wei xiang: wo bie nian le, nian wan le zai jiang shou bu liao. gan cui wo gao su ta zhe yi si de le:" liu qiu guo nian nian jin gong sui sui cheng chen, jin nian pai le ge lao dao lai, ta hui da san shi liu shou ya mi, hui nian qi shi bu jin gang jing, zhao zan men zhong guo ren dou fa. ru guo ying le ta, ta men cai neng nian nian jin gong, sui sui cheng chen, ying bu liao, huo zhe mei ren gen ta dou fa, na jiu ta men liu qiu wei shang bang, wo men da ming wei shu guo. xian zai huang shang tie huang bang xuan neng ren, ru guo you ren hui da ya mi hui nian jin gang jing, lai gen lao dao dou fa, ying le lao dao de hua, yao duo shao qian gei duo shao qian, yao duo da guan feng duo da guan, ni wen zhe ge ye mei yong a, ni bu hui da ya mi, ni you bu hui nian jin gang jing." | |
| zhe ju hua xing le, sun de long you ge wai hao jiao wan shi tong, shen me shi ni yao shi shuo ta bu xing, dang shi jiu ji:" ni bie shuo le! ni zen me zhi dao wo bu hui da ya mi? ni zen me zhi dao wo bu hui nian jin gang jing?"" o! nin hui a?"" wo bu hui wo neng zhang ge nao dai ma?"" ai ya! ni hui na geng hao le, nin gan kuai jie huang bang zhao lao dao dou fa qu." shan dong er gang yao guo qu jie, na wei xiang: xian bie mang, wo de gei nin nian qing chu lou!" huang bang shang xie zhe lao dao hui da san shi liu shou ya mi, nin hui na me xie ge ma?"" ta hui duo shao?"" san shi liu shou."" zan hui qi shi er shou."" huo! bi ta hui de duo yi bei. lao dao hui nian qi shi bu jin gang jing."" wo na ge jin gang jing nian qi lai mei wan."" na nin jiu jie huang bang ba."" wo gou bu zhao."" nin shou li na de shi shen me ya?"" da zhu de gou gan zi."" nin bu hui yong ta gou ma?"" dui!" si! ta gei gou le. kan bang bing ding yi kan zui han si le huang bang, mo jian tou long er bi bang shang la, tui zhe ta qu jian bang guan. | |
| bang guan shi jie xue shi da ren, shan dong er dao zhe er li er bu gui, chong jie da ren yi pie zui, yi tai xia ba ke:" wo shuo ni xing shen me?" jie da ren yi ting yao guo wo yi tang shi zen me zhao?" wo xing jie."" jie da ren, ni jiang li bu jiang li?"" zen me hui shi?"" zhao lao dao dou fa, nan dao shuo jiu kun zhe qu ma?"" ai you! ni shi fa guan na." gan jin jiu man yuan kan bang de bing ding:" ni men zhei xie dong xi zhen ke hen, zen me ba fa guan kun lai le." gan jin guo qu qin zi song bang. wu li tou jiu yi ge zuo:" fa guan qing zuo ba." ying gai shi shuai bu li wei ya, sun de long ye bu dong, yi pi gu jiu zuo xia la zuo xia bu suan, ta zhe ju hua ke qi:" ai! ni zuo zai na er ya!" jie da ren shuo:" na wo jiu zhan zhe ba."" wo shuo lao da ren a! zhe lao dao zan shang na er zhao ta qu?"" ta zai jiang mi xiang jin tai guan yi. zou ba, ni xian gen wo jian jia qu ba."" jian nei ge jia ya?"" jian huang shang qu a."" na tai hao le, wo men ge er lia you ri zi mei jian le." gen huang shang ge er lia!" fa guan zan men jin gong nin shi qi ma a, shi zuo jiao a?"" quan bu yong."" quan bu yong, yong shen me fa shu?"" qi lv."" qi lv na er gei nin zhao qu ya?"" mei lv wo bu qu le." jie da ren mei fa zi, da zhang yi men gu pi xiao lv dao le gong li tou, rang shan dong er dao dong chao fang. | |
| jie da ren qu jiao zhi, huang shang shi fen xi yue, fen fu ji ke zhao jian. jie da ren yi xiang: bu neng rang ta jian jia ye mei dao li bu yan li, zui li tou bu ding shuo chu shen me lai, hui tou jian huang shang yi zuo yi:" zan ge lia lao mei jian le!" wo zhe sha mao ye jiu diu le, gan jin jiu shuo:" wan sui! fa guan shi wai sheng ren, cai lai jing cheng bu jiu, you mei dao li bu yan li, kong mao fan tian yan you shi yi zhi zui, yi chen zhi jian, zhao lai lao dao xian dou fa, dou fa zhi hou zai jian ye bu wei wan. ruo ying le lao dao, jian jia shi tang you shi yi zhi zui, wo huang wan sui ye neng liang qing yi er." | |
| dang shi jiu pai ren cong jin tai guan yi ba lao dao zhao lai, gao su shuo wo guo you ren gen ni dou fa. lao dao chu zhu yi, jiu zai tai he dian qian gao da liang zuo fa tai, dou yao san zhang duo gao, shang tou yu bei ba xian zhuo zi yi zhang, tai shi yi zi yi ba, xiang lu wu gong la qian huang mao bian zhi zhu sha bi xiang cai wu gu za liang yi wan wu gen shui." ni jia fa guan xu yong he wu ni wen ta." jie da ren yi zuo mo, gan cui ye gei ta yu bei zhe me yi fen de le. ren duo hao zuo huo, dang shi fa tai da hao, dong xi ye yu bei qi le, lao dao yi dou pao xiu, you yi gu hei xuan feng jiu gei ta tuo shang qu le, wen wu bai guan mu deng kou dai. | |
| huang shang chuan zhi:" jiao jie da ren qing zan men de fa guan gen lao dao dou fa, ye rang zan men fa guan jia feng huo zhe jia yun shang fa tai." jie da ren gan jin pao dao dong chao fang qu zhao fa guan, jin wu li yi qiao wa, fa guan tang zai di xia shui zhao le. jie da ren gan jin guo qu jiao:" fa guan! qi lai!"" bie nao!"" shui gen ni nao le! ba ta wan qi lai." sun zhang gui rou le rou yan jing, wang si chu yi kan, zhe shi huang gong li tou, jin bi guang hui, fu li tang huang." ai! lao da ren! zhe shi nei ge chang r?"" huang gong nei yuan."" wo shang zhe ge di fang gan shen me lai le?"" a! ni wang le, ni bu shi zhao lao dao dou fa lai le ma? xian zai lao dao zai fa tai shang deng zhe ni ne. huang shang bao zuo sheng dao dian wai, yao kan ni er ren ru he dou fa." sun zhang gui yi ting ke xia huai le:" zen me hui shi a?" gang cai ta jie huang bang de shi hou jiu he de shi cheng zui, zai di xia shui le ban tian jue, ba jiu qi gei bing xia qu le. gang cai jie huang bang na cha er quan wang le. xian zai ting jie da ren zhe me yi shuo, zi ji yi xiang, wo he jiu he de tai duo le. jiu hou nao shi jie le huang bang, wo shi ge mai mai ren, mai zhu rou de, na er hui gen lao dao dou fa ya! zai shuo zhe lao dao shi da wai guo lai de, lai zhe bu shan, shan zhe bu lai. wo zhe bu shi tong lou zi ma? xiang dao zhe er, zuo you kai gong, pa pa pa! zi ji da le si ge zui ba:" wo hu tu, wo hu tu!" wang hou yi tui bu, gu dong gui xia le:" lao da ren na, wo he duo le, wo si huang bang shi shua feng er, wo shi ge mai mai ren, jiu dong de mai zhu rou. dou fa zhe ge shi er gan cui ni zhao bie ren er qu ba! zhe ge shi er, wo shi ban bu liao a. ni ruo bu chu qi de hua, ni gei wo lia zui ba, ni na wo dang ge feng zheng ba wo fang le ba!"" a?" jie da ren yi ting zhe ge qi ya, qi de hun shen luan dou, sha mao chi luan dong. shi lian sheng qi dai hai pa, gan jin jiu shuo:" o, ni he duo le? ni zhe ge jiu he de ke tai xiong le! ni mo mo ni hai you nao dai mei you? wo gei ni lia zui ba ba ni fang le jiu wan la? ni gen wo zhe me shuo xing le, wo gen huang shang yao shi zhe me shuo, shi qi jun wu guo, qi jun shi xiao, wu guo shi da. xian zai lao dao yi jing lai le, huang shang na shen me hua lai hui da ta ya? zhe me da guo jia rang ni gei shi xin, zan liang ren quan huo bu liao, ni shi xu jiu nao shi si huang bang, xi shua kan bang qin chai da chen, wo shi ban shi bu li, cuo yin fei lei ru gong, qi jun wu guo. shuo zan liang ge ren de si zui you ying de, huo you zi qu, huang shang gen zhe diu ren, ruo da zhong guo shi qu tian wei, liu qiu wei shang bang, wo da ming wei shu guo, zan men jiu quan cheng le wang guo nu li le." sun de long gui zhe zhe me yi ting, ta ke ji le." hai!" pa! ta yi pai xin kou, gang cai he de na dian jiu you dou zhuang shang lai le, gui zhe hao hao de, ceng leng ta beng qi lai le:" lao da ren ya! bu yao jin! zhao ni zhe yi shuo zan lia bu jiu mei ming le ma? mei ming jiu hao ban le, wo bu zhao lao dao dou fa bu shi ye huo bu liao ma? zhe jiao ning si zhen qian bu si zhen hou, nao dai diao liao bu shi cai wan da de ba la ma? bie kan gen lao dao dou fa bu xing, da jia ta hai bu zhun shi ge er na! zou! zan zhao ta qu." jie da ren yi ting:" ni dao di hui bu hui ya?"" hai! ni jiu zou ba!" | |
| jie da ren ye mei ban fa le, zhi hao ba ta ling dao fa tai xia bian, yong shou yi zhi dong bian de zhe zuo fa tai:" ni kan! lao dao yi jing zai shang bian da shang zuo le." sun de long yi qiao:" lao da ren, ta shang na bian, wo jiu shang zhe bian r le, wo men lia yao shi shang yi bian, na wei zheng di pan er bu jiu da qi lai le ma?"" kuai shang ba!"" zhe fa tai you duo gao?"" san zhang san!"" san zhang san na? jiu zhang jiu ye bu yao jin na. lai ren!"" gan ma ya?"" ban ti zi."" ban ti zi ke bu xing, huang shang yi jing zhuan guo zhi le, huo shi jia feng huo shi jia yun, yin wei lao dao shi jia feng shang qu de." zhe qi shi ya, lao dao ye bu shi jia feng. na me gang cai ni shuo de bu shi yi dou pao xiu you gu hei xuan feng, guo zhe lao dao shang qu de ma? gang shi ge xi fa er, zai ta xiu kou er li bian you ge tie tong er, tie tong li tou, zhuang de shi lang fen tan bing da qing, ba ta dian zhao le. yong de shi hou, ta yi dou pao xiu, jiu ba na gai r da kai le, ni xiang ta chuan de shi dao pao, da ling er, zhei xie ge hei yan shun bo zi da jin di jin quan mao chu lai le, lang fen dian zhao liao bu san, da qing zhe wei yao dian zhao le jing mao hei yan, hao xiang hei xuan feng guo zhe ta yi yang. qi shi ya, shou shang jiao shang dou you xiao gou zi. ta shi cong fa tai de shan gao pa shang qu de. sun de long yi ting yao jia feng jia yun, jiu wen jie da ren:" lao da ren, wo jia shen me feng ya?"" chen jiao feng bei."" wo hui chou yang jiao feng."" na mei yong."" hai, gan cui, mei ti zi wo bu qu le."" ai, bie jia a." sun de long zhao ji jiu yao wang fa tai qian bian zhuan." bie wang qian bian qu, huang shang zai qian bian na."" wo chou chou." jie da ren yi ting, you chou huang shang de ma?" zuo na er na ge ren er shi shui ya?"" na jiu shi huang shang a."" pang bian na zhan zhe ba ge ge gao ge er, shi gan shen me de?"" na shi bao jia de, jin gua wu shi."" ta shou li ju zhe de na shi shen me?"" na shi jin gua."" ni ba na tou yi ge ding gao ge er de jiao guo lai wo you shi er." jie da ren guo qu yi qiao, zhe wei shi tai he dian tou deng shi wei bai wen yuan bai lao ye." bai lao ye, guo lai wo gei nin yin jian ge peng you. zhe wei shi lai dou fa de sun fa guan. zhe wei jiu shi tai he dian tou deng shi wei bai wen yuan bai lao ye."" o, bai da ren, ni hao a, qing ni bang bang mang ba."" shen me shi na?"" wo shang fa tai."" yu wo you shen me guan xi ya?"" mei ni wo shang bu qu ya. | |
| "" zen me na?"" ni xiang a, zhe fa tai san zhang san, ni duo gao shen liang?"" wo ya? huang shang xuan zui gao ge er de, shen gao jiu chi."" ni shou li ju zhe zhe ge jin gua duo zhang?"" yi zhang si de gua ba er, yi chi de gua tou, yi gong yi zhang wu."" a, dui ya! yi zhang wu, shen gao jiu chi jiu shi er zhang si, ge bo shen chang le er chi, liang zhang liu san zhang san cha bu li r le." bai da ren yi ting: ta zhe er suan shen me na?" a, ni ba zhe gua fang ping lou, ni liang shou zuan zhu gua ba er, wo zuo zai gua tou shang ni bu jiu ba wo reng shang qu ma?"" zhe mei ting shuo guo."" ni ruo bu reng wo ke zou la!" jie da ren gan jin pao guo lai shuo:" bai lao ye, nin shou lei bang bang mang, shi shi kan ba." bai wen yuan qi de zhi dou shou. zhe jiao shen me shi a! ye mei ban fa, zhi hao shi shi kan, jiu ba jin gua fang ping lou, liang shou zhua zhu gua ba er, shuo:" lai ba"! sun de long zuo dao gua tou shang, bai lao ye shuo:" nin ti zhe dian qi bie wang xia zhui zhe." bai lao ye yun zu le qi li:" wo ke yao reng le a! a hei! zhe yi xia zi zhen bu han hu, fa tai san zhang san reng shang you si zhang si qu. guo le fa tai hai yi zhang duo na, jiu zhe yi zhang duo gao ya, fa tai dou shi er cun duo hou de ban zi, jiu suan shuai bu si ta ye de shuai ge ban si. gai zhao zhe ge lao dao dao mei, sun de long mei shuai zhe, bu dan mei shuai zhe, bing qie hai zhan dao fa tai shang qu le, na wei shuo, ni shuo de zhe ge bu he li, ta reng shang qu wang xia luo, zen me ye de yao chao xia, na jiu shi tang dao na le, zen me neng zhan zhe ne? zhe li tou you ge yuan yin: ta ge zhi wo jia zhe yi ge da zhu de gou gan zi, you wu chi duo zhang, nin xiang a, ta guo le fa he yi zhang yi, cong zhe yi zhang yi wang tai shang luo de shi hou, la xia wu chi duo, gou gan zi ba er jiu chuo dao tai ban shang le. ge zhi wo jia zhe gou gan zi wang xia yi chu liu, jiao jiu cai zhe tai ban le. shou yi ning gou gan zi, hai! ta zhan zhu le. | |
| zhe ge lao dao a, zheng zai dui mian fa tai shang bi mu he yan da zuo yang shen, sun de long zen me lai de, zen me zuo zhe jin gua wang shang reng, ta quan bu zhi dao, yin wei ta shi bi mu yang shen na, ta zheng yan zhe ge shi hou, shi dao mei cui de, zheng shi sun de long you yi zhang yi wang xia luo de shi hou, lao dao yi kan jiu hai pa le:" ai ya, liao bu de, zhong guo zhen you gao ren. pin dao jia zhe feng shang fa tai, zen me zhong guo de fa guan hui cong tian er jiang na." reng shang lai ta mei qiao jian. lao dao zai yi kan sun zhang gui, ta geng hai pa le:" zhe wei fa guan jiao jia yang yun, jin guang hu ti ya!" jiao jia yang yun shi sun zhang gui ba xiang lu ba la dao tai shang le, xiang hui zhe me yi pu, gen yun cai yi yang na ge jin guang hu ti ya, shi sun zhang gui na ge you mian pao, tai yang yi zhao zhu you fang guang. nin shuo zhe lao dao bu shi dao mei cui de ma. da zhang shi qie di bi bai, ta bu dan xia de zhi duo suo, lian gan er dou chan le, lao dao yi xiang:" zhe ke de duo jia liu shen." yue liu shen yue huai, lao dao dan shou da qi shou, kou nian:" wu liang fu!" bie kan ta shen liang ai, sheng ru tong zhong. lao dao yi nian fo, sun zhang gui yi xiang wo ye de shuo yi ju ya:" a, hao jia huo!" ren jia nian wu liang fu, ta nian hao jia huo. lao dao you shuo le yi ju:" wu liang shou fu." sun zhang gui yi ting jia zi er le:" yi da dui po lan jia huo!" | |
| lao dao yi ting: ta zhe jia huo hai zhen bu shao, wo mei na me duo jia huo, gan cui gen ta da ya mi de le. chong sun zhang gui shen chu yi ge shou zhi tou qu, zhe jiu shi ya mi. lao dao de yi si shi:" ni bie qiao bu qi wo, wo you yi fu ding li." sun zhang gui bu dong a, ta jie huang bang de shi hou bu shi shuo hui da ya mi ma? ke shi ta da na ya mi gen lao dao zhe ge bu yi yang a. ta shi rou shi shang mai zhu rou de. zhe ge zhu duo da fen liang duo shao qian duo shao zheng er duo shao ling er, liang ge la la shou er, shi zhe ge ya mi. ta yi kan lao dao shen le yi ge da mu zhi,:" zhe shi gan shen me? kai wan xiao a? zhan pian yi bi wo da yi bei r? ni kan zhe ge!" ta shen chu lia lai, ta shi shen me yi si na?" ni bi wo da yi bei r a? ni wen wen qu ba. wo bi ni ba ba hai da liang bei r na!" hao, qian hou da si bei r. lao dao ke hai le pa la!" ai ya! wo shen yi ge shi yi fu ding li, ta shen lia, shi er sheng hu shen na." rang ta gei meng shang lai le. lao dao you shen le san ge zhi tou, na yi si shi shuo:" san huang zhi shi". sun de jing zhe er you zuo mo le:" ta zhe shi yi duo wei sheng, ta shen yi ge wo shen lia, ta shen sa wo shen si ge, ta zai lai wu ge, wo wan la, wo mei you liu zhi er, gan cui wo xian lai wu ge." lao dao yi kan:" ai ya, dui!' san huang zhi shi' zheng dui' wu di wei jun' na." quan nong dao liang xia qu la. lao dao yi pai xin kou, ta de yi si shi:" fu zai wo xin tou zuo." sun zhang gui yi qiao:" hao xiao zi, ni hai shi wan xiao, zhe shi gen sui wo chong tai ye na?" shou pai nao dai yi xia," a hei!" ta na yi si shi shuo:" ni chong tai ye ya, wo da ni ge lao zhang ren de." lao dao yi kan:" yo, wo' fu zai xin tou zuo', ta' tou shang you qing tian' na." man nong ning le! | |
| lao dao yi kan, da ya mi wo ying bu liao ta le. na guo yi zhang huang mao bian zhi lai. chi leng yi xia, ba bao jian la chu lai le. sun de long yi kan:" gan shen me? yao mo bo zi ya?" lao dao ba zhi cai le san tiao er, yong zhu sha bi shua shua hua le san dao fu, huo qian, huo shi da zhe le, ba la dian zhao le, yong bao jian jian er zha qi yi dao fu lai, zai la miao er shang yi dian, kou zhong nian nian you ci, yi huang zhe bao jian, zhe tuan huo yue huang yao yue da, yao na huo shao sun de long, sun zhang gui hai kai wan xiao na:" huo, wan er shang huo la, lao dao, na me da ge zi bie wan er huo ya, wan er huo wan shang shui jiao niao kang, ma ma da pi gu." lao dao zhe ge qi ya, zhe tuan huo guang you cha bei cu xi, huang lai huang qu you bing pan da xiao le, an li shuo zhe dao fu, jiu na me yi ge zhi tiao er, zhan huo jiu wan le. wei shi me zhe huo yue huang yue da ne? qi shi bing bu shi nian zhou nian de, hua fu de zhu sha li tou you yao cai. suo yi huo yue zhe yue da. dao le bing pan da xiao, zhe tuan huo jiu shuai guo qu le, zhi ben sun zhang gui de mian men, sun zhang gui wang pang bian r yi xie yi shen, yi wai nao dai:" hao xiao zi, shao ren ya!" ming chao ren long fa bao jin. zhe tuan huo ca gui de er gen tai le guo qu de, zi la yi xia, shao qu le ban bian fa ji. sun zhang gui yong shou yi hu lu, ba shou ye tang le. zhuo shang you yi wan wu gen shui, zhe wan liang shui jiu le ming la! wang nao dai shang yi jiao," hua!" huo mie le. lao dao yi kan tou dao ling fu mei cheng gong, zai lai yi zhang, ba di er dao fu dian zhao, sun zhang gui yi qiao:" hao xiao zi de li bu rang ren a, shao wan zhe ban la zai shao na ban la, yi gen tou fa mei you le. ni dang lao dao, rang wo dang he shang, zan lia yi kuai hua yuan qu. wo bu xiang chu jia ya, bie rong ta zai shao wo le, wo xian gei xiao zi yi gou gan zi ba." chao qi gou gan zi lai, chong zhe lao dao mian men miao zhun er. | |
| lao dao zhuang mu zuo yang de bi zhuo yan jing, yao huang nao dai, zui li du du rang rng jia zhuang na er nian zhou, ta zhe yi bi yan jing, sun zhang gui de lou er le. zen me? ta hao miao zhun er ya. na zhe gou gan zi lai hui you da, you da huan le, ta shuo zhe jiao gan er chao qian, gou zai hou, qu zhe mu, wang dui guo er chou, dui zhun le qian quan sa hou shou er:" zhe jia huo!" ta yao shi bu han zhe ju ya, zheng da dao lao dao de mian men shang. ta zhe yi han, lao dao zheng yan yi kan, zhi chuo chuo yi wu, zhi ben mian men er lai:" wu liang fu!" wang pang bian yi xie shen er, hai suan hao, mei da zhe. nin ke ting ming bai lou, gan shi mei da zhe, hou tou zhe lia gou ke bu rao ren a, pu chi yi xia zheng gou dao sai bang zi shang. wang xia yi bo gou gan zi, dai xia liang tiao zi rou lai, teng de lao dao wu sai bang zi zhi nian fo!" wu liang shou bu liao de fu!" sun de long hai gen zhe qi hong na:" bu liu shen, ai jia huo!" lao dao zhe ge qi ya, na zhe gou gan zi yi kan, ta bu zhi dao gan shen me yong de, xin li geng hai pa le:" ai ya, wo tai bu shi shi wu le. gang cai zhe wei fa guan yi lai de shi hou, shi jiao jia xiang yun, jin guang hu ti, cong tian er jiang, zhe yi ding shi shi ba luo han jin xian. xian zai yi kan guo ran shi da luo jin xian, ru ruo bu ran zen me neng ba xi tian ru lai wo fu de ba bao ru yi zi jin gou na lai." qi shi shi da zhu yong de. | |
| sun zhang gui ke le le!" xiao zi, ni ba wo tou fa shao diao le hai neng zhang a, ni zhe sai bang zi po le, ju wan de bu hui bu a!" ta xin li yi tong kuai, ke gao xing le. lao dao geng hai pa le, tou dao ling fu wo shao le ta ban bian fa ji, er dao ling fu wei zeng fa yong, ta jiu da le wo yi ba bao ru yi zi jin gou. zai yi qiao sun zhang gui na er, di liu yi ge qian kou dai, lao dao geng di gu le:" ta hai dai zhe bai bao nang na!" zai yi kan, sun zhang gui yao li tou shuan zhe jiu hu:" hao jia huo! hai gua zhe fan tian yin na!" zhe bu shi dao mei cui de ma, ta qiao shen me dou you yong la! yue zuo mo yue hai pa, gan cui san shi liu ji zou wei shang ce!" wu liang fu, pin dao wo yao hui guo jiao zhi."" ai! ni yao shi zou wo ke ji fa bao!"" bie jia! wo qu xian jian ni jia wan sui ye." shuo wan zhe hua yi dan pao xiu, mao chu hei yan bian le ge xi fa jiu xia tai le. zou dao tai he dian shang wang na er yi gui, ke tou jiu ru dao suan:" tian bang da guo wan sui kai en, xiao guo shi chen qing zui." huang shang na er kan de ming bai ya! ke shi ta men lia da de ya mi nian de shen me" wu liang fu"" hao jia huo", zhe quan bu dong you qiao lao dao na huo shao ren, sun zhang gui na shui ba huo shao mie le, huang shang gao xing le:" hao! shui neng ke huo." you kan lao dao you dian qi huo lai le, xin xiang tao yan de dong xi, ni yi jing ying le he bi gan jin sha jue. huang shang jing gu qiao zhe huo le, mei kan jian gou gan zi zen me guo qu de, yi qiao lao dao sai bang zi liu xie le, huang shang pai zhe ba zhang zhi le:" wo guo fa guan de sheng le. hao fa bao! hao fa bao!" xian zai yi kan lao dao xia lai le, huang shang ming bai, zhe shi ta shu le, shuo:" zhen ren, xian zai ni hai you shen me hua jiang?"" a ya! tian bang da guo wan sui kai en. bi guo ren shu, qing yuan nian nian jin gong, sui sui lai zhao."" ! wo de wen wen ni, ni men lia jian mian, ni shuo' wu liang fu' zhe shi zen me ju hua!"" zhe shi wo men chu jia ren de jian mian li er."" na me ta shuo na' hao jia huo' na!"" na wo shi zai bu dong, bu zhi dao shen me jiao hao jia huo."" na me ni shuo na' wu liang shou fo' na?"" zhe shi wen hou."" na wo guo fa guan shuo na ju' yi da dui po lan jia huo' na?"" zhe shi fa guan jia huo tai duo." yi zhi sai bang zi," wo zhe bu shi ai le yi jia huo ma!" hou lai ni bu shuo hua, shen yi ge shou zhi tou shi zen me hui shi?" shi da ya mi, wo shuo de shi' yi fu ding li'."" wo guo fa guan shen lia ne?"" ta shuo ta you' er sheng hu shen'."" ni shen sa ne?""' san huang zhi shi', ni jia fa guan you shen wu ge, ta shuo you' wu di wei jun' wo yi pai xin kou shuo,' fu zai wo xin tou zuo', ta yi pai nao dai, shuo ta' tou shang you qing tian'." hei! quan meng dui le! huang shang shuo:" na me ni na huo shi zen me hui shi qing?"" wo zhu kai en, wo shi xiang jiang gui guo fa guan reng xia fa tai."" heng! chu jia ren bu jiang ci bei. lian shang shi shen me shang de?"" ba bao ru yi zi jin gou." ta jiu bu zhi dao shi da zhu yong de, gui zai yi pang ting ge hou fa luo. | |
| chi shang wang fa tai shang yi kan, jiu gen jie da ren shuo:" zan men de fa guan zen me hai bu xia tai ya?" ta ye de xia de lai ya! sun zhang gui zai tai shang na neng er zhuan mo:" ai! zhe shi zen me hui shi, dao shi shu le ying le"? ta hai bu zhi dao na. huang shang yi qiao, shuo:" xiang bi wo jia fa guan bei mo huo shao shang, gan kuai pai ren ba fa guan jie xia fa tai." huang shang zhe ju hua de xing da le. gang cai reng shang qu de, zhe yao shi wang xia tiao fei shuai si bu ke. huang shang yi shuo ba ta jie xia lai, you ren li hao le yun ti, sun zhang gui shun ti zi jiu xia lai le. jie da ren guo lai shuo:" zou, gen wo jian huang shang qu, yao duo ke tou shao shuo hua." zen me? pa ta jian huang shang zai lai ge" zan ge lia lao mei jian le". sun de long dao le tai he dian tou li, chong huang shang zuo le ge da yi:" he!" huang shang yi qiao, ni yao yao wo shi zen me zhao?" zan gei lao huang shang ke tou le." ta zhe yi ying, huang shang gao xing:" fa guan tai qi tou lai." bie ren dou de shuo" you zui bu gan tai tou"," shu ni wu zui", zhe cai tai tou." sun zhang gui man bu dong, yi tai tou zhi mei deng yan qiao zhe huang shang:" gan shen me?" shang ren jian xi, huang shang le le:" fa guan ni dou fa shi shu le shi ying le?" sun zhang gui jiu pa wen zhe ju, shu ying lian ta zi ji ye bu zhi dao, ta di xia tou qu zhuang ting bu jian. ta zhe yi di tou, huang shang you wen:" ni shu le ni ying le?" ta wang pang bian yi kan, zheng qiao jian lao dao. zheng gan shang zhe shi hou huang shang wen zhe di san ju:" fa guan! ni gen lao dao dou fa shi shu le shi ying le?"" wo shuo huang shang, ni lao ren jia wen wo shu le ying le, zhe ge hua wo bu hao shuo ya! zen me ne? wo yao shi shuo wo ying le, na jiao lao wang mai gua zi mai zi kua ke wo yao shi shuo wo shu le ba, wo gan shen me lai le? mei you jin gang zuan jiu bu gan lan ci qi." jie da ren yi ting: ni na er na me duo qiao pi hua er a!" ni lao ren jia wen wo shu le wo ying le, ni bie wen wo." yi zhi lao dao," ni wen ta! ta shuo wo shu le jiu suan wo shu le, ta shuo wo ying le jiu suan wo ying le. lao dao! ni yao shi shuo wo shu le zan lia shang tai zai gan." lao dao yi wu sai bang zi:" gan bu liao! ta ying le."" huang shang ting jian le ba, wo ying le! wo ying le!" huang shang shuo:" fa guan ni jiao shen me ming zi?"" wo xing sun jiao sun de long, zhu jia zai rou shi, de long guan na ge xiao mai mai shi wo kai de, zan shi zhun jin shi liu liang jue bu shao gei fen liang." shui wen zhe ge le!" ni men lia yi jian mian, ta shuo' wu liang fu' shi zen me hui shi?"" zhe' wu liang fu' shi zen me ju hua, huang shang! | |
| zhe ge lao dao wo ren de." lao dao yi ting xia le yi tiao, ta ren de wo, wo zen bu ren de ta ya? ni na er ren de qu, ta shi mai zhu rou de!" zhe ge lao dao shi hua yuan de."" hua yuan gan ma shuo' wu liang fu' na?"" wo kai rou guan zi, ta men hua yuan, he shang nian' mi tuo fu', lao dao nian' wu liang fu', jiu shi gen wo yao qian na."" na me ni shuo na' hao jia huo' na?"" wo shuo' hao jia huo', xin li xiang, zen me gang zou lia you lai yi ge?" lao dao ting zhe zhe tong er wo xin na." na me ni men lia ren da ya mi, ta shen yi ge shou zhi tou shi zen me hui shi qing?"" sun zhang gui yi xiang: zhe hui ke zao le, lao dao shen yi ge shou zhi tou shi gen wo kai wan xiao, ta shuo shi bi wo da yi bei, wo shen lia, wo shuo bi ta ba ba da liang bei, zhe hua bu neng gen huang shang shuo, hui tou zhe lao dao ruo you le zui, ye xu jiu mie men jiu zu, ta bi wo da yi bei, wo bi ta ba ba da liang bei, zen me ye mei chu jiu zu a, gan cui wo xia bian ge ci ba, zhe yi bian ci ba lao dao gei song xia lai le:" huang shang! ta mei gen da ya mi!" huang shang shuo:" zen me? ta shen yi ge ni shen lia, ta shen sa ni shen wu ge, ta yi pai xin kou ni yi pai nao dai, zhe bu shi da ya mi na ma?"" bu! zhe shi jiang mai mai na!"" jiang shen me mai mai a?"" ta zhi dao wo shi rou shi shang mai zhu rou de, ta miao li tou ban xi shi ta xiang mai wo yi kou zhu." wo shuo, ni bie shuo mai yi ge, ni xiang mai lia wo dou you wa, ta shuo, yao ge san shi lai jin de, wo xiang, wo na er ding shao ye you wu shi lai jin de ta shuo ke de dai xin gan fei wo shuo, beng shuo xin gan fei, lian zhu tou dou gui ni ya!" |
| míng cháo yǒng lè nián jiān, běi jīng qián mén dà jiē wǔ pái lóu shí zhù zi shàng tou, tiē zhe yī zhāng huáng bǎng. huáng bǎng zhè me yī tiē, jīng dòng le quán chéng de lǎo bǎi xìng. yóu qí shì qián sān mén wài rén yān chóu mì, shāng gǔ yún jí. huáng bǎng wǎng wài yī tiē, jīng dòng le dà jiē shàng guò lù de rén, yě yǒu sēng dào èr mén, huí hàn èr jiào, zhū zǐ bǎi jiā, shì nóng gōng shāng, wǔ háng bā zuò, yī bǎi liǎng shí háng, yě yǒu zuò guān de wèi huàn de, bèi gōng de guà jiàn de, tuī chē de, dān dān de, mài méi de mài tàn de, mài zhēn mài qián de, mài bǐng mài miàn dí, jū guō mài suàn de, mài shāo bǐng yóu tiáo de, mài chá yè jī dàn de zhèi xiē rén nǎ, dà jiā bù zhī dào guó jiā chū le shén me shì qíng, wèi shí me yào tiē huáng bǎng, dōu zhēng xiān kǒng hòu wéi zhe kàn. | |
| jiù zài zhè gè shí hòu, yóu běi biān lái le yí ge rén, zhè gè rén xìng sūn jiào sūn dé lóng, tā shì dōng sì pái lóu zhū shì dà jiē mài ròu de, yě huì kǔn zhū zǎi zhū, shì shān dōng dēng zhōu fǔ de rén, sì shí duō suì ér, hǎo hē jiǔ. zhè tiān gāng dǎ ròu shì shàng huí lái, gē zhī wō jiā zhe gè dā zhū de gōu gān zǐ, zhè shì bái là gān zǐ, yǒu hé táo cū xì, wǔ chǐ duō zhǎng, tóu lǐ yǒu liǎng gè tóng gōu zi, zhū yào shì pǎo le, lí tā wǔ chǐ yī dā jiù dā huí lái. zhè shǒu dī liū gè qián kǒu dài, zhè gē zhī wō hái jiā zhe zhàng běn, yāo lǐ xì zhe gēn shéng zi, shéng zi shàng guà zhe yī bǎ xī là de jiǔ hú, cā dé shì zèng guāng wǎ liàng, chuān zhe gè bù mián páo, kě yǐ jīng biàn chéng duàn zi de le. zěn me huí shì nǎ? yīn wèi tā qiè wán ròu yě wǎng shàng mǒ, qiè wán yóu yě wǎng shàng mò, rì zi yī cháng, jiù gēn xiàn zài lǐ fà guǎn nà gāng dāo bù yí gè mú yàng le. | |
| zhè tiān xià le shì, gāng dǎ jiǔ pù hē wán jiǔ chū lái, hē dé mǐng dǐng dà zuì, zǒu dào ér jiǎo dǐ xià zhí bàn suàn, zuǐ lǐ shuō huà yě bù lì luò le xué shān dōng kǒu yīn:" zhè gè jiǔ wa shì gāo liáng shuǐ, zuì rén xiān zuì tuǐ, yǎn jīng kàn bú jiàn dào, jiǎn zhí shì huó jiàn guǐ!" zǒu dào huáng bǎng tóu lǐ yī kàn, wéi zhe yī quān zi rén:" zán jiè jiè guāng!" tā jǐ jìn qù le, dào lǐ biān yī qiáo shì bàng, tā bù rèn shi zì, tā yào wèn wèn, bā lā nà wèi:" āi! zhè zěn me huí shì?" zhè wèi shuō:" nǐ màn zhe diǎn, qiàn diǎn chà le qì, zhè shì huáng bǎng."" shén me jiào huáng bǎng a?"" huáng shàng jiā tiē de!"" nín niàn niàn wǒ tīng tīng xíng ma?"" kě yǐ, nǐ tīng zhe a.' fèng tiān chéng yùn huáng dì zhào yuē: yīn chéng huà qī nián yǒu liú qiú guó qián lái jìn gòng, míng wèi jìn gòng, shí wèi nà bāng pài le gè lǎo dào yì zhēn rén, qián lái dòu fǎ'"" xíng le! xíng le! nǐ bié wǎng xià niàn le, nǐ niàn le bàn tiān wǒ yī jù dōu bù dǒng a?"" wǒ bái niàn le."" wǒ xiān wèn wèn nǐ tóu liǎng jù shì shén me?""' fèng tiān chéng yùn huáng dì zhào yuē'."" zěn me jiào' huáng dì zhào yuē'?" huáng shàng shuō huà jiù shì' huáng dì zhào yuē'."" nà wǒ yào shì shuō huà ne?"" nà bù zhī dào shén me yuē le."" hǎo, nǐ wǎng xià niàn ba." zhè wèi xiǎng: wǒ bié niàn le, niàn wán le zài jiǎng shòu bù liǎo. gān cuì wǒ gào sù tā zhè yì sī dé le:" liú qiú guó nián nián jìn gòng suì suì chēng chén, jīn nián pài le gè lǎo dào lái, tā huì dǎ sān shí liù shǒu yǎ mí, huì niàn qī shí bù jīn gāng jīng, zhǎo zán men zhōng guó rén dòu fǎ. rú guǒ yíng le tā, tā men cái néng nián nián jìn gòng, suì suì chēng chén, yíng bù liǎo, huò zhě méi rén gēn tā dòu fǎ, nà jiù tā men liú qiú wèi shàng bāng, wǒ men dà míng wèi shǔ guó. xiàn zài huáng shàng tiē huáng bǎng xuǎn néng rén, rú guǒ yǒu rén huì dǎ yǎ mí huì niàn jīn gāng jīng, lái gēn lǎo dào dòu fǎ, yíng le lǎo dào de huà, yào duō shǎo qián gěi duō shǎo qián, yào duō dà guān fēng duō dà guān, nǐ wèn zhè gè yě méi yòng a, nǐ bú huì dǎ yǎ mí, nǐ yòu bú huì niàn jīn gāng jīng." | |
| zhè jù huà xíng le, sūn dé lóng yǒu gè wài háo jiào wàn shì tōng, shén me shì nǐ yào shì shuō tā bù xíng, dāng shí jiù jí:" nǐ bié shuō le! nǐ zěn me zhī dào wǒ bú huì dǎ yǎ mí? nǐ zěn me zhī dào wǒ bú huì niàn jīn gāng jīng?"" ō! nín huì a?"" wǒ bú huì wǒ néng zhǎng gè nǎo dài ma?"" āi yā! nǐ huì nà gèng hǎo le, nín gǎn kuài jiē huáng bǎng zhǎo lǎo dào dòu fǎ qù." shān dōng ér gāng yào guò qù jiē, nà wèi xiǎng: xiān bié máng, wǒ dé gěi nín niàn qīng chǔ lóu!" huáng bǎng shàng xiě zhe lǎo dào huì dǎ sān shí liù shǒu yǎ mí, nín huì nà me xiē gè ma?"" tā huì duō shǎo?"" sān shí liù shǒu."" zán huì qī shí èr shǒu."" huò! bǐ tā huì de duō yī bèi. lǎo dào huì niàn qī shí bù jīn gāng jīng."" wǒ nà gè jīn gāng jīng niàn qǐ lái méi wán."" nà nín jiù jiē huáng bǎng ba."" wǒ gòu bù zháo."" nín shǒu lǐ ná de shì shén me ya?"" dā zhū de gōu gān zǐ."" nín bú huì yòng tā gōu ma?"" duì!" sī! tā gěi gōu le. kàn bǎng bīng dīng yī kàn zuì hàn sī le huáng bǎng, mó jiān tóu lǒng èr bì bǎng shàng la, tuī zhe tā qù jiàn bǎng guān. | |
| bǎng guān shì jiě xué shì dà rén, shān dōng ér dào zhè ér lì ér bù guì, chōng jiě dà rén yī piě zuǐ, yī tái xià bā kē:" wǒ shuō nǐ xìng shén me?" jiě dà rén yī tīng yào guò wǒ yī táng shì zěn me zhāo?" wǒ xìng jiě."" jiě dà rén, nǐ jiǎng lǐ bù jiǎng lǐ?"" zěn me huí shì?"" zhǎo lǎo dào dòu fǎ, nán dào shuō jiù kǔn zhe qù ma?"" āi yōu! nǐ shì fǎ guān nǎ." gǎn jǐn jiù mán yuàn kàn bǎng de bīng dīng:" nǐ men zhèi xiē dōng xī zhēn kě hèn, zěn me bǎ fǎ guān kǔn lái le." gǎn jǐn guò qù qīn zì sōng bǎng. wū lǐ tou jiù yí gè zuò:" fǎ guān qǐng zuò ba." yīng gāi shì shuài bù lí wèi ya, sūn dé lóng yě bù dǒng, yī pì gǔ jiù zuò xià la zuò xià bù suàn, tā zhè jù huà kě qì:" āi! nǐ zuò zài nǎ ér ya!" jiě dà rén shuō:" nà wǒ jiù zhàn zhe ba."" wǒ shuō lǎo dà rén a! zhè lǎo dào zán shàng nǎ ér zhǎo tā qù?"" tā zài jiāng mǐ xiàng jīn tái guǎn yì. zǒu ba, nǐ xiān gēn wǒ jiàn jià qù ba."" jiàn něi gè jià ya?"" jiàn huáng shǎng qù a."" nà tài hǎo le, wǒ men gē ér liǎ yǒu rì zi méi jiàn le." gēn huáng shàng gē ér liǎ!" fǎ guān zán men jìn gōng nín shì qí mǎ a, shì zuò jiào a?"" quán bù yòng."" quán bù yòng, yòng shén me fǎ shù?"" qí lǘ."" qí lǘ nǎ ér gěi nín zhǎo qù ya?"" méi lǘ wǒ bù qù le." jiě dà rén méi fǎ zǐ, dǎ zhāng yí mén gù pǐ xiǎo lǘ dào le gōng lǐ tou, ràng shān dōng ér dào dōng cháo fáng. | |
| jiě dà rén qù jiāo zhǐ, huáng shàng shí fēn xǐ yuè, fēn fù jí kè zhào jiàn. jiě dà rén yī xiǎng: bù néng ràng tā jiàn jià yě méi dào lǐ bù yǎn lǐ, zuǐ lǐ tou bù dìng shuō chū shén me lái, huí tóu jiàn huáng shàng yī zuō yī:" zán gē liǎ lǎo méi jiàn le!" wǒ zhè shā mào yě jiù diū le, gǎn jǐn jiù shuō:" wàn suì! fǎ guān shì wài shěng rén, cái lái jīng chéng bù jiǔ, yòu méi dào lǐ bù yǎn lǐ, kǒng mào fàn tiān yán yǒu shī yí zhī zuì, yī chén zhī jiàn, zhǎo lái lǎo dào xiān dòu fǎ, dòu fǎ zhī hòu zài jiàn yě bù wéi wǎn. ruò yíng le lǎo dào, jiàn jià shí tǎng yǒu shī yí zhī zuì, wǒ huáng wàn suì yě néng liàng qíng yī èr." | |
| dāng shí jiù pài rén cóng jīn tái guǎn yì bǎ lǎo dào zhǎo lái, gào sù shuō wǒ guó yǒu rén gēn nǐ dòu fǎ. lǎo dào chū zhǔ yi, jiù zài tài hé diàn qián gāo dā liǎng zuò fǎ tái, dōu yào sān zhàng duō gāo, shàng tou yù bèi bā xiān zhuō zi yī zhāng, tài shī yǐ zi yī bǎ, xiāng lú wǔ gōng là qiān huáng máo biān zhǐ zhū shā bǐ xiāng cài wǔ gǔ zá liáng yī wǎn wú gēn shuǐ." nǐ jiā fǎ guān xū yòng hé wù nǐ wèn tā." jiě dà rén yī zuó mo, gān cuì yě gěi tā yù bèi zhè me yī fèn dé le. rén duō hǎo zuò huó, dāng shí fǎ tái dā hǎo, dōng xī yě yù bèi qí le, lǎo dào yī dǒu páo xiù, yǒu yī gǔ hēi xuàn fēng jiù gěi tā tuō shǎng qù le, wén wǔ bǎi guān mù dèng kǒu dāi. | |
| huáng shàng chuán zhǐ:" jiào jiě dà rén qǐng zán men de fǎ guān gēn lǎo dào dòu fǎ, yě ràng zán men fǎ guān jià fēng huò zhě jià yún shàng fǎ tái." jiě dà rén gǎn jǐn pǎo dào dōng cháo fáng qù zhǎo fǎ guān, jìn wū lǐ yī qiáo wa, fǎ guān tǎng zài dì xià shuì zháo le. jiě dà rén gǎn jǐn guò qù jiào:" fǎ guān! qǐ lái!"" bié nào!"" shuí gēn nǐ nào le! bǎ tā wǎn qǐ lái." sūn zhǎng guì róu le róu yǎn jīng, wǎng sì chù yī kàn, zhè shì huáng gōng lǐ tou, jīn bì guāng huī, fù lì táng huáng." āi! lǎo dà rén! zhè shì něi gè chǎng r?"" huáng gōng nèi yuàn."" wǒ shàng zhè gè dì fāng gàn shén me lái le?"" a! nǐ wàng le, nǐ bú shì zhǎo lǎo dào dòu fǎ lái le ma? xiàn zài lǎo dào zài fǎ tái shàng děng zhe nǐ ne. huáng shàng bǎo zuò shēng dào diàn wài, yào kàn nǐ èr rén rú hé dòu fǎ." sūn zhǎng guì yī tīng kě xià huài le:" zěn me huí shì a?" gāng cái tā jiē huáng bǎng de shí hòu jiǔ hē dé shí chéng zuì, zài dì xià shuì le bàn tiān jué, bǎ jiǔ qì gěi bīng xià qù le. gāng cái jiē huáng bǎng nà chá ér quán wàng le. xiàn zài tīng jiě dà rén zhè me yī shuō, zì jǐ yī xiǎng, wǒ hē jiǔ hē dé tài duō le. jiǔ hòu nào shì jiē le huáng bǎng, wǒ shì gè mǎi mài rén, mài zhū ròu de, nǎ ér huì gēn lǎo dào dòu fǎ ya! zài shuō zhè lǎo dào shì dǎ wài guó lái de, lái zhě bù shàn, shàn zhě bù lái. wǒ zhè bú shì tǒng lóu zǐ ma? xiǎng dào zhè ér, zuǒ yòu kāi gōng, pā pā pā! zì jǐ dǎ le sì gè zuǐ bā:" wǒ hú tú, wǒ hú tú!" wǎng hòu yī tuì bù, gū dōng guì xià le:" lǎo dà rén nǎ, wǒ hē duō le, wǒ sī huáng bǎng shì shuǎ fēng ér, wǒ shì gè mǎi mài rén, jiù dǒng de mài zhū ròu. dòu fǎ zhè gè shì ér gān cuì nǐ zhǎo bié rén ér qù ba! zhè gè shì ér, wǒ shì bàn bù liǎo a. nǐ ruò bù chū qì de huà, nǐ gěi wǒ liǎ zuǐ bā, nǐ ná wǒ dāng gè fēng zhēng bǎ wǒ fàng le ba!"" a?" jiě dà rén yī tīng zhè gè qì ya, qì dé hún shēn luàn dǒu, shā mào chì luàn dòng. shì lián shēng qì dài hài pà, gǎn jǐn jiù shuō:" ō, nǐ hē duō le? nǐ zhè gè jiǔ hē dé kě tài xiōng le! nǐ mō mō nǐ hái yǒu nǎo dài méi yǒu? wǒ gěi nǐ liǎ zuǐ bā bǎ nǐ fàng le jiù wán la? nǐ gēn wǒ zhè me shuō xíng le, wǒ gēn huáng shàng yào shì zhè me shuō, shì qī jūn wù guó, qī jūn shì xiǎo, wù guó shì dà. xiàn zài lǎo dào yǐ jīng lái le, huáng shàng ná shén me huà lái huí dá tā ya? zhè me dà guó jiā ràng nǐ gěi shī xìn, zán liǎng rén quán huó bù liǎo, nǐ shì xù jiǔ nào shì sī huáng bǎng, xì shuǎ kàn bǎng qīn chāi dà chén, wǒ shì bàn shì bù lì, cuò yǐn fěi lèi rù gōng, qī jūn wù guó. shuō zán liǎng gè rén de sǐ zuì yǒu yīng de, huò yóu zì qǔ, huáng shàng gēn zhe diū rén, ruò dà zhōng guó shī qù tiān wēi, liú qiú wèi shàng bāng, wǒ dà míng wèi shǔ guó, zán men jiù quán chéng le wáng guó nú lì le." sūn dé lóng guì zhe zhè me yī tīng, tā kě jí le." hài!" pā! tā yī pāi xīn kǒu, gāng cái hē de nà diǎn jiǔ yòu dōu zhuàng shàng lái le, guì zhe hǎo hǎo de, cēng léng tā bèng qǐ lái le:" lǎo dà rén ya! bú yào jǐn! zhào nǐ zhè yī shuō zán liǎ bù jiù méi mìng le ma? méi mìng jiù hǎo bàn le, wǒ bù zhǎo lǎo dào dòu fǎ bú shì yě huó bù liǎo ma? zhè jiào níng sǐ zhèn qián bù sǐ zhèn hòu, nǎo dài diào liǎo bù shì cái wǎn dà de bā là ma? bié kàn gēn lǎo dào dòu fǎ bù xíng, dǎ jià tā hái bù zhǔn shì gè ér nǎ! zǒu! zán zhǎo tā qù." jiě dà rén yī tīng:" nǐ dào dǐ huì bú huì ya?"" hài! nǐ jiù zǒu ba!" | |
| jiě dà rén yě méi bàn fǎ le, zhǐ hǎo bǎ tā lǐng dào fǎ tái xià biān, yòng shǒu yī zhǐ dōng biān de zhè zuò fǎ tái:" nǐ kàn! lǎo dào yǐ jīng zài shàng biān dǎ shàng zuò le." sūn dé lóng yī qiáo:" lǎo dà rén, tā shàng nà biān, wǒ jiù shàng zhè biān r le, wǒ men liǎ yào shì shàng yī biān, nà wèi zhēng dì pán ér bù jiù dǎ qǐ lái le ma?"" kuài shàng ba!"" zhè fǎ tái yǒu duō gāo?"" sān zhàng sān!"" sān zhàng sān nǎ? jiǔ zhàng jiǔ yě bú yào jǐn nǎ. lái rén!"" gàn má ya?"" bān tī zi."" bān tī zi kě bù xíng, huáng shàng yǐ jīng zhuàn guò zhǐ le, huò shì jià fēng huò shì jià yún, yīn wèi lǎo dào shì jià fēng shǎng qù de." zhè qí shí ya, lǎo dào yě bú shì jià fēng. nà me gāng cái nǐ shuō de bú shì yī dǒu páo xiù yǒu gǔ hēi xuàn fēng, guǒ zhe lǎo dào shǎng qù de ma? gāng shì gè xì fǎ ér, zài tā xiù kǒu ér lǐ biān yǒu gè tiě tǒng ér, tiě tǒng lǐ tou, zhuāng de shì láng fèn tàn bǐng dà qīng, bǎ tā diǎn zháo le. yòng de shí hòu, tā yī dǒu páo xiù, jiù bǎ nà gài r dǎ kāi le, nǐ xiǎng tā chuān de shì dào páo, dà lǐng ér, zhèi xiē gè hēi yān shùn bó zi dà jīn dǐ jīn quán mào chū lái le, láng fèn diǎn zháo liǎo bù sàn, dà qīng zhè wèi yào diǎn zháo le jìng mào hēi yān, hǎo xiàng hēi xuàn fēng guǒ zhe tā yí yàng. qí shí ya, shǒu shàng jiǎo shàng dōu yǒu xiǎo gōu zi. tā shì cóng fǎ tái de shān gǎo pá shǎng qù de. sūn dé lóng yī tīng yào jià fēng jià yún, jiù wèn jiě dà rén:" lǎo dà rén, wǒ jià shén me fēng ya?"" chèn jiǎo fēng bei."" wǒ huì chōu yáng jiǎo fēng."" nà méi yòng."" hài, gān cuì, méi tī zi wǒ bù qù le."" āi, bié jià a." sūn dé lóng zháo jí jiù yào wǎng fǎ tái qián biān zhuǎn." bié wǎng qián biān qù, huáng shàng zài qián biān nǎ."" wǒ chǒu chǒu." jiě dà rén yī tīng, yǒu chǒu huáng shàng de ma?" zuò nà ér nà gè rén ér shì shuí ya?"" nà jiù shì huáng shàng a."" páng biān nà zhàn zhe bā gè gè gāo gè ér, shì gàn shén me de?"" nà shi bǎo jià de, jīn guā wǔ shì."" tā shǒu lǐ jǔ zhe de nà shi shén me?"" nà shi jīn guā."" nǐ bǎ nà tóu yí gè dǐng gāo gè ér de jiào guò lái wǒ yǒu shì ér." jiě dà rén guò qù yī qiáo, zhè wèi shì tài hé diàn tóu děng shì wèi bái wén yuán bái lǎo yé." bái lǎo yé, guò lái wǒ gěi nín yǐn jiàn gè péng yǒu. zhè wèi shì lái dòu fǎ de sūn fǎ guān. zhè wèi jiù shì tài hé diàn tóu děng shì wèi bái wén yuán bái lǎo yé."" ó, bái dà rén, nǐ hǎo a, qǐng nǐ bāng bāng máng ba."" shén me shì nǎ?"" wǒ shàng fǎ tái."" yǔ wǒ yǒu shén me guān xì ya?"" méi nǐ wǒ shàng bù qù ya. | |
| "" zěn me nǎ?"" nǐ xiǎng a, zhè fǎ tái sān zhàng sān, nǐ duō gāo shēn liàng?"" wǒ ya? huáng shàng xuǎn zuì gāo gè ér de, shēn gāo jiǔ chǐ."" nǐ shǒu lǐ jǔ zhe zhè gè jīn guā duō zhǎng?"" yī zhàng sì de guā bà er, yī chǐ de guā tóu, yī gòng yī zhàng wǔ."" a, duì ya! yī zhàng wǔ, shēn gāo jiǔ chǐ jiù shì èr zhàng sì, gē bó shēn cháng le èr chǐ, liǎng zhàng liù sān zhàng sān chà bù lí r le." bái dà rén yī tīng: tā zhè ér suàn shén me nǎ?" a, nǐ bǎ zhè guā fàng píng lóu, nǐ liǎng shǒu zuàn zhù guā bà er, wǒ zuò zài guā tóu shàng nǐ bù jiù bǎ wǒ rēng shǎng qù ma?"" zhè méi tīng shuō guò."" nǐ ruò bù rēng wǒ kě zǒu la!" jiě dà rén gǎn jǐn pǎo guò lái shuō:" bái lǎo yé, nín shòu lěi bāng bāng máng, shì shì kàn ba." bái wén yuán qì dé zhí dǒu shǒu. zhè jiào shén me shì a! yě méi bàn fǎ, zhǐ hǎo shì shì kàn, jiù bǎ jīn guā fàng píng lóu, liǎng shǒu zhuā zhù guā bà er, shuō:" lái ba"! sūn dé lóng zuò dào guā tóu shàng, bái lǎo yé shuō:" nín tí zhe diǎn qì bié wǎng xià zhuì zhe." bái lǎo yé yùn zú le qì lì:" wǒ kě yào rēng le a! a hēi! zhè yī xià zǐ zhēn bù hán hu, fǎ tái sān zhàng sān rēng shàng yǒu sì zhàng sì qù. guò le fǎ tái hái yī zhàng duō nǎ, jiù zhè yī zhàng duō gāo ya, fǎ tái dōu shì èr cùn duō hòu de bǎn zi, jiù suàn shuāi bù sǐ tā yě de shuāi gè bàn sǐ. gāi zháo zhè gè lǎo dào dǎo méi, sūn dé lóng méi shuāi zhe, bù dàn méi shuāi zhe, bìng qiě hái zhàn dào fǎ tái shǎng qù le, nà wèi shuō, nǐ shuō de zhè gè bù hé lǐ, tā rēng shǎng qù wǎng xià luò, zěn me yě de yāo cháo xià, nà jiù shì tǎng dào nà le, zěn me néng zhàn zhe ne? zhè lǐ tou yǒu gè yuán yīn: tā gē zhī wō jiā zhe yí gè dā zhū de gōu gān zǐ, yǒu wǔ chǐ duō zhǎng, nín xiǎng a, tā guò le fǎ hé yī zhàng yī, cóng zhè yī zhàng yī wǎng tái shàng luò de shí hòu, là xià wǔ chǐ duō, gōu gān zǐ bà er jiù chuō dào tái bǎn shàng le. gē zhī wō jiā zhe gōu gān zǐ wǎng xià yī chū liū, jiǎo jiù cǎi zhe tái bǎn le. shǒu yī níng gōu gān zǐ, hāi! tā zhàn zhù le. | |
| zhè gè lǎo dào a, zhèng zài duì miàn fǎ tái shàng bì mù hé yǎn dǎ zuò yǎng shén, sūn dé lóng zěn me lái de, zěn me zuò zhe jīn guā wǎng shàng rēng, tā quán bù zhī dào, yīn wèi tā shì bì mù yǎng shén nǎ, tā zhēng yǎn zhè gè shí hòu, shì dǎo méi cuī de, zhèng shì sūn dé lóng yóu yī zhàng yī wǎng xià luò de shí hòu, lǎo dào yī kàn jiù hài pà le:" āi yā, liǎo bù dé, zhōng guó zhēn yǒu gāo rén. pín dào jià zhe fēng shàng fǎ tái, zěn me zhōng guó de fǎ guān huì cóng tiān ér jiàng nǎ." rēng shàng lái tā méi qiáo jiàn. lǎo dào zài yī kàn sūn zhǎng guì, tā gèng hài pà le:" zhè wèi fǎ guān jiǎo jià yàng yún, jīn guāng hù tǐ ya!" jiǎo jià yàng yún shì sūn zhǎng guì bǎ xiāng lú bā lā dào tái shàng le, xiāng huī zhè me yī pū, gēn yún cǎi yí yàng nà gè jīn guāng hù tǐ ya, shì sūn zhǎng guì nà gè yóu mián páo, tài yáng yī zhào zhū yóu fàng guāng. nín shuō zhè lǎo dào bú shì dǎo méi cuī de ma. dǎ zhàng shì qiè dí bì bài, tā bù dàn xià dé zhí duō suo, lián gān ér dōu chàn le, lǎo dào yī xiǎng:" zhè kě dé duō jiā liú shén." yuè liú shén yuè huài, lǎo dào dān shǒu dǎ qǐ shǒu, kǒu niàn:" wú liàng fú!" bié kàn tā shēn liàng ǎi, shēng rú tóng zhōng. lǎo dào yī niàn fó, sūn zhǎng guì yī xiǎng wǒ yě de shuō yī jù ya:" a, hǎo jiā huo!" rén jiā niàn wú liàng fú, tā niàn hǎo jiā huo. lǎo dào yòu shuō le yī jù:" wú liàng shòu fú." sūn zhǎng guì yī tīng jiā zì ér le:" yī dà duī pò làn jiā huo!" | |
| lǎo dào yī tīng: tā zhè jiā huo hái zhēn bù shǎo, wǒ méi nà me duō jiā huo, gān cuì gēn tā dǎ yǎ mí dé le. chōng sūn zhǎng guì shēn chū yí gè shǒu zhí tou qù, zhè jiù shì yǎ mí. lǎo dào de yì sī shì:" nǐ bié qiáo bù qǐ wǒ, wǒ yǒu yī fú dǐng lǐ." sūn zhǎng guì bù dǒng a, tā jiē huáng bǎng de shí hòu bú shì shuō huì dǎ yǎ mí ma? kě shì tā dǎ nà yǎ mí gēn lǎo dào zhè gè bù yí yàng a. tā shì ròu shì shàng mài zhū ròu de. zhè gè zhū duō dà fèn liàng duō shǎo qián duō shǎo zhěng ér duō shǎo líng ér, liǎng gè lā lā shǒu ér, shì zhè gè yǎ mí. tā yī kàn lǎo dào shēn le yí gè dà mǔ zhǐ,:" zhè shì gàn shén me? kāi wán xiào a? zhàn pián yí bǐ wǒ dà yī bèi r? nǐ kàn zhè gè!" tā shēn chū liǎ lái, tā shì shén me yì sī nǎ?" nǐ bǐ wǒ dà yī bèi r a? nǐ wèn wèn qù ba. wǒ bǐ nǐ bà bà hái dà liǎng bèi r nǎ!" hǎo, qián hòu dà sì bèi r. lǎo dào kě hài le pà la!" āi yā! wǒ shēn yí gè shì yī fú dǐng lǐ, tā shēn liǎ, shì èr shèng hù shēn nǎ." ràng tā gěi méng shàng lái le. lǎo dào yòu shēn le sān ge zhǐ tou, nà yì sī shì shuō:" sān huáng zhì shì". sūn dé jīng zhè ér yòu zuó mo le:" tā zhè shì yǐ duō wèi shèng, tā shēn yí gè wǒ shēn liǎ, tā shēn sā wǒ shēn sì gè, tā zài lái wǔ gè, wǒ wán la, wǒ méi yǒu liù zhǐ ér, gān cuì wǒ xiān lái wǔ gè." lǎo dào yī kàn:" āi yā, duì!' sān huáng zhì shì' zhèng duì' wǔ dì wèi jūn' nǎ." quán nòng dào liǎng xià qù la. lǎo dào yī pāi xīn kǒu, tā de yì sī shì:" fú zài wǒ xīn tóu zuò." sūn zhǎng guì yī qiáo:" hǎo xiǎo zi, nǐ hái shì wán xiào, zhè shì gēn suí wǒ chōng tài yé nǎ?" shǒu pāi nǎo dài yī xià," a hēi!" tā nà yì sī shì shuō:" nǐ chōng tài yé ya, wǒ dǎ nǐ gè lǎo zhàng rén de." lǎo dào yī kàn:" yō, wǒ' fú zài xīn tóu zuò', tā' tóu shàng yǒu qīng tiān' nǎ." mǎn nòng níng le! | |
| lǎo dào yī kàn, dǎ yǎ mí wǒ yíng bù liǎo tā le. ná guò yī zhāng huáng máo biān zhǐ lái. chī lèng yī xià, bǎ bǎo jiàn lā chū lái le. sūn dé lóng yī kàn:" gàn shén me? yào mǒ bó zi ya?" lǎo dào bǎ zhǐ cái le sān tiáo ér, yòng zhū shā bǐ shuā shuā huà le sān dào fú, huǒ qián, huǒ shí dǎ zhe le, bǎ là diǎn zháo le, yòng bǎo jiàn jiān ér zhā qǐ yī dào fú lái, zài là miáo ér shàng yì diǎn, kǒu zhōng niàn niàn yǒu cí, yī huǎng zhè bǎo jiàn, zhè tuán huǒ yuè huǎng yáo yuè dà, yào ná huǒ shāo sūn dé lóng, sūn zhǎng guì hái kāi wán xiào nǎ:" huò, wán ér shàng huǒ la, lǎo dào, nà me dà gè zi bié wán ér huǒ ya, wán ér huǒ wǎn shàng shuì jiào niào kàng, mā mā dǎ pì gu." lǎo dào zhè gè qì ya, zhè tuán huǒ guāng yǒu chá bēi cū xì, huǎng lái huǎng qù yǒu bīng pán dà xiǎo le, àn lǐ shuō zhè dào fú, jiù nà me yí gè zhǐ tiáo ér, zhān huǒ jiù wán le. wèi shí me zhè huǒ yuè huǎng yuè dà ne? qí shí bìng bú shì niàn zhòu niàn de, huà fú de zhū shā lǐ tou yǒu yào cái. suǒ yǐ huǒ yuè zhe yuè dà. dào le bīng pán dà xiǎo, zhè tuán huǒ jiù shuǎi guò qù le, zhí bèn sūn zhǎng guì de miàn mén, sūn zhǎng guì wǎng páng biān r yī xié yī shēn, yī wāi nǎo dài:" hǎo xiǎo zi, shāo rén ya!" míng cháo rén lǒng fā bāo jīn. zhè tuán huǒ cā guì de ěr gēn tái le guò qù de, zī la yī xià, shāo qù le bàn biān fà jì. sūn zhǎng guì yòng shǒu yī hú lū, bǎ shǒu yě tàng le. zhuō shàng yǒu yī wǎn wú gēn shuǐ, zhè wǎn liáng shuǐ jiù le mìng la! wǎng nǎo dài shàng yī jiāo," huā!" huǒ miè le. lǎo dào yī kàn tou dào líng fú méi chéng gōng, zài lái yī zhāng, bǎ dì èr dào fú diǎn zháo, sūn zhǎng guì yī qiáo:" hǎo xiǎo zi de lǐ bù ràng rén a, shāo wán zhè bàn lǎ zài shāo nà bàn lǎ, yī gēn tóu fà méi yǒu le. nǐ dāng lǎo dào, ràng wǒ dāng hé shàng, zán liǎ yí kuài huà yuán qù. wǒ bù xiǎng chū jiā ya, bié róng tā zài shāo wǒ le, wǒ xiān gěi xiǎo zi yī gōu gān zǐ ba." chāo qǐ gōu gān zǐ lái, chōng zhe lǎo dào miàn mén miáo zhǔn ér. | |
| lǎo dào zhuāng mú zuò yàng de bì zhuó yǎn jīng, yáo huàng nǎo dài, zuǐ lǐ dū dū rāng rng jiǎ zhuāng nà ér niàn zhòu, tā zhè yī bì yǎn jīng, sūn zhǎng guì dé lǒu ér le. zěn me? tā hǎo miáo zhǔn ér ya. ná zhe gōu gān zǐ lái huí yōu dá, yōu dá huān le, tā shuō zhè jiào gān ér cháo qián, gōu zài hòu, qù zhe mù, wǎng duì guò ér chǒu, duì zhǔn le qián quán sā hòu shǒu ér:" zhe jiā huo!" tā yào shì bù hǎn zhè jù ya, zhèng dǎ dào lǎo dào de miàn mén shàng. tā zhè yī hǎn, lǎo dào zhēng yǎn yī kàn, zhí chuō chuō yī wù, zhí bèn miàn mén ér lái:" wú liàng fú!" wǎng páng biān yī xié shēn ér, hái suàn hǎo, méi dǎ zhe. nín kě tīng míng bái lóu, gān shì méi dǎ zhe, hòu tou zhè liǎ gōu kě bù ráo rén a, pū chī yī xià zhèng gōu dào sāi bāng zǐ shàng. wǎng xià yī bō gōu gān zǐ, dài xià liǎng tiáo zi ròu lái, téng dé lǎo dào wǔ sāi bāng zǐ zhí niàn fó!" wú liàng shòu bù liǎo de fú!" sūn dé lóng hái gēn zhe qǐ hòng nǎ:" bù liú shén, āi jiā huo!" lǎo dào zhè gè qì ya, ná zhe gōu gān zǐ yī kàn, tā bù zhī dào gàn shén me yòng de, xīn lǐ gèng hài pà le:" āi yā, wǒ tài bù shí shí wù le. gāng cái zhè wèi fǎ guān yī lái de shí hòu, shì jiǎo jià xiáng yún, jīn guāng hù tǐ, cóng tiān ér jiàng, zhè yí dìng shì shí bā luó hàn jīn xiān. xiàn zài yī kàn guǒ rán shì dà luó jīn xiān, rú ruò bù rán zěn me néng bǎ xī tiān rú lái wǒ fú de bā bǎo rú yì zǐ jīn gōu ná lái." qí shí shì dā zhū yòng de. | |
| sūn zhǎng guì kě lè le!" xiǎo zi, nǐ bǎ wǒ tóu fà shāo diào le hái néng zhǎng a, nǐ zhè sāi bāng zǐ pò le, jū wǎn de bú huì bǔ a!" tā xīn lǐ yī tòng kuài, kě gāo xìng le. lǎo dào gèng hài pà le, tóu dào líng fú wǒ shāo le tā bàn biān fà jì, èr dào líng fú wèi zēng fā yòng, tā jiù dǎ le wǒ yī bā bǎo rú yì zǐ jīn gōu. zài yī qiáo sūn zhǎng guì nà ér, dī liū yí gè qián kǒu dài, lǎo dào gèng dí gū le:" tā hái dài zhe bǎi bǎo náng nǎ!" zài yī kàn, sūn zhǎng guì yāo lǐ tou shuān zhe jiǔ hú:" hǎo jiā huo! hái guà zhe fān tiān yìn nǎ!" zhè bú shì dǎo méi cuī de ma, tā qiáo shén me dōu yǒu yòng la! yuè zuó mo yuè hài pà, gān cuì sān shí liù jì zǒu wéi shàng cè!" wú liàng fú, pín dào wǒ yào huí guó jiāo zhǐ."" āi! nǐ yào shì zǒu wǒ kě jì fǎ bǎo!"" bié jià! wǒ qù xiān jiàn nǐ jiā wàn suì yé." shuō wán zhè huà yī dǎn páo xiù, mào chū hēi yān biàn le gè xì fǎ jiù xià tái le. zǒu dào tài hé diàn shàng wǎng nà ér yī guì, kē tóu jiù rú dǎo suàn:" tiān bāng dà guó wàn suì kāi ēn, xiǎo guó shǐ chén qǐng zuì." huáng shàng nǎ ér kàn de míng bái ya! kě shì tā men liǎ dǎ de yǎ mí niàn de shén me" wú liàng fú"" hǎo jiā huo", zhè quán bù dǒng yòu qiáo lǎo dào ná huǒ shāo rén, sūn zhǎng guì ná shuǐ bǎ huǒ shāo miè le, huáng shàng gāo xìng le:" hǎo! shuǐ néng kè huǒ." yòu kàn lǎo dào yòu diǎn qǐ huǒ lái le, xīn xiǎng tǎo yàn de dōng xī, nǐ yǐ jīng yíng le hé bì gǎn jìn shā jué. huáng shàng jìng gù qiáo zhè huǒ le, méi kàn jiàn gōu gān zǐ zěn me guò qù de, yī qiáo lǎo dào sāi bāng zǐ liú xiě le, huáng shàng pāi zhe bā zhǎng zhí lè:" wǒ guó fǎ guān dé shèng le. hǎo fǎ bǎo! hǎo fǎ bǎo!" xiàn zài yī kàn lǎo dào xià lái le, huáng shàng míng bái, zhè shì tā shū le, shuō:" zhēn rén, xiàn zài nǐ hái yǒu shén me huà jiǎng?"" ā yā! tiān bāng dà guó wàn suì kāi ēn. bì guó rèn shū, qíng yuàn nián nián jìn gòng, suì suì lái zhāo."" ! wǒ dé wèn wèn nǐ, nǐ men liǎ jiàn miàn, nǐ shuō' wú liàng fú' zhè shì zěn me jù huà!"" zhè shì wǒ men chū jiā rén de jiàn miàn lǐ ér."" nà me tā shuō nǎ' hǎo jiā huo' nǎ!"" nà wǒ shí zài bù dǒng, bù zhī dào shén me jiào hǎo jiā huo."" nà me nǐ shuō nà' wú liàng shòu fó' nǎ?"" zhè shì wèn hòu."" nà wǒ guó fǎ guān shuō nà jù' yī dà duī pò làn jiā huo' nǎ?"" zhè shì fǎ guān jiā huo tài duō." yī zhǐ sāi bāng zǐ," wǒ zhè bú shì āi le yī jiā huo ma!" hòu lái nǐ bù shuō huà, shēn yí gè shǒu zhí tou shì zěn me huí shì?" shì dǎ yǎ mí, wǒ shuō de shì' yī fú dǐng lǐ'."" wǒ guó fǎ guān shēn liǎ ne?"" tā shuō tā yǒu' èr shèng hù shēn'."" nǐ shēn sā ne?""' sān huáng zhì shì', nǐ jiā fǎ guān yòu shēn wǔ gè, tā shuō yǒu' wǔ dì wèi jūn' wǒ yī pāi xīn kǒu shuō,' fú zài wǒ xīn tóu zuò', tā yī pāi nǎo dài, shuō tā' tóu shàng yǒu qīng tiān'." hēi! quán méng duì le! huáng shàng shuō:" nà me nǐ nà huǒ shì zěn me huí shì qíng?"" wǒ zhǔ kāi ēn, wǒ shì xiǎng jiāng guì guó fǎ guān rēng xià fǎ tái."" hēng! chū jiā rén bù jiǎng cí bēi. liǎn shàng shì shén me shāng de?"" bā bǎo rú yì zǐ jīn gōu." tā jiù bù zhī dào shì dā zhū yòng de, guì zài yī páng tīng gè hòu fā luò. | |
| chí shàng wǎng fǎ tái shàng yī kàn, jiù gēn jiě dà rén shuō:" zán men de fǎ guān zěn me hái bù xià tái ya?" tā yě de xià de lái ya! sūn zhǎng guì zài tái shàng nà néng ér zhuàn mò:" āi! zhè shì zěn me huí shì, dǎo shì shū le yíng le"? tā hái bù zhī dào nǎ. huáng shàng yī qiáo, shuō:" xiǎng bì wǒ jiā fǎ guān bèi mó huǒ shāo shāng, gǎn kuài pài rén bǎ fǎ guān jiē xià fǎ tái." huáng shàng zhè jù huà dé xíng dà le. gāng cái rēng shǎng qù de, zhè yào shì wǎng xià tiào fēi shuāi sǐ bù kě. huáng shàng yī shuō bǎ tā jiē xià lái, yǒu rén lì hǎo le yún tī, sūn zhǎng guì shùn tī zi jiù xià lái le. jiě dà rén guò lái shuō:" zǒu, gēn wǒ jiàn huáng shǎng qù, yào duō kē tóu shǎo shuō huà." zěn me? pà tā jiàn huáng shàng zài lái gè" zán gē liǎ lǎo méi jiàn le". sūn dé lóng dào le tài hé diàn tóu lǐ, chōng huáng shàng zuò le gè dà yī:" hē!" huáng shàng yī qiáo, nǐ yào yǎo wǒ shì zěn me zhāo?" zán gěi lǎo huáng shàng kē tóu le." tā zhè yī yíng, huáng shàng gāo xìng:" fǎ guān tái qǐ tóu lái." bié rén dōu dé shuō" yǒu zuì bù gǎn tái tóu"," shù nǐ wú zuì", zhè cái tái tóu." sūn zhǎng guì mǎn bù dǒng, yī tái tóu zhí méi dèng yǎn qiáo zhe huáng shàng:" gàn shén me?" shàng rén jiàn xǐ, huáng shàng lè le:" fǎ guān nǐ dòu fǎ shì shū le shì yíng le?" sūn zhǎng guì jiù pà wèn zhè jù, shū yíng lián tā zì jǐ yě bù zhī dào, tā dī xià tou qù zhuāng tīng bu jiàn. tā zhè yī dī tóu, huáng shàng yòu wèn:" nǐ shū le nǐ yíng le?" tā wǎng páng biān yī kàn, zhèng qiáo jiàn lǎo dào. zhèng gǎn shàng zhè shí hòu huáng shàng wèn zhè dì sān jù:" fǎ guān! nǐ gēn lǎo dào dòu fǎ shì shū le shì yíng le?"" wǒ shuō huáng shàng, nǐ lǎo rén jiā wèn wǒ shū le yíng le, zhè gè huà wǒ bù hǎo shuō ya! zěn me ne? wǒ yào shì shuō wǒ yíng le, nà jiào lǎo wáng mài guā zì mài zì kuā kě wǒ yào shì shuō wǒ shū le ba, wǒ gàn shén me lái le? méi yǒu jīn gāng zuàn jiù bù gǎn lǎn cí qì." jiě dà rén yī tīng: nǐ nǎ ér nà me duō qiào pí huà ér a!" nǐ lǎo rén jiā wèn wǒ shū le wǒ yíng le, nǐ bié wèn wǒ." yī zhǐ lǎo dào," nǐ wèn tā! tā shuō wǒ shū le jiù suàn wǒ shū le, tā shuō wǒ yíng le jiù suàn wǒ yíng le. lǎo dào! nǐ yào shì shuō wǒ shū le zán liǎ shàng tái zài gàn." lǎo dào yī wǔ sāi bāng zǐ:" gàn bù liǎo! tā yíng le."" huáng shàng tīng jiàn le ba, wǒ yíng le! wǒ yíng le!" huáng shàng shuō:" fǎ guān nǐ jiào shén me míng zì?"" wǒ xìng sūn jiào sūn dé lóng, zhù jiā zài ròu shì, dé lóng guǎn nà gè xiǎo mǎi mài shì wǒ kāi de, zán shì zhǔn jīn shí liù liǎng jué bù shǎo gěi fèn liàng." shuí wèn zhè gè le!" nǐ men liǎ yī jiàn miàn, tā shuō' wú liàng fú' shì zěn me huí shì?"" zhè' wú liàng fú' shì zěn me jù huà, huáng shàng! | |
| zhè gè lǎo dào wǒ rèn de." lǎo dào yī tīng xià le yī tiào, tā rèn de wǒ, wǒ zěn bù rèn de tā ya? nǐ nǎ ér rèn de qù, tā shì mài zhū ròu de!" zhè gè lǎo dào shì huà yuán de."" huà yuán gàn má shuō' wú liàng fú' nǎ?"" wǒ kāi ròu guǎn zǐ, tā men huà yuán, hé shàng niàn' mí tuó fú', lǎo dào niàn' wú liàng fú', jiù shì gēn wǒ yào qián nǎ."" nà me nǐ shuō nà' hǎo jiā huo' nǎ?"" wǒ shuō' hǎo jiā huo', xīn lǐ xiǎng, zěn me gāng zǒu liǎ yòu lái yí gè?" lǎo dào tīng zhe zhè tōng ér wō xīn nǎ." nà me nǐ men liǎ rén dǎ yǎ mí, tā shēn yí gè shǒu zhí tou shì zěn me huí shì qíng?"" sūn zhǎng guì yī xiǎng: zhè huí kě zāo le, lǎo dào shēn yí gè shǒu zhí tou shì gēn wǒ kāi wán xiào, tā shuō shì bǐ wǒ dà yī bèi, wǒ shēn liǎ, wǒ shuō bǐ tā bà bà dà liǎng bèi, zhè huà bù néng gēn huáng shàng shuō, huí tóu zhè lǎo dào ruò yǒu le zuì, yě xǔ jiù miè mén jiǔ zú, tā bǐ wǒ dà yī bèi, wǒ bǐ tā bà bà dà liǎng bèi, zěn me yě méi chū jiǔ zú a, gān cuì wǒ xiā biān gè cí ba, zhè yī biān cí bǎ lǎo dào gěi sòng xià lái le:" huáng shàng! tā méi gēn dǎ yǎ mí!" huáng shàng shuō:" zěn me? tā shēn yí gè nǐ shēn liǎ, tā shēn sā nǐ shēn wǔ gè, tā yī pāi xīn kǒu nǐ yī pāi nǎo dài, zhè bú shì dǎ yǎ mí nǎ ma?"" bù! zhè shì jiǎng mǎi mài nǎ!"" jiǎng shén me mǎi mài a?"" tā zhī dào wǒ shì ròu shì shàng mài zhū ròu de, tā miào lǐ tou bàn xǐ shì tā xiǎng mǎi wǒ yī kǒu zhū." wǒ shuō, nǐ bié shuō mǎi yí gè, nǐ xiǎng mǎi liǎ wǒ dōu yǒu wa, tā shuō, yào gè sān shí lái jīn de, wǒ xiǎng, wǒ nà ér dǐng shǎo yě yǒu wǔ shí lái jīn de tā shuō kě dé dài xīn gān fèi wǒ shuō, béng shuō xīn gān fèi, lián zhū tóu dōu guī nǐ ya!" |
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